CHEMICAL OVERREACTION

water sports should be for adults too.me and the blokes at university should be allowed to shoot eachother with water guns

the sewing machine is like if a horse and an inkjet printer had a child

I think it’s difficult for someone who wasn’t raised Christian in a majority Christian area to understand how much Christians hate other varieties of Christians. Maybe you have an inkling of the centuries of bloodshed and discourse that has occurred between Catholics and Protestants but after that, different flavors of Protestantism hateeeeee each other. There are sects that are way more adversarial towards other interpretations of the faith (FUCK evangelicals) and others that are chill about it but one of the greatest enemies in the mind of a Christian is another Christian that doesn’t hate the things their own pastor told them to hate. Because you’re making a mockery of God if you don’t think exactly like they do, obviously, and you should know better because you have the audacity to call yourself a Christian.

This is genuinely part of the reason European colonists came to America. French Huguenots were subject to a number of brutal massacres by French Catholics, the Puritans thought the Church of England was too tolerant to Catholic practices and ended up colonizing New England about it. It’s not like these sects of Christianity got to America and played nice with each other, the Puritans got here and started killing Quakers. The religious struggle between different sects of Christianity and the debate over what constitutes a ‘real Christian’ has been at the core of America since before it was a country.

nobody else doing it like me. particularly because the way i’m doing it is needlessly difficult

evil smoke detector that's contantly beeping and only stops when it detects smoke

In the name of the faggot, the dyke, and the holy tranny, I bless you. Go forth my child, and have as much gay sex as possible

My mom likes to tell me about how when I was a little kid riding public transport with her I'd always smile and giggle and chat with weird old ladies who smelled like cat pee and homeless folks and strangers dressed in bizarre outfits but any time a tidy and respectable businessman in a suit and tie waved at me I'd immediately clam up, and she takes a great deal of pride in my supposed inherentability to clock personalities but the truth is I do vaguely remember those bus rides, and it was never about the clothes or the hair or the smell, but more because everyone "strange" asked interesting questions and listened to what I had to say and seemed to think about what I said while the neat and tidy and rigid folks only ever acted like they were going through the motions, which was boring as hell and also pretty annoying

check this out i'm playing bad apple in your imagination

reblog to play bad apple on your mutuals