Qinxiin

Along with #qinlovemyselfseries, I convey and speak myself through BTS' songs. Each were made according to my own feelings at that moment. More details on my insta (@qinxiin)

Epiphany - Jin

"I'm the one I should love in this world. No i'm not perfect, but oh so beautiful."

Promise - Jimin

"Promise me now. No matter how many times you feel alone in a day, don't throw yourself away. Promise me."

UGH - RM, J-Hope, Yoongi

"Here, everyone turns into someone with perfect morals and judgement. How funny"

Mic Drop - BTS

"You're a tasteless ratatouille. If you're jealous then sue me, sue it"

So here's the thing

I've decided to grow out of Hamilton and do what's best for me.

I know for sure that i wont get as much attention as when i posted Hamilton, but I rly want to improve and try new things. I just realized that i hate being stuck in the same position for a long time, so i have to move forward.

Ive also come to realize that id need not to apologize for my own growth. But i do feel bad for disappointing those who are here for my Ham fanarts

I rly want to thank the ppl who encourage me to stand for myself. I rly cherish each and every one of you. I printed some of yall's words and sticked them to my motivation book bcs they rly do mean a lot to me.

I lost a lot of followers on IG and got flopped on a lot of my posts. But i actually am grateful for it bcs i could see how many ppl follow me for my art itself, and not the fandom. Plus, im proud of myself for being brave enough to get the weight off of me.

To keep it short,

Welcome to the new era 👺✨

Do tell me if i made any mistakes <3 Hope this helps!!!

Song: Epiphany - Jin BTS (english cover by Ysabelle Cuevas)

It has been idk how many weeks and i'm still not over this song. Wow.

YES IK IM SUPER LATE TO THE FANDOM HAHA BABY ARMY COMING THROUGHH

I wanna show u guys how i feel when i listen to this song through this piece.. The serene and safe feeling, the emotions, etc.. Hope i depicted them well

"Epiphany" is basically a song abt self love, the main idea of BTS' album. In this song, he talks abt how he changed himself so much in order to love someone else, but then realizes that he should love himself as who he is first

Get urself a whole crowd to sing abt self love, who else could make them do that except for BTS eye-

So if u ask why i love bts, that's why. Not only their pretty faces, but also the messages they deliver. Huge respect to them and also BH TvT

I used myself as the model bcs i kinda relate to this song, how i should put myself first (though i dont relate THAT much bcs i dont think ive ever done that much damage to myself regarding to this situation)

Stream stay gold 👑

Let's just say that the angie and peggy's teaching eliza how to flirt meanwhile laflams be there posin like pros 😂

This was super rushed sryyy haha (i had to post smth 😭)

Ref: my bbies

This is a joke AU inspired by that one request of john and eliza as kpop idols.. Some of you wanted me to make this AU come true based on the poll i did a few days ago so i did and i toooootally did not use bts and bp as references haha 😐

I dont like how the schuyler sisters one came out but im gonna post it anyway bcs im too lazy to fix it and an earthquake just happened so i couldnt focus anymore lol

Idk if im gonna continue this AU

@glitterqueenart , @maitefdezart , @glossiicloudss and @avery_arts_1223 's #sixartmonth (on IG)

My first ever six fanart, a genderbent Anne Boleyn XD

I really enjoyed drawing this especially on the accesories!! The encouragement you guys gave made my love for drawing even more deeper, i don't think i've felt this alive since ever haha 😂

Note: I'm not attention-seeking or anything, this is just a vent. Feel free to skip <3

I noticed that people follow me for my fanarts and that I gain quite a lot of attention (ultimately on IG) bcs of them. On one hand, I feel super grateful for it, knowing that you guys enjoy the art I create. But on the other hand, i feel a little... Guilty (?)

Because it seems like i'm using someone else's character & story instead of my own.

And also, i feel like i "couldn't escape" the fandom(s) i'm in because once i do, i'd lose a lot of attention (especially because i'm known in a certain fandom). Note: I'm not saying that i'm going to leave though.

If some of you notice, i've started to draw more of other fandom's fanarts (and even some original art). I tried getting out of my comfort zone although my insight would drop real fast.

Call me addicted but I keep monitoring the numbers and they actually do affect my performance. Lately, i get kinda stressed out and my insecurity kicks in because a lot of people unfollowed me after those posts.

No matter how hard i tried nor how much time i spent, nothing actually worked. I treasure each and every engagement (likes, comments, and reshares) i get on the new ones, and start to not care abt the engagements i get on the fandom related posts. Everything felt numb for a moment.

Now i get why people say that fanarts are the highway to popularity. I feel like im cheating bcs there are actually a LOT of underrated artists that are better than i am. That's where i started to doubt myself. I couldn't help but think,

"Am I actually good enough? Do I even deserve this much attention..?"

Yes i do get it, i also follow artists for their fandom related contents sometimes, and unfollow some when they don't post them anymore. That's why i couldn't blame anyone

I didn't want you guys to be disappointed at me.

There were some points where i kinda forced myself to make fanarts and eventually "got sick of it", so i took a break from drawing at all. I got back because i know that some of you wanted to see more of my art and i don't want to leave you hanging, too.

But either way

I'm still proud of being a fanartist because i get to improve my art a lot and meet people who share the same interest i do. You encourage me to work on my art even more, i wouldn't have gotten here if it weren't for you guys. Each and every words you say are the reason why i'm still here.

Y'all are the best istg, huge thanks to those who have been here since the beginning (i might as well mention them but i don't wanna make this post too long haha). And also to those who follow me merely for my art!! 🙌

Wow, you made it till the end!! I'm super grateful, tysm!! I'm happy that i could at least be a part of your day. I want to be your inspiration and also the reason why you're still fighting. Now, i let me say:

Thank you so much for supporting me ✨

I'll keep on improving for you, just you wait!