paradox.

     Dark eyes shift from his milkshake to rest on the woman intently. He was silent, taking a small sip of milkshake before finally giving a small nod. ❛ It all comes down to if we want to make our parents happy or if we want to make ourselves happy. ❜ He grabs another fry, lightly dipping it into the milkshake before eating it eagerly. He could understand how she felt, he had gone through it all growing up. Still he had to live on both sides of his family, and it had more easily pushed him forward as a person. ❛ Isn’t there housing a schools? You could go to college for art and live there. Get yourself a job, things like that. But it depends on who is more important in the equation. You or your father. ❜

Her gaze dropped to the table. She still couldn’t pinpoint any specific thing that gave her true happiness; everything felt fleeting. Was that normal? She didn’t know anymore. Her father had given her everything-- food, shelter, clothing, money, safety, health, money... anything she could have possibly wanted or needed yet the more she thought about it, the emptier she felt. Her appetite was lost as the conversation progressed, abandoning the fry in the condiment. “Yeah, I guess...” Ahyoung never had to fend for herself, she had always used the wealth and status of her family as a way to rise above. Other than that, she didn’t believe she had any redeemable qualities on her own. She knew that the real world would be harsh on her. “My father is everything to me,” she mused unconsciously.

     🎧 – A mimicked drawing was made next to his after he landed his vision on the paper after she revealed her artwork. A hand leaned against the table, propping his body up as he looked down and slightly hovering over her to look at the wrinkled paper more closely, “Who’s not trying?” He played with the words she said to him with a soft laugh. The high school student took an empty seat and placed his school bag aside, glancing at the cup of tea he had ordered and back at the female, “Do you happen to drink a lot? If you do… Why?” He questioned in curiosity. Her thoughts were questionable about his drinking habits but he wasn’t ever planning on drinking anytime soon. 

     All he let on was that it was an exaggerated term of endearment. He could easily give pet names too. Just wouldn’t use them much if others like the confident stylist were around. All Christian did was watch him and Ahyoung interact as he sat down. Not sure what to say. If he should interrupt. Finally he saw an opportunity that wouldn’t be considered rude. “It’s nice to meet you too, Homin.” There we go. Late but better than nothing. Manners counted for something. Better say it now before the two started to banter again.

     “Nice?” He looked totally lost. Not used to this. Not this place aside from picking up or dropping of a friend. Everything was so trendy. Fancy. Fixed up. “I told Ahyoung that I was open to ideas. I just don’t want to change my hair color. And I don’t want one of those strange side…” The word was too elaborate for him to remember in Korean. He picked a different word instead. “One of those strange cuts. With a picture on the side.” He raised his eyebrows a little. “Please don’t make me look like an American hipster.”

    The hallway was silent. As it should’ve been. But that didn’t mean Siyang could take his time. He had to put an end to this as swiftly as possible. He loosened his grip slightly. Allowed her a little more air so she could breathe in and hopefully get a clearer head. Once the panic started to subside. He moved his hand back just enough so he could quickly press down again if needed. In case of retaliation. He predicted it would take a few tries.

     “Breathe.”     

He spoke slowly. All he could do now was get her attention and get her to shut up. Cooperate. It was cooperate or dead weight option was going to be the way out the window. He preferred not to. But figured it wouldn’t end that way. She was stubborn from what he was told but not stupid. A few well placed threats should be enough. Superficial injuries. Temporary marks. Nothing major. Just enough to break and silence.

     Siyang tried to shrug off the woman’s free hand but didn’t remove his own from her throat. Not completely. It was too risky.

     “Ahyoung… Calm down, Ahyoung.” Usually a name caught attention. He still kept his voice low. Firm but not aggressive. The last thing he wanted was for her to freak out more. He wanted her to calm down and give in willingly. It made a difference. To force it was too much effort. It’d even be like losing because he couldn’t control her. Clear communication was better. Easier. For the both of them. Also because she was supposed to taken away with the least amount of damage as possible. Siyang didn’t want to have to lose his temper.

     “I think your brother would appreciate it a lot more if you didn’t make a scene.” Oh, he definitely knew him by now.

Both hands were now on his that was wrapped around her throat. She still could not make out the face of the man hovering above her; only specks of light danced in her vision from the panic that surged through her body. The brunette gulped down oxygen the moment he allowed it, releasing some of the tension on her neck. At that moment, she was not listening to his words-- only to her body’s needs. 

She froze at the sound of her name, the composure in his voice instilling fear in the girl. Calm? She was anything but-- there was nothing that could be done to calm her down in this situation. Who was he? How did he know her name? What did she want from her? All of those questions were answered with the mention of her brother. It was him. 

She was eerily quiet now. Ahyoung could hear her heart pounding in her ears. Was he going to hurt her like he did to her brother? The girl kept her grip on him despite her fingers that were now trembling. 

“I can’t give you what you want,” she tried to keep her voice steady, to sound strong, but it sounded like she was on the brink of tears. 

Pathetic. 

Jin shook his head a bit as he took the papers back, laughing more to himself because he had the same reaction when he had been handed the final cut by the writer. It was terrible but he didn’t have the time to fix it himself. “I didn’t apply, no. I had just written some papers for classes and one of my instructors put me in for the job. I didn’t expect to get it but, here I am. It’s a good pass time though.”

     🎧 – Shoulders rose up to the alcohol statement, whether or not he would ever partake in such a social event activity was questionable. A certain quest came first and everything else behind that didn’t matter to him, he was a simple student with a mind straight for the one goal. Drinking alcohol for majority of the time was used to enjoy their time or drink for the sake of forgetting; neither of the two particularly fell in his category so the reasoning for him to was nonexistent. Noticing the female’s behavior and thought towards the topic, Sooha decided to leave it alone. It wasn’t any of his business anyways and he shouldn’t concern himself in something that won’t help him. “You draw a lot better than what I can!” He grabbed the mistreated paper, grabbing a pen out of his school bag before drawing an disproportion stick figure of a woman–? Or a man– It was hard to tell. Truth be told, he only doodled in his notebook when he was near dying of boredom in class. Occasionally it was the person who was on his mind every minute otherwise it was certain things his classmates were thinking about that day. “Laugh at it and I will switch that drink with your paint cup,” he included a laugh at the end to indicate the joking statement.

text from last night

[SMS » nana] so this your way of saying you’re sorry for being the epitome of a hot mess

Deep down inside, Youngmi envied Ahyoung’s talent for visual arts. Her friend was so good at drawing that she could easily make a living out of that; she’d have no problems whatsoever. Dark eyes kept on scanning the sketch, a mixture of white envy and joy rushing through her veins. A smile painted her lips as she shook her head slightly and answered the other female. “You’re crazy. Who in the world would ever want to see me naked? Please. But make sure to draw some massive boobs for me, alright? Big, soft and round boobs. And pretty and cute and pink nipples, too, please.”

As much as people loved her work, it was impossible for her to make a living out of it because of her father. Despite showing no interest, he still wished demanded for her to take part of the family company’s activities. Ahyoung was covetous of Youngmi’s seemingly perfect family who all loved and supported each other no matter what. The brunette couldn’t help but laugh at the other’s amusing request. “What? Do you want them bigger than your head?” she asked, gaze momentarily shifting to her friend’s chest.

     “For some reason, I do trust you.” He chuckled a little and then nodded. The plan was officially in motion. He was naturally worried but more curious to see how everything would turn out. What if they were found out? Surely he wouldn’t be nudged out the door. Rich people were supposed to be gracious and classy weren’t they? It’d be fine. No one would die. Life would move on. He still wanted it to work out though. The less embarrassment the better. For both of them. Him especially? Or Ahyoung. She’d have to deal with them later. He could just avoid them the rest of his life. Oh well. Only time could tell if it’d actually work or not. Might as well try! It’d be fun hopefully. Christian raised an eyebrow at the pet name as he stood up. “Lead the way, Mausebär. You can tell me what I need to know while we’re there. I’m sure your friend will have input to give too.”

It was a strange feeling to earn someone’s trust when they didn’t have hers. When her whole social life was about making connections, who could benefit her in what way, it was hard to differentiate when actual friendship came into play. Even now, she thought of this as a transaction of mutual benefit. She wondered what was the reason that he trusted her or if he was just saying it so that he’d feel better about the mini makeover. “What did you call me?  Mausebär? What does that even mean?”

Jin was always welcoming to friendly people so he was glad that when she sat down, she wasn’t one who was going to be cold, she was at least interested in what he was doing. “Editor, yes. Somehow ended up doing it but I don’t mind. Keeps me moving.” He hummed, folding his hands into his lap as she read.