PomPomJester

Pompomjester25

Loved 𝚋𝚢 Mimi

Indie RP blog for Pomni from The Amazing Digital Circus.

Canon Divergent, headcanon heavy, multiship, Semi-selective, 18+ only

She wanted to laugh at the question, but the truth was she had stopped being okay a long time ago. Still, she kept that bright tone she always reached for, the one that usually helped everyone else feel a little steadier. "I'm fine, Pomni, really. Believe me, it could always be worse! You know how things are around here there's always something wild happening, right?"

A smile stretched across her face, the kind that might as well have been stapled there, stitched tight and familiar. Her cotton hands kept twisting, wringing herself out as best she could, squeezing away the lingering dampness that clung to every seam. At least it wasn't snow this time that really was much worse, all cold and heavy and impossible to ignore. "It kinda feels like I'm melting from the inside out, honestly. I've asked Caine if we could maybe do some adventures where I wouldn't have to get wet at all. I'm sure he just forgot, what with everything else on his mind. It's fine, though. Really, it is."

She waved a hand that still felt weird and heavy from all the water, the motion a little slower than usual but cheerful all the same. "But thanks for asking, though. It's nice of you, Pomni. Very nice. You're always looking out for everyone, and that means a lot, you know?" Her eyes stayed fixed somewhere past the jester, not quite meeting her gaze as she kept talking, filling the space like she always did. "I should probably go check on Jax. I know he doesn't like water either it messes with his fur something awful, and you know how he gets when he's in a mood. I'll see you later, okay? We can chat more then if you want."

She couldn't understand why she even wanted to ask how he was doing when she already knew he'd just tell her to piss off. Well, she thought she didn't know. Inside, she really did. She wanted to be liked and appreciated by someone.

Or maybe even just acknowledged, just once, without having to patch everything up for the others first. How depressing was that? With that quiet thought lingering, she began to walk away from the jester, her stitched steps soft and deliberate as she tried to hold onto her usual optimism.

Pomni blinked as Rags began to ramble. Her eyes searched the dolls lone one, confused and a little concerned with whatever the hell was going on here. Had she said something wrong? Or was something else bothering the older girl...?

"Hey are you sure th-"

The little Jester was just about to ask what was wrong but before she could, the redhead was off again, causing the little brunette to clasp her mouth shut yet again. It felt like a whirlwind. Even just the slightest try to crack Ragatha's mold only got it coming back at you ten times over. That couldn't be healthy-

"Hey w-wait! Rags-"

This time she WAS going to get a word in. Before the redhead could flutter away, gently the little jester, would grab her by the arm, gently tugging her friend to turn back and look at her. When she did she would see the oblivious concern written all over the jester's chalk white face. "Hey man, what was that all about? Rags, what's going on?" She'd let the other girl go before timidly cocky her head to the side curiously. "You know you can just be yourself with me, right...? You don't always have to put on a show and pretend you're okay. I think this is more than just not getting Caine to listen..."

"Are you actually okay, Ragatha...?"

There was a sternness there in her words. She was so tired of people trying to tip-toe around her, trying to keep her happy when all she really needed was for everyone just to be straight with her. Everytime she found herself alone with her in particular, it always felt like she was walking on eggshells with the tiny jester and that just couldn't and wouldn't do. Not anymore.

Ragatha let out a heavy sigh, her patchwork body still heavy and dripping as the portal snapped shut behind them with a sharp pop. Their latest underwater shark battle had finally ended, and salty seawater kept trickling from her ragged yarn hair and soaked red dress. She twisted the dripping strands with both hands, wringing them out as best she could while a few loose threads dangled from her patched-up arms.

Caine had already vanished in his usual flash after yelling something about setting up the next adventure. She put on her brightest smile anyway. "Good job out there, everyone!"

The others trudged off toward their rooms, looking just as worn out as she felt. She had to keep that optimistic spark alive no matter what someone had to hold things together around here, or they’d all fall apart. That was the only way she stayed sane in this place. Her button eye spotted Pomni up ahead, still looking a bit shaken, and Ragatha hurried after her, leaving a trail of small puddles on the glossy floor.

“Hey, Pomni,” she called out warmly, catching up with a gentle smile. “You did really great out there! I’ve never seen anyone scare off a shark like that before.” She gave a soft, reassuring laugh, tilting her head. “Caine doesn’t often do water adventures. Maybe next time we can actually be in a boat. As you can see, I don’t do too well with water.” She laughed lightly as she continued to wring out her body. “How are you feeling? I know it can feel weird being underwater and not having to breathe.”

The more she did the more she was reminded their lives and sanity were in the hands of a incoherent madman that wasn't even a real person. He was an AI who didn't understand the human experience to his behavior.

Caine couldn't fully grasp how crazy he was...

Thankfully Ragatha's voice broke through the chaos of her inner thoughts. She blinked back to reality and stared up weakly, giving a limp little wave in greeting with a matching exhausted smile to boot. How the redhead could keep up the charades when she knew the older woman was bone dead tired too was beyond her. But she tried give her an encouraging thumbs up even as water soaked through her jester hat, making it flop.

"Huh um..y-yeah i'm okay." Pom scrubbed her face with a tired expression. "Thanks though. Had to give up my left leg just to get that stupid fish off my back. Literally." Thank goodness Caine just popped another leg back in the space where she had been missing it from their earlier encounter with the great white. She watched the taller squeeze water out of her hair and grimaced slightly.

Oof. Yeah.

It caught him completely off guard as he attempted to saunter past the group, tossing the pillow he assaulted Pomni with over his shoulder as he went— until Jax feels the jester tug at his arm, and then he’s tumbling to the floor beside Pomni in an ungraceful, cartoon-esque heap, complete with a soft OOF! for effect.

Yellow eyes widen in shock before narrowing to slits, pupils shrinking as he turns his head to lay into the tiny clown, only to find her curled up against his chest and side, with an arm thrown over him for good measure. The rabbit freezes, momentarily stunned and uncertain in a way he’s never been before. It’s different than the ledge, she’s warm against his side, and they’re in the middle of their sleeping co-prisoners in this hell, and it’s just the two of them awake after what was an exhausting day and a half of revelations, arguments and tears.

Tired doesn’t even begin to explain how he feels right now, he realizes. If he weren’t so exhausted from the turn of events, he might be freaking out a little bit more. In all the time he’s been here, very few have gone out of their way to be friendly to him, and even less have been stupid enough to try to touch him, or offer him comfort.

Pomni came along and decided to upend that, and he’s almost bitter that it seems she finally got her way, —because here they are, on the brink of Armageddon, and she’s curled up on him like a needy side piece who just discovered she likes his cologne.

God, but does it even matter? If things don’t go according to plan, there isn’t even going to be anyone around to make fun of him for letting his guard down. If for some reason he doesn’t wake up before Pomni and slip out of this little pile, they’ll have a few days at worst to deal with the fall out, and then they’ll be dead, or too real to give a shit that Pomni got him to show a human emotion while in the avatar of a giant purple jackass rabbit.

This thought spiral that feels like it’s lasted an hour, has realistically only been happening for a few seconds at best, and by the time he finally tunes back in to the conversation, Pomni is wishing him a goodnight.

Jax scoffs, though the sound comes out far softer than he likes, and choosing to let exhaustion win out and accept defeat, he sighs and lets his chin drop to the top of her stupid jester hat, so he can muzzle it until he hears the stupid bells jingle. His arm hovers uncertainly outside of her back, debating what he wants to do with it as if touching her might actually burn him, and he settles it around her back after several long moments of deliberation when tiredness finally wins out.

“Night, Pom.” He murmurs, already letting sleep drag him under. Ordinarily, if Pomni had tried this before tonight? He would have dropped her off of the highest ledge in the circus out of principle and called it a day. Now, however, he is drained. Tired. Admittedly scared to see what happens next, and ready for the few measley hours of sleep he’s promised before everybody else wakes up and starts asking questions.

Before he realizes he’s doing it, his teeth are grinding, a barely perceptible purr coming from somewhere deep within his chest as his ears relax, and the comforting lull of sleep finally pulls him under.

They had a long day and a long night. She wasn't at all surprised he had no fight left to give. They were both so emotionally drained that sleep just seemed like the best option left. Between the screaming and the tears...this felt surprisingly better.

Her eyes peeked open to look at him one last time. He looked so much younger when he wasn't hiding behind a mask or a smile. So much like how he should've gotten to be on the outside world. Comfortable, relaxed. She watched the strain leave his face, watching the furrow of his brows soften and then relax and when he finally fell into a peaceful slumber, she wasn't far behind.

Whatever came next could wait. She wanted to cherish this moment, memorize the warmth of his fur, the soft way he faintly snored in his sleep. Pomni vowed to remember this night for as long as she lived.

His soft purring slowly lulled her too into a deep and much needed sleep. And it wouldn't take long for her tiny fragile form to go limp besides him, out like a light where she laid buried into his side, her cheek gently resting in soft purple fur while his chest gently rose and fell with deep breaths. Both fast asleep in eachothers arms.

They both looked so peaceful, so content like the rest, all of them bundled together snuggly and protectively. And for once nobody would bother the group. Alone in their makeshift peace for just a little bit longer.

Pomni’s legs flail helplessly as she disappears into the pillows with a WHOOMPF! “What a landing! The crowd goes wild!” The rabbit chuckles, wiping away a faux tear, then reluctantly pushes off the wall to rejoin the group— and his impending doom.

What a roller coaster the night has been.

By the time Jax reaches the bottom, he has mostly shaken off that near-mental breakdown. After talking with the jester, he feels lighter, oddly hopeful. Resigned, yes, but eager to see if she can deliver on her promises and help them escape. He finds he actually wants to live up to her expectations. That should scare him, he thinks.

Pomni’s words still ring in his ears, her frustration, her doubt in herself— the desperation to keep him here, and he’s distracted enough that he doesn’t see the pillow coming.

It hits him smack in the face with a soft thud, and before Jax can react, he’s stumbling back. He fumbles for the pillow as it drops, finally catching it and shooting her a glare from behind it. “Rude, Pom— and after I went out of my way to save you.” He laments with a put-upon sigh.

Nonetheless she didn't let him walk passed her. She'd grab his long arm and yank his too tall ass down next to her, plopping him down between herself and Ragatha who had her back turned to him, cuddled up instead against Kinger's chest. The rise and fall of red curls told her that he too hadn't been stirred by their bickering. Good.

She giggled softly as she took her spot against Jack's side, enclosing the little circle the group had subconsciously made in their nest together. Now Zooble laid just a small gap away, closer to Gangle. It was nice. It was quiet and almost peacful. Here surrounded by her little found family? She could almost forget they were hiding from Caine.

The little brunette yawned softly, her eyes closing with a flutter of dark lashes. The little jester hummed as she burrowed into his warmth, hoping he didn't mind the way she clung to him slightly. Now that she knew just how warm he was, she really couldn't get enough of it. He was like a miniature oven.

"Thank you Jax...for tonight." Pom whispered softly. "I hope we y'know...have more of these." There was a beat of silence before she hugged him just a little title. Knowing one day...she might never get the chance to again if she was wrong.

"Tch, hang on a sec, short stack. Let's not get carried away. I never said I believed in you." In the back of his mind, he knows this is his fault. The vicious things that he said to her were bound to stick, even if she brushed them off at the time. Jax never planned on sticking around long enough to see the consequences of those actions, however, and the only thing he wanted to do at the time was make it hurt, to burn any remaining bridges and ensure his own fate.

Now, sitting beside Pomni while she questions herself, Jax can't help but feel guilty. His pupils shrink into nothing as he glances off to the side, an uncomfortable feeling building in his chest. It's a stark reminder of what he'd said to her during their first fight, too, and he rolls his eyes at how affected he's become by this little jester. "If anyone deserves it, it's you. Okay?" It comes out aggressively because he has no idea what he's doing.

The rabbit has never been the type to comfort someone, let alone give a big speech filled with compliments and praises; to say he's winging it would be the understatement of the century. "You're the one who rallied all of us together. It was YOU who picked up on the stupid bucket thing with Nutso-- I didn't even know he had a wife!" Maybe because he never bothered to spend time with him. "If it wasn't for you, we'd be playing Adventureland in a post-apocalyptic world with a talking dog who's mean to us the entire time, with big, happy smiles on our faces. Instead? We're challenging Caine. CAINE. And actually doing something about this stupid hellhole we've all been trapped in." Jax gestures broadly around the circus, devoid of life at this time in the early morning, but his point still stands.

Even with no one else around, it was eerie how cheerful and colorful it all was. Then he's letting his knees down, feet hanging over the ledge, and turning to face the tiny jester, watching her brush her hair away from her face before settling an intense-- if not annoyed-- expression right at her.

"I think you're nuts, and that you're gonna get us all killed. But, if anyone can and is going to do it and get us out of here? It's you. So shut up about it."

Then, he's sliding an arm back around her waist, his familiar smirk sliding across his face as he tugs her in closer. "And fine, but if you want the sad, tragic backstory of everyone's favorite bunny? You're gonna have to be the one to buy me a beer for our not-date, dumba&*^." With that, he uses the arm behind her to give her a shove, sending her sailing off the ledge and towards the ground, where the rest of their group is still fast asleep.

Don't worry, he made sure to leave something down there for her to land on ahead of time, and it's not that far for her goofy cartoon body. It's not like she's gonna die or anything. Pomni takes her life in her hands every day just trying to get out of bed, with her three-foot-tall ass.

But he was right. She hadn't sensed for once a single lie to what he was trying to desperately get through her head. Everything he said, everything that he mentioned...it was true. She had actually done all that. How-...How could she forget all the good she had done...? Why did Jax never forget them...?

'if anyone can and is going to do it and get us out of here? It's you.'

Her heart fluttered with every word of encouragement he gave her and if he looked closely he'd see the threat of hopeful tears on the verge of falling. She sniffled softly and rubbed at her teary eyes, using the motion to hide her red burning cheeks and the watery smile with it. He had no idea how much those words meant to her.

Jax had never been so genuine, so final in his words than what he had said now. Like she was crazy to start doubting herself now. Like this was childs play and she would be fine. She'd get them out of this was ease. It made her smile, gave her hope in a way only he could. For once he was saving her and that meant so much to her. She'd have hugged him again if she wasn't afraid he'd growl and shove her away instead.

"Thank you, Jax..."

When she looked up at him after rubbing her eyes, whatever fear or doubts that lingered in her heart and eyes were gone. Now in their place was her familiar smile and ever so confident determination. If he wanted to bring her out of her rut? He did.

The litter Jester unknowingly let herself be tugged closer to him. She giggled faintly, holding to he chest sheepishly as he cooed his promise. Pom nodded a little. "Pfft, fine. Geeze you're such a princess, Jax-" But right before she could even finish her tease, it happened. Far too quick to doge and far too fast to hold onto him. With a look of bewilderment, she was suddenly being flung off the side of her cliffside Mufasa style. "JAX!" She hissed just as she went flying backwards.

The last thought she had before she hit the pile of pillows below her was simple yet deadly: 'I'm gonna kill'em'. Then BAM! Her little leggies were all that could be seen from her fall into the soft madness of blankets and pillows conveniently left in a heap for her to fall into. She wiggled and kicked her tiny legs until finally she was freed and gasped for breath. Grr, what an asshole. The moment he made it down to them, she rightfully flung a pillow at his face at full force, hoping to knock his ass clean out for that stunt.

That was not at ALL how he expected her to react.

Jax actually sputters, wide eyes filled with mock offense, turning on the little jester who thinks she’s just soooo funny all of a sudden. “Hey! Pinnacle of masculinity, remember?” His loose hand gestures down at his frame, just in case she needs a visual cue. The WHOLE THING is a lie, thank you very much! This is veering into much more familiar territory, the playful banter between them replacing anything heavy left in the air. It's a relief, that's the only reason the rabbit doesn't send her tumbling over the ledge. Or so he tells himself. The same hand he used to gesture at himself playfully pokes her directly in the middle of her giant forehead. “Also? You ever call me a sad bunny boy again, and I’m feeding you to Bubble.”

Relaxing back against the wall once more, he lets her keep a hold of his arm and folds his free one behind his head, contemplating everything that happened here tonight. If he’s being honest, Pomni’s reaction wasn’t really all that surprising. Of anyone else in this freak show, he can’t help but think the clown is the most likely candidate to see eye to eye with him.

. . . Despite him having to pretty much lie on the floor to do so.

She didn’t handle him with kid gloves; that’s what appreciates the most, and despite his warning, she isn’t making it weird. Until she starts monologuing, that is. That's when he realizes that she has completely lost the plot.

His ears flick back, but remain relaxed and unconcerned with listening to the digital world around them, and he props his knee up again, elbow resting on it so he can rest his chin in his palm while he watches the clown enthusiastically plan his future like she's giving a TED Talk. She thinks he'd get a job with her? HAH. At what, an accounting office or something?

Sure, that's realistic. 'So, do you have any accounting experience?'

'Of course I do! Do you know how many Gloinks I had to count to get out of that stupid adventure? Or how many boxes of fries I had to bring to the front of Spudsies when I was working a soulless 9-5 in a digital world run by dentures and a ball of twine?'

That'll definitely get him the job.

Jax doesn't move, save for a slight lean back when she points a finger at him, and at the end of her speech when she takes his hand between hers. Once she finally stops talking, it's quiet again. The world around them is still asleep, and it's just the two of them, staring at each other, one with a hopeful smile and one with a wildly amused grin.

Then, the rabbit takes a deep breath, holds it for a second, and exhales the longest, most drawn-out groan he can manage while using his free hand to gently push her face away from his. "Oh my GOD, could you get any laaaaaaaaaaaamer?" But even he can't dispute the color in his cheeks when, after a moment, he lets go of her face so she can turn back to look at him. "That was so cringe it looped back around to being funny again." And cute, he thinks as he studies the pink in her cheeks-- but he doesn't mention that part out loud.

"So you admit it." Pomni snickered before gesturing to him with another little wiggle of her fingers. Timidly, she'd let his hand go, chuckling softly at his theatrics. "You believe in me. You think I can actually do this." She mused. He never truly said it out loud sure, but the implications were there. He didn't need too.

"Why?"

Pom would asked, cocking her head to the side. "If you're so bent to stay here? If you don't think you have a life worth living out there in the real world. Why would you put your faith in me now?" The little brunette hummed softly, pushing her knees up to rest her arms on their tops and her chin on them in turn.

"As much as I'm thankful you do finally...I'm not sure I deserve it. I don't really know at all what i'm doing. If not for the old man...I would have no idea where to start." Her gaze lingered on Kinger's slumbering form for a moment before a frown faltered her faint smile all together. "I'm just trying my best but I know too well sometimes that's not enough." She murmured.

It wasn't like her to doubt herself like this, she was well aware. But she couldn't help but remember what he said. The words he growled out to her yesterday, before their hug. He said them out of anger but they came from a feral truth deep inside him, one he needed to hiss her way. "I just hope I can do right by all of you."

After a silent moment of thought, she'd turn to face him, sheepishly brushing back a lock of brunette hair back behind her ear before she spoke again. She'd smile, hoping to bring some more levity to their conversation. "But...thank you. Really. Knowing in your own way you got my back, it um...it helps. I know you say to wait on that gratitude but. I think it's alright to give it to you now."

"I have one last question to give you."

"Then I think we should go back down there with the others."

The moment she turns her gaze up at him, Jax closes his eyes so he won’t have to see it. Sympathy reflected in spiraling reds and blues is still too close to pity in his book, and he hates to be pitied. “Congrats, you’re a word smith. Sad sums me up pretty well.” Jax quips, dry and deadpan with no actual anger behind it. Pomni never ceases to make him wonder what the hell is wrong with her. The fact that she’s willing to humor him at all, especially after everything he’s done to her before, is a testament to the fact that she’s nuts. “You’re either crazy, or incredibly naive.” He insists, like he’s answering a question that hasn’t been asked. “I could have been a serial killer out there. Maybe that’s why I never wanted to talk about myself. Knowing about my winning personality first hand, and my pen-chance for violence, you still think you can take on trying to. . .” Fix me? Show me how kind the world can be? The words catch in his throat, and his brows furrow as he tries to come up with the correct thing to say. Is he still trying to scare her away? “. . . Help?” Golden eyes slide open and turn down at her, disbelief tinged with concern clear in his gaze. “That’s just asking for trouble, short stack.”

Jax falls silent after that, content to listen to her. He’s never been compared to someone’s grandfather before, and the joke about comparing her to an old man sits on his tongue, but never moves past it. With nothing to compare to her situation, it sounds like she had a great role model in her life, someone to look up to who had all of the tools in the tool box to turn her into the headstrong little clown she is today.

Is he bitter about it? Is that the feeling building slowly in his chest? Slowly, as she speaks, Jax brings his free hand up just enough to hold in front of his stomach with an open palm, eyes flicking over to it as his fingers flex idly in the air.

"So what if you are trouble? Nobody is perfect, Jax. I sure am not. Neither are you. If i'm asking for trouble for being your friend? Okay? Then i'am asking for trouble. I'm kinda use to that, dude. How did you think I ended up here?" Looking for trouble was kinda her whole thing these days. Apparently that didn't stop in the digital world. "I don't care, Jax. I never have. You should really stop trying to shew me off, man. It's not gonna work." Pomni didn't feel any concern telling him her truth. She didn't see her past as anything to hide since it still was so stuck in the mundane. But she hoped it'd give him some insight on why she did the things she did. Why she was who she was.

Then he started talking about himself and she abruptly realized just how different their worlds truly were. When she had a normal life, he had a rocky one. Where she had parents who loved her, he did not. Where she climbed her way into her very own happy life, he had barley crawled to survive his own. It wasn't fair that their gambles were so unbalanced. "Oh..." Came her soft whisper with every realization. Now it made sense...why he wanted to stay here. Why he felt this was all he had. Because to him, it was. "I'm glad you got out of that environment." It was better than the 'i'm sorry' that almost slipped off her lips. "You got out of there. You got yourself free." Maybe it was that atmosphere that had turned him into...this. Apart of it anyways.

His little mocking grumble at the end only made her more determined to speak. "When you get out of here, you can. You can turn things around now. Make something of yourself. You life isn't over." She pulled away from him with a determined huff, balling her fists and shooting them to the sky with a fierce nod. "I can help you too! Maybe we can get you place at my job! Think of it! You got plenty of skills and you're smart too. You think I won't care about you once we get out of here, well you're dead wrong mister!" Pomni wiggled her little jester finger at his face. "We'll get you that window to kill a plant on. I bet I can find a way." There she went, already too headstrong to be talked out of it now. When she put her head to something it was useless to stop her.

"Oh um...eherm." She realized how stupid she looked then with a pose of determination. Blushing, she'd awkwardly cough into her jester glove before taking a more serious response, though she meant everything she said with all her theatrics earlier.

"Sorry about that, got a little...carried away there, whoops-"

"What I mean is...I know you don't like to be pitted of patronized, but this is me offering, as your friend to help you out if you still need it. I want you to get back on your feet on your own. To make those steps knowing you did that but...I want to offer whatever support I can to help you do that." She explained. With a huff, she'd clasp his hand between her own and leant in with a bright smile.

Control over what everyone knows about him has always been one of the few things he HAS in this hell, and he doesn't like the idea of giving it up. To anyone. Jax has already shared with Pomni things that he hasn’t told anyone before. Things he’s claimed he’s held back for want of being ‘mysterious’, or whatever— but in all honesty? They were things he feared would make him weak, or vulnerable.

She’s proven herself trustworthy, but just how far does that extend? Just because they cried it out and he’s willing to answer a few questions without a shield up, doesn’t mean he’s willing to leave. He has nothing out there, no one. That’s never changed. All of the people he’s ever considered friends are here, and some of them would remain here with him. . .

Jax swallows hard, forcing down the emotions threatening to choke him, now that the floodgates are apparently open. With a sniffle, he brings his free hand up to wipe away any new tears building in the brims of his eyes. Pomni agreed. She promised, reassuring him through her small, squeaky-toy voice, and she looks just as wrecked if more so than he does. The way she clung to him, afraid that he would abstract on the spot, and if she just held on tighter she could prevent it from happening, it spoke volumes about how much trust she had in him, without saying it out right.

After he said all of those things— lied through his teeth, flung vicious insults and lashed out at the small jester who had been nothing but patient and kind to him, and she still found it in herself to stubbornly cling to the hope that he would come around.

God, he’s a monster, isn’t he?

Soft, small hands coil around one of his arms, and he thinks he might not be the only one who needs the reassurance. Now that they’ve touched, it seems like they can’t get enough of it, and the rabbit wonders what he ever did to deserve someone like her. Or Ribbit, or. . . any of them.

This facade is exhausting, and he’s tired. Drained. Clinging to his humor as desperately as he clings to the tiny clown, Jax exhales harshly and glances down at Pomni, taking note of the darker hue of her cheeks. “I dunno, a couple of minutes now?” He answers truthfully, genuinely, for the first time all night. There isn’t a time he can remember allowing himself to act like this, not with anyone, and it scares him. “Acting like this out there, NOT bottling things up, could get you killed. If you showed any kind of weakness, it was over for you.” He continues, flexing his fingers in the fabric of her jester outfit. “It was easier. No one cared if they didn’t know who you were. The only reason any of them care in here is because we’re forced to. Trapped in here with Caine, and these stupid f*^%# adventures, we’re all we’ve got. If you weren’t stuck in here, you’d never give me the time of day.”

Simultaneously, a weight is lifted from his shoulders, and the crushing guilt that comes from thinking about his past descends on him. Pomni is too stubborn, too headstrong. She reminds him so much of Ribbit it makes his chest ache, and he can’t imagine why she or anyone else would willingly sign up to deal with him.

What did he mean that kinda of weakness could get him killed out there? Just where the hell did he come from? What pushed a kid to ever think that way? She wanted to ask. To tell him that isn't true that there's people out there who must care and love him. Who'd hold him through the pain just like this but she didn't know if that was true.

She didn't know just where he had come from. Not yet anyways. "That sounds...so sad." Pomni whispered, her gaze lifting to stare up at him with sympathy. "But I don't think that's fully true." The brunette shook her head. "These are all good people. In here and i'm sure out there I can be too."

"Once we get out of here? I'll show you."

There was a beat of silence. "But reaching out is the first step. This is the first step. You shouldn't have to be afraid to ask for help, man." How could he say that? "You really think I'd not care? Then you really don't know me as well as you think, idiot." She huffed, almost offended he'd assume such a thing about her. He of all people would know now.

His little nudge made her whine softly but she focused on his question all the same. Was she crazy? Maybe but she had long forgiven herself for being so hellbent like she was. "Because I don't think anyone in this world is worth abandoning. No matter how mean of spiteful they are, there's a reason to that misery and there's always a way back from it. My father taught me that." She explained.

"He died when I was in middle school but...everything I ever learned, I got from him. How he treated others. My mother always told me to remember what he taught me when we had him. He would never leave someone to go astray and I feel like I get that from him. No matter how much they try and shove you away. My grandfather was a lot like you. They fought and bickered and all my Father ever wanted to do was help him."

"But he refused and when he died my father felt that he hadn't done enough. That he should've tried harder. It was his biggest regret before he died. I don't want to have that same kinda regrets. I want to actually do more than try and help people who needed it. I wasn't able to understand why my dad tried so hard back then when I was younger but...I get it now. If there's a person hurting...you can't just turn away. I had to do something." She shrugged. "Maybe I am crazy for putting up with your crap for so long." Pom deadpanned lightly with no real bite to her words.