Passive Me Aggressive You

desired confidence level: Titus Andromedon’s founding father hair-flip.

Did I ask you For attention When affection Is what I need?

I need you to break my heart. I’m holding my arms out wide–take me on, tell me everything you think you’re too nice to say. I’m so tired of this back and forth, the constant threat of maybe, the alluring doubt in cast-off glances. I can either die slowly, by a thousand tiny cuts, as you slip further and further away. Or I can get a clean break, sharp and absolute, like the crack of a rifle in the Texas blue. Loving you feels like drowning, but I’d rather go with the firing squad. Hot bullets and a burst of pain, then silence. The only way I’m going to be able to put myself back together is if I fall apart completely. And right now–my heart is hanging on by a thread. You’re pulling me in and casting me out again, weaving yourself into a million memories, scenes on a tapestry of us. And I’m so done with slow burning, and the way you make me feel like you’ve cut off my air. I’m so tired of hoping and waiting and then swallowing down the nausea of despair. If I’m going to fail, if I’m going to burn out, let it be glorious. Let this be bright, an explosion in the sky. Let my heart break with a shockwave that flattens everyone else for miles. Let my pain be sharp and stinging and rending and absolute. Please, I’m begging you. Tell me it’s all a lie. Tell me you never cared and you always wanted someone else and I’m wrong about everything. Strike right here, where it hurts the most. Please, Love, let me go. Break my heart.