p,

it’s 9:45PM i’m lying in my bed writing this while “love” by lana del rey is playing in the background. as always i’m thinking about you and the things you said. i havent seen you in three weeks and i don’t know how to feel. i don’t know what’s going on in your life because you would never voluntarily tell me and i would never text you to ask because i really don’t wanna annoy you. i just hope you’re doing well and everything is going the way you want it. i really miss you and it hurts to say that cause my dumb ass knows that you don’t think about me at all. you have your own stuff going on and my emotional self just doesn’t fit in there and i get that. every time i go outside i find something that reminds me of you. when i hear someone say something funny i wonder if you would’ve laughed about it and damn i miss your laugh so much. it’s really disappointing to be a second choice but i don’t even think i’m your second choice i’m probably on place 21 or something. at this point you know very well how i feel and i don’t even care anymore. i don’t care if you know that every quote is about you. every song i add to my love playlist and every time i say i’m sad it’s because of you. it’s not fair tho.. i shouldn’t have told u that you make me sad cause your good heart will make you feel bad for it and i hate it. i hate myself for feeling this way. i hate myself for not just leaving you alone.

never use a person to forget another 

You are alive and have witnessed the first blackhole to ever be seen in human history.