t.

gideon’s first kiss: peck from a literal planet in the shape of the girl she’s in love with while gideon’s pretending to be fully dead, instead of mostly dead

others have already made some really smart posts about how kiriona is gideon when she’s lost everything and everyone that made her who she was, and how even in the first two books, gideon was this terrifically sad creature who was disguised by the fact that she was her own narrator.

but I want to expand on that last bit, because yes. kiriona is a gideon who has lost everything, who has had to make tough decisions to survive, who has had to adapt to being primarily around her father (a manipulative asshole) and ianthe (ianthe). but this is also the first time we’re getting to see gideon from a perspective other than her own.

we’ve always known that gideon is a beautifully unreliable narrator - see her complete understatement of the fight before harrow opened the tomb, where she neglects to tell us that she almost killed harrow with her bare hands - but I think that for a lot of us, the introduction of kiriona was when we first felt that.

now, nona is not an objective narrator either (lmao). and she does actively dislike gideon (which is fascinating, and which I could go on about for several posts). but she does offer an outside perspective on gideon that we have, up to this point, been lacking.

because… yeah. sometimes, like anyone, gideon’s kind of mean. we know she’s a good person - her goodness is in many ways one of the central drivers of the plot - but that doesn’t mean she’s nice all of the time. it’s just that when she’s being mean to crux, or ianthe, or even harrow we can say, well that person deserved that. but the truth is, gideon has lived through the kind of hell that very few people could survive with any kind of goodness and softness left intact. she didn’t live through it, in fact. she’s just kind of… existed through it.

I saw another post point this out, and I want to reiterate: gideon’s goal, her whole life, has been to join the cohort. when we first meet her, we’re like, ok, makes sense, that’s the only ‘out’ available to her. and we kind of forget, even as we learn more about the empire, that what gideon wants to join is this actively and horrifically violent imperialist force. when we get to nona, and we meet hot sauce and her gang and joli and the angel and even the edenites, we expect gideon to have kept up with us somehow, to reject the empire. we want her to be one of the “good guys” (goodness in the tlt universe is another longass post I want to write…).

but gideon doesn’t reject the empire. because, crucially, she IS the empire - she is its heir, never mind the fact that that doesn’t really mean anything when the current emperor is immortal.

what I am trying to say is this: kiriona is gideon when you take everything from her, and then replace it with her father and everything he represents, and then take a step back.

that step back is crucial. it is what allows us to remember how imperialism - and by extension, or by metaphor, cruelty - works. gideon becomes cruel because she is in proximity to cruel people, AND because she is not in proximity to us.

THAT is what Muir is saying with kiriona. even the most kind, good, earnest protagonist can become a tool of evil in the right circumstances: and those circumstances include perspective. gideon, like it or not, is currently actively choosing to be a tool of empire. and if we were in her head, we might be able to - or we might be tricked into - accept her justifications for why she’s doing it.

the perspective shift is what allows us to see gideon as she - currently - truly is. it is no accident that this is when we get the outside pov. Muir allows us nowhere to hide; we have to confront what gideon has become and by extension what she always has been.

gideon nav is a good person, and I fully believe that in alecto we will watch her reject her father; I fully believe she will get to be a hero. but in order for that to happen, she - and we - must first undergo radical change and growth in terms of her worldview and attitudes. kiriona is not gideon’s final form. but in the same way that john is described by harrow as having aspects, kiriona is the aspect or facet of gideon that embraces cruelty, that perpetuates empire.

STATION 19 | Come as You Are (6.09)

She looks exceptionally good here… like she’s not showing off any muscles, but you can just tell she’s fit as hell. Also I’ve noticed that Maya developed this little habit of twisting her rings when she’s talking. Especially when she’s talking about Carina or she’s talking about her feelings. It’s like she’s being vulnerable and exposed, and somehow her wedding ring to Carina keeps her safe and reassures her that she’s okay…

I can’t stop thinking about Maya and Carina’s arc on Station 19 this season. It’s bewitched me body and soul in a way that network television really hasn’t in so long so let’s talk about it (gif makers thank you in advance!).

To put it lightly there’s been a longstanding “tradition” to ruin queer relationships in television. Either death, disagreement (who wants kids?) or the show’s cancellation we rarely get to see a full arc from their initial meeting to dating to engagement, marriage and all the bumps along the way. Marina really is incredibly rare. I cannot overstate how rare they are. Sure they’re on an ensemble show but they’re fully on network television in very much a primetime slot. Thursday nights are as coveted as it gets in network - it’s huge. This season in particular has really just been so well thought out as they’re fully utilizing the previous three seasons (and really the whole series in Maya’s case) to create an incredible emotional arc. This is also why I’m constantly going off about the importance of network television! The longevity of it is what gives such depth to storytelling that you really don’t get in any other medium. 

Okay but why are Marina important? And why this arc? Honestly, I’ve just never seen a sapphic relationship handled with this much care. I’ve never doubted that they would actually break up even after that hospital scene. There’s been so much groundwork laid this season that has constantly given reassurance in a way that’s made this such an incredible journey to go on (and it’s not done yet). There’s never been any doubt to how much Maya and Carina love each other no matter the situation. Their rift wasn’t caused simply for the sake of drama but to borrow from Maya’s metaphor: their foundation was never finished. It was never solid and filled with cracks. We know Maya’s mental health was at risk, we’ve known since the beginning of this relationship but it was never Carina’s job to fix (as much as she tried). 

What Station 19 has done so well is explore how these characters who deal with traumatic situations day in and day out also need to handle their own trauma. Is it perfect? Absolutely not but the appearances that Diane has made throughout the show have all been incredibly impactful. I would love to see more of Carina’s backstory at this point (there’s so much there!) but Maya’s growth especially this season is some of the best I’ve ever seen. Instead of just ending this marriage completely, we’ve been shown that Maya is capable of working through her issues. That she’s redeemable and that relationships take work (so much work!). It’s such a mature way to handle this and we almost never see it in media and definitely not for queer relationships. 

The fact that these two characters from different shows with such similar backgrounds were put together and it worked in every way conceivable is as magical as it gets. I haven’t even touched on Danielle and Stefania’s chemistry because it’s just too much to talk about. Let’s just call it fantastico and appreciate the beauty of every one of their interactions. 

Warrior Nun - Avatrice For Good (Wicked) - Ava’s verse

It well may be that we will never meet again in this lifetime So let me say before we part So much of me is made of what I learned from you You’ll be with me like a handprint on my heart And now whatever way our stories end I know you have re-written mine by being my friend

Concentrate.