Αnthropocene ⨯

“Del, stop overthinking it.” Dewi ordered them softly, putting a hand to his cheek. “All I need to know is that you love me… And I know that by how you treat me.” Caleb’s eyes searched their face. It was like looking upon the ancient and terrifying temple of a deity dedicated to love. Their eyes were a warm grey-blue summer sky, threatening to strike a burning flash of lightning at any moment. Their cropped golden-blond hair rested comfortably just above their eyebrows and shone dangerously, making them look like they had a halo in the dim lighting of the bedside lamps. Their skin was pale white but blemished, wrinkling into a dimple in one corner as they offered him that sweet, soft, understanding smile. Their cheekbones could cut glass like a perfect diamond and he adored every inch of that face. He adored every inch of the person who owned it but his inability to say so rattled him with guilt. His repulsion to romance didn’t help, either. His face twitched as he fought with himself then: he collapsed into their arms. “I don’t deserve someone like you.” He told them. “You deserve everything.” Dewi whispered, kissing his crown and wrapping their arms around him.

“It’s not me I’m worried about.” He argued. “Yes it is.” They argued back, pressing their nose into his cheek. “You hide all your worries under them but you’re actually scared of allowing yourself to be the person I see you as.” “And who’s that?” Caleb replied, pushing back against them. “Caleb Cole.” Dewi told him. “The overly compassionate, kind and giving person who stretches himself a little too thinly.” Caleb’s jaw clenched at that. “You’re a good man, Caleb.” Dewi insisted. “You deserve your own life outside of Archie and Jamie.” “It’s hard when two of my jobs involve me being directly connected to Arch-” Caleb tried to blabbled out an argument, “That doesn’t mean that you have to be his moon.” Dewi finished, kissing his cheek. “You can be a neighbouring planet.” He let out a sigh. They were right; he’d spent so much time being Archie’s moon, tethered to his gravity that it was hard to see himself as a separate person now. Even despite his hair being shaved short, his heavy tattoo addiction and his piercings, he was only ever seen as Archie’s exact mirror image - an ‘alt’ AU of his brother. A secondary thought. Even under his own music, he was Catatonik: Archie From Wilderness’ Brother. He’d rarely been his own person but a part of him didn’t really mind. He enjoyed his brother’s company, he liked being on tour with Wilderness and loved that his job (mostly) involved his camera. People forgetting he was separate was just an unfortunate side-effect of that… But then, Dewi saw him as separate. Dewi saw him as a planet that orbited on a path beside Archie and not as his moon. Dewi saw Caleb as a person and had helped him with the image separation by tattooing him. They’d never once referred to him as Archie’s twin brother. They knew what his favourite films were. They knew that he hated sardines and had an unhealthy obsession with fruit pastilles. They knew to give him the corner end of a freshly made Shepherd’s Pie because he liked the way the potato had crisped there. They knew… Everything about him and treated him as a different person. The same way Archie did but… Different. There was a different kind of love there from Dewi compared to the platonic brotherly love and appreciation he got from Archie. They adored Caleb for who he was and, for the first time since they’d gotten together, in two years, he had finally come to realise this. Dewi loved him for being Caleb Cole and nothing else… And that, made something in him writhe.