bright-eyed

     A pang of guilt throbbed in his stomach with the saddened look Ketsu made, gaze softening considerably. All of this must’ve been confusing and upsetting, especially since he hadn’t really explained much of anything. It was his fault.

     “I’m sorry…”

     “I left Tokyo for a reason, and I’d rather it didn’t catch up with me… And I definitely don’t want you hurt because of it.”

It was a bit confusing--even with Tatsuya being so gentle and understanding at this moment, he still considered himself a bad person. Ketsu merely lifted his head, returning his attention to the taller male. He pretty much--again--ignored what the other was saying, only focused on one thing at the moment.

     “I am.”

     “I am a bad person, Ketsu…”

     Finally admitting it was a lot easier than he had thought, but probably only because of the situation he was in and whom he was talking to. Or maybe it was the idea of pushing Ketsu away before he found out everything that made it so easy. “That’s why you can’t talk to them. In Tokyo, I–”

     He cut himself off there and swallowed thickly. “Just because I am how I am now doesn’t forgive me for what I did then.”

It didn’t take long for Ketsu to glance up at Tatsuya, eyes widening a bit at the words. His anger was still there, of course, but he stayed quiet for a long while. What exactly did Tatsuya do so bad that he couldn’t forgive himself for it? It made Ketsu’s face fall, clenching hands tighter. 

     “Wait–”

     Tatsuya reached out and gently grabbed Ketsu’s arm, just above the wrist in order to get him to stop walking away. There was about a minute of silence after that as he considered exactly what he could say that would get the smaller boy to stop this nonsense. He didn’t want Ketsu to do something he didn’t need to, or to end up getting hurt because of it. Not because of him.

     “It doesn’t matter. I don’t care what they say about me and you don’t need to talk to them about it.” Another sigh as he finally let the other’s arm go to drop his hand back to his side.

     “… And I don’t want you to find out anything else from them.”

Ketsu was immediately brought to a stop when Tatsuya grabbed his arm. He blinked several times, surprise clear on his face as he returned his attention to the other student. Almost immediately, he replied, voice louder than before, “I care! I care what they say about you!”

     “…You’ve seen my back,” he started, referencing the large tattoo of the dragon surrounding a lotus flower. It seemed somewhat off topic, but he’d get there “I got it after my parents…. After the crash. I wanted to change for them.”

    Tatsuya puffed a small sigh and ran his hand through long strands of hair. “I wasn’t… exactly the best person back then. One of the worst, actually. I, ah… I apologize. I should have told you sooner before you found out like that. I understand if you don’t wish to speak to me any longer.”

Ketsu almost opened his mouth to reply--what did his tattoo have to do with anything? But it didn’t take long for Tatsuya to explain. The redhead’s expression slowly began to fall little by little as he got the gist of where the other was going with all of this. 

“...Oh,” he finally murmured after awhile, gaze resting on Tatsuya’s face for awhile before it flickered away. There was a tense silence for a few minutes before the shorter male finally spoke again. “Still!” Even though he couldn’t really imagine Tatsuya being that bad, it didn’t really change anything. Rumors were rumors, and it was best to get the story right by asking directly from the source. 

     For a second Tatsuya had hoped he was in the clear – that the rumors were only accusations that had no basis in truth made up by a sad group of students who were jealous of his grades. Or something along those lines. Instead it was exactly what he hadn’t wanted to get out.

     There he was making that face again, the smile falling almost immediately.

     “… Do you believe them?”

If anything, Ketsu didn’t expect that question. Surprised, the redhead glanced up towards Tatsuya, a bit confused. Again, there was that look. And it was aimed towards Ketsu. It made his stomach twist up a bit, arms falling back to his sides. 

     “–… Eh?”

     Tatsuya paused again, blinking at the boy’s reaction. Ketsu was worried about him?

     “Ketsu-san, I–” He had to stop for a second, blinking again and allowing a quiet chuckle to escape him. “I’m not worried about the rumors, per say, just what you may have heard…” He trailed off a little, and smiled lightly.

     “Please tell me..?”

Again, the boy stopped, glancing away from Tatsuya towards the wall. Why wouldn’t he be worried about him? Things like this were important--Tatsuya was his friend, and he wasn’t going to let anyone just say whatever they please about him. “Stupid stuff...” Ketsu finally muttered under his breath.

     Of course Ketsu would get irrationally upset about something like that instead of brushing it off. Tatsuya had hoped he could avoid all of… this here, but apparently that wasn’t the case.

     “… May I ask what they were saying?”

He wanted to know what it was about? Didn’t people usually ignore those type of things? Or at least, didn’t want to hear the worst of it. Clenching his hands into fists, Ketsu spoke over him, leaning forward suddenly. 

     He was taken aback by Ketsu’s words, pausing for a second before his expression became solemn.

     “No, it’s alright. You don’t have to bother yourself with them. I apologize that you had to hear those things…”

     Tatsuya didn’t deny it, instead attempting to brush it aside like he was used to it – which he was. He just didn’t want Ketsu to find out anything he didn’t want to know.

Tatsuya’s expression had changed. Huffing irritably, Ketsu stepped closer, “What! No way! It’s totally not faaaair!” By then, he was whining, mostly to himself.

     Oh…? Tatsuya blinked, a bit surprised about Ketsu’s sudden nervousness. Even so he offered a smile.

     “Of course, ask away.”

“There...” 

    “No need to thank me. Did you forget yours at home?”

“Yeah, I was in a rush earlier...” Then he proceeded to trail off from there, frowning a bit.

    “I insist! I have another at home, I don’t mind.”

Hesitates for a second, wondering if he’s serious or not.