feel

In this moment I don't care, but I remember moments I cared. I was irritated or feared or cried. Didn't like it. There were times I loved it. Moving up and down on the scale makes me realize it is just about the moment. Everything is.

I just had a glass o' wine, a nice amount of tiramisu (sugarblast) and my brain is like something after a tsunami...

I am wondering about my future but I cannot see or say anything. I am sure I'm gonna be okay. I'll be fine. I have this sure feeling in my gut.

"We can't, we're afraid!" they responded.

"Come to the edge," he said.

"We can't, We will fall!" they responded.

"Come to the edge," he said.

And so they came.

And he pushed them.

And they flew.

Begs under my coat,

Baby, now, take me

I've just realized your pain and uncertainty. That meaninglessness of your life. And that you made your decision of living you're life this path.

I remember seeing you from the outside, just before I chose you. I know why I've chosen you as a mom. I wanted to help you, bringing happiness to your life. Choosing you was my decision. I knew I was able to do it, that I was strong and capable of anything.

I'm sorry for your unstepped steps, your unmade decisions and the unspoken words. But these were all your decisions, however hard it is for you to accept.

But, you know, every day is a new start. And it is up to you how you decide. It is up to you to smile and feel good, to be grateful of realizing and deciding on a different way.

I love you. I accept you.