What she says: I'm fine.
What she's thinking about: Hands down, Mimi Miney has the sickest, most-twisted fate of any AA character. I think that case gets forgotten a bunch but like, damn. You're a nurse who has just been named in a malpractice case along with your shit ass boss where you've accidentally killed your patients. Your career, self-image, and perhaps entire life are ruined. But that's just the tip of the iceberg.
You're speeding down the highway one night with your beloved sister in the passenger's seat. You crash the car. Flames and mangled metal engulf you. You manage to crawl out broken and burned beyond all recognition. She does not. She dies from her burns and wounds. You don't know if it was instant or slow and agonizing. You pass out before you can process what's happened, barely alive. When the paramedics come they can't figure out who you are. You've been so horribly disfigured that they will have to do serious facial reconstruction. You're still in a coma, so they look in your wallet for ID. There is only one photo.
Months later, you wake up in the hospital. Your skin is bandaged and you can't really remember what happened. The doctors walk in to greet you, "Good morning Ms Miney." They tell you the date and the state of your condition. The fog clears from your mind as you ask "Where is my sister? Is she alright?". They take a deep breath in and tell you of your sister's fate. "She did not survive the crash." You are overwhelmed with tears. This can't be happening. No. She's gone. You killed her. She's gone because of you. You scream in agony. You can feel the fire on your skin again. "We are so sorry". You wail with grief. You are the older one, the responsible one, the one who is supposed to take care of her. First your patients, now the one you love more than anything in this life. Your care is destructive. You are destructive. Are you a murderer? You cry out to a god you don't believe in, begging to take her place. If only it could have been you instead of her. You would give anything just to see her face again.
"Mimi has been cremated. Her ashes have been left to you." They couldn't even wait for you to say goodbye. Wait. Did they just call her Mimi? You attempt to stop crying long enough to respond. "Th-thank you. Can I just, be alone for a minute?" They nod, eyes fully of pity, "Of course, take all the time you need." You try to breathe, taking in the room. You look at the different tubes that have been stuck in to you to keep you alive. You resist the urge to rip them out and end it all. You look at the mirror on the wall to see how burned you really are. Your eyes widen. You must be dreaming. This can't be right. Ini. That's Ini's face. Your heart races. Maybe it's a window and the doctors lied to you. Maybe she's just fine. She looks to be in about the same shape as you are. You wave and Ini waves back. You break into tears of joy. So does she. Perhaps god is real after all. "I'm so glad you're okay" you say in unison. You ask each other a how you are and answer the same. Ha! What? She's as shocked as you are. The doctors must've lied to you both. "I love you so much." Unison, again! You call the doctors back in and ask them to explain. "We understand that this is traumatic but we've been telling the truth."
"But the window?"
"It's a mirror."
"But my sister!"
"Is no longer with us."
"But she's right there!"
"I know this is hard to take in, but that is your reflection, Ini."
"No!"
"WHAT!?"
"Mimi is gone."
You start crying again, tears of anger and frustration. What the fuck are they saying? YOU are Mimi. SHE is Ini. The face in the glass is Ini's. It couldn't be yours.
"That's. Not. My. FACE!" You all but spit at them.
"We are sorry. This is the best we could do with photo references available at the time."
"What the FUCK do you MEAN!" You growl, trying to keep your stomach from sinking further.
"You were burned so severely you needed intense facial reconstruction. We used a photo found in your wallet for reference."
"Oh."
You begin to understand now. God heard your cry and made a cruel joke of it.
"I see."
You only keep one photo in your wallet, a picture of the person you love most. Your ray of sunshine. Your little sister Ini. You start to laugh at the bitter irony. They gave you her face. Now you have to choose. You could be honest and hope they believe you, only to face about a dozen charges of manslaughter. Or, you could go along with it all. Embody her. You know her backwards and forwards. You could do it. Maybe you can get some revenge along the way. You'll just have to live as the constant reminder of the one dearest to you who died by your hand. You feel numb. You have nothing left to lose. You lie.
"Of course! I like, totally get it now. I think?..."
You trail off and attempt to look lost in thought. The doctors leave. You can feel the sobs well up in your throat as soon as they shut the door. You keel over in your hospital bed. This is a new kind of despair, one that no one has ever felt before. Your body is now a special prison made just for you. Perhaps death would have been easier. It's not too late to reveal yourself, but the shame? You must keep your story secret. You must take what you deserve while you can. Maybe one day when you've done enough, you can hang yourself. You don't really believe in an afterlife, but if there is one, your little sister would at least be in heaven. After all that has happened, you aren't scared of hell. You're already in it.
