sometimes
sometimes people aren’t there for us the way we are for them. and it stings. to be left behind and forgotten. maybe that’s not intentional, but that’s how it feels. i always get left behind cause im a low maintenance person. i value relationships so much, i didn’t have much relatability/stability growing up. when i find amazing connections with genuine people it’s hard for me to not put it all out there. even if years go by, i talk about them like we hung out yesterday. for me it feels like no time has passed. but i see time passing and i’m not being brought along for the ride. it’s heartbreaking. cause i will reach out and then i’m cast aside if i don’t bug. but you don’t want to be apart of someone’s life if they don’t want you anymore right? they get into new relationships, new paths and the old ones don’t get the same attention anymore. so what do you do? i guess you just move on. but it’s so hard cause you don’t want to lose another person. i’ve already lost so many. i feel so alone trying to keep these connections, but it’s not reciprocated. so what do you do then? do i just give up? it’s hard cause i’m scared if i do, then the relationship will not exist anymore. it’s like i’m the one keeping it alive….and i’m tired of carrying all the weight. but i want everyone to be happy. and it just feels like i’m the burden.
