See, I think Arthur was doomed to fail when he decided to kill Vanya. I think that was the point his quest for vengeance and answers started to matter more than his humanity, just enough to have him kill her. That was yet another moment he continued on that cycle of violence despite his intentions, where he talked of peace as he burned her alive. He can never break free because all his actions just serve to perpetuate this violence.
It’s always about cycles with him. Cycles of power, of violence, that vampire society has been stuck in for years. Always answering to the call of the beast, as they say, their fangs in the world, sucking out the life of it. And the Grimslayers also only work to perpetuate this cycle, keeping this war endless. And Arthur was never going to break out, not in the way he wanted to. Not with how deep he was, not with how bloody his hands were. It didn’t matter he threw away his little black book of people he’d killed, it didn’t matter he had a whole rebirth in flames in the Lunarchive, because in the end he still sacrificed his humanity for answers, in yet another twist of irony.
And in the finale, when he’s stood staring at the earrings Magnus gave him, full of human memories, he still feels that anger, that drive for vengeance circle back - because it’s a cycle. He clings to the humanity he himself sacrificed - and it’s always guilt over what he’s done as ‘the monster’ that rules him. Guilt over killing his family, over killing others, now about committing the most corrupting sin you can as a vampire, and seeing it reflected in his own aura.
And it’s so fitting that he lost his looks as he lost his humanity, because now he looks how he acts - monstrous, ugly. And he can cover it up but it’s only temporary, it always melts away to reveal what’s underneath, because he’s no longer trying to fight that monster. He’s no longer trying to find that balance that keeps him and the monster alive, and doesn’t hurt or kill others. And because he’s not seeking this balance, and is instead seeking to feed the beast, so to speak, all it does is grow, all it does is feed.
Inside of you there is a monster (hunger, anger, pride, desperation, despair, hatred, grief). You cannot escape it.
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