never grow up

If that task sounded daunting to the oblivious boy, he’d boost his confidence to make it sound like an achievable, worthwhile endeavor. “But you know both Tink and Wendy really well!” Which was true—Peter didn’t lack knowledge of his friends, only the ability to actually think things through. “So next time, just try to think about what they’d each want, instead of what you want?” Eh, hard sell for someone so self-concerned? “Just once in a while! So if it’s something Tink would really appreciate, and Wendy wouldn’t mind going second, do it that way—or vice versa. Then it just keeps things balanced.” For all our sakes, please learn to keep the balance. Unless…

He hadn’t admitted it aloud yet, but he’d thought about prioritizing his feelings for Wendy for some time now. And he’d thought about Tink too.. It was a complicated web that Peter had been tangled in, having to make a choice that would affect their entire group, which was why he’d been stringing them both along for so long now. How could he explain to Nibs that, no matter who he chose, they would have to learn the truth about Peter and his immortality? The big secret he’d been holding to his chest would have to be revealed, and everything would change. There was a chance that all of them would see him differently.

It felt harder to confess this to Tink than to Wendy. They’d known each other far longer; would she hate him for never telling her sooner? Or was she going to hate him regardless, if he chose Wendy? Was he doomed no matter what? Nibs suggested Peter keep things balanced, but his lingering secret and inevitable choice kept them off balance no matter what. He sighed, frustrated but not at Nibs. 

“Not too fast,” he repeated as a promise, nodding his head before taking off again. Peter didn’t speed up right away like anyone would have expected him to, instead speeding up slowly to not scare Wendy. Despite wanting to go faster, he was enjoying this, the feeling of Wendy’s arms wrapped around him. He made sure to check in on her again once they were at a stoplight. 

“Are you loving it?” He asked with a childish grin through the left mirror, though the helmet made it hard to see. “I hope you’re ready — we’re gonna do a bit of off-roading!” Before she could protest or question where he was taking them, the light turned green, and Peter was taking off again. This time going a little faster, he took a random turn onto a dirt road that was leading them to the lost boys' clubhouse.

“Poor Tink,” Nibs said, automatically sympathizing with how she must have felt. He obviously hadn’t been around for her to vent to that day, and she had seemingly been in good spirits afterwards—so who knew how Peter had managed to lift her mood—but Nibs still knew her well enough to know how much that must have sucked for her in the moment. “She was way more excited than Wendy was when you got the bike. She offered to do any repairs or upgrades you’d need. Of course she wanted the first ride. It's not that complicated, Peter.” It’s common sense. Nibs wasn’t as frustrated as he could get trying to teach Duke about social awareness; right now, he was genuinely just baffled by Peter’s lack.

“Well, she never said anything,” Peter defended himself stupidly, as if it made it any better. He knew that Tink was more excited than Wendy, but for Peter the first ride hadn’t been about who was more excited; it was a game to him, for he’d found amusement in convincing Wendy to take the ride despite her obvious hesitance. Tink had been too eager, whereas Wendy’s hesitation gave Peter a challenge. Now that he saw Nibs’ reaction to the news though, the lost boy wondered if he had made a mistake.

Reaching the exit out to the roof, Michael walked through the doorway before settling himself down. He had to admit, getting some fresh air after being inside for a while felt rather nice. He enjoyed the view of the island from up here was well. “Yeah, it’s a pretty decent day.” The brunette replied, allowing his gaze to focus on their surroundings. “Actually, kind of sad that we have to be stuck inside all day when it’s this nice out— well, sad I have to be stuck inside all day. At least you get to be outside.” 

Peter sat beside Michael as he listened, smiling sympathetically. “I’d much rather be up here than down here,” Peter admitted, his gaze going toward the sidewalk. “But maybe you could try to take one of my shifts one day! You ever thought about sign flipping before?”

Whether he was seeking advice or comfort after his explanation, all she could offer was, “Change is the only thing that stays the same. You’ll come to terms with that the longer you live. I know that doesn’t make it easy, but…you don’t have to make it harder on yourself.” And what she meant by that was, “Being upset about it won’t fix it. It only makes you upset.” He should focus on trying to enjoy the time he still had left with his friends, rather than wish to keep them from growing and moving on with their natural lifespans.

Her advice made sense, but Peter wasn’t really sure what to do with it. He hadn’t even said out loud that he was upset, but Tiger Lily was good at picking up on those types of things without it even being said. He almost considered asking So how do I not be upset then? but another more important question crossed his mind. “... What if I already upset other people in the process of all this?”

Hence, he didn’t feel an ounce of guilt over the hard to rely on comment he just made. “And what about breakfast?” The younger suddenly questioned, staring back at Peter with a blank look on his face. Fine, they can solve their dinner issue with pizza, but no food inside the fridge meant there being nothing for them to eat for breakfast— hell, they didn’t even have a box of cereal to eat with water since there wasn’t any milk! What was Peter planning on doing about that then? Order more pizza for breakfast? Yeah, they may be a house filled of guys, but he definitely wasn’t about to eat any of that in the morning. “Go right ahead and order the pizza— remember that Duke likes pineapple on his pizza so order half a pie with it on them, the wings too. Four orders, they go by quickly even with two less mouths to feed in here.” Benji nodded his head, giving the older the go-ahead as he crossed his arms. “We solved the issue for dinner, but what are you planning on doing for the morning? Are you going to go as soon as the grocery store opens to shop or are you going to wait until later on in the day? Because if it’s the second option, than we’re out of luck for breakfast still.” 

At the mention of breakfast, Peter glanced at the clock on the stove for the first time since waking up. He genuinely hadn’t realized it was still early enough for breakfast; had he really woken up early today? Still, he had a simple solution for everything. “Right, breakfast… I’ll get us some donuts!” He decided, knowing the donut shop was just a few minutes away and open early for business. “Donuts for breakfast, pizza for lunch and dinner. You can even come with me to pick out the best ones. Then tomorrow, groceries as promised.”

“Yeah, I feel that,” Slightly agreed, smiling at Peter now. I feel infinite. He got it now. Endless possibilities and opportunities from here on out. The only thing that wasn’t infinite was the years they had left, though Sly still didn’t feel old—he had plenty of time ahead of him for everything he wanted to do in life. But he did feel older. His birthday was in just a week and a half, the scheduled move-in for his and Cubby’s new apartment only a few days after that, and the way it was all stacked up like that right at the beginning of the new year made it feel like everything was changing so suddenly—even if they’d been planning this for a while, and his birthday happened the same time every year. He just felt like…most years he didn’t feel himself growing up, even as his age changed. This one was a marked change from all his past birthdays, as he could sense a real shift in maturity and responsibility.

“The only thing that kinda sucks about moving on and up is what you leave behind,” he mused, his smile fading as he reflected on what it would be like to live without the majority of his brothers for the first time in his life. He knew he and Cubby would be happy with their own place, but it would still be bittersweet, saying goodbye to the rest. “Not that I won’t still see you guys all the time,” he added quickly, lest Peter think he really meant to leave anyone behind. “But don’t you ever wish things could change and stay the same at the same time?”

Still, Slightly felt similar to what Peter did as he mentioned leaving things behind. Peter nodded in understanding, agreeing. In a sense, things had already slowly been changing but staying the same for a while now — it was only as time continued that things would really change, and the only thing that would be the same from here on out was himself. There wasn’t exactly a right way to put that into words though, not without getting too deep into it. “Always,” Peter answered his question. He wished time would just stop right here, actually. They could all be happy and live in peace, not have to worry about what the future holds or what could potentially be lost in time. “Life is sort of cruel like that,” he continued, “Leaving us wishing for what can’t be.” He wasn’t trying to damper the night with his longing, though. Tonight was a night for celebrations. “But we don’t need to worry about any of that right now,” he perked up suddenly. “Right now, I’m just glad we’re all together tonight. Like a big family.”

As he promised to go slow, going as far as to give her a scouts honor to reassure the severity of his promise, Wendy chuckled. “You’ve never even been a scout before.” She commented, yet it was evident on her face how charmed and endeared she was by him. How can she say no to his scouts honor? He positioned himself against his bike, only to then pat against the seat behind them, gesturing her to sit down herself. “You might regret saying that. I may not look like it, but I do have quite the grip when it comes down to it.” The brunette lightly smiled before she took a seat behind him. Wendy then slipped on the helmet he had given her perviously over her head, only to them wrap her arms around Peter’s torso. “Okay, I’m ready.” She said, leaning against his back with a slight nod.

She hopped up from the couch, pulling Peter along with her, hurrying him impatiently as if she hadn’t been the one holding out for the past few minutes. "Where are we going?" The where didn't matter so much as the going, but she wondered if he actually had anything in mind or if they were going to figure it out along the way.

“You tell me,” Peter answered as they quickly put their shoes on and began heading out the door, “Just say the word and we’re there.” He knew better than to suggest where he’d just been with Wendy, the old clubhouse on the outskirts of the isle that was special to all of them, but he wouldn't oppose either if that was where Tink really wanted to go. “The world is our oyster.”

That was an understatement. Nibs wasn’t sure Peter’s devices should always be allowed even with supervision. He was always more diplomatic when dealing with the older boy than to say as much, though—for all Peter’s faults, he was still Peter. “Did something happen?” Nibs asked, avoiding the more accusatory, What did you do?

It was a slow day at work, and barely any customers were coming in, resulting in Michael just lounging about as he leaned against the counter. The brunette exhaled loudly, blowing some air and flopping the front parts of his hair into going upwards as he did so. He was bored. With the lack of customers, that gave him little to do while he worked, and unfortunately, he couldn’t call out for the day just because things were super slow. And normally, Michael wouldn’t mind the slow to nonexistent influx of people, as days where not many customers had came through happened many times before. Only difference was, is that back then, it wasn’t mainly just him working here. Nope! Back then, the youngest Darling had all of his brothers working alongside him, and when they all were here they always made dull days such as this one into fun and exciting ones that helped kill the time. But once all of his brothers with the exception of John had decided to move out into a place of their own, little by little, each of them quit working here and found jobs elsewhere, leaving Michael left here all on his own.

Well, he wasn’t exclusively alone. At the sound of Peter’s voice, the youngest Darling lifted himself up from the counter and glanced at his direction. Peter then repeated his question about heading to the roof, and for a second Michael considered it. He knew that neither of them should leave their post in case a customer did walk in. But then again, the day has been slow and only two people has came in so far…..with his mind settled, the brunette shrugged. “Sure, I could use some fresh air.” 

He smiled as Michael agreed, motioning for him to follow as he led him to the door that gave them access to the roof. Peter flew rather than walking up the stairs, holding the door open for the youngest before following him out. He inhaled deeply as he took in the fresh air; though he spent most of his shifts outside anyway as the designated sign flipper, the view on the roof was much better than out on the sidewalk below. Plus, now he had some company. Peter let out a sigh as he stuck his hands on his hips, taking in the view. “It’s such a beautiful day, isn’t it?”