literally said out loud to myself 'i need to do something to calm down and regulate my nervous system' and then opened tumblr.com. like a guy in a horror movie going to check out the scary sound in the basement.

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@popcandy
literally said out loud to myself 'i need to do something to calm down and regulate my nervous system' and then opened tumblr.com. like a guy in a horror movie going to check out the scary sound in the basement.

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Yoongi's letter about Kobe. I cried so much because of that letter. I finally felt like maybe my feelings were validated because someone else was feeling the exact same way. I still cry when I read it. But it pushes me to deal with my mental health and get the help I need when I get really bad.
THE TIME BTS CANCELLED A CONCERT BECAUSE:
First, I will begin by giving you the facts of what exactly happened at the BTS concert in Kobe…
In December of 2015, BTS were scheduled to perform their HYYH concert in Kobe, Japan. The first concert on the 26th went smoothly as any other concert. However, the next day, the concert was cancelled suddenly.
Fans had moved into the venue as normal. Most of them had bought merch and waited in line for hours to be the first ones in. However, a few noticed that the concert didn’t start on time. It was delayed by about 20 minutes. Only 5 of the members made their way on stage. There was no intro VCR, music, or great lights- only the members, excluding Taehyung and Yoongi. A japanese translator informed the ARMYs that the concert would be suspended. The lights dimmed and the remaining members began to perform Hold Me Tight- one of the only songs that V assisted in writing. The members barely moved on the stage. Both the audience and their performers were frozen.
After Hold Me Tight ended, Let Me Know began to play- one of Suga’s first produced songs. They performed the song just as solemnly as they had Hold Me Tight before Namjoon then addressed the ARMYs, telling them that V and Suga didn’t feel well during practice and were rushed to the hospital. In fancams of this moment, you can hear the audience crying out
Because they were two members short, BTS had decided to cancel the concert, as it wouldn’t be fair to ARMY to see a performance without all the members. He told them that they would perform only the last song and he hoped they would enjoy it for Taehyung and Yoongi.
Then the concert ended.
Staff informed the audience that they would be refunded for the ticket and many fans left crying.
Taehyung was indeed sick. He had pushed himself too hard and began feeling faint during the practice of the 151227 concert. BigHit always takes extreme precaution when it comes to the care of their boys and Tae was immediately rushed to the hospital for a check up. He wasn’t terribly sick, but he certainly was not fit enough to perform their track list for the concert.
Suga was also said to be feeling ill.
Though as time passed, Suga was feeling “much better” for performances way before Taehyung was fully recovered.
However, it seemed that there was something awry. While having a sick and missing member is quite sad, many ARMYs at the concert noticed an especially heavy aura of sadness from the five men that stood before them. Some ARMYs say that Jin and Jungkook actually cried on the stage while performing Hold Me Tight and Let Me Know and others say that J-Hope looked sadder than they had ever seen him before.
THE LETTER
Yoongi knew that he had let ARMYs down and he addressed his feelings through a series of statuses on Twitter only a few weeks after the concert…
“Hello, this is Suga. Many people were curious as to what I was doing on my break, and to simply put it, I walked a lot, slept a lot, and thought a lot. I wanted to go on a trip to organize my thoughts before working on my mixtape. I also had a place I must go to. And I wanted to do things I was able to do not as a 24 year old BTS’ Suga, but as a 24 year old Min Yoongi. It was a time where I looked back at myself. The things I will say now are things I wanted to share not as a Singer and Fan, or as Bangtan and ARMY, but to talk to you as human to human.
The most upsetting time for me when I face a large number of people, is when I face myself who isn’t able to be fair to everyone. I didn’t want to hurt anyone, but there are times I couldn’t do that. I think I’m still a person that lacks in many things.
The second day of the concert in Kobe.. I don’t think I’ve ever slept deeply after that day. Could it be because of the fact that I gave a wound to many people? Whenever I fell asleep, I would wake up with cold sweat.
Because I already once have not been able to go on stage before and have hurt many people, I said that I’ll go up (to perform) no matter what situation arises. Everyone tried to stop me. I really cried a ton at the situation of not being able to go up on stage. And I know crying is losing.
It’s really easy for me to cope with my own sorrow, but witnessing those who love me in sadness is very hard. I made them sad, once again. If I could go back to that day, I would go on stage no matter what.
So there was just one place to go. I went to Kobe during my break. Many people tried to stop me from going, but I didn’t want to be ashamed of myself any longer. So I just went to Kobe.
It was my second time visiting the concert venue after a concert. The first was Ax Hall at late night after finishing the first Red Bullet concert. The second time was the Kobe World Memorial Hall, at where I failed to perform.
I hate becoming a numb person. I didn’t want to take the love and these glorious days for granted. I didn’t want to be a numb person. That’s why I visited the venues again on my own.
But after the second day of the Kobe concert when I was unable to stand on stage, I didn’t have the courage to confidently confront the large number of people. So that’s why I visited Kobe, the concert hall again. I kept wandering around the area by the concert hall from the time I arrived there until the time our performance was due to begin that day.
From the ticketing booth to the entrance and the concert hall - I wanted to feel the same emotions as you all from every nook and corner. I felt many emotions. Happiness, the excited nervousness felt while waiting for the performance, sadness, resentment, anger, regret, etc. , I wanted to understand you all, and I do understand. So I’m sorry and apologetic, for I am not a perfect human being.
I’m a person who is weak, but acts strong. Once again I realized that I was a person who’s lacking. Although I’m not religious, I prayed at that place. After all at the end, it was a fated day. Even if it’s ended, let’s not let this heart become numb.
To me, who wanted to spend every moment alone, you all were taking up quite a large part (of my mind). Age and gender, nationality and religion, what language you use - all of that isn’t important to me. The day that we unexpectedly caught a Music Bank broadcast and boarded a plane and returned a day before planned I returned after organizing my many thoughts.
Once again, while feeling that I’m a blessed person, I felt that I need to be a person who lives every moment feeling thankful.
Thank you for making me a blessed person, ARMY,
Although I’m never able to say this because I’m bad at expressing myself.
Here I am conveying my feelings and thoughts once more through a piece of less-than-satisfactory writing.
I will live while being thankful of every moment as I am such a lacking human being.
I love you, ARMYs”
YOU CAN FIND THE LETTER ON TUMBLR HERE
Cr x
suddenly missing yoongi a lot and remembering this
SUGA on SUCHWITA ep 19 ♡
Wild Pear Tree
by Kaveh Akbar
it’s been January for months in both directions frost over grass like pale fungus like mothdust the branches of the pear tree are pickling in ice white as the long white line running from me to the smooth whales frozen in chunks of ocean from their vast bobbing to the blackwhite stars flowering into heaven the hungry cat gnaws on a sliver of mirror and I have been chewing out my stitches wondering which warm names we should try singing wild thyme cowslip blacksnake all the days in a year line up at the door and I deflect each saying no you will not be needed one by one they skulk off into the cold the cat hates this place more than he loves me he cannot remember the spring when I fed him warm duck fat daily nor the kitchen vase filled with musky blue roses nor the pear tree which was so eager to toss its fruit so sweet it made us sleepy I stacked the pears on the mantle until I ran out of the room and began filling them into the bathtub one evening I slid in as if into a mound of jewels now ghost finches leave footprints on our snowy windowsills the cat paces through the night listening for their chirps our memories have frosted over ages ago we guzzled all the rosewater in the vase still we check for it nightly I have forgotten even the easy prayer I was supposed to use in emergencies something something I was not born here I was not born here I was not
do it scared do it stupid do it alone etc etc but don’t do it hungry. eat a snack first
also don’t do it dehydrated. go drink some water
Sleep on it, if you need to

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lewis high off his own tears and sheer will to survive while lando is looking for the nearest cliff and this is the time max decides to start cracking jokes i have never said anything bad about formula one in my life
Helen Frankenthaler
may by Alex Dimitrov
uptown, Minneapolis, Minnesota by Hieu Minh Nguyen
Franny Choi, The World Keeps Ending and the World Goes On

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WHAT DO YOU MEAN KEVIN MAGNUSSEN STARTED THE 2024 SEASON WITH ZERO PENALTY POINTS ON HIS LICENSE AND NOW SIX ROUNDS LATER HE’S TWO POINTS AWAY FROM A RACE BAN??? KEVIN WHAT THE FUCK???
on snooze of a season too 😭
In honour of the last race of the season, here are some respectful moments from 2023 🩷
the group of men competing against each other in a high performance sport all going out to dinner together after the end of their championship they all fought so hard in should not be making me as emotional as i am
Jeremy Miranda
#the loving and intentional recreation of mundane things my beloved (x)
mood tbh

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I think what people need to understand is how Lance has always taken a stride when it comes to speaking up.
During 2020 I remember reading somewhere that Lance was one of the first to kneel with Lewis.
He has also been the driver that openly critized Abu Dhabi 2021 to most.
He has often called out unfair/unsafe situation, this isn't a first time.
it’s always so meaningful when someone interprets you accurately, or says a spark of a phrase, a half-a-sentence, that resonates with you so intimately that it feels like they’ve dipped a finger in a lake of you and made a ripple that goes on and on and on