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@pen-for-sword
Stephen King writing, "Just keep dancing with me like this, Garraty, and I'll never tire. We'll scrape our shoes on the stars and hang upside down from the moon" at the goddamn age of 18-19 between two boys is actually INSANE.
What do you MEAN he wrote such a beautifully complex and painful queer love story as a TEENAGER???
Definitely poetic but also LET ME JERK YOU OFF is peak gross teenage boy material too lol
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Do you guys remember how kidnap fantasies were popular on wattpad because young girls and queer teens were both made to feel shame at the thought of their own sexualities, so the fantasy of being kidnapped totally against their will was a way for them to engage with a romantic or sexual fantasy without feeling morally in the wrong for doing so? Added bonus that the fantasy involved being whisked away from repressive environments like home or school, right?
Finding out that Bram Stoker was in a sexless marriage and that scholars believe that he very likely was closeted gay puts the entire book into perspective as to WHY it reads EXACTLY like a self insert wattpad Dracula kidnap fic:
“I TOTALLY love my wife and would never do anything that an upstanding Good Straight Working Man wouldn’t do but oh nooo, big strong man with broad back and strong enough arms to carry me back to bed like a princess trapped me and claimed me as his, completely against my will 👉👈 But he protects me against the bad evil sexual women (who I assure you, I am TOTALLY sexually attracted to, as any straight man with a choice would be) but trust me, I do NOT want ANY of this. What’s that? The Count is not capable of feeling love? Would be a shame if I had the special ability to change tha-”
This is also the fantasy behind all those old bodice-ripper romances that people today like to mock or call problematic, by the way.
“Oh, my next forty years are going to consist of nothing but washing dishes and keeping house and bearing children for the disdainful man I married right out of high school because my parents said college was for men and I had no other obvious life path open to me? What if a pirate captain thought I was worth stealing away from it all? [what if I ran away but no-one could blame me for leaving]?”
#I read an article a long time ago about a woman who was raised in an incredibly repressive conservative christian community#where all that mattered was purity and virginity etc #She talked about how for a long time rape fantasies were the only way she could derive any pleasure from sex #because she couldn’t feel safe exploring the idea of wanting sex #it wasn’t really ABOUT rape or eroticizing assault or whatever #it was about creating a scenario where she was free from the shame associated with wanting #i think this is true of a lot of icky-seeming stuff in romance and erotica #it’s an imaginary scenario where nothing you don’t really want actually happens #but you can’t be blamed or feel guilty for it #you didn’t do anything wrong#anyway that article changed my perspective a lot #i think there’s also something to be said for people who have felt ugly and undesirable their whole lives #enjoying fictional scenarios where a hot alpha werewolf or whatever is so attracted to them he ‘cant help himself’ or whatever #because it can also be really shameful to want to be desired #when you feel like youre ugly and gross ( @headspace-hotel )
I will go into mourning if/when Tumblr is gone. So help me I have both whiled away time here so my brain can rest and I have had my brain rewired with what I learn here. Like now. With this.
I love you all, you wonders who share what you know, what you experience, your humanity and your empathy, I love you.
today I had a dream that there was a species of deer called “ice deer” and every winter they’d travel up North and have their babies in a frozen cavern and the babies would be sort of comatose in the cold, and then the deer would leave the babies there and migrate South until spring, and just before the first thaw, they’d go back up North and find their babies and wait for them to thaw out and wake up and they’d nurse them.
But with the Earth getting warmer and spring coming sooner and winters being less harsh up North, the babies were starting to thaw out too early, so when the Ice Deer got to them, they’d been awake already and starved to death.
So there were only like, 300 Ice Deer left. They were bigger than elks, all white with blue antlers that even the females grew, and I realized the only solution would be to somehow lead them North every year when it started thawing. As a human I could check the weather and the ice in the North Pole and when it was time to go to the babies, even if the deer thought it was still winter.
So I had to devise a plan to get the Ice Deer to follow me North to their babies on time every spring, and it just became part of my life. I did other stuff and lived life as usual while keeping track of the weather near the end of winter and I’d be like, welp it’s time to lead the deer North, and I’d set out to find their winter home.
And a lot of people were like “this isn’t a permanent solution. We need to focus on climate change so it’s fixed for good.”
and I was like dang I know but the Ice Deer need us right now so, someone’s gotta do it? And it just became a thing I did.
ppl messaging me like “I thought this was real for a minute”:
: O !!!!!!!!
Everyone asking is absolutely allowed to use the Ice Deer in their fantasy world building and in fact I encourage it bc I love the idea of this one made up animal quietly linking all of your universes.
when a child goes to Build-A-Bear and constructs a teddy from the parts available no one bats an eye, but when I, Victor Frankenstein,
i bet a HUGE number of vampire hunters would develop obsessive compulsive symptoms around the possibility of being a vampire. carrying around a little compact mirror so they can compulsively check for a reflection. saying DON’T INVITE ME IN to anyone who opens a door for them, and if they forget they have to walk out and tell the person to revoke the invitation. spending hours after counting anything obsessively wondering if they did it compulsively you get the picture
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im so bad at complimenting art i go “OOGGGH” and “THAT IS SO EPIC” which is not enough but i mean those so genuinely
love a character that's like. i survived (<- not a brag) (<- this is a curse that weighs on me every waking hour)
Hey, it’s me, your English teacher from the beginning of the movie who read a passage that would become thematically relevant later while you stared longingly out the window. I noticed since you came back from your magical quest you’ve been even more listless that usual. Yeah I know about that. We usually have about one or two every semester, so I try to cater my curriculum to the current supernatural crisis so you can remember some appropriate words from classic literature at the right moment in the plot. It’s kind of a thankless job but the world’s still here so I’m not doing too bad haha. That was a joke you can laugh. Anyway I know I’ve kind of taken on a mentor role for you because of your lack of stable father figure but just wanted to let you know that I am a mandated reporter so please don’t tell me if you’re thinking about killing yourself
Nothing more cringe-worthy than a story where the writer clearly thinks they're making some broad statement about the human condition in the modern day but actually it's just been too long since they left their specifically dysfunctional community, which is ultimately irrelevant to most of society. And 95% of the time that community is Hollywood.
[writer who got his big break and moved to LA about 10 years ago] wow has anyone noticed how everyone has become an inauthentic, self-obsessed social climber in the past decade?
🥰 Whumpee who lets themselves be restrained 🥰
When they obediently cross their arms behind their back, and don't fight back as Whumper ties them together, even as a lone tear slips down their cheek. When they outstretch their wrists for Whumper to lock the cuffs around. Slacking their jaw and opening their mouth for the gag, or closing their eyes as the blindfold slips around their eyes...
...Yeah 🫶
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Can we just say abuser again. “Narcissist” this “narc abuse” that, and then 90% of the time people just describe regular abuser behavior.
“It’s a classic tactic for narcissists to take away something you care about and then give it back and expect gratitude” you mean it’s a classic tactic for abusers. That is not some special strategy that only narcissists use, it’s literally just manipulation. Manipulation is a classic abusive behavior.
I am begging people to understand that abuse is a pattern of behaviors that anyone can fall into, not some special separate group that you can neatly label and separate yourself from.
Do u ever read a friend’s fic and it’s like holy shit how do you consider me qualified to talk to you?
No
Y’all need better self-esteem
Alright I have been enabled so I’m gonna say somethings.
Fatalistic sarcasm is a thing, however, it usually hides deep feelings of insecurity, and whether you consciously recognize this or not, it validates them. Seriously, I used to constantly make jokes about how other people’s work was better than mine, and it did nothing for my self-esteem, it was a tool to deflect from my own feelings of inferiority and it actively worked against me thinking critically about my own and other people’s work. If it was a joke I could put myself down instead of analyzing why someone’s work was better and trying to incorporate that into my own
As someone who took creative writing courses I was constantly surrounded by other brilliant people, if I hung my head in shame every time I read something as good or better than mine I never would have lifted it.
As someone who has watched a lot of writers with very good idea’s crash and burn I mean it when I say you either develop a healthy sense of respect for your own work or you stop writing.
There’s three things I really wish more people consider
1. Do you think their work is better because it’s a different style, one that you like? There’s an element to ‘the grass is greener on the other side’, I have seen people work in some amazing styles that I wished to god I could replicate, some I managed, some I never did, but there’s nothing wrong with either. having a different style Is Not the same as having a bad style, each has their own strengths and you can admire one without putting yours down
2. Knowing someone who is a better writer is a blessing and if they knew you were using their work to bring yourself down they would not be happy, mooch off that friend, analyze their work, ask them to edit your shit, as long as you’re not annoying them be shameless about it. the best thing creative writing did for me was give me the confidence to ask people to critic my work and shamelessly better each other for that sharing
3. People need to normalize being confident in their work, the quality of your work has literally nothing to do with your worth as a person, the quality of your work has nothing to do with your worth as a writer. You can write something really shitty and the only thing I’d say to you is that your trying and I respect you for that
this is true for art too btw
i do think there should be more stories and shows and stuff about guys falling in love with butch women actually, i think that’d be a good thing. and not ‘this is as butch as twitter can handle’, i mean butch as can fucking be without apology, and making those boys weak in the knees about it. i think it’s great actually to have f/m romances that exist to break gender norms, too. i think it sucks that the only mainstream het romances that exist are either about women who are already feminine or with women who are just a little too scarily masculine and have to be fixed into being girlier. that’s shit.
it’s not like. taking away from queer people if you let “the straights” have some genderfuckery in their romance, too. that’s good, actually, the blurring of gender roles and performance and getting better understandings of your own sexuality is good for everyone. and it’s really fucking weird if you think that mainstream “het” romances shouldn’t feature women who are “too masculine” because that’s only allowed for queer people, somehow.
btw it's not spelled "Maori", it's Māori. the tohutō (the line above the vowel) is important for the pronunciation of the word. if you don't have the tohutō on your keyboard (it should be on your phone keyboard at least), it's "Maaori" as the tohutō lengthens the vowel it's placed over. never Maori, preferably Māori but Maaori in a pinch. thanks
"character doing a c+ job of breaking the cycle of abuse" is such a crunchy dynamic forever. what if i'm giving my all to give you a better life than i had and i'm succeeding but "better" just isn't quite enough. what if my blind spots and deeply ingrained trauma and inexperience mean that you will be indelibly scarred by me despite my best efforts. what if my abuser's influence still bleeds through at times because i know nothing else. what if i go so far in the opposite direction to avoid it that i hurt you in ways i couldn't have anticipated. what if my undeniable love and unforgivable shortcomings came part and parcel with each other. what if your love and gratitude and resentment and pain came part and parcel too. what if we both knew you deserved better but i was all you had. what if we had to move forward and reckon with that. what then
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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cataloguing sensations
