WE WOULD BE ANGELS

there’s two components of his experience with it: — a high libido compared to your average citizen — a compulsive pursuit of sexual encounters

he does ... have a need to get off on a really regular basis. a very high sex drive. which feeds into the latter thing - the repeated pursuit of people he can sleep with. when it comes down to it, if dimi’s needs aren’t being met, he’ll sleep with another version of himself (unless it’s part of a scene, masturbation doesn’t ‘count’ for him, it’s just not enough), but the real meat of the issue is in pursuing others. he uses sex as a means of improving his mood, as something to do when he’s bored, as something he needs to do, etc etc. he can come up with an excuse for any of it, but he’ll claim it ultimately comes down to “i wanted to”

dimi’s . god complex plays into this, to an extent. he sees himself as above and better than (almost) everyone and ... “can i sleep with this person (to meet my needs)?” is more important than whether or not he actually wants to sleep with that particular person. dimi’s idea of attraction is very abstract anyway, but there’s really only a couple of people he’s ever felt genuine attraction to. it’s very much a game, after a point. a compulsive game, for sure, and one he has to play — like it’s a challenge

within certain boundaries, he will also not turn down anyone who expresses interest. there are certain moral qualms dimitri has (standard things, like, i shouldn’t have to say ‘dimi won’t sleep with someone who’s underage or intoxicated’ but rpc can be so nasty that i feel like i have to clarify: dimi isn’t a nasty evil motherfucker), and he needs enthusiastic consent (despite the fact he’s frequently bored during sex himself), but - overall he very rarely says no

he can’t say no. like he can’t pass up the chance to pursue someone who might be interested. it’s entirely compulsive to him; in a recent discord thread i have, dimi made reference to seeing if he could get his lawyer to sleep with him — and now that dimi’s had that thought, he has to follow it up and try to sleep w his lawyer, to see if he can follow through?

so . he’s definitely had encounters with a lot of people that he’s not actually attracted to or even actively finds unattractive, and even though they haven’t been satisfying encounters they’ve still counted for him

he’s 300 years old and never had anyone criticise or try to correct his behaviour, so it’s completely ingrained as normal for him, which makes things ... more difficult. he has never known any different way of doing things and no one has ever stopped him and said “hey this isn’t healthy”, so he’s never considered it as anything other than the way he’s wired - in spite of the fact he most certainly gets fractious and antsy if he’s not able to have Enough sex

he rarely has safe sex. part of his compulsion pushes that down as something that’s not important. it’s more important to have sex than to be not-risky about it.