"I'm not a hallucination"

Neil who never lets Andrew carry his own bag through an airport or out of a stadium, even though Andrew is inarguably bigger and more muscled than him. Who always keeps the freezer stocked with ice cream no matter the circumstances. Who keeps a bubble of space around Andrew when they’re walking through thick crowds, always a bicep or an elbow in the way to stop people from getting too close. Who gets his wallet out every time they get dinner like Andrew doesn’t make 80% more than him. Always free shoulder and feet massages, post-game and in-bed and whenever, without Andrew ever having to ask. He always washes Andrew’s hair first in the shower, always cups the water away from his face so soap doesn’t get in his eyes.

Neil who is always down to do Anything Andrew Wants, Ever. Andrew wants to go on a drive in the middle of the night? Or an impromptu road trip in the off season? Sure, Neil’s grabbing the keys. On the road they pass a pungent, fresh-made bakery and Neil turns the car around without uttering a word. Neil, who, after years, always answers the phone when Andrew calls on the very first ring — who turns his full-attention to Andrew when he calls his name, even in the most crowded room. Who does pretty much anything Andrew asks of him and anticipates dozens of other wants and needs. Who always goes out of his way to make Andrew’s life easier. Neil, who puts Andrew above anything and everything else.

Andrew makes Neil deal with all the bugs in the house, especially spiders, but Neil refuses to handle moths because they give him the heebs.

Andrew gets a scar from a drunken escapade with Neil and Kevin where they all scale a chain-link fence but Andrew gets stabbed in the underboob on the way down. Hospital.

Neil makes breakfast, Andrew makes dinner.

Andrew is far-sighted but refuses to do anything about it until Neil bribes him into an eye appointment some years after graduation. He ends up with these slutty rectangular wire-frames that make Neil want to fling himself into oncoming traffic.

Neil's first year as captain, the Foxes don't make it past the playoffs. He's devastated, but redeems himself next year by taking home the championship cup and helping Andrew finish out his college career on a win. The Foxes win next year, too, and Neil rides that high all the way to his first pro team.

Andrew Minyard babysitter of all time. He is the only one capable of keeping track of all the fox children at once. Designated barbecue baby watcher. It's kind of baffling but all the kids love him despite his flat demeanor. He treats them like tiny adults and they love that shit.

Neil is less good with kids, in the sense that the little ones always come back to their parents knowing more bad words than they did before, but Neil is still endlessly fascinated by them all. He can't believe there's a miniature Dan Wilds running around. He can't believe he gets to play exy with Amalia Muldani-Day in the backyard while Andrew blows bubbles on the porch.

Andrew decides he likes going to the movies at some point. It is not uncommon to see him at the back of a movie theatre, sometimes alone, sometimes with Neil in tow. Horror is a favorite, but comedy and historical fiction can hold his attention here and there.

Neil takes up drawing, especially during the off-season. He is far from good at first, but meticulous practice lends itself to some significant improvement. He'll sketch moments he caught on camera the day before, eager to wring some more dopamine from the moment. He gets utterly familiar with the side of Andrew's face whenever he can convince him to sit for him. Their fridge is littered with various sketches and photographs and on hard nights, Neil will sit on the kitchen floor and stare.

Neil steals the street sign for Perimeter Road when he graduates and slowly has all of the original foxes (+ Robin) sign it over the course of the next year.

Not the most suspicious character. Not the one that makes sense. Just some guy.

And then he commits.

It doesn't matter how much evidence points elsewhere as the story progresses. Neil will spend the entire book inventing increasingly ridiculous theories to explain why his suspect is still guilty. Every new clue gets twisted into supporting his argument somehow. Contradictory evidence? Clearly part of the cover-up. Alibi? Fabricated. Confession from someone else? Obvious misdirection.

Andrew rarely engages with any of it, often ignoring Neil's take altogether, but he continues updating him on the case anyway, so Neil hasn't stopped.

There's also cero context when they talk about it so it leads to situations like this:

Andrew, entering the room: the old lady from the bakery is dead.

Kevin: what? who?

Neil, gasps: she faked her own death, she's smarter than I thought.

Kevin: wha-

Andrew: recognisable body, she is dead.

Neil: she killed herself then.

Kevin: you know what, I don't even wanna know.

Andrew: stabbing herself herself 27 times?

Neil, shrugs: to each their own.

Kevin: ahhh, the fucking book, ok

Andrew: there was another murder after hers.

Neil: Oh, that makes sense. The corpse they found was her secret twin's. Perfect alibi.

Hear me out.

Neil has had to lie to stay alive. He is good at reading people, he is good at faking and masking and tricking and manipulating when he is in need. But he is not in need any more.

Neil Josten is the real person who blossomed from a lie when he was given a safe space and people that cared. #10 Fox from PSU is the most real he has ever been able to be. And he knows it.

Neil Josten is a horrible liar because he loves not needing to lie. He is able to lie. He will if needed without missing a beat. But when there's no need? He is deliberately bad at it.

He doesn't try being good at playing amongst us, or werewolf (mafia? How is this game called in English speaking countries??)

He comes up with extremely obnoxious lies that are imposible to mistake with the truth when he doesn't want to answer a question:

Neil breaking into Wymack apartment because he is having a bad night and he is paranoid:

Wymack, still half asleep: Neil? What are you doing here?

Neil: I don't know how to tell you this, but I'm actually a werewolf and there's full moon outside so I can't go back to campus until it's daytime.

Wymack, sighs: does your werewolf form need to talk it out or just being away from moonlight?

Neil: no moonlight is enough...?

Wymack: ... I'm making us coffee.

With the variation of gaslighting media:

Intervier: Neil, what are your thoughts on your teammate Kevin Day and Thea Muldani being named couple of the year?

Neil (who knows it's a fake relationship), looking straight into the camera, the most confused he's ever been: who?

Interviewer: eh... Thea Muldani?

Neil: nono, I know who Thea Muldani is. Who the fuck is Kevin Day?

Interviewer, pointing at the poster behind Neil where Kevin and him are possing together: him.

Neil, stares at it for a good 30seconds before looking back into the camera and whispering: I've never seen him before in my life. Pretty sure that's photoshopped.