it’s not that i’m innocent or gullible or stupid. it’s not that i’m naive and don’t know how the world works, thinking how it would be better if, in short, capitalism doesn’t exist, and businessmen aren’t so greedy, and they shouldn’t be in control of everything. it’s that i don’t really wanna know more than that. if i delve deeper, if i connect things with logic and learn how things “must” be this way or else there’d be an economic collapse or whatever, or how countries, even the better, first world ones, are in an impossible amount of debt (who the fuck are they owing it to?), or how, despite his morals or his orangeness and whatever, he was a good businessman, even better than the other recent ones. fuck all that. people are fucking suffering. i am angry. i don’t wanna be angrier, knowing i’m useless, i have no power, because i’m a woman of color in a third world country. why should i have the knowledge if i can’t do anything with it anyway? what i know is the effects of it. because i feel it. i see people around me, and the viral news sometimes, recent or not, though some may be fake, feel it. i see, know, feel its impact, directly or second or third-hand. and really that’s enough for me

hirl dinner