how did you get into religion? i want to learn more because i find it extremely interesting and i was raised Catholic, but I don't even know where to start! do you have any suggestions? 🤔
ahhh it's been a long journey!! This post is kinda a yapfest sorry💀
right off the bat my best advice for starting out would be right in this post i just answered!
as for how my own religious path started:
i think the earliest factors in my conversion that I can recall was reading fanfiction... like literally😭 long story short I was (and still kinda am..) really infatuated with the infamous my chemical romance fanfic called unholyverse and basically it revolves around Catholicism and the lead singer Gerard way being a closeted gay priest working for the vatican and hes in love with the guitarist frank iero who has an evil form of stigmata- BUTTTTT THATS NOT THE POINT😁🤗😇👍 (its actually an amazingly written piece of literature i fear. gulp)
ANYWAYS. From interest in that fanfic stemmed interested in religious imagery, and i found myself spending hours on Pinterest adding to a board dedicated to catholic imagery and such. and through the icons, I fell down such a rabbit hole of Marian lore and just catholic theology in general I just was suddenly obsessed with this beautiful mythical world that i'd stuck myself in; and soon the line between simple aesthetic based enthusiasm and increasing desire to believe in Christ became thinner and thinner, and eventually i began to genuinely question conversion
this is why im such a huge fan of Visio Divina, because its the beauty of God and the Saints that drew me in! learning about all the crazy Marian apparitions and miracles also made me question if catholicism was something i would place my trust in, in fact Mary was (and still very much is) the one who has guided me through my whole spiritual path which has, of course, led me to Christ and the other occult facets to my Faith. she prayed for me when i was too scared to talk to the Creator of the whole literal universe myself, she was by my side in all my questioning, all my doubts... if theres anyone who knows the joy of placing your heart with the Stella Maris i would be one of the anyones lol!
but the thing that was impeding my arrival to the Faith was one thing: doctrine.
no matter what my religion is, the things im interested in, the phases i have, my core morals never waver under anyone. i know that queerness, sexuality, bodily autonomy, woke beliefs, feminism, use of stones and herbs that literally come from the Earth God created, etc etc, cant possibly be sinful, unholy, or shameful.. right? would i have to give up what i love and stand for if i took this path? is this religion truly just full of the bigotry we attach to it? i thought i would have to give up considering it all because i'd have no other way to go that would support both my beliefs and thirst for Faith, but along all those lines is where i found christopaganism.
looking back now i took this path of syncretism mostly because at the time i felt like otherwise there would be no way for me to have freedom in christianity, but really i was just in a progressive catholic mindset. but regardless i think im really meant to believe what i believe in the first place because ultimately; its all resulted in mysticism. my craft and Christ intertwine perfectly, God and the Saints and Spirits have answered me in ways that show me nothing but approval, love, and blessing. i love my Lord, i love the Blessed Mother, i love the Holy Death, i love casting spells of compassion and justice into the world with the help of God, i love everything i do!! and i think if i stuck to one side of my religion i would not have reached my full potential, and THATS the sense of freedom i was likely unknowingly craving.
its not for everyone, but its for me. ive experimented, ive questioned, ive reframed, ive changed, ive taken quite a bit to figure out what was the best for me and im still shaping my unique Faith every day!
it took a lot of discernment, learning, and trying. and a lot of nights in which i sat in my room spilling the good bad and ugly of my guts to the Lord, and just as many where i stared into the moon in the cold night begging Mary to show me what to do. trying to understand. trying to put it all into words. trying to repent... i didnt bother to edit my words or lie just because He already knows everything, but because my soul was so profoundly overwhelmed by this new love i had grasped that it was like every thought, even the uncomfortable ones, just poured out of me into the ears of He who i know was waiting for me.
so i pray, i preach, and i follow the Bible. but i also cast spells, charge crystals, and venerate 'non christian' spirits
i could honestly describe some of my religious Firsts for hours, its all such an amazing feeling😭😭
