Paffages

The corrections room has a number of errors printed in the bibles.

The corrections room also has a number of errors due to paffages being a stupid exhibit which does not pay attention to its artifacts.

This room has errors printed in the bibles, and the bibles are opened to different typos so that everyone can look around and enjoy it and laugh about how silly humans are or get upset because THE BIBLE DOESN'T MAKE MISTAKES, etc.

In OKC, the first location of the exhibit, we did not initially tell anyone where the errors were. The patrons (AND THE EMPLOYEES) were left on their own to try to find the mistakes. After a while, SOMEONE FINALLY came and told us workers where the errors were, so we could help the patrons. Of course, then they told us that we were not supposed to talk to the patrons about the artifacts because "we are not the experts, Dr. Scott is [the voice on the ipods that the patrons are given] and so they should listen to HIM," not us... but the point is, eventually we were told where the errors.

Except that we weren't.

You see, some of the bibles are NOT opened to the errors that we were told. In fact, 4 of the bibles are the problems. One "mistake" that we were informed about was not, in fact, a mistake. One was opened to a completely different section of the bible from what we were told. etc.

We made notes about this.

That was over a year ago, and 2 cities ago in this tour.

Paffages now has the errors printed so that the patrons can find the mistakes easier.

And yet...

they never corrected the errors-that-are-not-errors/not-open-to-the-correct-page problems.

There is a bible known as the "Wife-beater bible". This isn't the joke.

The bible contains a marginal note at I Pet. 3:7 which states “And if she be not obediente and healpful unto hym, endevoureth to beate the fere of God into her heade, that thereby she may be compelled to learne her dutye and do it.”

This is in our corrections room, even though this isn't technically a "typo". The printer intended to include this. Of course, it is an issue of interpretation, and we have a whole spiel about this artifact. It's great, usually gets a good laugh, and we move on.

One day, I was showing a few women around the corrections room, and I pointed this error out.

Paffages is now offering guided tours.

Let me clarify for you, Paffages is touring. It was initially in OKC for like, 8 months? And then it was in Atlanta for about 8 months? Something like that? Now it has been in Charlotte for at least 5 months, and it will be here longer still. Apparently, after 2 locations and completed contracts, followed by getting HALF WAY THROUGH the contract in another location, Paffages has finally decided that these people coming in to their exhibit might need some guidance. [The average self-guided tour according to Paffages pr: 2 hours. The ACTUAL average self-guided tour: 5 hours]

SO! Tours!

Here's the rules:

A group has to have a scheduled trip of 15 people or more to have a tour.

We must have at least 2 weeks notice of this group.

The only people who are allowed to give these tours are the 3 managers.

Here's what pisses me off about this: Those groups? What the hell? You're telling me that on days when we have 6 people walk in the exhibit, we can't help them out and tell them what to look at?

TWO WEEKS NOTICE BEFORE YOU'LL EXPLAIN THIS EXHIBIT TO A PERSON? I'm sorry, screw you. I was in this exhibit 2 cities ago, DISAPPEARED HOPING NEVER TO SEE IT AGAIN, and then started working in it once more, and I STILL have every single artifact memorized. If you need that much prep time to tell people about the exhibit, YOU SHOULD NOT BE A MANAGER.

Speaking of: I am the only person who works in/for that exhibit (INCLUDING THE MANAGERS, MY GOD) who knows who killed William Tyndale. And we have an animatronic Tyndale being strangled/burned at the stake. The majority of the workers believe that Henry VIII killed Tyndale, and the ones who don't think that do not care who killed Tyndale. It is REALLY IMPORTANT TO KNOW WHO KILLED HIM, ESPECIALLY SINCE WE SHOW HIM BEING KILLED.

I just

Nothing makes me happier than when I can tell someone that they are wrong while at Paffages.

Even BETTER is that moment when I can do it and know that I'm following all of the rules of the exhibit, so they can't even get mad at me for it.

So 1611 was the first edition (/first printing) of the King James translation of the Bible. People always come running in, saying "YES THIS THIS IS THE REAL BIBLE THE 1611 THIS ONE IS THE BIBLE!" And that's my moment. My shining glory. The happiest time of my life.

"Well, actually, you don't read the 1611 King James Bible."

"Yes I do. The King James Translation is the one true translation."

"Okay, well if you've noticed, we have these bibles known as the "He" Bible and the "She" bible? [explains the difference, see Ruth 3:15] So really, you could argue that you read the 1613 edition, at best. But in actuality, unless your King James translation includes the Apocrypha, you are reading the 1666 AT BEST. And really, the "Official King James" translation, the edition that all other King James bibles can be traced back to, the one that was "error free"/all of the verses were in the "correct" places, the one with the most research and the one that was deemed "OFFICIAL" wasn't until the mid 1700s. Just so you know, King James himself died in 1625, to put that in perspective for you."

In case you didn't know, King James the first of England was a Protestant. Not a Catholic.

I know that our exhibit is INTENTIONALLY misleading as to James' faith, but I just wanted to clarify that he was, in fact, a Protestant.

Apparently, nobody who works with passages remembered (remembered) the 5th of November.

You know, the gunpowder treason and plot?

Let's look at a picture for a moment

"What's wrong with Saint Jerome? Why isn't he moving?"

"Uh, Saint Jerome is tired today, sorry."

"What's wrong with Louie the lion?"

Saint Jerome has the voice of a 20 year old, a stroke arm, and he recites Girl Scout songs.

There is a lot that I can say about the room with King James in it, but I'll leave this one to the portrait and the title of the room.

There is a conversation happening in this room at all times. There are voices recorded who are discussing the possible meaning of the word "ecclesia" [and the possible PRONUNCIATION, from "eh-CLAY-see-uh" to "eck-lay-SEE-uh" to "ack-lou-SOY-yuh", etc.]. This whole time, there is a "portrait" of "King James" on the wall. At the end of the conversation, "King James" interrupts and gives his input. The picture comes to life, scares the crap out of the old people, it's great.

So yeah, talking picture.

Also, the room is the Jerusalem Chamber.

It is a recreation of a room in Westminster Abby, it is known as the Jerusalem Chamber [which is very anachronistic for King James, but I digress].

OKAY the point is that we all have another name for this room, and you've probably guessed it already.

"Right there! It says 'faw' where it should say 'saw'! See, I found the typo!" "Actually, sir, in that time-" "WELL THIS ISN'T THAT TIME" -older gentleman, proving to his wife that he knows the Bible better than I do

"We all know that you can't believe in God AND evolution! It's like, really! It's all right there!" -High Schooler, answering all of todays theological questions

"Here we are!! The 1611 Bible, the REAL Bible!! It's good enough for Jesus, good enough for me!"

NO.

YOU ARE WRONG.

We have a room filled with typos and errors printed in the bible. It's not enough that this room already offends people, ("THE BIBLE DOESN'T MAKE MISTAKES HOW DARE YOU") but this is the first room where we encourage people to try to read the English bibles. We are in the 1600's now, and the English language looks different now than it used to. For example, where we are used to seeing an "S", there is sometimes a different character. It resembles an "f", only the horizontal line extends behind the vertical line.

I understand that not everyone knows how the English language has changed in the last 500 years. I understand that some of this is brand new to some folks. However, the thing that surprises me is how many people assume that the mistake we want them to find is that SOME CRAAAAAZY TYPESETTER PUT AN "F" EVERY TIME THERE SHOULD HAVE BEEN AN "S"!! Also, this typesetter must have been working for HUNDREDS OF YEARS, and in MULTIPLE CITIES AND PRINTING PRESSES ACROSS THE ENGLISH SPEAKING WORLD! HOW CRAZY IS THAT???

What's even better than this? One of the larger bibles, printed around the 1730's (closer to the font and characters that we use today, save the "s") is open to a particular passage. We are trying to show that the header says "The Parable of the Vinegar" instead of "Vineyard". Unfortunately, there is a verse on the page that says,

"And woe unto them who give suck in those days."

I have never seen an actor portray Martin Luther with such an obvious sexual attraction to Desiderius Erasmus.

You know, because Erasmus writes "so...eloquently."

silence

lights

click

eyes open

CSSSSSHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH-I see GOD has ushered to Geneva/ more refugees like myself/ seeking HIS truth in a language your ear/ AAAAND HEART/ can discern!

...

-SOOOOber in temperment/ and always conduct your life/ as an example of the Godly./ Amen, and you are dismissed/ GO in peace.

Queen Elizabeth is no longer in the Paffages exhibit, save being mentioned by Anne Boleyn (aka The Martyr) while dying.

She kind of played a huge part in King James becoming the King, and therefore a huge part in the King James translation of the Bible. She also kind of played a huge part in history, period.