tenderness lives in the hands

call me roo ✨ i write gender-neutral erotica.

💃 white & genderqueer & in my late 20s. neither butch nor femme but some third thing which name no human tongue can say. they/them. i practice polyamory. also, this blog is trans-inclusive.

‼️ this blog is not for straight people. don’t be weird & please don’t share my stuff if you have a large straight (esp male) audience.

🔞 this is a porn blog.

🍆 i use the words dick/cock/strap fairly interchangeably. take my words as literally or figuratively as you like, or some third, gayer thing.

🌹 tagging system is unreliable at best but most of my original writing tagged #this post is about queer sex. asks tagged #ask roo.

📚 i run a masterlist of queer novels. i have also been vaguely gathering resources on the craft of writing under #writing ref.

📝 i wrote some guiding principles for how i personally practice polyamory.

💸 if you like my work and you have a few bucks at the end of the month, i cordially invite you to tip me by contributing to mutual aid. i post fundraisers from sources i trust under the tag #mutual aid. no help is small.

❣️ if u just followed me and have read all the way here, give this post a lil heart to let me know ur with it!

of course you come almost right away. this position does it for you every time and they know it. they know once the vibrator reaches your clit it’s too much. so they fuck you through it and they slap your ass because they like how it bounces with the vibrations and it’s all so much. they keep going and they’re saying sweet things. that’s right baby, just like that. give that to me. a little more. you can take a little more. good girl. i know you’re not done.

their weight shifts and now they’re leaning on top of you, their weight pinning you to the mattress. you couldn’t pull the vibrator away anymore if you tried. they don’t want you to. they kiss your shoulders tenderly. they run their arm around your throat and now you’re in a chokehold but it feels so loving.

you are shivering and pulsing and shaking from aftershocks. you can’t really tell how many times you came, it might’ve been a few or it might’ve been one orgasm that was drawn out and took everything you had. but now you’re pinned underneath them and it feels so good and so tender and you’re overstimulated but you can’t pull the vibrator away. wouldn’t if you could because they’re not done with you.

their lips on your neck and their breath in your ear. their tone has turned from worshipful to a growl. you have to feed their hunger.

don’t stop, they say. you feel so fucking good. your pussy is perfect. give me more. your pleasure is mine. give.

okay. yes. you can drop back into pleasure. you can handle the stimulation. you close your eyes again and — they moan and — you’re shaking again. fuck. a sound comes from your throat. you’re trying to say their name but can’t make it past the first syllable.

that’s what does it for them — hearing you, hearing their name in your voice, hearing the pleasure. they push deep into you, pinning you just a little harder, grinding their hips into yours and you know they’re grinding their clit to the vibrations still moving through you. they come inside you, and you hear it and you feel the pulse of their pussy through the strap. it’s yours.

they don’t stop right away, of course — they slow down, they keep almost being done but then needing just a little more. you will let them take everything and they do.

like maybe your friend is really beautiful and brilliant. maybe she radiates a sense of freedom and personal autonomy that you feel drawn to like a moth.

but maybe she’s looking for someone you probably can’t give. the kind of relationship where you make up one another’s world. and she lives far.

and you could give her almost everything she wants, but not that. and you’re not sure she has caught onto your crush yet, if she’s playing with you on purpose or if she is open and trusting like this.

she says how safe she feels with you. you text each other « i love you »s, and « i miss you »s on hard days. and mostly you try not to think of the touch of her skin. of her smell. of what it would feel to press your lips to her collarbones.

you try not to be too dazzled. but she is so dazzling. and then she talks in this casual way about what she likes. and she described something tender, loving. but she also likes to top.

and like maybe you know if this story started it would be big. and now you can’t stop thinking about looking up from her from between her legs. giving her the right balance of worship and hunger that makes her feel loved and chosen and taken good care of.

a few hours pass and we wake up and your fingers are laced with mine. you’re holding our hands tight to your chest. and we’re a little surprised at finding ourselves like this. but i don’t mind at all. this is right where i feel you should be.

i don’t move. i squeeze your fingers. i can feel the beating of your heart. you snuggle against me. i can’t tell how asleep you are, or if you’re doing this on purpose.

we stay that way. it’s an endless number of minutes, maybe eight, i feel each second trickle by. punctuated by the rise and fall of your chest. the calm of your breath.

i feel your eyelids flutter. you’re awake. i hold my arms steady around you, you take in your surroundings and you grab at my forearm. i gently release you — but you pull me back in place. i pull you in tighter and you make this sweet contented noise. i pull you in closer and now my lips are so close to your neck.

i can smell the fragrance of your hair. it’s intoxicating having you like this, soft and sleepy and safe in my arms. my heart is racing and i am trying to bestill the thought of kissing you.

i break the silence. « hey, » i say gently. you give a little nod. your curls bounce lightly in my face. « can i try something? »

i get that nod again. i bring our interlaced fingers to my lips. press a gentle kiss on your index finger, then your middle. you unfurl from my embrace to face me.

your lips are just a brush away from mine now. i’ve never been this close to you. there is a sweetness in your eyes that makes my heart ache. you cup my cheek with one hand and already i’m dizzy with wanting you.

and sometimes i say please automatically when im close because i mean please don’t stop, please more, please give me, but i just say please and they say no. they won’t stop touching me but they say no. so i have to hold my breath for a second and just hold it. i look at them and it melts me and i almost lose it, and then they say good and my eyes widen and i throb.

they pull their fingers all the way out. they’re so slow. they make a show of pushing in a third. i take it so easy. they even spread their fingers.

they hit that spot again and again i’m grasping for them. need to have. i don’t say anything. i look at them.

they grasp at the sheets and gather their composure for just long enough to reach for the vibrator on the side table. they switch it up and give it to me.

« for you, » they tell me. they slip their hands down my cheeks so they’re now holding my throat. they squeeze a little. they say, « use it. »

they haven’t even touched me yet and my clit is throbbing. i was going to use it on them. there’s a wet spot beneath me and i’m so sensitive.

they slap one of my cheeks.

« use it, baby, » they repeat. « don’t forget your tongue. »

i refocus on their pleasure and moan into them. god, i love their warmth. i love the salt and wet of them. my tongue wraps around the tip of their clit, softly runs up and down them. pressing a little bit further each time.

« baby… »

their tone has a warning to it. i haven’t brought the vibrator to my clit yet. i look up at them. trying to make them feel me thinking yes, daddy. i hike my knees up and spread my legs so they can see what i’m doing.

i can feel it buzzing in my hand and that alone sends a jolt of shivers through me. they smirk. squeeze my neck.

« go ahead, baby, » they say. their voice is encouraging, but also stern.

i wrap my lips around their clit and bring the vibrator to my own. i touch so gently but they’ve already felt the shock it sent through me and the moan that started in my throat.

« good girl, » they say. yes. i try to keep it like this — the toy just light enough that i can buck away from it so it doesn’t distract me too much from what i’m supposed to do. which is please them.

another slap to my cheek. they can tell i’m being easy on myself. i prefer to come on /them/, their fingers, their tongue, their strap. and they know this. they like to use it to their advantage. they pull my face away from their pussy and i look up at them, hungry, tongue out.

« harder, » they say. i bring the buzzing back onto myself and press it to my clit and my eyes roll. « that’s what i want. keep doing that, » they say again.

of course, their voice nearly pushes me over so i have to stop again. just for a second. they pull my face back into their pussy. my tongue latches onto them, their taste, the way they squirm under me. my pussy throbs desperately. i ride a hard edge, holding the vibrator just an inch away. i look up and realize they’re watching my hips with such hunger.