ye shall have a song @peaceable-kingdom - Tumblr Blog

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apparently still use tumblr occasionally at my big age

i’m moving back to mass in less than two weeks and i really don’t know what to feel about that. feels like im either walking towards the end of the road or a start of a new life, but i can’t tell which it is yet. im afraid im going to absolutely lose my shit at some point, but that breaking point just hasn’t arrived yet.

i’ve got to get out of the restaurant industry. i’ve got to make that change. i cannot fail school a second time. being fully aware of my autism/adhd is a help but the perfectionism and self worth issues that i’ve been working on aren’t completely gone. i’m just really hoping i can make the right choices this time and really change things for myself.

#genuinely v worried about me #but there’s not much to be done at this point #the train is leaving the station #or the moving truck rather #just glad to get out of this damn city #and to leave behind all the memories of ghosts past #me

sonsofadam

Peonies

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Edvard Munch, The Hands, 1895

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#she did in fact propose #and then she unproosed #made me feel guilty about my mind #made me feel like being myself is something to apologize for #i learned a lot #i loved her a lot #I didn’t love her as much as she loved me and she still left #love is hard #we all deserve people who are willing to love all of us #things are better now but autistic burnout is hard and loneliness is too #idk just thought of this post from forever ago and seeing as i used it in the engagement announcement #wanted to address it for myself on here once more #idc that no one uses this site anymore #im connecting with my inner teen #fight me #me

singing your songs to myself in my apartment alone so i don’t forget them

never have, never will

#idk i just had to put this here i guess #feel like im literally 17 again #i miss you so much all the time but i know this is the way it needs to be #for our mental health #but still #fuck #still #i think about you always #drivers license reminds me of you in a non romantic way #no one quite understands that #anyways im so much more confident and happy in who i am these days #just missing you terribly bill #me

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i love the part of growth that allows you to look back on a previous period of your life and recognize that parts of it were unhealthy. something that felt so normal wasn’t in hindsight. you’re not supposed to feel that tired all the time. you’re not supposed to be treated like that.

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