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if i look back, i am lost
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@pausanonsense
another comm ^^

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Because Cheong Myeong is literally a ghost of the past in the body of a living person, could he see ghosts? Because if so, it would simultaneously improve his condition and, on the contrary, only make it worse.
Right after his reincarnation, he would hardly have paid much attention to the people around him. To the fact that many of them literally had injuries incompatible with life. The first signs came when he had already reached Mount Hua.
"What's that child screaming about?"
"What do you mean?" Yun Jong asked in bewilderment. It was clear from his face that he truly hadn't heard anything.
Cheong Myeong stared at him for some time.
The screaming didn't stop. Rather, on the contrary, it felt as though it was no longer just one child screaming, but at least a hundred.
.......
"What are you lazing around here for?! Go swing your sword if you have the strength!"
After that, Cheong Myeong quickly figured out that these were the screams of the children who had died fighting the cultists who had come to Mount Hua after the Heavenly Demon's death. Every time he heard the screams again, he would go into the prayer hall and, placing sticks of incense, pray for their repose, and the screams would quiet down.
If only it were that simple, but ghosts are everywhere. And telling them apart from ordinary people, if they have no visible injuries, is almost impossible. Because of which, all the kids look at him strangely when he steps around something invisible and sometimes glances back, as if hearing something.
* * *
When they arrived at the Tang Clan, these oddities became impossible to ignore. Cheong Myeong began talking to the air as if to his best friend.
He complained to them, joked, laughed, and even got angry. And most importantly, he was clearly happy.
"Maybe he has schizophrenia?" Jo Geol quietly suggested. The gazes of the four immediately turned towards their junior.
"Possibly."
* * *
When they were searching for their ancestor's grave, Cheong Myeong spent some time talking to the air. And then...
"...That way."
.....
After discovering the bones, he began talking to himself twice as much. Having pieced the puzzle together, it wasn't hard to guess.
"He hears ghosts?"
"I think he sees them too." Tang Soso answered. She had more than once seen him staring at a single spot, as if at someone.
"And what do we do?" Jo Geol asked, and notes of nervousness could be heard in his voice.
"We should inform everyone else. I think there is medicine for this," Baek Cheon said confidently. Or rather, he wanted to appear confident.
Everyone nodded.
* * *
"Here!"
"What is this?" Cheong Myeong asked, looking at the talisman Im Sobyeong held out. All the alliance leaders had gathered around and were looking at him with a kind of awe and anticipation. What had they come up with now?
"This helps get rid of the ability to see ghosts. They say shamans usually use them in everyday life so as not to go mad."
"Why do I need it?"
"...Everyone gifted with this uses them so as not to go mad," Tang Gunak said. His face was worried. Behind him, Tang Bo put on a serious face and nodded.
Cheong Myeong raised his eyebrows.
"I have no need for it. These ghosts are my loved ones."
"What?!"
"Cheong Myeong, you don't understand. You're literally going to slowly go mad at this rate. The living shouldn't have such frequent contact with the dead! It can..." Cheong Mun, next to him, patted Baek Cheon on the head.
Cheong Jin rolled his eyes.
"Sasuk. I don't care."
"..."
"I'll say more. They're the only thing that helps me."
Cheong Myeong smiled. Everyone who saw it felt shivers run down their skin.
"So don't worry. Everything is under control."
After all, I'm dead too.
His song ❤️
I’m currently reading return on the mount hua sect, i’m on the pirate arc right now it’s just so chaotic ♡~٩( ˃▽˂ )۶~♡
If Tang Bo had truly reincarnated, he would have been shocked by the fact that a literal harem of the most influential people in the Kangho had gathered around Cheong Myeong. And kids who protect and look after him with all their might. AND HE DOESN'T EVEN NOTICE IT! Hello, it's not normal if your portrait is hung on every corner!
Opening his eyes right after his death, Tang Bo learns first of all: a hundred years have passed, some war with Paegun had started, and his dear Hyung had also reincarnated. The last part was the most important, since there couldn't exist two identically insane bastards in the story.
When the theory was confirmed and they rushed into each other's embrace, Tang Bo could catch, out of the corner of his eye, angry and even envious gazes directed at him.
'Maybe the previous owner of this body did something to them?' Tang Bo thought and immediately dismissed them.
Until the moment the young head of the Namgung family challenged him to a duel. Which he lost miserably. After him, there was some handsome guy from Mount Hua who first politely questioned him about his relationship with Cheong Myeong, and then also challenged him to a duel and lost.
After that, watching Hyung's surroundings far more closely and learning the stories, Tang Bo understood that he now had far more rivals than in the past!
* * *
"Hyung, what relationship ties you and Paegun... Uh, Jang Ilso, I think." Cheong Myeong raised his brows and said.
"His neck belongs to me."
"......"
"We are enemies, and someday I will cut off his head."
"PHEW... Do it as fast as possible, Hyung." Tang Bo exhaled in relief and smiled, pouring out the alcohol along with the note.
'To my dear swordsman♡.'
He had been pursuing him for decades, get in line, dandy boy.
* * *
"What is that Tang bastard constantly doing next to Cheong Myeong-a?! He's even sleeping in the same room with him! There's no second bed there!"
"Where did he even come from?"
...
All gazes instantly turned to Tang Gunak, who looked no less furious.
"According to my information, this was supposed to be their first meeting."
"If Dojang was a beggar before, how could he have met a child from the Tang Clan's collateral line? The bastard is three years younger than him."
"No idea."
From the open window came a voice that had become so hateful lately.
"Hyung-nim!! I bought wine! Though I ran out of money, but let's go rob some bandits!"
"Let's go!"
"...Are they aware they're stealing from their own?" Im Sobyeong muttered in exhaustion.
"Madness attracts."
Perhaps... they deserve each other.
Sometimes is just me, a little dirty bit of paper, a pencil as large as my little finger and my dying pens against my love for Cheongmyeong
I have a tendency to draw him tilting his head, it seems...
He is always described with a "crooked posture" and also weak/feeble looking (? Is hilarious, I love him in unexplainable ways, he's just a cutie, an evil grandpa inside a young handsome body

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AAAAAAAAA I CAN'T NEVER GET ENOUGH OF CHEONGMYEONG BEING RESPECTFUL
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA OH MY GOD HE IS SOOO GREAT<3<3<3
He's fucking brutal and he isn't kind, but oh my god, he doesn't humilliate those who address him with respect. It makes me think about his friendship with Tang Bo and his closeness with Baek Cheon and Yu Iseol in particular, also Tang Gunak and the convivence with Meng So
Everyone in the novel that has some honor gets that respected, i looooove ittttt, even i think in the crypt? When he makes his first kill and one of those martial artist confronts him doing his best, even that one got recognized and died proud about that, i wish we had more moments like those in the future, but i don't think the theme of the novel from now on is going to allow it:(
ship art and one tang bo (he got lost)
oMG THE CHEEK BITTING IS SO CUTEEEE
I LOVE THIS ART, LOOKS SO SOFT AND SWEET
I have been rereading! I'm at the Shaolin Tournament again!!<3
I'm having so much fun, too much fun at that- I'm cackling fOR REAL OH MY GOD ANFKAFNSKDNJSJD
What fuck ass Dominant CEO lines are that???
Why does Hyun Jong gets Y/N moments?? I'm literally screaming, Heo Do Jinin stop looking at our sect leader, I get that he was rejuvenated by the pill but this is not ok, unhand him
"Such an interesting person" is such a characteristic line for any fucking drama and romantic manhwa ML, i'm dying, i didn't remember this in my first read xDDDD
Light spoilers! But I do remember another moment when the alliance was announced to the world and someone tried to insult him and Tang Gunak and Meng So we're so protective of him skdKADKAJS i envy him fr
HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I JUST NEED EVERY MOMENT CHEONGMYEONG TALKS/THINKS ABOUT HOW MUCH HE LOVES HIS HOME
THIS JUST MELTS ME SO FAST, IT MAKES ME SO SOFT THAT HE HAS A PLACE TO WHERE HE BELONGS
This fandoms has too little fics where Cheongmyeong is some kind of spirit of Hwasan, i need him as a young god , caNONICALLY CIVILIANS CONFUSE HIM WITH A DEITY, PLEASE, PLEASE
(Chapter 1555)
OH MY GOD PLEASE SOMEONE THINK ABOUT ITTTTT, i saw him in ao3 as a dragon twice, as a calamity once, is an spirit twice too i think? Anyway, that's TOO LITTLE, MORE MORE MORE
CHEONGMYEONG AS IN CLEAR SKIES, AS THE HEAVENS AND UNDERSTANDING AND THE SPRING THAT COMES AFTER THE LONG WINTER
CHEONGMYEONG GREEN TEA CHEONGMYEONG GREEN TEAAA SAJHDVFHTJDGVAB
He's so cute, i can'tttt
I have been watching a lot of those tiktok chinese dramas and now i'm cackling at the mental image of Cheongmyeong all like "it was my fault! I didn't meant toooo" annoying and too sugary, clinging to someone's arm, fake crying, jesus
I like to think about him learning these things when he goes alone to wander the world, even before knowing Tang Bo, like that sidestory where he meets the founder of the Eunha Guild and the child is like "i'm an orphan" and Cheongmyeong is like "oh, hi! Me too:D"
Imagine him just for some reason seeing a couple of women trying to ruin(?) eachother without fighting while he eats in the background. He just getting more and more exasperated by how they twist words and don't fight honorably(??) and then comes the husband or whatever anD HE BELIEVES THE MOST FAKE ONE and Cheongmyeong is ?? wondering what the fuck happened
I think he should watch this happen a couple of times before finding the pattern, and then, when people do this to Cheong Mun (since the sect leaders are always the ugliest geen teas), Cheongmyeong is like "i get it now!" and becomes able to counter like this
"Retreating to advance" he says, all proud.
"How do you even know that strategy?" Cheong Jin looks at him all incredulous, because he only knows that from books written by famous strategist and generals.
"I guess i'm just that smart hehehe"

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I have been craving BaekCheong, girl, but like... Cheongmyeong falls first, you know? There's so much where Baek Cheon falls first and is pinning around and i love that but i'm stressed af these days and i need these two chaotic idiots being happy, i think everything is funnier if Cheongmyeong is the one all worried for feeling things and having to sort it out by himself first (without torturing Baek Cheon with the uncertainty)
The worst thing you can do to me is those fics where Baek Cheon is so in love with Cheongmyeong but that dude isn't over Tang Bo and that one is even still dead, i'm going to kms at least revive him, pleASE
I actually am also sightly insane for an idea i myself had in a sleep deprivation hallucination where Cheongmyeong falls in love with Baek Cheon and they get together all shyly because Cheongmyeong, for all he can do and knows, is only familiar with the worst of humanity but he doesn't know about those soft feelings and forms of affection, Baek Cheon is the one more emotionally intelligent, so he keeps expressing love in all the ways he can so Cheongmyeong can choose which ones he likes best
And then he keeps reflecting on this and how much he loves Baek Cheon and how weird is using that word for that feeling because is unlike anything he ever felt but he knows how to love because he loved Cheong Mun and Jin as his family and Hwasan as his home and...
And Tang Bo.
And that's the thing. He did love before but he didn't care, he didn't understand it, he barely even demostrated it. (TangCheong here can be unilateral or bilateral as you like) He doubts Tang Bo ever considered, suspected it, nothing, they were friends and brothers and the closest person to each other, but...
Is only now, until Baek Cheon, that Cheongmyeong can say that he knows how to love. To care, to protect and be protected. Baek Cheon tries to find him halfway everytime and even in this new relationship he's the one teaching Cheongmyeong and taking all his firsts. All of these moments that belong only to Baek Cheon now and he loves him loves him loves him so much.
And now he knows he loved Tang Bo too and it hurts so fucking much because is one more thing that he wasted in his first life like the time to train and every word of his sahyung, but also is so funny and stupid to realice now that he loved him and Tang Bo didn't notice either because he was supposed to be more emotionally aware that Cheongmyeong but is clear now that they both were two halves of the same idiot, none of them doing anything about those feelings, such children they were.
He has Baek Cheon now and he likes the closeness and their similarities and their differences, he likes that Baek Cheon cares so much for his hair and his beautiful face and even more beautiful sword and his stuborness and his eternally honeyed lips. He likes him when he's clean and brave and when he's a mess and stupid because his heart is pure and Cheongmyeong can trust him to point a path in the dark, even if it isn't the best one, but towards the correct place.
Tang Bo is a memory tinted pink now, a first love and he must be laughing so annoyingly in the heavens knowing that. But Cheongmyeong somehow is glad to not miss him for that, even if Baek Cheon can't replace Tang Bo, the truth is that Tang Bo can't dull nor overshadow the vision of Baek Cheon now before him.
Or something like that idk my mind is a mess heLP ME all interspersed with scenes where Baek Cheon and Cheongmyeong hold hands and get drunk and, specifically before the moment Cheongmyeong finally conects that he loved Tang Bo, a moment where Baek Cheon buys him another green ribbon because he bought one for himself and the vendor had one in that expensive-looking green that they seem to find only in Sichuan and thought that it would look nice in Cheongmyeong since he likes green and Cheongmyeong is all like oh fucking hell why do you torture me like this and Baek Cheon is like the fuck are you talking about and then Cheongmyeong goes to complain about it to Cheong Jin and cuts there
The scenes should be only about moments with Baek Cheon, there can be other people, but not flashbacks of the past to keep it ambiguous, only Cheongmyeong using brain cells around Baek Cheon and suffering about it
Oh my god i wrote this but not my fucking paper i need someone to end me oh my goooooddddd
midnight visitor
I just read again the Tang Clan arc and look at these silly faces
In my headcanons the Tang Clan genetically can't give big smiles, soft smiles are ok, sometimes a little loopsided but cute- but big smiles are always too crooked, tense or with too much teeth, they forget to squint their eyes, excessively evil looking for an expression of joy(? Even when they are actually happy
Only a couple of people every generation smiles like normal humans, and those are considered rare beauties, like Tang Bo and Soso
I completely forgot that Soso was this cool in the beginning, in the webcomic she's gasping and wheezing, but in the novel she was running and brewing tea
She's such a noble lady, i love her so much.
Something i noticed since my first read and find endlessly endearing is how she is really representing feminity in the novel.
Yu Iseol does not represent feminity. She's a woman alright, but that's it(?) It doesn't really impacts her because she doesn't identify with her genre but with her purpose ("don't think of me as a woman"), she's a soldier in that sense, androgynous! She has no closeness to neither men or women (the novel says that she has sagos) and doesn't care about how others percieve her. Once Cheongmyeong comes to the picture, even the ones that percieved her as "the prettiest girl" forget that because she acts openly crazy xD and is one of the strongest. Even at the times she encounters sexism (either hostile or condescendig), it doesn't matter differently that the clasism everyone from Hwasan encounters
But all of that matters to Soso!
Soso is the real and only girl representation because she deals with problems that no one else cares nor have no idea about in the novel like the marriage thing, the filial piety she owes to Tang Gunak, the use of her own personhood to honour her clan, the meaning of her appearance in politics and socializing, the fact that she recognizes Yu Iseol as some kind of love rival (social dynamics no one else knows), even in late chapters things like sexism from the Namgung or how people percieves her since she changed her appearance- she notices those things and responds to it.
Even when she is a really good fighter, her priority is her caring role as a physician (a little agressive, bur caring anyway). That's also why she's better that anyone at letting others protect her, she knows where her strengths excels and that the battle extends beyond the enemy's presence. She's not a soldier, she may be a fighter, but her identity goes beyond the sword, it includes the life she protects and saves, her community, her family (both the blood one and the choosen one)
Also she's a girls's girl, a daddy's girl and an older sister, she's so girly, i love her soooo. I like to think that Yu Iseol sees her and comes to like the fact that she's also a woman, that their friendship/relationship (either anyone takes them as a romantic ship or not) is different from the way they live with the boys because Soso teaches her to be affectionate physically, to care for her hair and that even if being a women doesn't make them stronger than men, it also doesn't make them less
(Also as a headcanon- i just love the idea of Soso being a full lesbian, even when she was pursuing Cheongmyeong, she was doing BUSINESS!! But she doesn't consider Cheongmyeong can be uninterested in women because she couldn't be uninterested either. She's like "women are more attractive than men, everyone thinks the same, amirite?" "no, Soso, some people actually like men" "ew why")
Idk dude i just love my girls, they're so precious, i remember being indignated in the webcomic when everyone was supposed to be there and Yu Iseol was behind some letters, stop, she's a ghost alright, let her fade in the background i guess, but you can't do that to Soso!
Behold indeed
Oh my fucking god, those ARE BRANCHES
THOSE ARE LITERALLY PLUM TREES WITHOUT FLOWERS
THEY'RE LIKE BLOOD STAINING THE EDGES OF HIS CLOTHES I'M KMS
He has two hands tho, theory about the profanation of Geomjon's body rebuffed!

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Today my mind is being consumed by the thought that, before the war, Cheongmyeong must have the most beautiful sword ever.
I have been collecting fighting descriptions in the novel and a recurring theme is that Hwasan's sword is dazzling, striking and magnificent, feints with beautiful and swift movements, not too fast but seeming fantastical
However, any narrative of people seeing Cheongmyeong fighting seriously is like "terrifying, desesperante, suicidal", he fights with everything in the line, for his life and everyone that depends on him. His sword in the second life is lethal and violent, still perfect but that's only appreciated when he wants to show something
He says that he had to reinvent himself and everything he knew about martial arts in the war. It physically hurts me to think about his beautiful technique being overwhelmed by the violence and dying itself of the brutality needed to survive, he, scared and desperate to change and learn and keep on...
Thinking about Geomjon... Without an arm... I love him...
SOMEONE SAID THAT THE BEADS IN THEIR BELTS COULD BE THEIR REINCARNATIONS
MY THEORIES GETTING STRONGERRRR
I'm actually so feral for this art, there are so many things that i waNT TO TALK ABOUUUUTTTT
WHAT IS THE BLACK SUN IN THE SKY??? THE ENLIGHTEMENT????
Some are saying that this is Geomjon's body but i actually don't think so because why that one would be preserved? We can't see the left arm, but idk, the lack of arm wasn't mentioned and he was described a little in his new appearances, so- he also is supposed to be reincarnated in another body, i like the beads thing more!!
The fact that they're in a pool of blood is making me sick, we can't lose anyone from the main cast or i'm jumping out the window, i will take a little maiming tho!! That's sexy in a war context!!!
WHY IS CHEON MA SO BIG?? OR IS CHEONGMYEONG THAT LITTLE???? I NEED TO EAT HIMMMM
I feel like there is some symbolism with their clothes- pure white? Isn't that for mourning or the dead? He's soooo pale too!! Is this his final life? He has feelings?? He's taking revenge or something? Cheongmyeong describes him as empty and eerly calm, we don't know any of his motivations
The little decoration of his robes looks like blood but i also saw someone ask if those were like tree branches or roots? That would imply some sort of conection with Hwasan?? I can't fucking see more clearly, help. It also worries me in a way that in the cover with Jang Ilso, they're back to back, like... well, they were enemies, their worldviews opposed, they didn't see eachother face to face but in this they're almost shoulder to shoulder, looking their eyes, i'm so excited for any psychological development for Cheongmyeong even if it's for the worse(?
Sarotati pointed to me that Cheon Ma's hand is on Cheongmyeong's shoulder TnT the one that he lost as Geomjon, i don't think that arm will be cut off again, but that could either mean some sort of threat, the fact that he remembers the past or Cheongmyeong getting some metaphorical "limb" cut off like all these people that works as his hands or extensions of himself
I like the detail of his hair almost like smoke, i guess that means something about his dark arts, but i also now headcanon him as wavy haired, so handsome...
THEY'RE FIGHTING SO CLOSE IN THIS LIFE THO, IS CHEON MA WEAKER??? PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE NERF THAT MAN I DO NOT LIKE THAT HE ISN'T TOUCHING THE GROUND, BRING THAT MAN DOOOWWNNNNNN