saturated sunrise ;

rose listens to him, noticing his facial expression and the way he says those things.  ‘ it isn’t easy for you, is it? ’ she asks quietly as she looks at him, frowning slightly.  ‘ so… basically every time you go out, everything is perfectly staged? it’s all planned out? that’s fucking insane… ’ she mutters and shook her head at the thought of that. it seems completely crazy to her and the more she things about it, the worse she feels for him because of this.  ‘ that’s not right… i get that looking good is your job and all but… you’re only human too. you’re allowed to have days where you don’t look your best. though, whatever you say, i’m sure even then you’re still handsome as hell. ’ yeah, she won’t change her mind about that one. she’s convinced for him it’s actually impossible to look bad. his next words make her chuckle slightly before she gives him a rather innocent look along with a shrug of her shoulders.  ‘ i take pride in that, sorry. ’ as amusing as she finds that, at the end of the day she knows she can be horrible sometimes but as can he as well, she figures in a way it’s simply who they are which is nothing they can exactly help even if they wanted to. her eyes widen for a small moment before she frowns at him. it’s needless to say that his words are more than confusing as well as surprising to her. she would’ve never expected to hear something like that from him, the guy who wanted to stop her from writing those articles so badly, to actually suggest for her to keep writing them.  ‘ that’s fucking stupid, james. ’ she points out and shakes her head once again.  ‘ whatever i used to write in those articles… i just.. i can’t write something i don’t agree with. i can’t make up stories about things that aren’t true… not anymore. not when i have gotten to know how you’re really like. ’ it would feel so wrong to write about him when she was starting to feel all this things for him, things she sometimes still tried to ignore but were obviously there. it wouldn’t feel right and she can’t write something that doesn’t feel right.  ‘ not going to happen. she’ll have to live with the articles i give her. they’re just as good. ’ a small smile appears on her brims before she softly kisses him back, moving closer to him again as she does so.  ‘ who tells me it will be better at the next place? imagine my boss is great but what use is it if no one cares about what i write? the situation could be much worse, it’s alright. i’m fine. ’ she tries to assure him, pressing a quick kiss to his lips again. sure, sometimes she does wish she situation was different and better but you can’t have everything you want, right? quick enough her own lips form into a smirk and she playfully rolls her eyes at his words.  ‘ well, i can’t disagree with the fun part. it was a lot of fun and i’m actually a little sad we can’t do it anytime soon again but just think how your manager would like it if we were caught at one of your photoshoots. ’ she gives as an example, the smirk now having turned into a small grin.  ‘ i wouldn’t quite say that. i don’t know how many girls you see when you’re not with me so who knows whether i was right or not about that. ’ she teases right back, grin still right where it was before as she looks at him. his next words make it vanish quickly enough though. she’s looking away from him again, chewing on the inside of her cheek.  ‘ tell me about it… i’d be in a lot of shit over this. but no one is going to find out about this. ’ or at least she hopes so.

rose feels like she just heard the biggest load of bullshit ever and she just can’t help but laugh at his statement. nothing about that seems true to her at all. plus, she has seen him in the morning quite a few times now but she’s not going to point that out. ‘ you’re fucking joking, right? ’ she questions, raising a brow at him. he clearly had to be joking with that.  ‘ i’ve seen a lot of pictures of you, james. i’ve seen probably the most unflattering pictures most people will never got to see because paps exclusively old them to us and we chose not to publish them… but those unflattering pictures — they can’t even be considered that because, well, you still looked way too good. ’ and as much as she hates to admit that, it’s just nothing but the truth. by now she was convinced it was actually impossible for him to not look good, no matter what kind of moment he was in. “oh, it is… sometimes i just like to take a break from that goal. guess today is one of those days. ’ she points out to him with a small chuckle rolling past her lips. she sighs at his next words, because in a way she knows he was right with what he just said even if he’s very unaware of that and was probably just joking.  ‘ well… i guess it might as well actually be about the articles i wrote about you and she’s not happy i quit… they were popular. ’ she mutters quietly, chewing on the inside of her cheek. there was no way she could continue doing that though. how could she with everything that has happened between them the past few weeks? things have changed, the way she looked at him changed. frankly, she simply has to admit that she was wrong about him.  ‘ and finding a new job isn’t an option. sure, i have connections but i do like that job a lot. i like where it’s taken me, i like how far i’ve come, how i’ve developed in my time there… just because i have a shit boss doesn’t mean i should quit there and find something new. at least she lets me write what i want even if she treats me like shit sometimes. i don’t get that freedom everywhere, you know? ’ in fact, maybe rose was a little scared of the thought of quitting her job there and trying to find another job. her current success doesn’t mean it’ll continue when she’s writing for another magazine. she could become irrelevant very fast. she chuckles at his last few words though, rolling her eyes in a playful way.  ‘ yeah, she better not find out about that ever. not her or anyone. hell would break lose. ’ fucking at her office that one time really had been a risky move, one that was more than worth it though. the way they kiss in that moment, it was different from the times they kissed before. there’s something about it she can’t quite pin point but it was different, she knows that much. different and she likes it a lot, likes how it feels.  ‘ oh, i’m not as bad huh? ’ she mutters against his lips, grinning a little.  ‘ guess you aren’t as bad as i always like to say either. at least alright enough to spend my time with. ’ she shrugs, giving his lips a small peck.  ‘ i never thought i’d ever say something like that to you, let alone be here with you right now. ’ she points out quietly, letting out a small laugh.  ‘ it’s a little crazy. ’

when he tells her about how he’s been running on only two hours of sleep that seemed absolutely insane to rose. she wasn’t sure how he was doing it, especially knowing he probably does this all the time, definitely has to due to his job.  ‘ i’d die with that little sleep… i mean, i can do with it sometimes but i’m in such a bad mood when i’m running on little sleep. how do you do it and still look so damn good all the damn fucking time? ’ and even though the tone of her voice indicates that she is teasing, she is also dead serious about that because it’s not exactly a secret that he looks illegally good all the time. his good looks also aren’t exactly helping anything at all in the situation she was in with him. a small smile creeps onto her lips though as she feels his fingertips on the skin of her hips though. there was something extremely relaxing about his touch in that moment, something she wasn’t complaining about at all. she can’t help but chuckle once again when he talks about her boss. he surely was right about the things he says but it was a little amusing for her to hear it from him. still, she is surprised that he tells her he doesn’t really mind her rants. she can’t even explain why that surprises her, it simply does.  ‘ well… just don’t wanna annoy you, that’s all. ’ she mutters, shrugging her shoulders a little as she looks at him with a small smile.  ‘ she does really think she’s the shit though. it’s been alright until recently actually… she’s not happy with my articles, saying my writing sucks and all. i don’t know what her problem is really but it’s getting annoying. it seems like when she has a bad day, i have to pay for it and i’m so tired of it. and i think telling her about you wouldn’t exactly help the case, babe but thank you for the suggestion. ’ she chuckles and looks at him with a grin playing on her brims. she lets out a soft breath as she feels his hand on the small of her back, the other brushing some of her hair back, causing her to close her eyes for a small moment before opening them again. his words cause her to smile and without hesitation she kisses him back, her hand resting on his chest.  ‘ just making sure… would’ve been a little disappointed if you had wanted me to leave now. i like being here with you right now. ’ she whispers before kissing him again. she actually can’t believe she just admitted that to him but frankly, it was nothing but the truth. she’s happy around him, usually feels better about herself and her entire day as crazy as that might seem.

it has honestly just come to the point where rose is no longer sure what even is going on between them. it started as a one night stand, but well it couldn’t be classified as that the moment they slept together for the second time and then obviously it became a regular thing and she still isn’t sure how to feel about that especially when now they’re starting to hang out without any sex involved. she knows this means there are some sort of feelings involved but the thought of that scares her way too much so she continuously just pushes that away.  ‘ fair enough, guess i can’t blame you for that. ’ she chuckles and truth be told, she couldn’t especially given the fact that this was supposed to be just sex but it seems like it’s obvious to both of them by now that it isn’t just that and neither of them seem to care too much. she is actually about to comment on what he says, but he’s quicker to speak again so all she does is chuckle once more, just nodding her head as she looks at him.  ‘ well… in that case you must be really exhausted then, huh? ’ she points out, once again frowning a little. as james asks her that question though, she just sighs and shakes her head, looking away from him for a moment.  ‘ yeah, guess you could. ’ she whispers, biting down on her lower lip as she shrugs her shoulders.  ‘ but i am okay. you know, it’s just been a really stressful day at work. like.. really stressful. my boss is going crazy these days and while some people might use sex as a stress relief, it just doesn’t sound too appealing to me right now. it’s just… it’s been awful with her lately, she’s not happy with anything i do, always criticizing me and it just sucks. but i’m ranting now, and i doubt you actually want to hear about this stupid shit. ’ she mutters, giving him a small smile.  ‘ so anyway… you just asked me if i’d leave. the question is, do you want me to leave? ’ personally, she really doesn’t want to leave at all. she won’t mind spending time with him without having sex at all, in fact she’ll like it because being with him gives her some sort of comfort, but she isn’t sure if he really wants her to leave.  ‘ cause… you know, if you don’t want me to stay i can leave. ’

to her, james definitely could be compared to nicotine. undeniably she was addicted to nicotine and no matter how hard she tried to quit smoking eventually the addiction got the best of her and she reached for a cigarette again, no matter how well she knew how bad nicotine was for her. with james, it was exactly the same. she knows how bad she is for her, that she needs to stay away from him and tries over and over again but she ends up seeing him again. she wasnt proud of it, sure as hell not but it’s like she has no control over it. deep down, yeah it was something she really couldnt admit not even to herself, she does enjoy spending time with him and she can’t deny that she possibly has already used sex as an excuse to simply spend some time with him. she has grown way too attached to him, to the guy she still sometimes claims to hate. that is complete bullshit though and it’s exactly why she is with him in that very moment. a smile forms on her lips as she feels his arms around her and a soft kiss being pressed to her jaw. ‘ yeah, i’m totally going to leave now. ’ was her immediate answer to his question but she’s grinning which gives her away. yeah, maybe if this was really only sex she should mind but she absolutely doesn’t. ‘ no, i won’t leave just because you’re not in the mood for sex, babe. ’ she says softly and looking at him with a small smile playing on her lips. ‘ i might not really be in the mood right now either so i think we’re good. ’ she nods, pressing a soft kiss against his lips for a short moment before she pulls away. rose was now frowning a little as she looks at him. ‘ are you okay though? ’ she asks him, letting her fingers run through his hair. ‘ i mean, you not being in the mood for sex is a little worrisome, i’d say. ’ she chuckles and shrugs her shoulders.

onyxsuited:

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