counting days.

named PHOEBE MARIE CHANG, but call her PHEEBS. born & raised in dallas, texas, but moved to phoenix at the age of three. she’s THIRTY-EIGHT years of age, this EX-STRIPPER is now a MARRIAGE COUNSELLOR. 

-

She couldn’t relate to life slowing, or changing - not recently. Leeor knew if she’d danced professional like she was suppose to, she’d be retired from ballet by now. Her life would take the turn everyone’s did, slowing down, more stable. She’d probably be a teacher like her mom was, continuing to fill her days with ballet until she was no longer able to do that. Then life would further slow, leading her to only talk about the glory days from a chair. That’s how life was suppose to go. Now she was nearing 35, then 40, with no really indication of when she’d stop stripping or escorting. Many people in her life, mostly the men, clued her in on what she should be doing - anything else, only deepening her stubbornness to keep going. “Well, maybe I just feel bored.” Leeor admitted, legs swinging. “Bored of me, maybe.” 

Leeor often felt like she was piecing her feelings together as she spoke them aloud. She rarely let herself feel much of anything, so admitting something usually meant coming to terms with it in the moment. “I’m not trying to sound depressing, but it feels like there isn’t much left to look forward to.” She’d kind of given up on the idea of being in a relationship or having kids. 

.

       Arching a brow in the others direction, Phoebe tried her best to grasp the words leaving red stained lips. Bored of herself? Maybe the older woman couldn’t quite get it-- her life was always throwing things at her, bumps in the road, or curveballs flying towards her face. She never thought she’d be some marriage counsellor. Hell, she never thought she’d lose her husband or her child, yet there she was. Never had she’d seen herself walking away from the life she used to leave; the dancing, the paid dates, all of it. But, then it changed-- it was always changing. She was tired of the change. Maybe Leeor needed the change.

      “Out with the old, in with the new, babe.” Rather than allowing her own dark and sad thoughts to cloud her mind all over again, Phoebe did her best, tried anyway, to make the situation and conversation a little bit lighter. “Maybe you need to make a lifestyle change, a friend change... Maybe you need a new hair-do. Something... I’m looking for an assistant. You could always come work with me.” The woman said with a laugh. She could only imagine the two of them, working on the relationship troubles of others.

               “So, was that all talk before then?” A chuckle sounded from Charlie, his dark eyes venturing to find where the cue ball had flown off the table and rolled to. “Why’d you bother challenging me?” With a shake of his head, he turned away from the table with his arms crossed in front of him, eyes still searching. Ok, maybe they hadn’t exactly challenged, but they’d gone from a drink or two to talking about playing once a table opened up. Charlie wasn’t some pool shark, he did know his way around a billiard table and enjoyed playing when the opportunity arose. Mostly for the company and that chat, even if every now and again he won some decent scores of cash. Especially now though, it was a good distraction from all that was going on in his head. It also kept him from sitting and slinging back drink after drink at the bar. “I’m feeling kind today, once we find the cue ball, you wanna try again?”

location: anywhere they can play pool!

with: @phxstarters​

.

       Maybe it was the alcohol, liquid courage as she liked to call it; or as most people liked to call it. Though the liquid seemed to clouding her vision rather than making her better. She didn’t go out much, not since those days, but something in her was calling for her. Which seemingly lead to conversation, now a game of pool. “I don’t know,” She stated honestly, giving the brunette a shrug of her shoulder before resting her pool stick at her side and reaching for her drink. Hazel hues watched the man the entirety of the time, making a face as she lifted her drink to her lips. After taking a sip, she exhaled dramatically, “You know, if all you’re gonna do is make fun of me, that cue ball might find your head next.” Was she a sore loser? Hell yes. “Where’s a pin-ball machine when you need one?”

…

“Serious and not serious at the same time” Kiraz spoke to Phoebe avoiding talking about one’s own mother breathing deep. It was inevitable  that she would eventually have to talk about her and the tragedy that accompanied the most recent memories of her. Hearing however Phoebe speak of her own mother it made her smile and that was indeed a rarity for her at the moment. A genuine smile Kiraz had missed on her face. It was enough she almost wanted to call Monica, Moe, Lola, Wyatt or Toni to tell them her face had cracked. Maybe she’d just go to Lola’s and eat cake later. There were other names attached to her thought but their lives were bound to each others and trying erase the foolish display she’d made was hard. “Do you ever get the feeling Phoebe that you just get kicked when you’re down? You’re mother is an incredibly wise woman to say that. What about you, we both seemed a little off. Nothing too serious I hope as well on your part.”

.

      Did she ever feel like she was being kicked when down? More times than not. She found the blows her absentee father left to the death of both her husband and chid was like a constant kick to the gut. The two came one after the other, and truthfully, Phoebe felt like she didn’t have time to grieve either incidents. Taking a deep breath, the brunette forced a smile as she slowly nodded her head, “Sometimes,” She began. How did she make it sound easy when it was so obvious she was struggling herself? “But, I just keep telling myself there’s a light somewhere at the end of the tunnel,” Or there had to be. Each kick only made her stronger. “If I keep fighting to stand, and keep trying, I’ll be okay.” And slowly, day by day, it was becoming a little bit easier. When came the question of her own wellbeing, Phoebe merely shook her head with a humorous laugh, “I need a vacation.” Or a day off, even. But even those didn’t feel long enough. “Somewhere exotic, with a nice beach and some water, maybe?”

“For what?” He asked, glancing over in the direction of the woman who now had her back to them, “Giving her the same dirty look, or for eavesdropping?” He’d finished, as his blue hues fell back upon Pheebs. “Because I can’t say either of them would rank you up on that list.” God, if either of those made her a bad person, he was further up on the list of those going to hell then he thought. “Might make you a little nosy, but who the hell isn’t?” He assured, “Also, don’t have personal calls with people in public places, those around you are gonna listen in.” That was human nature, if nothing else. “If anything, it’s a disservice when you’re trying to figure out who’s side you’re on, since you’re only getting one side of the story.” Then again, wasn’t that how life truly was. Everyone had their side, but most of the time, you only got one half of it. “How’s Phoebe today, other then trying to solve someone else’s problem as per usual.”

.

     The brunette hadn’t noticed the way the younger woman shot them a sideway glance, though it happened to Phoebe often when she found herself eavesdropping. If ever confronted, she merely told people she was zoning out, living in her own little world. “Thanks, I appreciate that.” She muttered, her words ending on a quiet laugh. “You know, people should be thankful I don’t run some gossip blog for the town, because the amount of drama I could spill.” And the lawsuits she could imagine. The idea-- no longer a thought. “It’s one of the reasons why I tell people both of them need to be in a session.” So she could understand both parties, see the whole picture and really understand what and where everything went wrong. When the conversation turned to her, the smile on her lips somewhat faltered for a moment before brightening, the woman shrugging her shoulders, “I’m alright. I can’t really complain,” Not that anyone was listening, and the person who was-- she paid. “What about you? Anything fun happening in your world?” 

~

                    Ha! Wasn’t that ironic? Divorce wasn’t on the horizon for her, and yet, suddenly Abby grew green with envy. She wondered if Phoebe even picked up on itl. “Too bad you couldn’t save my day.” It was a humorless joke that came with taking a gobble out of the muffin that she had stolen off the counter after paying and waiting for her latte to arrive at her table of choice. She was kidding, of course, it was just a little funny to her. Abby’s eyes trailed on over to where Phoebe pointed to, a young woman whispering into her speaker, but rather whisper yelling, something that she had perfected the art of. The caffeine eventually arrived and Abby grinned at the steam that radiated off of hers, even when it was a near one hundred and two outside. “Should I go slip her your card?” Her eyelid dipped in a wink. “I can be your personal reference.”

.

     Fuck. Instantly, regret filled her eyes as she studied the woman she considered her friend, and slowly she ate her words. “Well-- y’know, sometimes that happens. Sometimes,” How did she save this without completely wanting to flee the scene like she committed a crime? “Right person, wrong time.” Maybe they could reconnect? Who knew. Truthfully, was there any point to her job when she didn’t even have a marriage of her own. Considering all things. Phoebe was thankful when their orders slid in front of them casually, taking the tension out of the conversation and refocusing it back to what it was. “I appreciate that, Abbs, I really do. Buuuut, I’m pretty booked up right now.” She said it with a tone of humour, but if anyone knew anything, it was a casual way of saying I’m overloaded and tired.

“I would suggest perhaps going into divorce – especially in this town.” Everyone he knew was either divorced or was going through the process of it, so as he saw it she was really missing out on the jackpot that this town had to offer. As someone that had just managed to process his and see his wife leave the town without even a good bye he started to see what everyone else had. Perhaps this was him seeing the so called light at the end of the tunnel. Clearly, the two of them had been long over – more like she was long gone and he had finally caught up. He nodded as he pinched his nose bridge as the smallest smile appeared on his face an instant reaction to her contagious laugh, “I wouldn’t do that. But perhaps there is a reason as to why cupid doesn’t run around naked with arrows anymore – you need to work on your art if you want help love be alive in this town. – have you already gotten lunch?” he figured being social was a start at the right direction after everything.

.

        Phoebe, as much as she wanted to say she wanted to help in the love department, she wasn’t entirely sure how much she believed in it. Everyone she had ever loved left her-- or died. Which in turn, caused her heart to shatter, shut down even. Her world turned dark, and the point became unknown. Her job became her life after that--  That, and her cat, Chester. Maybe holding out for hope in seeing other people rekindling their romance was what had her going. Unfortunately, it appeared she hadn’t done any justice in helping her friends. Then again--- the ex, well, Pheebs wouldn’t say she was an entire fan. “Don’t you know, Cupid runs around in heels and a pencil skirt?” Though by no means would she call herself Cupid. When came the question, her own stomach rumbled, her hands finding it immediately as if to hush the sounds. She needed to eat. A shameful “No,” left her mouth. “So... Eat with me so I don’t look like such a loner.” Like he had much of a choice,

✹

               Normally, Jordan wouldn’t have impeded on someone’s space like this. With the place being as packed as it was, he didn’t have much of a choice. American’s weren’t really cool and open with this sort of thing, not like when he’d traveled abroad — it wasn’t necessarily common, just wasn’t received so negatively. With a nod, he got comfortable and figured he’d get through his coffee and such a little quicker than usual so he could get out of there. Hell, maybe he should’ve taken it to go. Socializing wasn’t his greatest attribute anymore. “Yeah, I wasn’t planning on sitting here smacking my food.” A shrug of his shoulders and a faint smile. Wondering a little why she felt the need to say such, must have had some interesting company. “Ah, ok —” In catching her drift he nodded his head and took another glance at the people she had been watching. “I mean, that makes sense. I’m a people watcher in general, not sure if I can entirely blame it on my career as a journalist but I get you, in a way.”

.

        Phoebe didn’t generally like to admit she was one, usually she wasn’t. Well, she tried not to be. Obviously, this was a failing moment and she was only doing to prove herself wrong. Apparently. Blaming her career was the easiest out, especially when she didn’t like to admit to something. Taking a deep breath, she slowly nodded her head she desperately wanted to switch the object off of her and what she deemed as a wrong-doing. You’re a relationship therapist for fucks sake, it’s in your nature. “Journalist, huh?” An easy conversation change. “What do you write?” She didn’t usually read or even listen to the news; headlines weren’t her thing. Husband and Daughter Taken Too Soon In Drunk Driving Accident. All she wanted was to read the comics that day. It was the last time she opened the fucking newspaper. The title alone had her halting in her place, but it was the photo of her late husband and daughter that had her crashing down. Make your own headlines, her mother said after. “Or I guess... what do you like to write?”

…

Roxelana shook her head as she took another drink from her own coffee as her heart settled back into place. Surely this was a sign that she’d had too much caffeine to drink but she’d make a note to try and cut off. “I’m fine” It was a phrase she’d been repeating the last few days - weeks? Roxie’s days blended together into one coffee cup at a time and ignoring her own feelings and at the same time still trying to take care of her friends, people she loved and their issues gliding over the hole in hers. “Really I’m fine. Might be my coffees or the things I have to take care of that just have me zoned. Roxie by the way. 

.

     I’m fine, a phrase she knew all too well and heard much too often. Phoebe herself had grown accustomed to saying the two words, but over time she’d learned to say other things, force a different kind of smile. Somewhere, she wondered if this young woman would learn to do the same. Rather than pushing the subject, the brunette merely nodded as a small yet sad smile found itself placed on her lips. “Phoebe-- it’s a pleasure to meet you, Roxie.” It really was, maybe because deep down Pheebs wanted to help. “Hopefully it isn’t something too serious,” She began, her voice trying to be comforting. As much as it could be when she didn’t know. “My mother always told me you can’t focus if your mind is surrounded with too much.”

Everett had decided to meet Phoebe for coffee which he hasn’t done in such a long time. It was always nice and refreshing to talk and and see his friend before a shift, and that’s exactly what he needed. Friends before running into a burning building. He loved being a firefighter, he was born to be a firefighter but sometimes Everett wondered if he was destined to do something else. Texting Phoebe he’d be a few minutes late, Everett walked in to see what she always did best, eavesdropping on someone else’s conversation. The firefighter in his gear laughed a little at the sight and then sat down at the table , pulling the chair across from her out and shook his head “I didn’t say anything, but you are doing it again.” He laughed a little, and continued with “What’s wrong with this mysterious young girl?” He questioned the brunette, and then ordered his coffee & a banana nut loaf when the barista came to their table.

.

        I didn’t say anything. “Are you sure?” Phoebe immediately questioned, brows furrowing as her eyes narrowed, “I’m positive you did.” Maybe she was hearing things, that tended to happen after the loss of her family. Now-- now she just did anything she could to feel the void she felt in her heart. Like going out for coffee, eavesdropping in on conversations. Hell, she was even debating on getting a cat. Conversation came easy with Everett, and though he made comment on her habits, he never seemed to judge. A smirk pulled at the corner of red stained lips, hazel hues flashing towards the young girl before back to him, Phoebe only ordering her own coffee before continuing with what she’d overheard, “Thinks her boyfriend’s cheating on her because he’s showing signs.” Hands came up to form quotations, “It seems her mother, or whomever, is trying to talk her down from the idea. Like, maybe he’s doing something nice? I don’t know. I’d like to believe that’s the case.” Especially in Phoenix, for Christ’s sake.

Julian had been late. He was hardly ever late, or at least, that’s what he’d like to tell himself. In a sense it was correct, he wasn’t. He was always on time, but he failed to realize that that was usually his career he spoke of. Personal matters, he was usually late to. And usually, because of said career. When he finally arrived, he swiftly sat across from his friend, “Sorry, I’m late. Things came up at the off–” Before he could finish, Pheebs would turn to him, only then indicating that she wasn’t that concerned. She had been obviously been distracted by something else, and this made Julian feel a little less guilty. “Just apologizing for being late. Did I miss something good? You look quite preoccupied.” He stated, looking off into the direction she had been when he sat down. His eyes falling upon a girl, who was on the phone, their eyes meeting, which caused the girl to crinkle her nose at him, before then turning away from his. He refocused on Phee, “You know her?”

.

       Caught, red-handed when Julian pulled up to the table. Maybe that was why she couldn’t fault him for the late appearance. She wouldn’t have been good company for the first fifteen anyway. A sorry excuse for a smile tugged at the corner of Phoebe’s lips as she shook her head. What did he have to apologize for? Nothing. People were late, it happened. Hazel hues followed his line of sight and instantly to went to raise her hand to shush him, shoo his vision elsewhere, as if to say no, don’t! Instead, he took a seat across from her and the brunette ducked her head, a quiet laugh bubbling from red-stained lips. “It’s fine.” When came the questions, fire one after the other, the woman held her hand up, “You missed nothing, believe me.” That’s why she had been listening in to begin with. “And no, I don’t know her.” This time, Phoebe’s face mimicked that of the younger woman, scrunching up in somewhat distaste. “Am I bad person for doing that?” Came the immediate ask from her mouth. In her mind, listening in sometimes meant she could help.

~

                    “Not yet. But, even if I did, I’m pretty sure it would’ve gone right over that pretty little head of yours. Daydreaming about something good, I hope?” As much as she willed herself to refrain in laughing at the fact that Phoebe’s head was in the clouds, Abigail was unable. The brunette’s fingers tapped her mouth and chuckled. “Either you didn’t sleep a minute last night or you are just mentally exhausted, either way, spill the beans, Pheeb. The caffeine is on the way. What’s on your mind?” 

.

      As much as she wanted to say yes, in fact, she was daydreaming about something spectacular, maybe like a hot beach and a sexy half-naked man walking on it, but the truth was-- she was listening in conversations she shouldn’t be. All in the name of love. “Yeah, you know, good would be an overstatement.” Came the muttered response, eyes lifting in search of the coffee that was meant to arrive. Her friend knew her well, almost too well. How could she fault Abby for that? Well, she couldn’t. Rather than talking about the thoughts that plagued her mind, she swiftly pointed over her shoulder into the direction of the now much quieter phone conversation, “Just, seeing where I can save the day.” As if her job made her a superhero, ha-- yeah right. “Though thankfully, I don’t think divorce is in the cards for that young lady.”

✹

               Without possession of a shy bone in his body, Jordan was unafraid to move in on someone and their space when it was needed. A full coffee shop at midday it was an absolute if he wanted to grab a seat to drink is cuppa and chow down on his snack to fuel him through the rest of the day. “Nothing much, just — hey, I’m gonna join you for a little bit.” Shoulders shrugged, feigning some level of indifference. Jordan perhaps assumed too much that she was alone, a boyfriend or girlfriend could walk up at any moment. Not that it would move him. Somewhat absently gesturing with his hand to indicate the space of the café — “it’s a little packed in here and you had a free seat. I won’t be too long, and I’m probably gonna read my emails on my phone so my chewing should be the only thing that bothers you.” It was meant as a bit of a joke, simply trying to ease the situation. The man possessed an amazing ability to tune everything out and focus on task, yet also could impressively hone in on something specifically if it had been deemed something of interest. “That a friend of yours over there?”

.

        She was a terrible patron, to be listening in on other peoples conversations and ignoring the words of others. How rude, she thought. She would have scolded her daughter for doing the same. “That’s fine,” Her head slowly bobbed, though truthfully, it was unusual for someone to just pull up a seat next to her. She didn’t question it, not this time anyway. He was right, the place was crowded, and-- fuck, she’d been caught red handed. She had no intention of even being that long in café, merely to check her emails and eat a little lunch. “As long as you don’t eat with your mouth open, we won’t have any problems. I don’t prefer the See Food diet.” Unfortunately, she’d been so caught up in the world around her, she hadn’t been able to focus on much else. When came the question, her eyes widened as her eyebrows crawled up her forehead, before she ever so slowly shook her head, “Actually, no. I have no idea who she is. I’m a couples therapist- sometimes I just... have a tendency...” Need she say more? If she did, she wasn’t going to.

.

          Lola had decided to step out for the day, considering it was her day off, and soon found herself getting a coffee at a nearby shop, before she was otherwise distracted by a conversation happening around her. A young girl, discussing a cheating boyfriend, and asking advice on whether or not it was possible to push through and make it work. Young, and naïve. The poor thing. Lola knew the situation all too well. It was what resulted in her divorce, after all. Realising she wasn’t the only one staring, she turned slightly to look at the woman before her in line. “Looks like I’m not the only one invested.” The brunette muttered, trying to keep her voice down so the woman in question didn’t hear. “At least I hope that’s what you’re focusing on, otherwise this got awkward real fast.” Her head tilting subtly to the woman to actively point out what she was talking about.

.

     She’d been pulled from the conversation when she heard the voice from behind her, causing Phoebe’s mouth to tick at the corners, slowly turning into a small smile. She’d been caught, listening in. A habit she couldn’t quite break but was trying to. Next, Phoebe shook her head as a quiet laugh bubbled from her lips, “I do believe you’re correct in your assumption of me listening in.” She admitted with a slow, steady nod. Of course, the place was crowded and nobody would focus in on two women chatting, would they? “It’s... in my nature.” As if this girl wanted to hear what Phoebe did for a living, “Though I don’t think she has a chance of making it work.”