Thoughts on voices in silence
Not supposed to be writing as the body signals. But this life so far has connected the act of writing with the act of thinking. And how is it that one stops the urge to write when the mind constantly disctates thinking. There is something troubling in this connection.
For some, thinking has been is also connected to speaking (up!?). I find myself in situations and the context of this reoccuring theme: silence is not always constructive. I deeply admire this idea. But there are various reasons why the act of speaking is not safe for all and at all times and thus merely connecting the act of speaking with the act of thinking is equally problematic.
On that note and back to writing, this is not to say that writing is silent, although many would support such an understanding. But in many cases I would consider writing as safer due to the distance it can create between the subject and its voice- i.e. it entails a differnet process of rationalisation than the act of speaking.
In any case, it is the expression of the voice that requires attention and the (pre-)conditions and aftermath of its expression whether that is written, spoken or energetically communicated. Why the voice is held back or not? Or why and how can it both lead to self-loathing and self-love in the aftermath of its expression? Most importantly why it often involves an uncertainty around it: was the voice expressed succesully or was that an opportunity missed? Was that the right time and space or was the appropriatness of time and space misinterpeted?
My personal experience tells me that it is the dialectical relationship of both external and internal forces that define a voice’s expression. Sometimes power relations expect us to be silent and we irrespectively express them as a challenge or disruptiive moment to power. This is where the argument ‘we shall not be silenced’ makes sense. Sometimes we look back at the expression, turn into our own judges on the basis of its performative character which can equally lead to pride and insecurity. Sometimes a boomerang or domino effect is part of the aftermath and sometimes our voices are expressed in silence. Not through silence, but in silence.
Expressing a voice in silence can happen in the level of energy and fundamentally requires more than a medium (e.g. spoken or written language) and a message (e.g. the voice), but at the same time does not require much really. To express a voice in silence requires the embodied coordination of the mind and the heart that will translate thinking into a voice to be expressed as energy avoiding the rationalising processes that acts such as speaking or writing require.
To my understanding it follows that the expression of a voice in silence can be actually seen as a first and fundamental step for other forms of expression. If such a coordination is mastered the effect of all forms of expression might be rationalised in a more intuitive sense- i.e. expressing a voice in writing or speaking goes hand in hand with the in silence energetic expression.
This is probably something that happens anyway and I am now actively rationalise through the action of writing. The main problem with voices is not so much to be expressed but to be heard, understood and respected. For a voice in silence even more so as it requires all communicators passive or active to be equiped with critical receptors of energy levels, to be sensitive, receptive and respectful of a voice in silence.
All in all, what I am trying to say is that a voice in silence can be heard too.
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