Private Thoughts

“They can’t love you. Someone who doesn’t have a heart of their own can’t love you,”

Nothing about this feels right. Should I have just kept being his friend? Should I have left? Did I do the right thing? I’m so scared that I made a mistake but I’m more scared that I didn’t and that this is how it’s supposed to be. It’s a lonely feeling.

“I didn’t want us to end up like this. This is exactly what I was afraid of. I didn’t want us to act like strangers, or maybe even less because we can’t even hold eye contact, because we can’t ever talk again, because we can’t ever know each other again. And maybe I loved you so much that I wish we hadn’t fallen in love, just so I could have kept you by my side, even if it wasn’t as a lover.”

“Missing someone I shouldn’t even be thinking about.”

“You don’t miss me. I should remember that.”

“When I touched your face, I could tell you had moved on. And everything in me tells me that I should walk away but I just want to stay”

i am terrified that twenty years from now i will still look back and feel an ache when i remember the boy who broke my heart all those years ago. and i’ll somehow still miss you. but for you, i’ll probably be just one of the many girls you dated when you were young. you’ll look back and only remember a foggy memory of me; my face, a blurry vision in your mind.

“If I could wish for anything in the world right now, it would be to hear a familiar voice say, I missed you.”