૮꒰ ˶• ༝ •˶꒱ა ♡

I love the ways youve grown

The ways youve stood by me

How you've dreamed

You've protected

Transformed

All

I want to be your witness for life

My shell like flesh grows and the softness tries to reclaim

Because why would I?

Why would I be something to stand for

It is because I am always the secret

Never good enough to be a reason

Never good enough to induce a pride

When will I remember to drink water again

I just want my evidence to be seen

and my wound to be seen

and to be held until the ache quiets

To be coddled and cherished and spoken to softly until my strength returns

Why do I never earn love like that?

I want you to know that I love you

You are beautiful

You are lovely

You are helpful

But then it's never the right moment to stay say anything

I want to stop feeling scared enough to check

And yet, I can't

Because, even if just once every now and again,

But why is it there at all still?

Nearing 6 months now

Everything of mine, 6 months gone

6 months ago I committed to letting go