Questionable Bones + Slime

it's always "you gnawed off your own leg to escape like an animal caught in a trap" and never "why didn't anyone try to help you out of the trap" or "why weren't you provided with any other resources to escape the trap with except for your own teeth"

When maids and concubines do murders in historical dramas I don’t think that’s a crime. They should be allowed to do that

we need to bring back the phrase "what business is it of yours" in a big way i'm serious

i know you can just say "none of your business" but phrasing it as a question with a jarringly formal tone is the ideal way to shoot an overfamiliar unwelcome overture dead in its tracks and force the person making it to confront the boundaries they're taking for granted + it would really piss people off which is funny

&also it allows you to experience the joy of talking like an autistic vampire, which i highly recommend

Everyone is always saying "ohhh torture doesn;t work" and I'd just like to say fuck you fuck you fuck you. you have such a reductive idea of "working" it's sickening, maybe i want unreliable and forced testimony huh??????

Adding on to this, IGNORANCE is also NOT purity. Ignorance and naïveté does not make a person more pure, more wholesome or more moral - in fact most of the time, in my experience, the exact opposite is true. Nobody is more dangerous than someone who doesn't understand the power they have to hurt other people, and the only way to understand that power is to be knowledgeable of its consequences.

Ignorance is pure in the sense that concentrated nightshade extract is pure. There's nothing else in there, and that's a bad thing.

she's platonic about it but in my opinion, stratt 100% treats grace as her dead wife. she keeps a tacky fox trinket in her coat pocket. there's a framed photo of him in her study . he's grinning goofily in it (bc he's a dork). new guy like: is that her husband? / no, dumbass, it's dr. ryland grace, 1/3 of the hail mary mission. / oh, fuck. were they... ? / yeah, it's unclear. black-and-white montages of grace messing around in high-level meetings play every time stratt contemplates committing more environmental crimes. she looks up at the night sky and vaguely wonders if he's enjoying his space ramen. that's her dead wife. she killed him.

Grace and Rocky are living in like this whimsical space adventure. Meanwhile, back on Earth, Eva Stratt just ordered her fifth assassination this week trying to stop WW3. The other day she replaced Jeff Bezos with a homonculus clone grown in a lab so she can repurpose Amazon into a humanitarian aid distribution network. She had a team of lawyers trick a demon into extending her lifespan by 30 years just so she can live to see through Project Hail Mary.

this is too much I'm gonna- *remembers joking about rewatching supernatural is harmful* kill myself

Also the concept of the Prince over the course of like… a couple hours hanging out with Cinderella  going from ‘Haha nice I really like you’ to ‘oh fuck i can tell from context clues alone that your home situation is FUCKED UP’   it’s good shit   ‘I have just met you but ON GOD I’m gonna get you out of there beautiful mystery woman’   cinderella  makes desperately yelling into the night ‘how can I find you again!??!’ when she’s taking off that much more poignant really

#okay this is genius#I love this#love at first sight is a tough sell#but ‘I just met you but you are so clearly in desperate need of help that I am already planning where to hide the bodies’#is a trope I absolutely love#going from hello to ride or die in a matter of hours#isn’t a ‘you’re hot’ thing#it’s a ‘my fellow human is trapped and suffering and every instinct I have is screaming its need to help’ thing