andrew saying he doesn’t wish neil on anyone who isn’t a mortician was peak comedy of him
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andrew saying he doesn’t wish neil on anyone who isn’t a mortician was peak comedy of him

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addendum: if the cheeto dies this year I'll give yall an andrew pov story in celebration
neil josten and Andrew minyard show what happens when an unstoppable force meets an immovable object and the answer is they fuck
book 3, chapter 1
“how did you get into writing” girl nobody gets into writing. writing shows up one day at your door and gets into you
"how did you get into writing" girl i've been tormented by the visions since i was eight years old

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aaron minyard is SUCH a sarcastic little shit sometimes:
“Looks like you’ve managed to completely embarrass yourself in both languages.”
Neil answered by upending his glass onto the floor. “That’s mature,” Aaron said. Neil threw the glass at him.
“Do you take your cues from dead men?”
“Did you know about Andrew and Neil?" "Careful," Andrew said, but Aaron slid his gaze back to Dobson. ... "I'm sorry, Aaron, but if you could be a little more specific?" "Sure," Aaron said, and elaborated, "Did you know Andrew's fucking Neil?”
"Would you like to talk about Neil today?" "No," Andrew said, as Aaron said, "Yes.”
"Says the man dating a mafioso." "I'm not dating him." "Liar."
"I like Neil's promise ring, by the way."
“His father's people tore up his arms with a lighter and knives, and none of it is going to fade. He doesn't need to see those." "Matching set," Aaron said. "Very cute.”
"Go slash some tires, or whatever it is you do for fun."
“Exy this, Exy that, get a fucking hobby already. Oh, but I guess he did?”
"You must be on some fantastic drugs."
if he and andrew actually got along sometimes they'd be absolutely unstoppable i love them
take one and pass it around
I don’t have ‘headcanons’ I just Know and Understand
book 3, chapter 1
it’s always, “andrew wasn’t fast enough to save neil a second time”, and never, “andrew, with a broken collarbone and limp hand, dragged himself to neil and choked his attacker before she could reach him again.”
the definition of “if I couldn’t walk, I’d crawl to you.”

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andreil's cigarette-only conversations in TKM are peak chaotic genius and unquestionably the best thing ever. because wdym andrew gazes at him longingly for an 'eternity', props his cigarette between his lips, yanks neil's head toward him then blows smoke STRAIGHT into his face
just for neil to snatch it like an angry raccoon right out of andrew's mouth, snap it in half and fling it to the ground while andrew just watches the halves roll away in SILENCE i love them so much
can't forget that other time when neil casually strolls up to andrew on the roof and steals his cigarette yet again. naturally andrew has to blow smoke in neil's face. neil flicks ash at him and silently threatens to stub the cigarette out. andrew just pinches his wrist and steals the cigarette back. and then they start from the middle of a conversation like NOTHING HAPPENED and they didn't just wage a five-minute war over nicotine
sometimes andreil's way of communicating is on a different level altogether because these freaks just do the most random things to one another and they ALWAYS involve cigarettes. why does nobody talk about this they are so ridiculously iconic
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Andrew: here’s a key to the house, to my car, to my heart
Neil: here’s my soul, my secrets, my whole life story in one panic attack
Both: 😐
neil josten and Andrew minyard show what happens when an unstoppable force meets an immovable object and the answer is they fuck
Two cats resting.

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biblically accurate jean moreau
i’m in an international class rn and a girl is from marseille should i ask her if she knows jean moreau