nerdforpuns

Mood

Same.

Me

Ok, I’ll bite. What’s capitalism?

capitalism is the generally ritualistic practice of eating the flesh of one’s own species

No, that’s cannibalism. Capitalism is the scientific name of the plant you smoke when you want to relax

No, that’s cannabis. Capitalism is an electronic handheld device that’s used for doing math.

No that’s a calculator. Capitalism is the eastern European mountain range mostly in Romania.

No, that’s the Caucasus. Capitalism is a fat worm that becomes a butterfly. 

No that’s a caterpillar. Capitalism is when you have your testicles removed.

No that’s castration. Capitalism is when something truly terrible happens and everyone stands around saying that it was probably the will of God and there’s nothing to be done about it since that system works.

No, that’s a catastrophe. Capitalism is a behavioral syndrome marked by an inability to move normally. The word “Capitalistic” is also often used in casual language to refer to a person who doesn’t appear to be responding to any stimuli from the outside world.

No, that’s catatonic. Capitalism is a religion led by a man in a funny hat who trades in souls.

No, that’s Catholicism. Capitalism is another name for the governor of a castle.

That’s a constable. Capitalism is what you feel when someone gets what’s coming to them or falls by their intrinsic character flaws. It’s a kind of emotional release.

You’re referring to catharsis, I think. Capitalism is a molecule found in a lot of spicy foods which bings to heat receptors on the tongue, causing a burning sensation many find pleasurable.

No, no, that’s capsaicin. Capitalism is an espresso-based coffee drink that originated in Italy, and is traditionally prepared with double espresso and steamed milk foam.

I believe you are thinking of cappuccino. Capitalism is a mammal native to South America. It is the largest living rodent in the world.

You’re mistaken, that’s a capybara. Capitalism is a disease caused by an uncontrolled division of abnormal cells in a part of the body that causes thousands of deaths a year.

No, that’s cancer. Capitalism is an American war hero whose primary tool is a big metal dinner plate.

Nope, you’re thinking of Captain America. Capitalism is the whistle noise people make to get women’s attention.

no notes but it keeps getting faster

Anxiety

No note November

This is so accurate it hurts. 

This is so cute!

The type of quality content I like to see