unbreak my heart ;

[ PHILLIPA ROSSI, SHE/HER, CIS WOMAN, NATASHA LIU BORDIZZO ] is a THIRTY year old NURSE from PROSPER, WV. They are GIVING and KIND but also TIMID and WITHDRAWN. She reminds me of oversized sweaters, worn leather satchels, handmade soaps, and pressed flowers.

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“That’s ‘cause I’d give a dog a much cooler name, like—Sledgehammer or Reaper,” Taru started, his grin cutting, metaphorically side-stepping Pippa’s question for a second. Though the thought of a dog that looked like Kiko answering to a name like Siege or Beast was laughable. And besides, he never thought of himself as a dog person. His grandma once had a bird. A cockatiel, he was pretty sure, named Peppermint. Taru would sit on the faded overstuffed armchair in his grandparents’ living room, on his knees, and peek into her cage as she twittered about. Hina at the kitchen table with her back perfectly straight as she helped sort the mail or whatever, Minoru on the floor watching Richie Rich or Fraggle Rock. Peppermint was able to mimic bits and pieces from the theme songs of both shows.

After his grandma died, Peppermint started tearing out the feathers on her stomach and slowly stopped eating. And one day, the cage was empty. His grandpa had given her away, he said. Taru wondered if Earl had just snapped its neck like he would a chicken. Taru thought he could’ve taken pretty good care of Peppermint if he had been given the chance. “But my ex named her. You remember Steph Kent?” Steph was studious and serious and kind of mean in high school. And in a school that small, he figured they crossed paths.

West Virginia University. Seemed far away despite being well within state lines. “College parties sound like hell anyway,” he said dismissively. Most parties were hell actually. With too many people and the wrong kind of music, he’d always find himself in a corner with a beer as both Steph and Randy darted around making actual conversation. He snorted a laugh as she continued. “But a soft blanket and ice cream… Well now, who could ask for more? Staunch chocolate guy, myself,” he said wryly but with some genuine amusement. He tried to imagine it, tried to imagine taking steps out of Lockhorn and into a new kind of life. It was easy to see it for Pippa: poised and kind and smart. His brain recoiled at the thought of himself in that position, for more than one reason. It wasn’t like it was what he ever wanted. “But what I’m gettin’ is that college is about as mind-numbin’ and full of shit as I always thought,” he continued, the second half not something she offered up evidence of but what he still firmly believed anyway. He thought about how she mentioned working and actually felt curious enough to ask about it. “What kinda job you’d do? Said you worked.”

Hush you. Taru smiled, then stopped. He reached up to rub his palm against the center of his chest for a couple seconds, then dropped it to grip the steering wheel again. He and Pippa never talked all that much about anything more than the practicalities of wiping the trail of caked blood from his temple. They knew each other in the way that everyone seemed to know one another, then she moved next door at the tail-end of high school, and then she was gone again. He didn’t know why her laughter meant anything to him. His brow furrowed a second. “How far’s your cousin’s place from work?” he asked, tapping his thumb against the leather beneath it. “Sounds like a shit deal.”

What do you think I should get? she asked him. Nothing that’ll rip holes in my pocket. Taru let out a low, disappointed whistle. “Damn. I was gonna suggest we go in search of that hot pink Miata. Sounded like that’s what you’re secretly gunnin’ for.” He haphazardly knocked his hand against the indicator and turned right onto South Fayette Street. Slower than he’d usually take it as he thought. It sounded like Pippa needed something that would just get her from one place to another with minimal issues. “But yeah, lotta Fords do fit the bill,” he continued and lifted his right hand to count off on his fingers. “Versatile, practical, economical.” He paused, then added drolly: “Soulless.” He knew a guy in Beckley who was selling an ‘83 Ford Fiesta for cheap about a month ago. Taru wondered if someone took it off his hands yet. “But if you can’t drive stick that really limits me here.”

-

“Steph Kent?” It took Pippa a moment but a face eventually came to mind. “Oh yeah, I know her.” They never ran in the same circles but her sharp mind had quite the reputation. Especially in a school as small as theirs. A sort of relentless intelligence that couldn’t be ignored. Admirable, really. “I had no idea you guys were together,” she admitted. Then again, that shouldn’t be a surprise to anyone. It wasn’t like Pippa paid much mind to anything outside Matt and their circle back then. She and Tyler may have known each other but it wasn’t like they were friends. Friendly, maybe. But it would be dishonest to claim they were anything more than that. 

Her mouth curved upwards into a smile. “A timeless choice. Though I’m more a vanilla girl myself.” In more ways than one, much to her dismay. Pippa resisted the urge to roll her eyes at her own predictability. “It’s... not for everyone.” After her years pursuing higher education, she could definitely admit that. “But it’s also what you make of it. I’m sure other people had a more enjoyable experience than I did.” To her, college wasn’t a time of self-discovery full memories to cherish. It was a stepping stone to get what she actually wanted. She was sure if there was less pressure on her shoulders, she might have enjoyed college as much as Matt did. 

What kinda job you’d do? Said you worked. “I did a few things. I started with on-campus job opportunities. You know, Data Entry Clerk within the academic departments. I was Library Assistant for a while. Then later, I tutored. Sometimes I’d pick up a shift for a friend at one of the diners near school. Towards the end, I worked part time as a patient care technician. Really helped with the line of work I wanted to get into.” Listing it all out, it was no wonder why Pippa didn’t have much fun at college. She was always on the go. When she wasn’t, she was studying. Whatever time she had between that was split between recovering from the load she took on and Matt. “Riveting, right?” She said after a beat at her own expense.

“Not too far,” Pippa answered after thinking about it for a bit. “Maybe 10 or 15 minutes? Dom works at the Old Forge Sheriff’s Department.” He was the only one of her cousins who still lived in Lockhorn County. Not married. No kids keeping him here either. He just loved the place and couldn’t think of anywhere better to be. “It’s not an ideal situation but it’s what’s working right now. Once I get that car, I’m sure it’ll be a lot better.”

…

it was rare that josie had some free time without her toddle by her side, but when she did have those moments to breathe and be alone, she found herself missing him anyways. or more honestly, she was missing john. but she tried to not think about that too much. it was easier to push those thoughts away. thankfully, she was pulled from her thoughts before they were able to take root when she heard her name being called by a familiar voice. she turned to see pippa walking over to her and an easy, friendly smile pulled on her face. “hey, how’s it going?” she greeted, unsure if their one run in at the bar was enough to ignore years of no contact to have a more friendly greeting. but josie was never the most friendly person to start. “oh, is everything okay?” she asked, assuming something bad had happened to prompted pippa wanting to talk to her, always a pessimist. 

-

“It’s going...” Pippa’s voice wandered, contemplating her answer for a moment. “...alright? I suppose? I can’t say I have anything to complain about.” She pushed out a breathy chuckle through smiling lips. It took her a moment to grasp that, but wow, she had nothing to complain about. Her life wasn’t by any means perfect or anything like she imagined it’d be but it was steady. And not to jinx herself but tentatively on the up-and-up. It wasn’t plagued with so heavily grief anymore. She had woken up today and thought of the things she was looking forward to rather than the things she didn’t have. It was quite nice to realize that. Pippa’s warm smile widened. “Oh, everything’s fine,” she assured with a wave of her hand. “It’s actually... pretty exciting, maybe? I guess it depends on what you find exciting.” She chuckled sheepishly before moving on. “I’ve been meaning to talk to you because I wanted to invite you to something.” She dug through her purse then, pulling out a flyer and handing it to Jo. “I’m starting a class. At the Community Center. I’ve been taking on a lot of new hobbies lately and I thought it’d be nice to share one of the ones I’m better at with a few people if they were interested. It’s for crocheting? Not the most exciting art form there is out there but it might be worth a try if you’re looking to dip your foot into something new. And obviously, I’d love to see more of you.” She gave a sheepish half grin. “Would you be free to sit through a boring ol’ crochet class for me this Saturday? You know, in the name of Huntin’ High Cheer?” Was that manipulative? To bring up the fact that they used to be on the cheer team together? Pippa didn’t mean for it to be. She just thought it’d be a nice reference to how close they were in school – a closeness Pippa hoped they could slowly work there way back to since she’d be residing in Lockhorn County for the foreseeable future.

—

Banks hadn’t made it on a truck that day, being assigned some of the grunt work around the station instead of tackling a call with the rest of the guys on the same shift as him. He took it without a complaint, even if it felt like it didn’t matter how much he was going to bust his ass there — he was only ever going to be seen as the juvenile delinquent that he was. Even if the records were sealed, it was written all over his face every single day that he looked in the mirror. It left him with time on his hands that were perpetually dirty, but less of a chance to get into trouble by the time the exhaustion set in on his way home. Still, there were times like today when he wanted to do more than clean up around the station and pick up the messes that were left behind by the others ( he could do that at home ). So when he heard a voice call out from the front, his hands were full of one of the boxes that he had been in the process of moving into one of the storage spaces in the back but turned towards the sound. “Can I help you?” They didn’t look like they were in need of any emergency assistance, which was good since most of the rest of the others were out on calls and left only him. “I’ve got to warn you though, if you have a kitten stuck in a tree — they took all the ladders with them.”

-

The voice startled Pippa. She jumped back, nearly dropping the flyers she held in her arms as she clutched at her chest. Coming to find that it was just young Banks Rainer, the tension in her body eased. “Banks,” she said his name in a relieved breath. “Hey there.” Pippa pushed her lips into a smile. I’ve got to warn you though, if you have a kitten stuck in a tree — they took all the ladders with them. She let out a laugh, nodding her head at his particular brand of humor before she spoke. “Well, lucky for me I don’t have any kittens stuck in a tree. I’m just here to talk actually. Or share?” That felt like a more appropriate term. To make more sense of her word choice, she plucked a flyer from the stack she was carrying and held one out to Banks. “I was wondering if I could post up some flyers here. If you boys have some kind of bulletin board.” She tucked some of her hair behind her ear – a nervous tick – before she spoke again. “I’m teaching a crochet class at the Community Center this Saturday. And I know it’s not the most macho thing in the world but it’s a real good hobby to have when you want to pass the time, which I’m sure you boys try to do in between fires... I’d love if you could come. And you know, obviously, any of the other fellas here who might be interested and can make it. Do you think you could spread the word? And maybe let me stick some of these up around the station?” She gestured to the flyers in her arms. “I promise I won’t cover your walls with them. Just one or two here and there.” 

-

They couldn’t help the way their smile spread and another soft chuckle tumbled from their lips at the reveal that Pippa was named for Phil Hill. They couldn’t remember if they actually knew who that was, maybe knowing the name from talk at the bar but not a whole lot about him specifically. “ Well, was ol’ Phil at least pretty good at racing? ‘Cause that could be a little bit of a brag– but if he sucked, ” They finished their statement with a suck of their teeth, looking back over at her with grin spreading on their features. If their tone wasn’t obvious enough, they hoped their grin made it clear they were only teasing. Not like anyone would be able to guess that was how Phillipa got her name. Koda never would have. They considered it for a moment, generally not on the Ginny train due to the feminine nature of the name– until Pippa said Gin. “ Now hold on, I kinda like that, ” They said, easily considering the idea without the chance of being annoyed by jokes. “ Gin. ” They repeated, “ Is it too late to take back all the things I said about the name Virginia? I think I’m comin’ around to it. ”

Dakota’s a very pretty name too, by the way. And I’m not just saying that. Koda’s head dipped for a second, attempting to hide the bashful smile that tugged at their features for a moment before they looked back to her. “ That’s kind of you to say. ” They said, their tone toeing the line between jestful and genuine. As Pippa seemed to become flustered by their requested they chuckled softly again. But what she said next– whether she meant it or not– did catch Koda off guard a little bit. Because, yes, obviously they would love for Pippa to make them dinner. It immediately sent their brain on a spiral of little images that were so far removed from the life they lived. But, it was sort of just a figure of speech, wasn’t it. She probably didn’t mean it. Even if she did remember them, she probably didn’t mean it. They smiled gently as they handed off items in their hands, “ You don’t have to do nothin’ like that– I swear I don’t mind. Cross my heart. ” They assured, lifting a hand to draw small cross over their heart with their finger. That gentle teasing reaming to their tone. But they did feel the need to say something else. About her mother. If they remembered drunken ramblings, they remembered her mother being unwell. “ I’m sorry to hear about your momma though, ” They said, looking at her for a second longer, sympathetic– before they looked away again. This time down as they turned key in ignition and truck came to life around them. 

-

Pippa laughed a little. “Well, if we’re going off what my dad used to tell me then he was the American driver to win the Formula One Championship, which...” She made a face. “I guess is pretty impressive? I don’t know. I was never a car person no matter how much he tried to teach me about all of it. I’d always rather be off doing something else.” Though considering her father’s unexpected passing when she was just seventeen, she wished she could go back in time and plant herself in front of her daddy whenever he started going on about cars. Instead of running to spend time with Matt and their old crew. If she knew then what she knew now, she’d glue her eyes on him and take in every word he said, commit it to memory. Lord, she missed him. Tears threatened to prick at her eyes if she lingered on the thought too long. She was thankful Koda was so funny, making her laugh when she so felt like shedding a tear.

“You are far too kind,” Pippa said with a slight shake of her head. Maybe dinner was a bit much for someone you just met. Maybe paying a visit to The Windy Shot would be much better. Give her a hefty tip. Regardless of what Koda told her, Pippa felt the need to repay the kindness she offered. I’m sorry to hear about your momma though. The condolence made her breath feel caught in her throat. She wasn’t expecting it, especially since it’s been years since her momma passed. Well, three. But people tended to stop caring after the first. “Yeah... uh, you’d think it’d get easier after having lost one parent before but uh... it doesn’t. Surprisingly.” In fact, it probably hurt more. Because now she was totally alone. She didn’t even have Matt anymore. 

.

I’m so proud of you. Clem blushed, both flattered and a little overwhelmed by the statement even said in passing. It wasn’t that no one ever said it to her before. Her mamma held Clem’s face in her hands once in a while and said it slow like she wanted Clem to really hear the words. To believe them. Her daddy told her she was smart or that she was a big help around the house. He looked pleased when Clem got all no-nonsense or when she said something a little judgy about a neighbor or some folk from over in Hazzard he didn’t like. He never mentioned pride. “I had some mighty big shoes to fill,” she said. “I had to step up my game. Though I’ve got a few people on the team, so I can’t take all the credit.” Much as she wanted to. “And now Vanessa Hendricks is interested in joining, too. She’s just turned fourteen. Got her doing some Mamma’s helper jobs, sort of a trial run…” She trailed off in her ramble, then nodded when Pippa turned toward instruction. She was grateful to feel useful. Clem looked from one table and then the next, then nodded once again. “I like the sound of it. It’ll look nice,” she said and moved to stand on the far side of the table on the left, ready to push it toward the other. 

Do you think twelve pairs of hooks is presumptuous? Clem smiled slightly and shrugged one shoulder. “I believe in the power of manifestation. Setting intentions, and working hard on them,” she started. “If you’re fixing to bring twelve sets of hooks, twelve people’ll eventually come. Just have to have the faith and keep plugging away.” It occurred to her belatedly that it sounded very Field of Dreams. If you build it, they will come. But still, it was an old belief in her family. She just hoped Pippa didn’t think it sounded hokey. “How many people have you talked to about it? When I wanted to take the babysitting business more seriously, I realized flyers were real handy but sometimes you get the best results talking to people one-on-one. Then they know your face, hear your spiel.” Clem started to push the table. It let out a short little squeaking sound as it dragged across the floor. “I cornered more than one mom at the Family Dollar, believe you me. Not ashamed to admit it.” And I do have the time. For you? Always. Her smile widened. “You been to the Cracker Barrel since you got back? Their coffee’s gotten a little better if you ask me. Tastes less like dishwater, anyhow.”

-

Sheepishness swept through Pippa at the compliment but she moved past it quickly. “Well, it sounds like you’ve got the beginnings of an empire well underway. I’m very excited for you. How’s your momma these days anyway? Haven’t had a opportunity to run into her.” She crossed over to other table, positioning herself on one side and ready to give it a push to meet Clem’s table halfway. “On three? 1...2...” She pressed the piece of furniture forward on 3, hearing it groan against the floor of the community center before it met with the table Clem manned. 

I believe in the power of manifestation. Setting intentions, and working hard on them. Like a vision board? Pippa almost wanted to ask but didn’t for fear of coming off ignorant or condescending. Instead she nodded her head slowly, listening and letting herself find assurance in Clem’s words. If you’re fixing to bring twelve sets of hooks, twelve people’ll eventually come. Just have to have the faith and keep plugging away. It was a very hopeful process but Pippa wanted to commit to it. It seemed far better than worrying herself silly.  “A handful of people. Some ladies outside the salon. Some girls from the hospital. I told my cousin about it and gave him some flyers to share with the folks over at the police department. And I, uh,” she chuckled. “I actually went by the fire department to spread the word. Figured they would appreciate learning something they could do in their downtime in between waiting for fires. So hopefully something comes from it. Fingers crossed.”

-

The grin remained on Koda’s features, effortlessly charmed by Pippa’s nature. The way she smiled, the way she spoke, the way she laughed a little at herself. “ Don’t beat yourself up over it, I don’t think many people look at someone and go, oh, that’s a Dakota. Nickname or otherwise. ” They allowed with a smile, meaning that, again, Dakota wasn’t a necessarily common name. Or, they’d never met or even heard of anyone else called Dakota. “ Someone told me once it means friend. I dunno if I reckon that’s true but it’s sort of neat. ” They chuckled lightly as they reached their truck. Freeing hand once again, this time to retrieve keys attached to their belt loop by carabiner. Unlocking the truck while balancing groceries against their chest, another chuckle escaping at the reveal of West and Virginia. “ Oh man, see? That’s what I’m sayin’– I got off lucky with Dakota. I was probably this close to bein’ a Ginny too. ” They held up their thumb and forefinger once they had opened the truck door, looking across the enclosed space at Pippa on the other side with amusement. 

Philippa. Jeez. It was a nice name, a really nice name. The sort of name that made Koda think she wasn’t meant to be here. Not in Lockhorn. She was supposed to be somewhere nice, somewhere befitting of such a name. “ It’s a pretty name– not that Pippa isn’t. Pippa’s pretty too. ” They didn’t know why they needed Pippa to know that the name she’d chosen to introduce herself with was pretty to, but they did. “ But I like it. Philippa. ” The repeated the name, soft smile pulling up the corners of their lips. Allowing a beat, they found themself wondering if it was so wrong that they were enjoying this second meeting? Was it so wrong for them to enjoy meeting her all over again when she had no idea? “ You ‘right if I hand these to you? Not sure you want me drivin’ one handed. ” They joked, interrupting their own thoughts with a grin returning to their features.  

-

“Friend. I like that. I don’t know what Phillipa means... hopefully something as nice as ‘friend’. All I know is that my dad named me after this racecar driver he liked. Phil Hill.” Pippa made a face at the name. She imagined Phil Hill’s parents didn’t like him all that much to make his name rhyme like that. Pippa let out a small laugh at the reveal that Dakota was probably thisclose to being a Ginny, smiling at the bartender from the other side of the truck. “I could see you as a ‘Ginny’. Yeah, people could call you ‘Gin’. You’ll probably get loads of people at the bar making puns named that. Could be very irritating but could also earn a lot of tips.” She chuckled.

At the compliment, Pippa made a face, feeling sheepish. “Yeah? Well, thanks. Dakota’s a very pretty name too, by the way. And I’m not just saying that.” She meant it. She’d never met a Dakota before. She liked that the name was a bit long and had 3 syllables like hers, and she liked the way all of the syllables sounded together. Her eyes widened when Koda mentioned the groceries, so taken by the conversation that she completely blanked on the fact that the bartender couldn’t very well drive with all of that in her hands. “Oh gosh – yeah. Sorry. Yes. I will take those. Hold on–” She pulled open the door on her side and helped herself in. Once seated, she set what groceries she was holding down on her lap and held her arms out for Koda to pass on what of the haul she was carrying.  “Gosh, I’m probably going to have to make you dinner after all of this. First you offer me a ride home and then I forget you can’t drive with groceries in your hands? If my momma were still alive, she’d’ve banished me to a corner to think about what I’ve done, forgetting my manners.”

.

“Yeah? Well, you’ve seen one more than I have,” Taru noted, leaning against the door he just closed behind the dog as he spoke, hands tucked into the pockets of his worn leather jacket. It was a warm night. He wouldn’t need to wear it long, but he often found he would anyway. Stubbornness or stupidity: take your pick. “Guess there’s one where the big monkey’s got its own kid. Big white gorilla baby—named Kiko. Ingenious,” he said sardonically. Ki-Ko, King Kong. Wonders never ceased. He tilted his head toward the dog in the backseat. “That’s her name.” He lifted his hands in a show of innocence. “And I had nothin’ to do with it. Just thought you oughtta know if you’re gonna be sharin’ a small space with each other. One of those things society demands, I think.”

A gentleman, thank you. He grinned dangerously and closed the door behind her. The window was open and he gripped the edge, then shifted onto his elbows to lean in and reply. “How long’s it been? Years of nothin’ to catch you up on. Reckon that’ll have the opposite effect we’re lookin’ for here.” He pressed his tongue against the inside of his cheek. “Didn’t you go to some fancy college?” He’d rather pull his teeth out than know too much about academia, but he’d prefer to ask about what took Pippa away from Lockhorn than stand there and lay out what kept him there. Taru didn’t usually care much about what people thought about him, but he hated the moments when he thought lowly about himself. He wasn’t a teenager anymore; he’d grown out of that shit, or he was supposed to. “Sounds like it’d be borin’ as hell. Maybe you should tell me how you survived it. Should be rivetin’.”

He paused a moment there, looking at her sitting in his car, and then suddenly tapped the edge with his palm and straightened to make his way around to the other side. He dropped himself into his seat with little to no finesse, not unlike how he threw himself onto the barstool back in the Windy Shot. He shut the door firmly behind him, and Kiko let out a disgruntled huff from the backseat in protest of the loud noise. He scoffed a laugh without meaning to. A hot pink Miata. He stuck the key into the ignition, then pressed down on the clutch with his left foot. Taru glanced over at Pippa as he stepped down on the break, then turned the key in the ignition. The car roared to life beneath them, half-wheeze and groan.

He was making a face the moment she said before you make a face. “Sensible.” He said it like it left a bitter taste in his mouth, like how he’d say licorice or politics or Northstar V8 Engine. He sunk a good chunk of his savings into the glorified heap of junk they now sat in, but he’d rather that than something sensible. “Thank shit you got rid of it,” he continued, looking away as he shifted the car’s gear and pulled away from the curb. “I’d be too embarrassed to be seen with you if you hadn’t.” Did you want to make sure my oil and tire pressure levels were good? To see if my, uh… transmission fluid needs changing? “Fuck off,” he said almost-cheerfully. “Didn’t you know? You can tell a lot about a person by the car they drive. Gotta be an awful practical person, Rossi, with your little Ford Taurus. You replacin’ it anytime soon?” He paused, then ribbed: “Maybe a Saturn?”

-

“Kiko...” Pippa repeated, nodding her head as she let the knew knowledge Tyler just shared with her settle in her head. “That’s cute.” Just thought you oughtta know if you’re gonna be sharin’ a small space with each other. One of those things society demands, I think. Pippa chuckled, helpless against finding Tyler’s brand of humor effortlessly amusing. “Who named her exactly?” She asked curiously. “Since you’re so against the idea of it being you,” she teased with a small laugh.

Didn’t you go to some fancy college? Pippa pressed her lips together. “I went to WVU, yes...” It wasn’t something she liked to talk about. Especially since she was aware not a lot of people from here had the means to attend college in the first place. Talking about her experience with higher education made her feel... pompous, even if she didn’t intend to be. She always tried to discuss it quickly and vaguely whenever someone brought it up. Maybe you should tell me how you survived it. Should be rivetin’  "Ha – well, I barely did if I’m gonna honest with you. I hardly remember much of it outside of studying and working. I think I went to about... 3 parties? During my time there. And I barely wanted to go to them at that.” She sighed. God, Tyler must have thought she was so boring. But it was a very taxing to study Nursing on top of working to help pay for her other needs. “My only solace those four years was a very soft blanket to wrap myself in at night and ice cream. I know all of the Ben and Jerry flavors intimately. I swear I think the only reason the Freshman Fifteen didn’t hit me was because all the walking I had to do,” she said with a dry laugh.

Pippa never thought she could be fond of the way someone told her to fuck off but Tyler was proved her wrong. It pulled a hearty laugh out of her, pride swelling in her chest that she drew such a reaction out of him seeing as he was a mechanic himself. She also liked how the skin of his cheeks pulled when he was amused, revealing dips on either side of his face. God, was she staring? She should stop that. You replacin’ it anytime soon? Maybe a Saturn? Pippa rolled her eyes at his ribbing. If she were more comfortable with him, she might have told him to fuck off (in jest, of course) right then but their budding friendship was simply far too new, regardless of all of those nights she used to patch him up when they were younger. “Hush you,” she settled for instead, chiding him fondly. “But yeah, I think I am. Right now, my cousin drives me to work whenever I have a shift but our schedules don’t always line up as of late so it’s definitely something I have to look into. I’ve just been biking on the days he can’t take me and after being on my feet all day, I gotta tell ya: it’s not the most exciting trip home.” She chuckled.

.

You always know the neatest things. It was impossible not to preen at the comment. If there was anything Clem liked more than being told she was bright or creative or sensible, it was the implication from someone like Pippa (a college educated woman who had lived outside Lockhorn and had an established career) that she was smart. Or, at the very least, well-informed—which was, of course, what she always aimed to be. Someone didn’t spend as much time in the library as she did without some purpose. She wanted so badly to poke at that statement, to have Pippa say it again. Or to maybe say something even more complimentary. She remembered when she was a kid and Pippa came over to babysit, the way she’d lay out all the books she’d read since she last saw her out on the kitchen table. Tuck Everlasting, Tales of a Fourth Grade Nothing, Anne of Green Gables. An unspoken look, see, don’t you think I’ve done good? Don’t you think I’m as clever and pretty and interesting as you? 

Clem exhaled a quiet laugh and nodded once. “Makes perfect sense,” she said. “Though you’ll have a hard time fitting my head through the door once I’ve mastered the coaster. Or—God, can you imagine when I’ve gone and done a little blanket? I’ll be insufferable, you’ll want to bar me from the building entirely.” She continued to smile lightly as Pippa spoke, ready to answer the question about Faith Wilding when what Pippa continued with struck the smile frozen on her face. Clem shook herself out of it. “Well, the book’s from… ‘94, I think? If I’m remembering right. And it said she had an exhibition scheduled at a museum in Boston. A sort-of-recreation of the Womb Room.” A girls trip across state lines. It sounded as amazing as it did impossible. “It’d be amazing to see it, but—I don’t know. Busy, busy, busy. Y’know?” She shrugged it off, then looked toward the supplies Pippa put down on the table. “So what do you need me to do? I’m in your service for the whole afternoon if you’d like.” She paused. “And I was actually thinking… We could grab a coffee after we’ve got things set up? If you have the time. Maybe put up a couple flyers on the way.”

-

Pippa let out a good-natured laugh, positively amused by Clem. “I would never,” she said through her giggles despite it not being necessary. She listened intently as the other woman spoke about Faith Wilding and her scheduled exhibition in Boston. A recreation of the Womb Room! The news of it made Pippa perk up, feeling as though things aligned just so that she and Clem could see it. But then: Busy, busy, busy. Y’know? Pippa’s lips slanted but she nodded in understanding. That’s adulthood for you. “I get it. You’re kind of a big deal around here now, huh? From being baby sat to being the babysitter.” She giggled. “I’m so proud of you,” she said casually as she ruffled through the materials in her basket. At Clem’s question, Pippa recalled the task at hand. “Right. Well, I was thinking we push these two tables together so it makes one big square and lay out some cloth over it–” Just so it looked pretty. “–and then set up some chairs all around. I got 12 pairs of hooks–” She gestured to them in the basket. “I figure we lay a pair in front of each seat along with a ball of yarn? Or two?” Twelve felt like a very eager number. Would 12 people even show up? The question was written across Pippa’s face. “Do you think twelve pairs of hooks is presumptuous?” She couldn’t help but ask. It would be so embarrassing to prepare this much for only one or two people to attend on the day.

-

Koda chuckled again, that same sort of soft chuckle that was key in laughing with someone and not at them. The smile lingering easily on their features. They liked the way she spoke, the way she attempted to hit the joke back over the net at them. And they liked the way it didn’t quite flow. “ Oh wow, double bagging, ” They nodded their head like they were impressed, “ I like it, that’s prepared, or– you know, it could have been. ” They teased gently. 

They forced themself to keep their cool, even as they felt their heart beat a little faster in their chest as they nodded. Assuring that they were more than willing to give her a lift. It’s familiar– not with Pippa, they’d had a couple drinks that night, but still it was familiar. And it made them nervous, not a feeling they liked to admit they ever had. They chuckled a little when she did, glancing down for a moment for a small reprieve before back up again. “ Well, there’s times to be brave but I don’t think this has to be one of them. ” They said. It would definitely be out of their way, if Pippa lived where she used to or not. They were here for groceries themself and they hadn’t even stepped foot in the Family Dollar. Didn’t matter, it’d still be open later. “ It’s probably not outta my way if you were gonna walk, ” They pointed out good natured-ly, nodding their head back towards their truck before they started to move in that direction. “ C’mon, don’t want the milk gettin’ warm in the sun. ”

“ Dakota, ” They answered with ease as they walked back towards their truck. Being called Dakota didn’t bother them, Koda was just quick and in the rural speak of Lockhorn County, it tended to end up being d‘koda anyway unless you were trying to make a point like Darby Briar. “ Which I guess is still pretty different for around these parts. ” They conceded, “ I just count myself lucky I didn’t get stuck with Virginia or somethin’. ” They joked, looking over at her again with that easy smile of their’s. They were probably just as lucky they didn’t end up with any other state for a name, or whatever else had been rattling around their mama’s head 24 years ago. “ What about Pippa? That short for somethin’ too? ”

-

“Really? Gosh, okay... thank you,” Pippa said, truly appreciating Koda’s generosity as she followed her to her truck. She’d have to find a way to her repay Koda for this kindness. Maybe pass by the Windy Shot again some time soon and leave a hefty tip if she was working. “Dakota,” she echoed the name, shaking her head at herself for not piecing it together from the nickname that was revealed to her. “Koda, Dakota, that makes a lot of sense. Can’t believe I couldn’t figure that one out.” She started to chuckle but then it quickly grew into a laugh when Koda said she was lucky she didn’t get stuck with ‘Virginia’. “Yeah, that’s a bit on the nose. Just slightly, just a teensy bit,” she said, obviously joking. “You know, back when I used to go to Huntin’ High, my senior year Chem partner was a guy named ‘West’ and he had a little sister named ‘Ginny’. Didn’t think anything of it for the longest time. It wasn’t until graduation that I found out that ‘Ginny’ was actually short for Virginia.” A quick pause to let that big reveal sink in. “Their parents literally named them West and Virginia. My mind? Was blown.” She laughed a little again. “Talk about loving where you’re from.”

“Phillipa,” Pippa answered, flashing a smile at Koda. “Yeah, it’s a bit of a mouthful so Pippa happened. Back when I was a teenager, I used to hate it. Made me feel like I was still a kid that no one took seriously. But then you get older, you get busy and realize you don’t really have the time for all of those syllables, so... I really like Pippa now.” She laughed softly at her admission.