Pri Diaries

I managed to grab something expensive looking and totally date worthy dress last night.

Went through over 50 makeup videos to do my face before giving up. How do these youtube beauty bloggers look so flawless, and why do they claim it is so easy to put on all that makeup on your face by yourself and look pretty. I tried the smokey eye, it made me look like a ghost out of a 40s horror movie. 

I am on the phone with a lady at Sephora, begging her to squeeze me in for a few minutes for a full glam makeup and she snorts like I was being ridiculous.  

Sephora girl: Ma’am full glam makeup will take you at least an hour. We’re all booked for the day, If you like I can book one for tomorrow? Around 6 pm?

Me: Tomorrow? 6pm? WHAT!!!? (in one breath..)No..... Miss... this is an emergency situation. I need someone to fix my face. I have a blind date tonight. This could be my only chance at true love or I may die all alone. What if I die all alone??All this because you denied me of looking my best. Seriously. Please do something. <sobs>

Sephora girl: Let me see what I can do. I am sorry ma’am, we are fully booked for today. You can do one thing tho. Come in for eye makeup, it is walk in. And you can go to another Sephora for your face. Partial makeups are walk ins and there is another Sephora 5 miles from us. That’s the best I can do.

My friend from work (Fact: If I ever stopped counting co-workers and facebook friends, I would probably be left with about... mmmm... lets see... NO friends!! well wait, no, I would have 2 actually! :) ). 

Okay, so my friend from work fixed me up with a guy she knows. I thought there was no harm trading my solo jam sessions/youtube video marathons with a blind date. 

There are times when I am hanging on the brink of slipping into an acute depression. Usually it happens when all my thoughts rush to me at once - how I’m growing so old with no man nor prospects, job that is not going anywhere and boss who hates me (well, not that I like her very much). I have learned to deal with one problem/ feeling at one time like I can deal with the fact that I have a sucky job and then I shop and forget about it. Next I can deal with no boyfriend situation, shop and forget about it.. But when all of these come to me at once, I’m instantly disarmed.

I left the mall cuz I couldn’t find one thing I could buy in 15 stores !! When that happens I know it’s time to put on my PJs and turn on Bridget Jones diary or Julie and Julia.

So I’m gonna order pizza, finish these two bottles of red, maybe drunk call my bff in New York and sleep it off, this one.

Treadmill is the only gym thingy I know who to use - okay this one time i did use the one that kinda has a step that goes up and down. Anyway, I am 5 mins on treadmill and I start hyperventilating. This is what happens when you haven't gymmed in like forever! Is “gymmed” even a word? Wateva! 

So I spent next 30 mins walking on it watching all the flawless people workout - like they even need it! (eye roll). This woman next to me is a perfect size 0 with boobs and a perfect booty; how does that even happen? selective mass accumulation in one’s body! Think her boobs aren't real, are they? they can’t be. Damn she caught me staring at her buttocks :| EEEE... Okay, guess it’s time to leave now. 

I’m in the office today, researching laptop cases for one of my writeups. One link to another and before I know it, I stumble upon my ex's facebook picture. 

Looks like he was partying hard with some blond bitch with a Jlo body and Paris Hilton face !!!!! #fml Looks like somebody had a better weekend than me. Damn exes! Is she even legal to enter a bar? what’s up with men in their 30s. Why can;’t they just be like women; gulping down wine while whining about the neighbor’s dog. Damn you, Tyga, go back to your lovely wife. (Errr...)

Like any other day, I woke up late, rushed to barely make it in time to office. Driving in LA is the worst. It is times like this that I miss New York subways so much. Besides the obvious craziness and insane crowd on the trains; at least I used to tune out everything and read a book while traveling. Anyway, my non-glamorous work life has nothing worth mentioning today, besides that I had to sit in a day-long workshop (which I had totally forgotten about while drinking last night) on writing well. 

I write boring press releases for companies no one has ever heard of for heaven's sake, and I have been doing it for years now, I wonder what's more to learn about writing straightforward facts (eye roll) not that all press releases are straightforward facts. I mean really the amount of crap one sees in a press release is enormous.

My shades got me through the day, so no one noticed my genuine disinterest or that I was hungover. I’d say that was a win.

Even the dimwit, size 2, red head from Selfie, who doesn’t know college can be for 4 years, gets men!! #Need2getmylifetogether Maybe if I lose 20 pounds, fit into those really skinny short shorts like Taylor swift, I could possibly find the love of my life and live happily ever after like in her music videos.

(thoughts..) Omg Taylor Swift is absolutely flawless, it’s as if she is a super-human or something or maybe she is a highly advanced robot in disguise like from ExMachina, damn! I watch too many movies. I like her style like tots. I wish I was friends with her for real, we would bake cakes in our PJs for 4th of July  #coolpartyideas #needtoremember 

White button down shirt is a closet staple - check out different ways you can wear it (via Great White Shirt)