my life for you

Could mean good things!

Hey @evilwizard. So, you up to anything new lately?

haha it’s funny you ask

Microsoft windows is always like oh yeah, we closed all your programs and restarted your computer while you were asleep. but don't fret ☝️we installed some spyware as a gift 😃

[staggering to my feet and wiping a single perfect drip of blood from my mouth] i have to get back on my bullshit. no matter the cost

when people are like “he’s not even attractive you could find a guy that looks like him at any gas station” i’m like….. well you see there’s beauty everywhere actually

You can also find a sunset at a gas station

you have to forgive the printer because it's one of the most machine-ass machines we interact with on a day to day basis. that thing says kerchunk. hardly anything says kerchunk these days. you can't get mad at her when she kerchunks up a little.

Crazy that tech has gotten so bad that we're doing printer forgiveness now

WAIT did I never tell tumblr about the haunted space waterpark hotel

I should add that I did not see a single other guest the entire time I was there, which intensified the whole vibe.

There is at least one thing to do in kansas