bunny girl

itoshi rin didn't have any friends, and it's a fact all his teachers know by now. he's a stoic student, one that doesn't participate in group projects and eats his lunch alone in the library. normally, this type of behavior exhibited by students should have been concerning to his teachers and counselors. but rin was well behaved and had straight a's in most of his classes—so, nobody took much notice of him.

he felt like a ghost, drifting through the walls of his high school without a single person by his side. it was his first day of senior year, and itoshi rin had no expectations for something good.

the phantom ache in his chest is harder to ignore nowadays. he doesn't realize he's been spacing out again until the bell rings, signaling the start of the next class period, and rin is snapped violently out of his daze. he glances at the blank canvas in front of him before realizing he's spent the past fifty five minutes doing absolutely nothing. the students around him file out of the classroom—chatting and laughing as he sits there a bit dumbfounded with how this class seemed to suck the life out of him like no other.

when rin was little, he loved drawing. his imagination would run wild, and sometimes—he couldn't always act out the magnificent battles he wanted his toys to perform. dragons and princes and volcanos—his medium of choice used to be these scratchy crayons his brother, sae, would get for rin from the corner store.

rin remembers how his parents had to force him to stop drawing just to make him eat dinner. and now, he can't even manage to put a single mark on a canvas.

during his teacher's instructions at the beginning of class, he was, quite vaguely told at that, to use whatever colors and styles he wanted to on a 12 by 12 canvas to reflect his soul. bitterly, rin thinks his canvas reflects him perfectly. he'll turn this in tomorrow, he decides. a blank canvas—no feelings, no purpose, nothing. just like him.

he'll take the shitty grade and move on with his life. rin wonders if there's even a language that exists to put his feelings into something other people can comprehend. he doesn't think there is. if he wants anyone to understand how he feels, they'll have to tear his ribs out one by one to reach the barely alive beat lying inside his chest to try and figure him out.

"do you need some help cleaning up?"

itoshi rin is seventeen years old when he falls in love.

rin glances away from his blank canvas, looking up to meet who it is speaking. the class is empty now. his art teacher is busying herself in the back of the classroom, unboxing a new pack of paintbrushes when rin swallows the lump in his throat.

"i'm fine."

your smile is hesitant. understanding, almost, as you look at rin's canvas and the tubes of unopened acrylic paint surrounding him. the window panes hanging high towards the ceiling welcome in the rising sun outside, and rin can see the light shimmering in your eyes—glittering shards of gold gleam like morning stars in your irises as you wordlessly pick up the neglected paint and brushes on his desk—carrying them over to the back of the classroom and putting them away for him as rin watches silently.

slowly, he picks up his own canvas—and he stares at his classmates' drying ones with an almost envious kind of sadness as he places his untouched canvas beside theirs. where they had explosions of colors, reds and yellows and greens and blues blending and combining into the most wonderful art—rin did not. he had nothing.

rin turns around to where he'd seen you last in the back of the classroom, before clearing his throat. he doesn't lift his gaze from the tiled floor beneath him, pressing his hand flat against the surface of a nearby table to steady himself before speaking up

"thanks..." he begins, but his voice trails off when he realizes you've already left.

—

rin was sitting in english class when he heard your voice again. to be completely honest, he had no idea you were in this course with him. rin didn't talk to anyone in all of his classes, so hearing the sound of your voice was a surprise. and where he sat in the back of the classroom, you sat towards the front. you're asking the teacher a question on last night's homework, and rin takes his chance to watch you freely.

you have a tote bag slung over your shoulder. there's a landscape painted on it, with little pins placed all over. you have your hair down today compared to the updo you wore yesterday. it's only when you turn towards your seat that rin finally makes eye contact with you.

time slows, and the conversation around him drowns to nothing as if he's ducked his head underwater. his brain is nothing but white static for that one second you look into his eyes.

truly, you didn't even hold his gaze for a full second, it was more like a fraction of one—but rin's heart rate didn't calm until the bell rang, and he was the first student out the door. he left class that day with clammy palms and pink-tinted cheeks.

today, rin didn't have art class, but he was called down regardless during study hall to meet his art teacher—an old woman with a wrinkly smile who always wore colorful cardigans. rin enters the room, moving through the empty desks and chairs before he stops in front of her with a quiet greeting.

"itoshi rin! it's so nice of you to come so quickly, students aren't usually so courteous! please, have a seat," she says warmly, and rin eyes the blank canvas—his blank canvas—laying beside her on the desk.

rin takes a seat, fading in and out of the conversation as she talks. he already knew what to expect, and of course, his assumptions were right. akamatsu sensei had the type of voice rin imagines story tellers have, or lullaby singers do. she tells him that she's having trouble seeing signs of progress in his art and wanted him to be doing better. but her last sentence is what catches rin off gaurd. this he did not predict.

"i'm failing?"

akamatsu sensei nods her head slowly, folding her hands in her lap before she begins talking about a possible tutor. she watches his delicate brows pinch together in discomfort, soft lips pulled into a small frown filled with silent frustration. rin didn't understand why he had to get another person to tutor him—he thought art was subjective.

"i promise you, rin, i have just the perfect person in mind. they're my best student—i think if anyone can get your imagination flowing again, it's them."

—

akamatsu sensei introduces you and rin to each other the following morning—and rin's learns that your name is y/n. he repeats it in his head a few times, committing it to memory before you speak his name in the sweetest voice he'll ever have the pleasure of hearing.

"itoshi-san, i think we're going to get along well! we can sit together in class and work on assignments with each other, but we'll also have to meet after school. which day are you free?" you question, and rin's heart positively plummets to his feet when you grab his hand and lead him towards his seat—you occupy the usually empty chair beside him, and he follows your lead.

"that's fine. i'm free every friday. every other day of the week i have football practice."

rin's hands grip his knees tightly under the desk when you pull your hand out of his, a fruitless attempt to try and calm himself after you so casually held his hand. your fingers curved around his perfectly. and while the gesture might not have meant anything to you, it meant so much to rin. he doesn't hold hands, he can't even hold a conversation—but you're bubbly and bright in a way that has him submitting in one second flat.

"football? that sounds like fun! i'm sorry, i'm not very well versed with sports. do you like it?" you ask, organizing the paints in front of you as rin nods wordlessly, staring at the gentle manner in which you treat the art materials. you smile at his confirmation, grabbing a tube of a radiant midnight blue and placing a dollop of it on rin's blank canvas with a grin

"when we're in doubt, it's like our minds subconsciously pull away from conflict. we shut down and sorta refuse to do anything sometimes, right? i want to push you out of your comfort zone and give you a blue canvas to work with rather than a white one. we'll see what you do with that, okay?"

rin nods, fingers moving to take the paintbrush you hand him before he turns to the awaiting paint in front of him. his brushstrokes are slow and a little messy, but five minutes later—the canvas is entirely blue.

"what do you see?" you question softly as rin stares at his canvas. he stays silent for a heartbeat, two heartbeats, and then—

"i don't see anything."

rin's inner turmoil is a storm. was he supposed to be seeing something? all he sees is blue. there's nothing coming to his mind, no connection being made—his bites the inside of his cheek, angry at himself and his clear lack of creativity.

"that's okay. let's think together, okay? what do you think of when you think of the color blue? it can be the simplest thing of all, itoshi-san. anything at all," you assure, gently scooting your chair closer to his as he nods, clenching his jaw as he thinks. blue. blue. blue. what the hell is blue?

"the sky."

you're silent a for a few moments before he hears it. it's soft and muffled with the back of your hand, but you're laughing at him. his cheeks burn in an instant, and his lips transform into a scowl immediately

"whatever, i know it's stupid—"

"no, no! i was thinking the same thing, that's why i laughed! now, the sky is a painting all in its own! think about it—it's orange and pink during sunrise, like a fruity drink on the beach. it can be a misty, pale haze during snow storms. but, i want you to think of a time you saw the sky like this—an inky void, like a dark blue veil's been put over the world. can you do that?"

rin doesn't respond. he stares at the sea of blue in front of him—blue blue blue.

"...sometimes, football practice gets cut short on rainy days. the sky sorta looks like this blue on those days. dark. blurry—but it's still...i can see some stars. and the moon peaking out from behind the clouds, too. i guess it kind of looks like that."

rin's brows furrow together in concentration as he stares at the canvas after speaking. he turns away from it and towards you after another moment—and he's met with your curious gaze. he blinks rapidly a few times to confirm the sight of your subdued awe struck expression in front of him is real, not something his imagination made up, before you break into a breathtaking smile.

"well then, let's get some black to add some darker shading to the sky! and some white—for the stars and moon...come, come..."

—

itoshi rin is attentive. it's something you would come to learn soon enough. you're an avid artist—truly, it was your passion. rin can watch you scribble away in your sketchbook from where he sits in the back of the classroom. english class is droning on, and for once, he's not paying attention.

you tilt your head over your notebook, staring at your drawing before you erase something and redraw it. rin watches the way your hair shifts and moves around you as you look at your sketchbook from different angles, perfecting your art. his lips twitch at the sight of your pout when the tip of your pencil breaks. you're restless, quickly sharpening it and continuing your drawing when the teacher's voice breaks him out of his daze.

"all right class, partner up! i'll let you chose your partners this time. please don't make me regret it," she sighs, and the excited chatter of the students quickly fills the once silent room.

rin straightens in his seat. he had absolutely no idea what the assignment was since he wasn't paying attention—but, right now, he didn't care. his eyes stayed glued on you, waiting to see who you would partner up with. rin has to crane his neck a bit as his classmates moved around and shifted seats—effectively blocking his view. once everyone settled down with their partners, rin was able to see you again.

and... you're sitting by yourself.

he doesn't know what urged him so strongly to walk towards you. he can hear his heart pounding, and if feels like there's an invisible thread tugging him closer and closer towards where you sat. he swallows the lump in his throat, standing behind you silently before he taps your shoulder

you turn around, obviously not expecting him—because your eyes widen a bit when you see rin. and rin just...stares. he doesn't say anything, and it's like the two of you were sucked into a bubble, separating you from everyone else—you both stare at each other, blinking blankly and staying absolutely silent

"do you want to—"

"are you—"

rin wants to crawl into a hole and promptly pass away. he shakes his head, pressing his lips into a firm line before speaking again. the flush of embarrassment in your cheeks was making him feel flustered.

"sorry. i was asking if you wanted to be partners with me," he speaks. rin places an awkward palm on the nape of his neck, silently questioning where he got the sudden boost of confidence to approach you from, because it had suddenly, and very inconveniently, vanished into thin air—leaving him defenseless. you smile warmly at him, quickly moving over and beckoning to the open seat beside yours.

"yes! i'd love to be partners," you say, quickly closing your sketchbook and putting it away as he nods gratefully, taking the seat beside you.

"thank you," rin says. and then, it's quiet again. the tension is as thick as butter, and you look around awkwardly before laughing, nervously.

"so...do you know what we're supposed to be doing, itoshi-san?"

this was the first time you saw rin smile. and laugh. well, not laugh, per say. but he snorts, and it's almost as if he was surprised by his own reaction as he shakes his head with a soft grin.

"not a clue."

the rest of class consisted of the two of you leaning towards each other with bowed heads, you soft giggles and rin's low voice filling the void between you two.

—

itoshi rin has a friend.

this is what friends are, he decides. people who smile at you when they see you, people who help you with your homework and work with you on projects. slowly, but surely, fall turned into winter, and winter turned into spring. friendship is a blossoming thing, he decides, because it felt like every day that passed, you and rin became closer.

your guidance is what rin needs. direction and kindness—you helped rin navigate his own mind through art, a language he could use to spill his heart's deepest secrets. every stroke of his brush came straight from the core of his soul.

charcoal was his current medium of choice this friday afternoon. every harsh fingertip pressed into rin's paper and ever gentle brush of his knuckles against the page has its own meaning—its own purpose. his tongue is poked out in concentration, and you watch rin work quietly as the quiet sound of akamatsu sensei's record player filled the silence. rin thinks of the way your delicate fingers transverse and move when you make art, and he mimics your movements—your gentle voice reassuring him.

"beautiful," you breathe breathlessly, tentative hands carefully taking the thick paper rin hands you as you stare at the art piece he'd just created. a battle field—it's set up like a football field, but instead of players, there were towering presences instead. swords and shields, a storm in the background, long blades of grass and a constellation of stars—rin's spark and love for art had been rekindled.

"thank you, y/n. i...i couldn't have done any of this without you. you're the only reason i'm not failing right now, and the only reason i even got back into art." he says softly, voice almost sheepish as your eyes flit towards his—welling with pride.

"i wish i could frame this! it's beautiful...akamatsu sensei is going to be so proud of you, itoshi-san! this talent has always been with you. i just got the wheels rolling. you're very talented, i hope you understand." you smile softly, eyes crinkling with the motion as rin's heart rate spikes at the sight

"rin," he whispers, and you blink in confusion before he clarifies himself

"call me rin, please."

"oh! okay... okay, rin," you correct yourself with a smile, the familiar flush returning to your cheeks

if rin were to move even an inch closer to you, his knee would bump against yours under the table. rin is suddenly hyper aware of the space between you two. the music playing in the back ground fades to nothing, just like the world did when rin stares at you. your eyes soften, and rin's positive his heart is going to burst right out of his chest and fall into your hands if you keep looking at him.

friends don't want to kiss their friends. the realization is chilling, and rin's eyes dart towards your lips for a split second—he couldn't stop himself, and the sight makes his breath hitch. soft, pink, plump—he wants to kiss you. rin really wants to kiss you.

the screeching sound of his chair against the floor shatters the serene moment of peace. you blink rapidly from the loud interruption as rin wordlessly picks his bag off the floor, slinging it over his shoulder in a single, fluid motion before exiting the classroom with fast, purposeful steps. you're left stunned and alone, smile fading as he leaves without saying goodbye

alone again.

—

rin is not familiar with love, you have to understand this. you must.

in his eyes—love was a transaction. a give or take scenario, and if you can't give something useful—you get your heart trampled on. a certain brother taught rin that. he leaves school that day sullen and empty, his chest physically hurting as he walked home.

rin started ignoring you after that day.

he didn't show up to your after school tutoring sessions on friday anymore (no need to now that he's passing, right?), he stopped turning towards you when your english teacher told the class to partner up—and your seat in art class beside him was now occupied by his backpack, a clear message telling you he didn't want you sitting near him.

you have to understand—rin didn't have anything to give. he'd taken your kindness, your love, your guidance—but what did he have to offer? he's not very gentle, and as graceful as his movements may be on the field, he can't always control the bite in his words. and he's oddly sensitive. his humor borderlines between dry and downright crude, and he's not used to having a friend, forget a lover—so, itoshi rin will ignore you. he will love you from afar, but he won't so much as glance in your direction anymore, because he cares too much, and rin thinks you deserve better from someone who could love you gently. he doesn't thrive like you do, he destroys. and if there were one thing in the entire world rin wished to never taint with his darkness, it would be you.

"y/n,"

you glance away from rin's retreating figure. once again, he didn't bother to look at you all day or say goodbye—he simply left class. akamatsu sensei's voice pulls you away from rin as you quickly approach her desk, bowing your head in greeting.

"sensei," you greet with a small smile as her gaze softens. she hands you a slip of paper, her voice gentle as she speaks

"rin has been leaving class far too quickly for me to catch up with! would you be a dear and give this to him for me, please? it's a permission slip he must sign for our upcoming field trip,"

the words otsuka museum of art were printed neatly at the top. you'd been looking forward to this trip for months—you vaguely remember mentioning your excitement for it to rin at some point when he still spoke to you.

the otsuka museum of art scaled five floors—three underground and two above—of the richest art history ever. there were reportedly over a thousand paintings, masterpieces ranging from ancient times to the present day from all over the world. it was your dream to have your own art in a museum like the otsuka museum one day.

"okay! that's not a problem at all, akamatsu sensei," you reply softly, bidding her goodbye as she waves enthusiastically to you. you manage a meek wave, offering a weary smile as you exit the classroom.

this was your chance to talk to rin. determined to find him before he left school for the day, you move swiftly through the crowded hallways—keeping a firm grip on your tote bag and the slip of paper between your fingertips as you push open the front doors of the school—and there he is. his strides are long and leisurely as he walks on the sidewalk about a dozen meters away from you. your feet hit the pavement as you quickly make your way towards him. he doesn't look up from his path to the school's football field, hands remaining shoved deep in his pockets and completely unaware of your approaching steps.

"rin! rin, wait up!"

rin pauses mid step, and you watch every muscle in his back tense the moment your voice reached his ears. he swallows the lump forming in his throat, closing his eyes for a moment before reluctantly turning around. his eyes are round in an almost childlike manner as you approach him.

you take a deep breath before grabbing his hand—and rin is startled for a moment before you place the field trip slip in his hand. he blinks down at it in confusion, squinting at the small text before they widen a bit in realization

"akamatsu sensei couldn't give it to you earlier, so, uh, she asked me to," you quickly say, wringing your hands together nervously as rin stays silent, blinking at the paper in his hand.

"i...i'd be really happy if you came. of course, it's not a required trip, but..."

even though rin won't look at you, resorting to burning a hole through the paper slip in his hands again, so you continue with your words.

"rin, i don't know if i did something wrong to upset you, or if i said something you didn't like—but...i'm sorry."

rin's jaw clenches, and a frown digs its way onto his face as he stares at you. he shakes his head as if to say no, and just when he opens his mouth to say something in hopes to ease you—a loud voice comes barreling towards the two of you.

"itoshi! you're late! get onto the field now!"

rin's coach's voice is booming and demanding of everyone's attention—and you're startled enough to flinch. rin exhales sharply through his nose, a vein threatening to pop on his forehead as he fights to keep himself from cursing out his coach—something he has done many times before—for startling you.

"...we'll, uh, talk another time, all right?"

he doesn't seem to want to leave until he gets your confirmation, and you quickly nod

"i...okay."

rin frowns at your hesitance, taking a half hearted step back, sparing you one last glance, before walking away. his shoulders are slumping just the slightest bit with defeat, and you don't have the strength to keep watching. you begin the walk home, thoughts scattered and heart hurt.

—

thankfully, rin did show up the day of the trip.

your breath hitched when you saw him board the bus—his dark, inky strands mused from the wind outside as he huffed, handing akamatsu sensei his field trip form before he turned towards the open seats. yes, there was one right beside you—but rin took the seat on the other side of the aisle.

doing this, he kept himself both near you and faraway—you heart sinks at the silent rejection. you spend the bus ride sketching in your notebook, trying your best to not look at rin.

—

you fell asleep on the two hour drive there. rin thinks you look a lot like a baby when you sleep. your face is composed entirely of peace. your sketchbook lays idly in your lap, and rin frowns when he notices it's slipping from your grasp.

he waits for the bus to approach a red light before slipping into the vacant spot beside you. he grabs your sketchbook, prepared to close it and put it safely away into your tote bag, when he sees what you were drawing

it was him.

—

everyone arrives to the museum after another half an hour, and after going through security, your classmates and akamatsu sensei stand in the foyer—buzzing with excitement. you leave the group the second you're given the green light. everyone is given ninety minutes to explore the museum on their own before you all have to regroup and grab lunch. you slip away as quietly as you can, moving through the crowd of people in search of some much needed solitude.

you let out a breath of relief once you escape rin's presence. now, you can't see him at all—all you can see is the hundreds of art pieces and hallways waiting to be explored. your first step is hesitant as you remember how much you wanted to explore this beautiful building with rin just a month ago, but you take it anyway.

you move through the museum slowly, allowing your body to sink into the moment and absorb the entirely new world around you. the domed ceilings themselves have art painted on them, and you twirl and waltz through the halls, taking it all in.

your heartbeat calms. your nerves, fears, sadness—it fades to nothing as you take it all in. unbeknownst to you, rin follows you the entire time.

his movements are absolutely precise. he can duck behind a nearby family or statue the moment he anticipates your gaze nearing his vicinity. he keeps a healthy distance, his eyes never leaving your form.

there's a soft smile on your face as you explore the museum. rin can't help but watch the way you excitedly chat to the security guards posted by the arts and explain each piece's history. he watches your animated gestures to the enormous structures as you explain the myths and stories behind them.

you're far too kind. truthfully, rin thinks your heart is bigger than the entire museum—bigger than the entire world. you give, and you give, and you give—but you don't ask for anything in return. you're selfless, offering your sweet smiles to passerbys and dorky art facts to anyone willing to hear.

rin would soon learn the love you offered was unconditional.

you're moving from exhibit to exhibit before you finally enter an empty one. he stands by the entrance where your back is facing him. rin is nervous beyond belief, but he takes the step inside, anyway. you don't notice him at first, too busy staring at a painting much larger than you with a feverish type of awe.

he steps beside you, not meeting your gaze as he peers up at the painting with you. a man and a woman sit at a piano, playing together in harmony. they're in a ballroom of some sort, both dressed in formal wear. rin can tell they're in love with the way they look at each other.

"i'm sorry."

rin can feel you go rigid beside him—he can hear the silent hitch in your breath as you keep your gaze glued to the painting, your fingers tensing at your sides as rin looks away from the painting, turning towards you.

he takes a moment to admire you. your lips, your lashes, the slope of your nose and the curve of your neck—before speaking

"i'm not good with my emotions. i push people away before they get to close, but it was like you slipped through the gaps—i thought i'd hurt you if i stayed. but i think hurt you more by leaving. i like you, y/n. i like you more than any person i've ever known—and i...i think i might even love you,"

the words fall from his lips in a broken whisper, and he wants to reach out and play with your fingers—have something to fidget with as he awaits your response. he wasn't going to shy away from admitting his feelings anymore, that just wasn't him. the only reason he messed up with you the first time was because he's never been in love before. but, he was willing to learn everything about it with you—he didn't want to do it with anyone else.

this moment would forever be engraved into his heart, brain, and soul—rin is sure of it, because the sight of your face when you finally look at him steals the air from his lungs.

your lip trembles slightly in disbelief for a moment before you let out a soft laugh, the sound a melody all in its own to rin's ears as you smile with all your teeth.

his mouth slots over yours a moment later. soft and so, so sweet—itoshi rin's kiss was like pressing your mouth against the petal of a flower. his hands cradle your face, his breathing coming out uneven and quick—he kisses you hard, and you laugh into his mouth as your hands wrap around his neck. he tugs you infinitely closer, molding his form against yours.

"i love you too, rin!"

Silence fills the apartment.

Sae blinks once, twice, then a third time, slower this time, just to make sure he heard correctly.

Rin Itoshi, is in love.

The realization is so absurd Sae almost laughs.

Instead, he carefully places his coffee down on the table.

"With who?"

Rin immediately looks offended.

"Don't make me say it."

Sae leans back against the couch, expression smooth and unreadable.

"Rin."

"You know who."

"I want to hear you say it."

Rin looks like he's being tortured. His fists clench at his sides while his face twists with irritation, embarrassment and something close to panic.

For a second, Sae genuinely thinks Rin might leave through the nearest window instead of answering, but then Rin mutters your name so quietly that it's nearly inaudible.

Sae tilts his head.

"Hm? Didn't catch that."

Rin's head snaps upward immediately.

"YOU HEARD ME."

"I didn't."

"You're such an asshole."

"And you're still here."

Rin glares at him at first but then, after inhaling sharply like he's preparing to dive underwater, he finally forces the words out properly.

"I love Y/N! Happy?"

Sae stares at him for a moment before a slow smirk appears on his face.

Well, this is fascinating.

"You," Sae says carefully, "are talking about a girl instead of soccer. Of course I'm interested."

Rin groans like he's physically suffering and drags both hands down his face.

"This is why I didn't want to come here."

"And yet," Sae says smoothly, "here you are."

Rin mutters something violent under his breath and as usual Sae ignores it completely.

Instead, he studies his younger brother more carefully.

Rin looks restless in a way Sae rarely sees anymore. There's too much emotion trapped beneath his skin, too much tension in his shoulders, too much vulnerability leaking through the cracks of his usual cold demeanor.

It's strange and oddly human.

"How long?" Sae asks.

Rin immediately looks exhausted by the question.

"I don't know."

"That helpless, huh?"

Rin rakes a hand through his hair harshly.

"Weeks. Months. Maybe longer. I don't fucking know anymore."

He starts pacing again, fast. Sharp turns across the living room like he has too much energy trapped inside him and nowhere to put it.

Sae watches him with mild amusement.

"Calm down."

"I can't."

"Why?"

Rin stops abruptly, spinning toward him with frustration written all over his face.

"Because she makes everything worse."

Sae blinks.

"That's your definition of love?"

"Yes. No. Shut up."

Sae nearly laughs into his coffee while on the other hand, Rin looks genuinely miserable.

"I can't think when she's around," Rin says suddenly, voice strained. "My brain just stops working."

Sae hums softly.

"She talks and I forget what I was doing. She smiles and suddenly I can't focus on anything else. She touches me and I feel like I'm dying." He drags both hands through his hair again, frustrated. "I sound insane."

"You are insane."

"I KNOW THAT."

Rin starts pacing again immediately after yelling it and the sight is so ridiculous that Sae has to bite back a grin.

Rin Itoshi, cold, composed, terrifying Rin, is currently unraveling over a girl.

Amazing.

Sae decides to make it worse for entertainment purposes.

"Does she know?"

Rin stops dead in his tracks.

"No."

"Why not?"

Rin stares at him like the answer is obvious. "Because I don't know how to tell her!"

"You're telling me just fine."

"I DIDN'T WANT TO."

"But you still came."

Rin's eye twitches. "And I'm definitely regretting it."

Sae takes another slow sip of coffee, enjoying himself immensely now.

"So what exactly do you feel for her?"

Rin stares blankly at the wall for several seconds like Sae just handed him an impossible exam question, then he groans quietly and drops onto the couch, elbows resting against his knees.

"When she laughs," he mutters, "it pisses me off."

Sae snorts immediately.

"Very romantic."

Rin glares."Not because of her. Because everyone else can hear it too."

Sae nearly chokes on his coffee.

"So you're jealous of oxygen now?"

"THAT'S NOT WHAT I SAID."

"It literally is."

Rin sinks lower into the couch, visibly regretting every life decision that led him here.

But once he starts talking, the words keep spilling out despite himself.

"When she looks at other people," he says more quietly, "I want to break something."

Sae nods thoughtfully. "Very funny."

"You're the worst person alive."

"And yet I'm still giving relationship advice."

Rin ignores that, his expression softens slightly instead, gaze lowering toward the floor.

"...When she touches me," he admits carefully, "even accidentally... my chest feels weird."

Sae raises an eyebrow.

"Like my heart stops." Rin looks deeply offended by the concept itself. "I hate it."

"No, you love it."

"For the love of god, Sae," Rin glares harder. "I'm trying to be serious."

And then something shifts slightly in Rin's expression, the frustration fades just enough for something softer to show through, something honest."She makes me want to be better."

Sae stills because that one catches him off guard. Because Rin doesn't say things like that.

Sae knows Rin's devotion has always been intense, consuming, absolute. So if someone makes him want to become better— not stronger, not more skilled in football but genuinely better— then this isn't some temporary crush.

This is real.

Sae leans back slowly, watching him more carefully now.

"Better how?"

Rin shrugs awkwardly, clearly uncomfortable.

"Everything," his voice drops quieter. "As a player. As a person. As a man."

There's a sincerity in his tone that almost feels foreign coming from him.

Sae's teasing expression softens slightly.

"Have you told her any of this?"

Rin immediately looks offended again.

"How the hell do I tell her that every time she ties her hair back I forget my entire identity?"

Sae lets out a short laugh.

"Poetically?"

"Do I look like a poet?"

"No," Sae says honestly. "You look like a disaster."

Rin flips him off instantly and Sae just smiles into his coffee.

For a while, silence settles between them.

Rin looks unusually uncertain sitting there, shoulders tense, gaze distant. Sae realizes then that beneath all the irritation and dramatics, Rin is genuinely scared.

Sae exhales softly before leaning forward slightly.

"Rin."

Rin glances up.

"If you love her," Sae says calmly, "then tell her."

Rin's throat bobs, and for a moment, he says nothing.

Then, quietly, "I'm scared."

Sae blinks once, because that might be the most honest thing Rin has said since coming here. "Of what?"

Rin looks away immediately.

"...That she won’t choose me."

The words come out rough and small, like they physically hurt to admit.

Sae watches him for a long moment, then he sighs softly.

"She will."

Rin looks up sharply.

"How the hell do you know that?"

Sae almost rolls his eyes.

Because honestly? Rin can read a soccer field in seconds but remains catastrophically stupid about emotions.

"If she's still with you after knowing all your flaws," Sae says simply.

Rin goes still.

"She genuinely loves you, half baked idiot."

Rin's breath catches slightly.

Sae notices the exact moment hope appears on his face— small, hesitant, almost disbelieving.

"...What?"

Sae shrugs and Rin's entire face turns red instantly. His ears become violently pink, and he immediately looks away like he's been shot.

Sae smirks.

Adorable.

"You're welcome," he says, standing up and grabbing his empty cup. "Now leave. I have training."

Rin stands too, muttering curses under his breath while heading toward the door. "You're an asshole."

"And you're a half baked idiot who's hopelessly in love."

Rin groans in agony.

Then, just as he reaches the door, he pauses.

Sae glances up.

Rin doesn't turn around when he speaks again.

"...Thanks, nii-chan."

Sae freezes completely. And by the time Sae processes the words, Rin is already gone— fleeing down the hallway with red ears and obvious embarrassment before Sae can react.

The front door clicks shut behind him.

Sae stares at it for several seconds.

Then he exhales quietly, shaking his head with a faint, helpless smile.

"That idiot," he murmurs softly while looking down at the abandoned coffee cup on the table and laughs under his breath.

•Rinne loves to bake with you! Whether it's baking cookies or cupcakes, he loves to spend quality time with you, bonus points for indulging in a little sweet treat!Baking with Rinne can (and will) get messy, don't be surprised if you get flour all over your face and your clothes! Rinne loves to help you tidy up too, he'll even wash the flour off your face with that playful grin you love so much.

•Rinne always seeks out your advice and comfort! You'll always be the person he goes to. Whether he's venting over a stressful live rehearsal, or he's just lost a lot of money in the casino, or even if he's talking to you about the upcoming CrazyB choreography, you're the first person he wants to tell! Even if you don't know what to say to comfort him, just running your hand through his hair and nodding along as he speaks gives him a lot of comfort.

•Rinne prefers being the big spoon, but he's happy to be the little spoon. Rinne likes to hold you against his chest, pressing his nose against your hair while breathing in the familiar shampoo scent. He likes to trace idle patterns on your skin while drifting off to sleep. However, if you're the big spoon, Rinne loves to feel your arms wrap around him. He feels safe and warm, ready to sleep wake up feeling refreshed. Rinne loves when you kiss his forehead, he enjoys drifting off to sleep while you press kisses to his forehead or the top of his head. You can physically feel his tense body relax as the two of you start to cuddle, once he's relaxed, he becomes uncharacteristically clingy towards you while struggling to keep his eyes open.

It was official, finally. Maybe too quickly you had forgiven Rin and let him back into your life far easier than either of you had expected. But who could really blame you? Not when someone like him, someone who never admitted fault, who would rather choke on his pride than say he was wrong, stood in front of you and apologized like that. Not when he looked at you with those quiet, stubborn eyes that softened just enough to show you everything he refused to say out loud. Not when, for once, he chose you without hesitation. The only correct answer was that no one could have resisted.

If Rin had known it would’ve been this simple to have you take him back, he might’ve shown up properly, with flowers in hand and something sweet to bribe you with. You always did have a sweet tooth, Rin was sure that if he did do that you might just take the chocolates from his hands and slam the door in his face, or maybe you’d actually kiss him right then and there? Women confused him greatly. But even then, he knew that earning your forgiveness wasn’t exactly that simple.

Your forgiveness wasn’t something light, not something he could take for granted just because you gave it to him and only him so easily. If anything, it made him more careful. Because if you could open the door for him just like that, then you could just as easily close it again. And that thought alone was enough to keep him grounded and cautious. He lost you once because of his own fault, he wasn’t willing to repeat the same mistake twice.

You and Rin were in your car, cutting through the lanes of the Tomei Expressway at speeds well beyond what was considered legal. The engine hummed beneath you, steady but powerful, the kind of sound that settled into your bones the longer you drove. Cars blurred past in your peripheral vision as you overtook them one after another, your movements sharp and instinctive, like the road itself was something you understood better than anything else.

Rin sat beside you this time, properly strapped in with the six-point harness you had installed. He wasn’t making the mistake of underestimating your driving again. Not after last night. Not after seeing what you could really do when you stopped holding back. And yet, despite how fast you were going, despite the way the car shifted and responded under your control, he didn’t feel uneasy.

If anything, he felt… Strangely at ease. Maybe it was the aftermath of everything that had happened earlier, the lingering warmth of the kiss you shared, or maybe it was just you. The way you moved, the way you handled everything with quiet confidence, it made it hard for him to doubt you, even when logic told him he probably should.

And that only made things worse. Because the more comfortable he felt, the harder it was to ignore everything else running through his head. Rin’s thoughts weren’t exactly… As organized as he hoped they would’ve been. But then again, they never really were when they came to you. You had this sort of effect on him, you were kind of an enigma to him, that when he didn’t have you close he became more irritable but at the same time if he had you close, it was like his brain would lag or turn off. Things he never would’ve done normally, were thrown out of the window when you smiled at him.

His mind really was a mess, one second he was thinking about how easily you forgave him, how he didn’t deserve how quickly you let him back in, and the next he was thinking about pulling you into another deep kiss now that it was just the two of you alone in the car. The thoughts overlapped, contradicted each other, tangled in ways that didn’t make sense even to him.

He hated that. He hated how easily you got into his head again, how quickly everything he built over the past two years started to unravel just from being around you like this. Two years of focusing on nothing but soccer, of pushing everything else aside, of convincing himself that this was the only thing that mattered, and now he was here, distracted over something as simple as the way your hands moved on the wheel. How you looked so focused staring straight ahead at the road.

He couldn’t bring himself to look away, not when you looked that criminally pretty. And maybe, one could say it was his raging hormones talking, after all he still was just a young 18 year old boy. And he’d been isolated from you by his own choice and so now he was suffering the consequences of it. Now, he really really wanted to pull you in a heavy make out session, the kiss from earlier did barely anything to satisfy the hunger inside of him. His gaze stayed on you longer than it should have, lingering in a way that made it harder to focus on anything else.

Speaking of earlier, while the two of you were busy making up (More like eating each other's faces sweetly), Takeshi had taken your car out to get the tires replaced and the tank filled. In moments like that, being the younger sibling had its advantages. You didn’t even have to ask, he just did it, grumbling the entire time but still getting it done anyway. Because what else were big brothers for except being a walking ATM machine for their little siblings? Even Sae used to do that for Rin when you were younger.

Sneaking Rin out earlier was another story that was completely ridiculous without it having the right to be. What you thought looked smooth and coordinated probably came off as two sleep-deprived idiots trying to act like spies in some low-budget movie. You had shoved him behind walls, dragged him through blind spots, and pulled him along by the sleeve like your life depended on it. And somehow, he went along with all of it without complaining too much.

When your dad passed by the living room and you pushed Rin flat against the wall without much warning, he didn’t even resist. He just stayed there, silent, still, letting you take control of the situation like it was the most natural thing in the world. Even if your parents were used to him being around, the sight of both of you sneaking out of your room, looking disheveled and half-awake, would’ve raised more questions than either of you wanted to deal with.

Sneaking around behind your parents back was a different kind of adrenaline rush from soccer, honestly he thought his heart was going to jump out of his chest from how hard it was beating, meanwhile you were there acting out like a James Bond movie. Both of you pretending not to notice how you almost tripped when you saw your mom making more food since Takeshi finished all your bacon. Screw Takeshi honestly, what a big back. The moment you both got out of the back door, you immediately started laughing which didn’t amuse Rin’s nonchalant personality that much.

Still, going back, Rin needed to find a way to sneak back into his room which at least wasn’t as hard as your house. His mom and dad probably didn’t notice him gone and Sae wasn’t even there as a set of extra surveillance eyes. He could probably walk right in pretending he came from a jog and his parents wouldn’t question it, had it not been for the fact that he wasn't even sweaty and that his cheeks and ears were very red. And Rin wasn’t the type of person to blush easily.

As just before the two of you split to head back to your respective houses, he reached out and pressed a soft kiss against your forehead. It wasn’t planned, it wasn’t something he thought through, but it did feel right in the moment. He just let his instincts take over his body. The way you stilled for a second, caught off guard by the gentleness of it, stayed with him longer than he expected.

This was the boy you knew back then. This was Rin Itoshi back in high school. The one who notices the small changes in your moods and adjusts accordingly. The one who skipped school to take care of you because you were sick and your entire family had gone to see your dad’s race competition in China. The one who gave you his jacket to cover yourself up with because your period blood stained your pants. The one who stood by you in your highest and lowest points in life without making it seem like a burden. This was your Rin.

And being around him like this again felt like breathing after being underwater for too long. Like something in you that had been deprived for years was finally getting what it needed again. It was warm, overwhelming in a way that didn’t suffocate you, but instead filled the empty space you had gotten used to ignoring. It felt right. But even then, you knew better than to pretend everything was magically fixed.

Two years didn’t just disappear because of one night. The things you both went through, the distance, the silence, the hurt you carried separately, all of that was still there, lingering beneath the surface. Some parts of it might never fully heal, and maybe that was something you’d have to learn to live with. But right now, that didn’t matter as much, you could figure that out together later, you still had 3 weeks left together before you’d need to part again. And both of you were going to savor it as long as possible.

What you had in this moment was real. It wasn’t perfect, it wasn’t clean, but it was yours. And for the first time in a long time, it felt like something you could hold onto without it slipping through your fingers. You were glad Takeshi decided to sit out with you guys because he had a last minute date with the girl he met from last night at the race, the one time you thanked the heavens for Takeshi being such a player.

“Yeah, it was a tough one! I had to-”

“Has Takeshi always been this way with you?” Rin questioned, cutting you off from the story of you racing

“Not really, you remember we weren’t that close before? He was always so distant… Now he just randomly goes into my room to annoy me, steals my food, puts me in a chokehold or even tries to air punch my face. It's like he’s making up for all the years he wasn’t there. Honestly, sometimes I question who's the real teen here.” You laughed, but Rin was glad you got closer to your brother he could still remember the days you resent Takeshi because he never gave you any attention

So now it really was just you and Rin alone in the car. And though Rin wasn’t big on talking much he was clearly enjoying the ride and the sight of you. Meanwhile, you kept updating him about the things that went on in your life after he left. And he listened intently, sometimes noticing how he stared at your eyes and lips too long which you had to hold back on giggling. He also did occasionally add his own insights to the conversation, telling you his experiences at Blue Lock and the things he’s learnt there but there wasn’t much going on for him except for rivalries and soccer.

It made him realize just how much he missed because of leaving and though he can’t really say that he regrets it because one thing is for sure, he doesn’t regret Blue Lock. That was what made him who he is today, it’s what’s helping him to achieve his dream of becoming the world’s greatest striker.

But guess you could say he was afraid of missing out, if he leaves again who knows how long it’ll be until he can come back and see you again? And would you still be there even? You chasing after your dream of racing means that you’d be busier than him for sure. Always traveling to new circuits and competing.

He was scared of you realizing that maybe being tied down to him isn’t what you really wanted. That maybe you’d want someone more suited to your lifestyle, someone like a racer or someone who could accommodate you and accompany you to your races. He could try the best he could, but the details were such a blur.

While Rin was having an inner crisis, you were having the time of your life. Driving and speeding across cars, feeling the engine roar beneath you while having Rin finally back in your life, it felt good. Actually no, it felt more than good, it felt great. You may have never really believed in soulmates. It always sounded too ideal, too unrealistic to apply to real life. But with Rin, it was hard not to think about it. Hard not to wonder if maybe, somehow, he was the one person who was meant to stay in your life no matter how far you drifted apart.

The one who understood you without needing everything explained. The one who made everything feel… Complete. So now, as the road stretched endlessly in front of you, the hum of the engine steady beneath your feet and the world blurring past at full speed, you tightened your grip on the wheel just slightly, your eyes focused but your thoughts elsewhere. Because for once, you weren’t just chasing something ahead of you. You had already found it. And this time, you weren’t going to let it slip away again.

With one hand on the wheel, the other searched for Rin’s “… I’ve waited so long for you to come back to me. Don’t go somewhere I can’t follow.” Your words helped to settle his mind without even knowing he needed it

“I promise, I won’t. You have my word.” Rin responded and he tensed up as you held each other, until soon relaxing into it, “I’ll always come back to you, it won’t be like before.”

The rest of the drive felt shorter than it should’ve been, but Rin was enjoying his time being a passenger princess. The saying was right, time flies when you're having fun. You soon reached the Fuji Speedway, and it was the most beautiful track you ever had the pleasure of driving on. You remembered it well, that certain summer around four years ago when you had a track competition here, and you had won.

It wasn’t just the victory that stayed with you, it was everything else that came with it. The heat of the asphalt beneath your tires, the way the engine roared through the long straight, the feeling of pushing the car just enough to dance on the edge without losing control.

The circuit stood on the foothills of Mount Fuji, the towering presence of the mountain stretching high above the track, calm and unmoving against the sky. The weather had shifted, cooler than what you were used to in Kamakura, the air thinner and sharper as it brushed against your skin. It wasn’t harsh, but it was enough to make you notice, enough to remind you that you weren’t home anymore and that this was real. You were taking your first real big step into going pro. Something you had almost given up on focused entirely on street racing.

But while you were enjoying everything else, the boy besides you tensed up from the cold. Rin noticed it immediately, how the biting cold pinched his skin slightly in ways he didn't like. He shifted slightly in his seat, the faintest hint of annoyance crossing his expression but just as quickly as it appeared, it vanished. He never liked colder seasons, that much was established.

He never liked how the air bit at his skin or how it made everything feel slower, heavier. He preferred warmth, where his body moved freely without resistance, where nothing held him back. But at the same time, he wasn’t going to ruin this for you because ironically, Rin knew your favorite season was winter.

And not only that, he couldn’t deny how incredible the view was. The mountain overlooking the circuit was breathtaking, vast in a way that made everything around it feel smaller. It wasn’t loud or overwhelming, but it commanded attention without trying, just by being there. The kind of sight that made you pause without realizing it, that made you take it in even if you didn’t mean to.

Rin had seen it before once, the last time he went here was the field trip you both had in your elementary days. Those were years ago, back when things were simpler, back when the biggest concern he had was whether he could beat Sae in a one-on-one. He remembered it clearly, the way you tugged on his sleeve, already dragging him somewhere he didn’t plan on going. The way your eyes lit up the moment you spotted a convenience store, like that was the most important thing in the world at that moment. You had insisted on getting something warm to eat, completely ignoring the schedule, ignoring the teacher’s instructions, ignoring everything except what you wanted.

And of course, like the lovestruck fool he was, he followed behind you. You dragged him inside, scanning the shelves like you were on a mission, grabbing an onigiri without hesitation. Only for you to pause mid-action, patting your pockets like you hadn’t already forgotten something important and you did, your wallet which was still on the bus.

Rin could still remember the way you looked at him after with puppy eyes, like it was already his responsibility to fix it. And he did, he always did. He paid without complaint, even though he knew exactly how this would end. You both got scolded the moment you got back, standing there side by side while the teacher lectured you about responsibility, about following rules, about not wandering off on your own.

You took most of the blame, of course, but that didn’t stop you from nudging him afterward, whispering about how worth it it was while sharing half of your snack with him. And somehow, he couldn't find it in himself to disagree with you, maybe because he was just so happy to see the lights in your eyes shine as bright as they did. Or maybe, he could never say no when it came to you.

But just as quickly as that memory resurfaced, once Rin blinked, the memory faded rapidly, replaced by the present. The track in front of him wasn’t just some place from the past anymore. It was where you stood now. Where you belonged because if he belonged on a field full of freshly cut grass, you belonged in rubberized asphalt full with smoke and oil.

Rin glanced at you, your hands steady were still on the wheel, eyes focused but alive in a way he hadn’t seen in a long time and even more than what he had witnessed last night, he understood that this wasn’t just another stop, this was your stepping stone. This was your world. The world where no one could hold you back the moment you stepped onto that circuit. So he couldn't find help but wanted to support you in any way he could, thoughts and fear of you going too far ahead of him where he couldn’t chase after faded into the back of his mind.

If he wanted you, if he really did love you, and he did. He'd let you go and live your own life. Because as much as he was insecure of himself secretly, he wouldn't dare to place those heavy emotional baggage on your shoulders. He didn't want to tie you down or lock you up in some golden cage like a prized bird. He didn’t want to harm you more than he had already for ghosting you.

Rin knew you valued your freedom more than anything, that was just the kind of person you were. An adrenaline fucking junkie, just his luck. He could only hope that maybe he could still keep you grounded as driving at speeds well over 300 km/h was a dangerous and deadly sport. And though he never doubted your skills, he just prays that you'll always be safe. He really doesn’t want to be going to any hospitals or God forbid, a funeral anytime soon.

As you both got out of the car with Rin carrying your surprisingly heavy backpack. The man in the suit from last night was already waiting by the paddock, looking ever so sharp and professional. Even in daylight, with everything calmer and more structured than the chaos of the parking deck, he stood out immediately. He approached the moment you stepped out, his gaze settling on you first before flicking briefly to Rin.

“Right on time.” The man spoke and then, without rushing, he reached into his coat and held out a card between his fingers, “I wasn’t able to properly introduce myself last night, I’m Hayashi Kento. Head of Talent Acquisition for Apex Racing Development.”

“Thanks for giving me a test run.” You shook the hand that he offered

“If you follow me, I'll show your team. Your coach is Kurogane Renji, by the way. He was the one who personally reviewed your profile and requested that we bring you here before making a final decision.”

That immediately caught your attention, “Personally?”

Hayashi nodded once as the three of you walked deeper into the garage area. “Your academy records were already impressive enough to warrant attention, but it was the combination of your formal training and your street racing history that made him interested. Most drivers only understand one environment properly. You’ve experienced both and though it’s not uncommon for some drivers to be well versed in both styles, your skills are noteworthy enough.”

The deeper you walked into the paddock, the quieter everything seemed to get. Less spectators, less noise, more focus. Mechanics moved around with practiced efficiency while engines occasionally roared somewhere deeper within the circuit. Everything here felt expensive, calculated, controlled. Rin felt out of place but he wasn’t going to leave you, to Hell to that. He was going to watch you like a hawk if need be, or else the fear of losing you would gnaw at his heart until he couldn’t stand it anymore.

“We reviewed your telemetry, previous race footage, corner entry speeds, throttle control, braking patterns, recovery timing after oversteer, and how quickly you downshift under pressure.” Hayashi continued calmly. “Your habits are inconsistent at times, but your adaptability is unusually high. Kurogane-san wanted to see whether that translates well across different motorsport disciplines as we’ve seen you trying them out as well.”

“Different disciplines?” Rin repeated from beside you feeling a bit more nervous now, he was beginning to question who was more nervous, you or him despite him not even going to be the one test driving

“Apex isn’t strictly a Formula program.” Hayashi explained. “Formula racing is only one part of it. We train for endurance racing, rally, touring cars, NASCAR, motorcycle racing, and anything else that demands competitive adaptability. The purpose of Apex is simple.” His expression stayed calm, but there was something colder beneath it now, something more ambitious, “We intend to dominate the world’s motorsports entirely.” That made Rin raise a brow slightly while you stayed quiet and listened.

The seriousness in his tone made it clear that this wasn’t some fun little track day. This was an evaluation in every sense of the word. One mistake wouldn’t just bruise your ego and pride, it could completely ruin your chances of getting into Apex altogether. And you just hoped all those years of going to different academies had prepared you enough for this.

“First, you’ll start off in an F2,” Hayashi continued calmly. “Kurogane wants to see how well your fundamentals hold up once you’re put into something far more sensitive than what you’re used to. Formula cars punish hesitation immediately, especially at higher speeds.”

You listened carefully while Rin walked beside you in silence, though from the corner of your eye you could tell he was paying attention to every word too, “After that, we’ll move you into a drift-spec GT platform.” Hayashi glanced briefly toward another garage further down the paddock where several tuned cars sat lined up under fluorescent lighting. “That portion focuses less on discipline and more on recovery, throttle control, oversteer management, and how well you maintain composure once the car becomes unstable.”

That honestly sounded more up your alley. Street racing and mountain passes had practically forced you to learn how to recover from mistakes quickly or else you’d end up wrapped around a guardrail somewhere. You could already feel your body reacting more positively to the thought of a looser, more aggressive car compared to the sharp precision demanded by Formula racing.

“And finally…” Hayashi continued, “The motorcycle division, we’re aware that you’re somewhat familiar with handling one.” That caught both you and Rin off guard slightly.

“You ride bikes too?” Rin immediately looked at you with suspicion.

“… Sometimes.” You avoided eye contact with him and Rin looked genuinely betrayed.

Hayashi ignored the interaction entirely, “The superbike evaluation is usually reserved for later stages of training,” he explained. “But Kurogane specifically requested it after reviewing your adaptability scores.”

Now that was concerning, “Motorcycles remove a lot of the safety net that cars provide.” Hayashi continued, his tone remaining level and professional. “There’s no cockpit around you, no seat harness keeping you grounded, no frame separating your body from the asphalt. At those speeds, panic becomes obvious almost immediately.” The atmosphere felt heavier the more he spoke, “The purpose of this evaluation isn’t simply to see if you’re fast.” Hayashi added. “Plenty of people are fast. Apex exists to determine whether a driver can dominate across multiple forms of asphalt motorsport without falling apart mentally or physically the moment conditions change.”

Then Hayashi went on another information rant and the atmosphere grew heavier, the more he explained things. Not intimidating exactly, but serious in a way that made it impossible to treat this casually.

Well maybe you should’ve done a bit more research about Apex before deciding to show up blindly today, maybe then you would’ve been more serious and prepared than you are at this moment. And you would’ve definitely brought Takeshi with you as support. But that’s fine, you’ll have to just trust your skills, knowledge, and experiences that you’ve collected over the years as being a racer.

“And before you misunderstand.” Hayashi added, finally glancing at you directly again, “This test drive is a privilege.”

You frowned slightly at that, “Apex is currently an all-male academy.” He continued matter-of-factly, which made Rin cringe, “Not because women aren’t allowed to race, but because no female applicant so far has met Kurogane’s standards.” That honestly sounded less insulting and more threatening somehow, “The standard F2 evaluation wasn’t originally meant for applicants.” Hayashi admitted sheepishly, “Especially not this early.”

“Then why am I getting it?” You asked confused as to why this was happening then

“Oh simple, that’s because Kurogane insisted, he’s a bit biased. He reviewed your data personally last night after I forwarded your profile. And after seeing your records, he decided he wanted to evaluate you immediately before deciding whether you’re worth bringing into the program.”

There was no sugarcoating in the way he said it. This wasn’t an acceptance. This was an inspection, “You being a girl makes this situation unusual, but whether you stay or leave will still depend entirely on your results. Nobody here is going to lower expectations for you.”

“Good.” You replied almost instantly. “I’d be more offended if they did.” That finally earned the faintest hint of approval from Hayashi before he stopped in front of one of the quieter garages.

“Let’s begin,” Hayashi said as the three of you finally stopped in front of the garage, “You’ll find that we’ve already prepared a racing suit for you, so you won’t be needing the one you brought.” He gestured lightly toward the bag Rin was carrying over his shoulder.

Rin clicked his tongue quietly. “Good thing I carried this heavy thing all the way here then.”

“You volunteered,” You countered immediately with a smile

“I was manipulated.”

“You’re dramatic.”

Hayashi ignored the two of you entirely, already pushing open the garage doors. The moment you stepped inside, the colder air conditioning hit your skin alongside the scent of rubber, gasoline, heated brakes, and machine oil. The entire place looked spotless despite the activity happening around it. Engineers moved between monitors while mechanics worked around the cars with quick and practiced precision, conversations remaining low and professional underneath the occasional roar of engines from outside.

“You can stand by and observe in the viewing area.” Hayashi said toward Rin, motioning toward the elevated glass section overlooking the garages and part of the circuit. “As long as you don’t distract anyone.”

Rin frowned slightly. “You say that like I’m a child.”

“You act like one occasionally.” That made you snort quietly while Rin looked deeply offended for the second time that morning.

Hayashi then turned back toward you and handed over a folded black racing suit neatly packed inside a protective garment bag. Unlike the colorful designs you were used to seeing in Formula racing, this one was almost entirely matte black with minimal silver detailing along the shoulders and sleeves. The Apex emblem rested subtly against the chest area, sleek and sharp without being flashy. Even the suit itself felt expensive.

“Get changed first. Then you’ll meet your team for a final tune up if you have any request then we’ll officially begin.” Hayashi instructed calmly. “Kurogane is already reviewing the track conditions and telemetry setup for your evaluation.”

Right. The evaluation. The reality of everything settled heavier in your chest now that you were finally here. Last night still felt surreal in your head, almost impulsive in a way. Street racing under neon lights, getting approached out of nowhere, and suddenly being invited into some elite motorsport program that practically sounded like the racing version of Blue Lock.

And now you were standing inside their garage at Fuji Speedway preparing to drive a Formula 2 car. What the hell was your life? You took the suit from Hayashi carefully, fingers brushing against the material before glancing toward the changing rooms nearby.

“I’ll be back.” you said before heading off.

The moment you disappeared around the corner, Rin let out a quiet breath and adjusted the bag on his shoulder. The atmosphere inside the garage was different from what he expected. It wasn’t chaotic or flashy like underground street races. Everything here moved with frightening precision, every mechanic and engineer knowing exactly what they were doing without wasting unnecessary movement or words.

It reminded him a little too much of Blue Lock. Though they were entirely different sports, the same pressure was there. And somehow that realization made Rin dislike this place a little more than he already did. He didn’t like the smell of oil and burnt rubber exactly, or the sound of cars but he’d stay for you. He was just internally praying for your safety, this time you’d be racing more dangerously than last night and despite Rin’s fears he swallowed them and mentally prepared. He couldn’t deny, he was a bit excited to see you race.

A/n: Sorry this was so late! I’ve been very sickly and I’ve failed one of my classes and it stressed me out so much that I almost passed out and they had to wheelchair me to the schools clinic.