arthurianaposting

Sir Gareth of Orkney, nicknamed Beaumains

Ywain: I don’t know. Why?

Agravain: To get to the idiot’s house!

Agravain: Knock knock!

Ywain: Who’s there?

Agravain: The chicken!

Ywain: *silence*

Agravain: *grinning*

Ywain: *deep breath* I will not punch you under one condition!

Lancelot:

Morgan:

Mordred:

Arthur:

Agravaine:

Emperor Lucius:

Lionel:

The Lady of The Lake:

Kay:

painting a huge mural of his darkest secret on the wall of his kidnappers house (le morte)

taking his shoes off to walk across a bridge made of sword (chretien)

following a random dog into the woods and almost being eaten by lions (lancelot and the hart with the white foot)

falling asleep on the ground in the woods and getting kidnapped by sorceresses (multiple times)

threw hands with a 13 yr old and didnt even win (morien)

later tried to use clout to make 13 year old think hes cool. 13 year old only mildly impressed (morien)

got beat up by his own kid (multiple times)

canonically illiterate (chretien)

fighting a teenager for fashion crimes (die wrake)

going into a tournament in disguise and being recognized by yvain because he almost falls off his horse (stanzaic morte)

getting a fireball thrown at him by god for cuck crimes (vulgate grail quest)

getting beat up by bors and or hector and going into hiding (stanzaic morte, vulgate morte)

forgetting human language and running around in the woods without pants on (multiple times)

laying down in a random bed he finds in the road then being surprised when the owner of said bed comes back and lays down on the bed he owns.

stabbing the owner of said bed

making him a knight of the round table as a stabapology (le morte)

bursting into tears upon guinevere asking him what his name is and having to leave the country about it (vulgate)

getting a mean letter and immediately just crying and going to sleep (le morte)

Here’s the link!!!!!!!

(Please know that I made this like. FOR my friends so, the humor is like..my own and it’s a bit rife with my own opinions).

Here it is!!!! I cannot thank everyone enough for their involvement and support throughout this project. A special shoutout to @gringolet, who did the lovely cover art and explained inks to me, @lanzelet, who did the marginalia, and @pendraegon and @aarcanaa for help with editing!!

a lot of people have been bringing up the once and future king with the whole lancelot discussions we’ve been having and i guess i just wanted to like. put my thoughts out lol.

under the cut bc itll b a bit long, and warning that its gonna be kinda negative. i know this book is like important to a lot of people and meaningful to you and thats great this is not at all to attack you lol