People aren’t as interested because it doesn’t occur to them, but I only listen to baby making music, while eternally unable to make baby.

I kind of love that for me.

I’m texting my own mind or some shit.

I’ve always liked me, I’m good company.

I should think of a tag, I feel like people are supposed to read back they’re thoughts and I never went back to reflect on all those passages before I deleted everything.

Maybe I should look back every three months or so to think about the differences. See what I complain about, maybe I’ll find out what’s really bothering me and it won’t be that I’m supposed to suffer and be alone.

It’ll be ok this is normal just like go get some therapy.

Obnoxious to have all these issue and be like oh I don’t need talking help. I’m smarter than that.

This music is lit too Kendrick and childish gambino back to back.

I’m a little tipsy now.

I wish I was drunk, nvm I’m not gonna be drunk.

I don’t want to write my stupid thought down but it’s not helpful to sit and force myself to think something that is appropriate for journaling.

I was annoying today. I don’t know if it’s just others or myself. I’m annoyed mostly by me. Everyone is normally annoying but I’m perfect so I’m sure I feel off because I’m not sure about how I’ve acted today.

I fully intended to ignore the doctor but maybe not my boss. I wish I didn’t tell that stupid story at lunch like, I should have insisted but also, it’s not that big a deal. My boss has told us a number of things about a previous marriage and partners that have committed great sins and how it was dealt with.

I’m confident I left out the part about me being a whore.

I’m maybe sad last night was so boring, I wanted to watch the blood moon but I’m not surprised that didn’t work out. I wanted to do work while assassins creed plays in the background. I wanted to do anything, but it was another night of whatever.

I’m caught between being disappointed that I’m only ever happy to sleep and satisfied that I look forward to it. I really work so much that there isn’t much time to enjoy it. They work some and are a very tired person. Together we sleep.

I miss being woken up and yelled at by 9:00pm because I fell asleep on the couch. The law firm was draining and I never stayed up past dinner time. I never got back up to spend any time and now I wish I could find some exciting reason to stay up.

I like being reminded of sitting outside the Dunkin manically typing for an hour before my phone overheated. I don’t like quitting because of it. I maybe needed to stop trying to convince myself that I liked that boy. I was just a whore.

Now, I’m a reformed whore. Now I don’t need it. I’ve never needed it. I just want it. I wanted it bad.

I liked that this isn’t sensible like the last time. I was so obsessed with that little boy and it was all so much. I have such a large capacity for love but I’m glad that now I have the time to focus on other things. Anything else.