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@pigultimate
oink oink snff hhf huuok nöff grunt snf snff snff oink hhhkff snff

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WELL. Let us focus on some of the BETTER and NEW and NOT OLD things. Like these peaches. (He slams the basket down on the wooden kitchen table.) You ready to make lunch, then? We can use this for a jam, cookies to go with 'em, some stew or something... (💿)
You really have to emphasize it not being old, huh? Do you have any old things up your sleeves, Tommy?
And surely. Jam and cookies sounds nice. As for stew… I’m not sure if I can make something out of that using peaches. I could ask your mum but hmm… I’m trying not to rely on her too much when it comes to this. Unless, you’re familiar with cooking? I highly doubt it, however.
Oldest thing up MY sleeve is my love of the GRIND! (I grin widely and give you a thumbs up.)
And well... Phil. Mr. Craft. I meant that we use OTHER ingredients for the stew. Honestly, peach stew, the fuck would we even do with that? (I chuckle and begin searching your cabinets.) For your information, too, I know quite a bit of cooking. Don't live alone without learning at least some.
Oh. That… makes more sense, surely. (I ruffle your hair as you search my cabinets.) Maybe I really AM getting old one way or another. (I walk over the tea shelves.) Techno was looking for some tea, so I’m going to be bringing tea alongside the food.
Speaking of, since you’ve mentioned you know quite a bit of cooking, why not cook us stew? I have yet to taste your cooking. (I pause a bit) There it is, the tea Tech requested. Do you have any personal requests that maybe I have a stash of?
Uhmm... (I look away and grimace.) Maybe we could have sweet tea, or something, too? It is pretty hot, if you aren't in the fuckin' tundra.
And I can cook us stew, but I need... Things. Like carrots, and stock, and BEEF, lots of beef. (I slam a large pot onto the stove and pause.) Potatoes too, I guess. (I roll my eyes at the thought.)
That’s the point though, isn’t it? Regardless of where you are, the point of drinking tea is to drink it hot. We can make yours cold if you’re not a fan of it so much, but I believe it’ll taste different. (I start looking at the tea shelves once more.) I’ll prepare them cold for you. Would that be okay? (I smile a bit and I take the tea out.) Got it. I’ll prepare the jam and the cookies now.
And as for the ingredients, I’m complete with those. Just look over the pantry near the one you just scavenged. (I point to the direction of the said pantry.)
... Do you know what sweet tea is? I can show you how to make it. New tea, eh? (I waggle my brows obnoxiously.)
Hm... You need more of everything, Phil. Truly. (I begin to rummage the pantry, slowly beginning to cradle a variety of vegetables.) ... Salad too? Sides? Dessert?
Phil. I've never planned a picnic to this degree before. The pressure, the - (I throw a hand to my forehead dramatically and grin.) The pressure is getting to me!
You can show me after you’re done with that, mister. (I point at the large pot and squint my eyes a bit.) And I know how to make sweet tea. Why are you asking me out of all people?
And don’t be overdramatic, Tommy. (I cross my arms and shaking my head while trying not to laugh.) It’s just a picnic. We can do it. We already have the desserts jotted down. Sides and salad are easy to plan.
You’ve had bigger plans than picnics. Get it together. (I pinch your cheek.)
(i duck through the door frame into phil's kitchen)
hullooo i see you're already cooking up a storm in here... i'm on chopping duty as usual right?
(i cross the kitchen to where i know phil always keeps his cutting boards grabbing one for raw meat and one for everything else)
been awhile since we all cooked together i'm glad we made the kitchen big enough that we won't be stepping on each other's toes or something
(grabing two knives i know are perfectly sharpened since i'm the one who crafted them i then wash my hands my station now fully set up and ready to help)
chat shut up about 4/4 whatever that means
(Wilbur follows behind Techno, stepping into the kitchen.)
So... Phil's making the drinks and jam, Tommy's got the cooker, God help us... Tech's chopping... ...Looks like I'll be baking. Here's hoping I can remember from when I did this with Niki... (He gets out all of the ingredients from the fridge and pantry, squeezing past Tommy and Techno multiple times in the process, since the kitchen was starting to get cramped.) Two bowls, butter, sugar, eggs, salt, uhhh... Oh, flour.
(He sighs, cracking two eggs into the bowl, then adding a stick and a half of butter. He also adds half a cup of sugar, and starts beating it together. In the other bowl, he mixes the flour and salt.) (He seems kind of winded.)
How the... the fuck did Niki do this all day?
(I got startled a bit, breaking away from my zoned self from doing what I was doing.) Oh, sorry boys, I seemed to have zoned in too much to notice you. I’m glad you’re back home.
Good to know you still remember what your stations are, yeah? Thank you for chopping as per usual, Tech. (I fondly smile at Technoblade’s direction.)
As for you, Wilbur… (I drop what I’m doing and I look at Wilbur in confusion, tilting my head and putting one hand on my waist.) You DO know there’s a mixer over there, right? (I point at the pantry where the mixer is located.) Are you not familiar with baking? If so, we can change errands. You can take care of drinks and jam. I’m sure you know how to make tea by now, at least? Let me know if you have any difficulties or in need of any assistance. (I walk over to Wilbur’s direction and gives him a short pet, then goes to the pantry where the mixer is.)
No, no, it’s alright. I want to bake. I used to enjoy it, really. Did a lot of it with Niki in L'Manberg.
Mm?- (Wilbur briefly closes his eyes at Phil’s petting of his head. But then he quickly resumes insisting.)
Phiiiiiiil….. I can do it just fine. Don’t worry about me. (He goes over to the pantry where Phil was headed, spotting the mixer and grabbing for it.)
(“Besides, I hate making tea.” he thinks to himself.)
Oh- (I get startled at Wilbur grabbing the mixer ahead of me and steps back a bit to face him.) Are you absolutely certain? (I look at Wilbur with concern, but did not further insist.) If you’re sure, I’ll let you be. Again, let me know if you need anything. (I pat Wilbur’s shoulder and go back to where I was, trying to not feel too much from it… grimace? A pang of pain? I never knew, but it somehow made me feel a bit rejected, but did not say anything further.)
OI! Phil! (He tugs on Phil's sleeve with the tips of his fingers.)
I don't have much to do while I wait for this stew. Can you give me something to do, please, this is a - new level of hell. Who's in charge of the salad? (I clasped my hands together in front of me.) How about that?
…Oh- (As he slowly got out of his spaced out state after Tommy tug him, Philza gently pet Tommy’s head and sadly smiled at him.) Sure, you can do that. Thank you so much for helping our and doing majority of the help. I’ll entrust you with the salad also. Let me know if you also need help. I’ll go back to fixing the drinks and jams. (Phil puts his hand away and starts resuming his work, feeling a bit more cheered up after Tommy approached him.)
(i listen contently to the familiar noise of my sounder humming a bit to myself as I peel carrots but pause both as i tune into the mixer scuffle watching quietly trying to think of something to say until it seemed to be resolved)
so.... uh
(i begin roughly chopping the carrots)
i meant to come find you earlier phil you did a good job taking care of the animals while i was away as usual but thank you still
(i totally wince because of chat screaming 'aww's and not from embarrassment as i shove the chopped carrots into a bowl and move on to other vegetables for the stew)
*cough* ANYWAY... we gotta harvest crops soon too before the next snow storm
(i grunt lowly as i do actually wince from the volume and chaos from chat having to put down the knife hoping it wasn't to noticeable)
(He glances at Tech for a moment and stops what he was doing.) No need to thank me, mate. (He gets back to what he was doing, almost done finishing making the jam, smiling to himself.) It’s a shared responsibility, after all.
And we definitely need to do that very soon. Maybe a day or two after this? (He silently taps his foot while working in glee.) There we go. How does this look like? (He shows the jam he’s made, quite unsure if he did it right.) Want to give it a taste, boys?
still want to make sure you know it's appreciated i'm sure they all enjoyed your attention too
(i grab out my phone hoping some distraction will settle the voices my ears perking a bit when i hear phil speak again)
hm? sure let's see if it taste as good as it looks
(i put my phone down now that i felt my headache fading i grab a spoon and plod over taking a taste of the jam)
*snort* seems fine to me but I know some people would like it sweeter either way it's good
(i smile and give a thumbs up before heading back over to begin chopping the beef)
looking out phils window and i can see baba rolling around in the snow very cute
Deplar Farms
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wintertag
I want to commit arson
Never really think about how the cold effects my scars and joints until just before a big snow storm definitely can sense it coming with these bad boys
Winter Tea Time.
WELL. Let us focus on some of the BETTER and NEW and NOT OLD things. Like these peaches. (He slams the basket down on the wooden kitchen table.) You ready to make lunch, then? We can use this for a jam, cookies to go with 'em, some stew or something... (💿)
You really have to emphasize it not being old, huh? Do you have any old things up your sleeves, Tommy?
And surely. Jam and cookies sounds nice. As for stew… I’m not sure if I can make something out of that using peaches. I could ask your mum but hmm… I’m trying not to rely on her too much when it comes to this. Unless, you’re familiar with cooking? I highly doubt it, however.
Oldest thing up MY sleeve is my love of the GRIND! (I grin widely and give you a thumbs up.)
And well... Phil. Mr. Craft. I meant that we use OTHER ingredients for the stew. Honestly, peach stew, the fuck would we even do with that? (I chuckle and begin searching your cabinets.) For your information, too, I know quite a bit of cooking. Don't live alone without learning at least some.
Oh. That… makes more sense, surely. (I ruffle your hair as you search my cabinets.) Maybe I really AM getting old one way or another. (I walk over the tea shelves.) Techno was looking for some tea, so I’m going to be bringing tea alongside the food.
Speaking of, since you’ve mentioned you know quite a bit of cooking, why not cook us stew? I have yet to taste your cooking. (I pause a bit) There it is, the tea Tech requested. Do you have any personal requests that maybe I have a stash of?
Uhmm... (I look away and grimace.) Maybe we could have sweet tea, or something, too? It is pretty hot, if you aren't in the fuckin' tundra.
And I can cook us stew, but I need... Things. Like carrots, and stock, and BEEF, lots of beef. (I slam a large pot onto the stove and pause.) Potatoes too, I guess. (I roll my eyes at the thought.)
That’s the point though, isn’t it? Regardless of where you are, the point of drinking tea is to drink it hot. We can make yours cold if you’re not a fan of it so much, but I believe it’ll taste different. (I start looking at the tea shelves once more.) I’ll prepare them cold for you. Would that be okay? (I smile a bit and I take the tea out.) Got it. I’ll prepare the jam and the cookies now.
And as for the ingredients, I’m complete with those. Just look over the pantry near the one you just scavenged. (I point to the direction of the said pantry.)
... Do you know what sweet tea is? I can show you how to make it. New tea, eh? (I waggle my brows obnoxiously.)
Hm... You need more of everything, Phil. Truly. (I begin to rummage the pantry, slowly beginning to cradle a variety of vegetables.) ... Salad too? Sides? Dessert?
Phil. I've never planned a picnic to this degree before. The pressure, the - (I throw a hand to my forehead dramatically and grin.) The pressure is getting to me!
You can show me after you’re done with that, mister. (I point at the large pot and squint my eyes a bit.) And I know how to make sweet tea. Why are you asking me out of all people?
And don’t be overdramatic, Tommy. (I cross my arms and shaking my head while trying not to laugh.) It’s just a picnic. We can do it. We already have the desserts jotted down. Sides and salad are easy to plan.
You’ve had bigger plans than picnics. Get it together. (I pinch your cheek.)
(i duck through the door frame into phil's kitchen)
hullooo i see you're already cooking up a storm in here... i'm on chopping duty as usual right?
(i cross the kitchen to where i know phil always keeps his cutting boards grabbing one for raw meat and one for everything else)
been awhile since we all cooked together i'm glad we made the kitchen big enough that we won't be stepping on each other's toes or something
(grabing two knives i know are perfectly sharpened since i'm the one who crafted them i then wash my hands my station now fully set up and ready to help)
chat shut up about 4/4 whatever that means
(Wilbur follows behind Techno, stepping into the kitchen.)
So... Phil's making the drinks and jam, Tommy's got the cooker, God help us... Tech's chopping... ...Looks like I'll be baking. Here's hoping I can remember from when I did this with Niki... (He gets out all of the ingredients from the fridge and pantry, squeezing past Tommy and Techno multiple times in the process, since the kitchen was starting to get cramped.) Two bowls, butter, sugar, eggs, salt, uhhh... Oh, flour.
(He sighs, cracking two eggs into the bowl, then adding a stick and a half of butter. He also adds half a cup of sugar, and starts beating it together. In the other bowl, he mixes the flour and salt.) (He seems kind of winded.)
How the... the fuck did Niki do this all day?
(I got startled a bit, breaking away from my zoned self from doing what I was doing.) Oh, sorry boys, I seemed to have zoned in too much to notice you. I’m glad you’re back home.
Good to know you still remember what your stations are, yeah? Thank you for chopping as per usual, Tech. (I fondly smile at Technoblade’s direction.)
As for you, Wilbur… (I drop what I’m doing and I look at Wilbur in confusion, tilting my head and putting one hand on my waist.) You DO know there’s a mixer over there, right? (I point at the pantry where the mixer is located.) Are you not familiar with baking? If so, we can change errands. You can take care of drinks and jam. I’m sure you know how to make tea by now, at least? Let me know if you have any difficulties or in need of any assistance. (I walk over to Wilbur’s direction and gives him a short pet, then goes to the pantry where the mixer is.)
No, no, it’s alright. I want to bake. I used to enjoy it, really. Did a lot of it with Niki in L'Manberg.
Mm?- (Wilbur briefly closes his eyes at Phil’s petting of his head. But then he quickly resumes insisting.)
Phiiiiiiil….. I can do it just fine. Don’t worry about me. (He goes over to the pantry where Phil was headed, spotting the mixer and grabbing for it.)
(“Besides, I hate making tea.” he thinks to himself.)
Oh- (I get startled at Wilbur grabbing the mixer ahead of me and steps back a bit to face him.) Are you absolutely certain? (I look at Wilbur with concern, but did not further insist.) If you’re sure, I’ll let you be. Again, let me know if you need anything. (I pat Wilbur’s shoulder and go back to where I was, trying to not feel too much from it… grimace? A pang of pain? I never knew, but it somehow made me feel a bit rejected, but did not say anything further.)
OI! Phil! (He tugs on Phil's sleeve with the tips of his fingers.)
I don't have much to do while I wait for this stew. Can you give me something to do, please, this is a - new level of hell. Who's in charge of the salad? (I clasped my hands together in front of me.) How about that?
…Oh- (As he slowly got out of his spaced out state after Tommy tug him, Philza gently pet Tommy’s head and sadly smiled at him.) Sure, you can do that. Thank you so much for helping our and doing majority of the help. I’ll entrust you with the salad also. Let me know if you also need help. I’ll go back to fixing the drinks and jams. (Phil puts his hand away and starts resuming his work, feeling a bit more cheered up after Tommy approached him.)
(i listen contently to the familiar noise of my sounder humming a bit to myself as I peel carrots but pause both as i tune into the mixer scuffle watching quietly trying to think of something to say until it seemed to be resolved)
so.... uh
(i begin roughly chopping the carrots)
i meant to come find you earlier phil you did a good job taking care of the animals while i was away as usual but thank you still
(i totally wince because of chat screaming 'aww's and not from embarrassment as i shove the chopped carrots into a bowl and move on to other vegetables for the stew)
*cough* ANYWAY... we gotta harvest crops soon too before the next snow storm
(i grunt lowly as i do actually wince from the volume and chaos from chat having to put down the knife hoping it wasn't to noticeable)

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oink oink snff hhf huuok nöff grunt snf snff snff oink hhhkff snff
Is this a selfie of yours, Tech? Why is your nose close to the camera? Need any help with taking photos? I can’t see well…
sniffing you
snfff snof snff hhhhkf oink snorf hfff sfff snfk snff
Smelly
WELL. Let us focus on some of the BETTER and NEW and NOT OLD things. Like these peaches. (He slams the basket down on the wooden kitchen table.) You ready to make lunch, then? We can use this for a jam, cookies to go with 'em, some stew or something... (💿)
You really have to emphasize it not being old, huh? Do you have any old things up your sleeves, Tommy?
And surely. Jam and cookies sounds nice. As for stew… I’m not sure if I can make something out of that using peaches. I could ask your mum but hmm… I’m trying not to rely on her too much when it comes to this. Unless, you’re familiar with cooking? I highly doubt it, however.
Oldest thing up MY sleeve is my love of the GRIND! (I grin widely and give you a thumbs up.)
And well... Phil. Mr. Craft. I meant that we use OTHER ingredients for the stew. Honestly, peach stew, the fuck would we even do with that? (I chuckle and begin searching your cabinets.) For your information, too, I know quite a bit of cooking. Don't live alone without learning at least some.
Oh. That… makes more sense, surely. (I ruffle your hair as you search my cabinets.) Maybe I really AM getting old one way or another. (I walk over the tea shelves.) Techno was looking for some tea, so I’m going to be bringing tea alongside the food.
Speaking of, since you’ve mentioned you know quite a bit of cooking, why not cook us stew? I have yet to taste your cooking. (I pause a bit) There it is, the tea Tech requested. Do you have any personal requests that maybe I have a stash of?
Uhmm... (I look away and grimace.) Maybe we could have sweet tea, or something, too? It is pretty hot, if you aren't in the fuckin' tundra.
And I can cook us stew, but I need... Things. Like carrots, and stock, and BEEF, lots of beef. (I slam a large pot onto the stove and pause.) Potatoes too, I guess. (I roll my eyes at the thought.)
That’s the point though, isn’t it? Regardless of where you are, the point of drinking tea is to drink it hot. We can make yours cold if you’re not a fan of it so much, but I believe it’ll taste different. (I start looking at the tea shelves once more.) I’ll prepare them cold for you. Would that be okay? (I smile a bit and I take the tea out.) Got it. I’ll prepare the jam and the cookies now.
And as for the ingredients, I’m complete with those. Just look over the pantry near the one you just scavenged. (I point to the direction of the said pantry.)
... Do you know what sweet tea is? I can show you how to make it. New tea, eh? (I waggle my brows obnoxiously.)
Hm... You need more of everything, Phil. Truly. (I begin to rummage the pantry, slowly beginning to cradle a variety of vegetables.) ... Salad too? Sides? Dessert?
Phil. I've never planned a picnic to this degree before. The pressure, the - (I throw a hand to my forehead dramatically and grin.) The pressure is getting to me!
You can show me after you’re done with that, mister. (I point at the large pot and squint my eyes a bit.) And I know how to make sweet tea. Why are you asking me out of all people?
And don’t be overdramatic, Tommy. (I cross my arms and shaking my head while trying not to laugh.) It’s just a picnic. We can do it. We already have the desserts jotted down. Sides and salad are easy to plan.
You’ve had bigger plans than picnics. Get it together. (I pinch your cheek.)
(i duck through the door frame into phil's kitchen)
hullooo i see you're already cooking up a storm in here... i'm on chopping duty as usual right?
(i cross the kitchen to where i know phil always keeps his cutting boards grabbing one for raw meat and one for everything else)
been awhile since we all cooked together i'm glad we made the kitchen big enough that we won't be stepping on each other's toes or something
(grabing two knives i know are perfectly sharpened since i'm the one who crafted them i then wash my hands my station now fully set up and ready to help)
chat shut up about 4/4 whatever that means
A picnic? Really now?
...
I suppose If I have nothing better to do, I'll come along. Provided you don't mean in the tundra. This snow's fucking dreadful.
Of course not in the tundra, it'd be cold as balls. We could go more toward my house maybe - it's nice and sunny and beautiful.
Maybe you both could find a spot while Phil and I cook shit up?
Your "house"? The mound of dirt surrounded by those ugly walls? Honestly, Tommy. I think I'd lose my appetite. There's a grassy hill by L'Manhole, y'know. It's a good place to watch the sunrise. Or sunset, as it were.
EX-FUCKING-SCUSE ME, BITCH! I'll have YOU know that those lovely walls are the only FUCKIN' thing protecting me from a genuine INSANE PERSON!
Just for that - potatoes in your stew. Yeah. Yeah how about that.
Maybe that'll teach you to insult the only withstanding house on this server. (He mumbled)
i thought the potatoes were a given in a stew
but no it wouldn't be in the tundra even i wouldn't enjoy the cold that long was thinking somewhere near my old base nice neutral place
but we can workshop that a bit later do you two need any help cooking?
We SURELY need it. We’d be cooking quite a lot, and we could use extra hands.
And I honestly don’t understand what got into Wilbur thinking it’d be in the tundra. (I pinch my temples.)
Come now, Tech and Wil. both of you need to help us.
I mean, I haven't seen either you or Techno leave the tundra in ages. (Except for... He pauses a bit awkwardly, thinking about the New L'Manberg memories from Ghostbur.) Then again, I haven't seen a lot in ages. Anyway, no fucking potatoes, please, Christ. Unless you want me to hurl into the pot. How the fuck do you still like them, Tech?
potatoes are a staple of my diet and i'll never get tired of em i bet i could eat over 500 million potatoes and still want more
but fiiine we can sub out the potatoes
and i leave the cabin all time i only just got back home a little bit ago totally not home all the time
Found this bear in the tundra days ago. I didn’t know how to communicate well nor was I familiar of Tumblr until today.
Is this bear one of yours? @pigultimate
phil.... you do know i only have polar bears right? why did you get that close to it
......
do you think its still out there? i could use another bear
I do, that’s why I asked if you decided to change your mind and got a different kind of bear. Y’know, to spice things up a bit.
And I was exploring for resources. The usual, and I found it close to where we resided in, so I wondered if you owned the said bear.
As for its whereabouts, I’m not sure if it’s still there. I’ve been meaning to send you that for quite a while now. Hence, why I’m unsure if it’s still there. You can check it out for yourself if you’d like.
i'll keep an eye out for it now that chat won't shut up about the new bear and who gets to name it
it does look like it's friendly enough to tame anyway

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i could dig out the old picnic kit if we wanna make an event out of it if we can find a decent spot to set up that is
heh not everyone is as good at keeping in heat like me
If you can do that, we’d gladly appreciate it as always, Tech. I trust you to find the best spots, after all.
A picnic? Really now?
...
I suppose If I have nothing better to do, I'll come along. Provided you don't mean in the tundra. This snow's fucking dreadful.
Of course not in the tundra, it'd be cold as balls. We could go more toward my house maybe - it's nice and sunny and beautiful.
Maybe you both could find a spot while Phil and I cook shit up?
Your "house"? The mound of dirt surrounded by those ugly walls? Honestly, Tommy. I think I'd lose my appetite. There's a grassy hill by L'Manhole, y'know. It's a good place to watch the sunrise. Or sunset, as it were.
EX-FUCKING-SCUSE ME, BITCH! I'll have YOU know that those lovely walls are the only FUCKIN' thing protecting me from a genuine INSANE PERSON!
Just for that - potatoes in your stew. Yeah. Yeah how about that.
Maybe that'll teach you to insult the only withstanding house on this server. (He mumbled)
i thought the potatoes were a given in a stew
but no it wouldn't be in the tundra even i wouldn't enjoy the cold that long was thinking somewhere near my old base nice neutral place
but we can workshop that a bit later do you two need any help cooking?
Found this bear in the tundra days ago. I didn’t know how to communicate well nor was I familiar of Tumblr until today.
Is this bear one of yours? @pigultimate
phil.... you do know i only have polar bears right? why did you get that close to it
......
do you think its still out there? i could use another bear