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How can you allow someone to choose to resist love. But then choose this to love a stranger?

How can a woman lure you back to cheat on you twice in a row. She tells me she's sleepy instead of telling me she has another man over. It's like she wants your cake and eat it too. But wants to just use me as a disposable cup. This last time was the final straw I broke the camel's back. I lost love for her and respect. I feel like she needs to respect yourself and be comfortable alone instead of confiding in strangers bringing my children in greater risk for something bad. I don't think she loves herself she chooses to withdraw for me when she gets close only to get close to a stranger. How could I continue co-parenting without emotions with her?