mulder, i wouldn't put myself on the line for anybody but you

your 2nd priority should be bringing joyful and loving energy to those around you. your 1st priority should always be committing to the bit

"like a boss" by lonely island was released ten thousand years ago when mammoths still roamed the big wide world. feel old yet?

Old movies that suck and are awful are great, but new movies that suck and are awful are stupid. Hope this helps

hit her gpt-spot by accident and she started saying we weren't just having sex, we were teaching a masterclass on pleasure

can i get an amen break burger

hmmm I think I will reblog The low poly 3d bird from daytona usa

george’s relationships with women are all doomed because he is a disturbed, depressed man with a tortured soul owing in part, though not entirely, to his status as a deeply repressed homosexual man with longstanding unrequited feelings for his best friend. jerry’s relationships with women are doomed because he’s an asshole

podracer Sebulba notably absent from swift-kelce wedding attendees............

they should invent putting on sunscreen that doesn't feel like putting on sunscreen

[Trent reznor voice](close as physically possible to the microphone) ssix little monkeys, jumping on the bed.. one fell down, and he bumped his head

had a dream i walked up to a food stall and they tried to sell me 3 takoyaki for $130 and i was so mad that i woke myself up before completing the transaction. idiot lost their customer to the waking world lol. charge less next time.