my diary

i didnt know ppl actually listened to gracie abrams i thought that was a joke

watching videos abt games i like and listening to anthony green and eating cake and drinking a dirty baja and doing my favorite stim and in comfort clothes and petting an otter stuffed animal and looking at pictures of anthony green and talking to friends ALL AT ONCE to minimize the chance of a thought occurring

WHO WANT ME

i cant tell if im handling this well or not. i mean my chest has hurt and ive been on the verge of tears for the past 24 hours but like other than that im kinda zen

sad that im not a normal person again but its ok bc im GOING to have a good week starting this sat IM NOT LETTING IT BE BAD

frerardie on twitter when they see a joke: ermm this is weird right?

my controversial opinion is i dont like stage diving as a concept at all

id be 100x stronger if i didnt live in a state of being constantly overstimulated

sometimes i think im faking the bpd thing and then i remember how intensely painful the entire year of 2024 was to the point my entire life is different now because of how negatively it made me act

i genuinely feel so incredibly terrible and i cant even relax or do anything and i cant even cry i think im gonna start harming myself and no ones online not like id have energy to talk to anyone anyway

feeling absolutely entirely terrible and miserable does anyone want to come over and hang out or should i kill myself or something