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“You’re the cute and quiet customer that frequents the coffee shop where I’m a barista and also where my rival barista works and we’re both fighting for your attention in increasingly creative and inconspicuous ways (making foam art, writing cheesy pick-up lines on your napkin etc. etc.)” AU.

“You’re my roommate who’s super cute and it’s the middle of the night and you’re cramming for your exams in your flannel pajamas and disheveled hair and it’s becoming increasingly hard for me not to kiss you” AU.

“You’re an Art student and I’m an English major and you keep stealing the papers for my assignment to doodle and I would kill you but you’re really cute and hey that’s actually a really nice sketch” AU.

“You’re the perpetual frowner in class and one day as I’m answering the teacher I intentionally make a very cheesy pun and I can hear crickets but you’re laughing out loud and that makes me feel very much accomplished” AU.

“The manager says the only reason the restaurant where we work at is popular is because people enjoy eating while watching our relentless flirting with each other but I swear to God we’re not flirting???” AU.

“I ditch prom to attend a local poetry slam and you’re also there and I never really noticed what a cute smile you have and hey do you maybe want to bond over our mutual love for ‘Howl’???” AU.

“You’re new in town and you seem very intimidating but as it turns out you have an awful sense of direction even with a map and you’re actually adorkable so here let me help you” AU.

“It’s Valentine’s Day and I’m single and you want to cheer me up but you can’t cook nor bake to save your life so you make me hot chocolate instead and it is delicious and I think I love you???” AU.

“It’s gym class and we’re playing volleyball and you spike really well and you manage to hit the ball square in my face and I think I’m bleeding and you’re apologizing profusely and it’s okay but you’re really cute so I guess I’ll take you up on that offer for coffee” AU.

“You’re the jerk-face customer that keeps on thumbing through their phone while ordering their drink so I exact revenge by spelling your name wrong on your cup and drawing phallic pictures on your coffee” AU.

“Our mutual friend invites us to go shopping with them and it’s kind of awkward and now you’re pushing them around the mall in a shopping cart and you’re both screaming like excited children and I’m paying the cashier and pretending I don’t know either of you” AU.

“Our mutual friend invites us for Thanksgiving dinner with their other friends and now there’s a full-fledged food fight going on with potatoes and turkey flying everywhere and we’re both seeking refuge under the table whilst sharing a bag of chips that you brought (just in case)” AU.

“You and I are both baristas at a coffee shop and one day I step out of the café to take a break and walk in on you gleefully drawing phallic pictures on the chalkboard outside that no one pays attention to so what are you doing?” AU.

“You and I go out to a sushi bar and the sushi chef yells at you for being allergic to a particular kind of fish and now you’re crying and I’m trying to comfort you” AU.

“You and I are at a sushi restaurant and you’re continuously snagging sushi off the belt that I have to pay for and you don’t seem to be going to stop anytime soon but you look so cute when you’re eating with that smile on your face what the hell man” AU.

“The mailman constantly mixes up your home address and mine together and keeps on sending me your letters and packages and I’m sorry I look through them but your life seems very interesting as well as those books on black magic in one of your packages so wanna talk about it over a cup of coffee?” AU.

“We’re both strangers sitting in the same booth at an eatery because all the other booths are full and you’re drawing smiley faces on your plate with ketchup and wow your concentrated frown is cute” AU.

“It’s our mutual friend’s wedding and they keep shoving us into each other because we’re the only ones at the ceremony who are single” AU.

“You’re my roommate and it’s way past midnight and you’re talking about how Charles Dickens inspired prison reform and how the moon must feel insignificant because it borrows light from the sun and this is all very interesting but will you please shut up and go to sleep” AU.

“You’re actually a really friendly and chill vampire and at night you float around outside of my bedroom window to talk with me about the universe and stuff” AU.

“You’re going through my sketchbook and giving questioning looks and I swear to God I’m just a deranged artist and not a serial killer” AU.

“We live next door to each other and I can see you through the window while you’re dancing to your iPod in your flannel pajamas and disheveled hair and God you’re a dork” AU.

“I’ve been standing in line at the coffee shop for hours and you casually cut through for your drink but also buy me my favorite blend and now I’m not so sure what to make of you” AU.

“I’m sick so you make me chicken soup and I’m really grateful but I’ve also seen you read books on magical spells and potion-making so I’m not sure if I should drink your soup in case it turns me into a toad” AU.

“There’s a scrawny black cat in our neighborhood that hates everyone and everything but follows you around for some reason and I see you pet it and feed it fish fries are you a witch” AU

“I’m a perpetual frowner and most certainly not a morning person and I work part-time at a breakfast bar and your disheveled hair and content smile as you eat my waffles and scrambled eggs is the only thing that can get me to smile” AU.

“You’re the one in class who has tattoos all over their arms and piercings and everybody’s scared of you and one day I catch you watching cat videos and doodling in the middle of a lecture and wow you’re a dork” AU.

“I work part-time as a cashier at the local corner store and you come here regularly to shop and bond with me over the microwavable chicken bites so how about I take you out on a proper date instead?” AU.

“I’m the owner of a magic shop and you discover my magics one day when you walk in on my cat flying around inside the shop on a broom and now I have to take you in as my apprentice or turn you into a toad” AU.

“You’re the health-conscious med student and I’m the chain-smoking art student who’s also your barista and you leave me notes on smoking and lung health on your napkins and also a 20-page essay on lung cancer tucked under your saucer” AU.

“You’re a tea-lover yet you come to the coffee shop where I work at just to see my foam art and you give me hefty tips regularly so I’ve taken it upon myself to master the art of tea-making just for you” AU.

“I’m a fashion major and I’m working on my illustrations and maybe I’ve had too much coffee but I swear I just saw one of the mannequins move so here I am calling you in the middle of the night please help I’m scared” AU.

“You work at a fast food restaurant and as you hand me my food you lecture me for ruining my health what is this hypocrisy” AU.