Here are some more stories that were sent to me:
After several years, I realized that my mother used to sexually abuse me. It had happened a few times that we would explore each others' bodies. She would touch me down there, now I know she was masturbating me. Of course that at that age I would never get to an orgasm or anything like it. It felt like it was a game. One night, I remember being on the living room watching tv. She was using her robe, and was hugging me. The "game" started again, and I ended up with my minuscule dick inside her. It was the strangest feeling I can remember: excitement, some kind of guilt of being doing something wrong (this was probably because my step father used to hit me, as he didn't like me being close to my mother. If he'd found me watching tv or doing nothing on their bedroom, he would look angry and me - when my mother was not looking - and then hit me when we got alone in the house), and the weird feeling of "peeing" inside her.
It took me years to face her and ask her about that night. I kind of didnât know if it was real and wouldn't even want to remember it. But one day I just asked. She broke in tears, asked for forgiveness and explained to me that it was a mistake, that she had been abused by his father and brother, and in a way, that it was "normal" to her.
I'm still trying to find out how all of this affected me.
I was boozing hard, ended up taking some Xanax and passing out in my own bed. Woke up to this girl who I knew wanted me even though I have a serious girlfriend (she was in my house because she is friends with my roommates) on top of me, naked and riding me. I came to, pushed her off and said what the fuck?! She started crying, saying that she just wanted to be with me, and that she thought if I woke up to her fucking my passed out body I would want to keep going. Fucked up, but flip the situation around and I would be in prison right now.
I've never told anyone this.
When I was 7 or 8 some neighborhood girls who were probably two years older would take me to one of the the girls garage had me drop my pants and teased me to an erection. They thought it was hilarious I was pretty humiliated. A couple times my younger sister was with us. They had me put my penis in her mouth or do things to her like touch her and put my mouth down there.
My older sisters friend would take me in the forest and show me things and give me blow jobs and things like that... I was in the second-third grade. I had I no idea it was wrong which was awful. The mind is not geared to be sexually active at the young of an age and it has actually caused me quite a few problems psychologically when it come to sex and relationships.
A third grader should not be giggling whenever he hears the word "blow"... The worst part is that I repressed the memory for so long that it caused a lot of issues for me in the long run, including not realizing that there must have been something going on in her home life that was abusive.. The thought of it now makes me feel selfish and horrible knowing I could have said something (she was in 5th-6th grade, also far too young, there had to be foul play).
When I was 12 my 16 year old step sister and her friends held me down. It started as tickling but then turned and they undressed me. I couldn't break free and they got everything off of me. They kept me held down and commenting on what they saw. Eventually I was able to break free. When my mom and step dad came home they both blew it off as nothing (this was early 1980s - different time). I eventually made a big enough stink that she sent her friends home and grounded her for the weekend. That was it.
When I was a kid maybe 10? My cousin [M] wanted to play a game of truth or dare with me and my brother. When the first dare came up he dared someone to put their penis in his mouth (or something like that I repressed most of this memory). My brother's dick ended up in his mouth. For probably a decade that this event went completely unreported. My father confronted me when he heard from my uncle that this had happened. The chain went like this:
My brother was molested by my cousin.
My cousin was molested by his brother.
That cousin was molested by a scout leader.
That behavior was simply passed on. One act ended up messing up way more than just the original victim. Children don't fully comprehend what is happening and often think it is normal behavior that is acceptable to repeat. It is crucial to recognize that if a child is doing something like this it is likely that there was an adult molesting a child at some point.
A man very close to me, when he was about the same age, in first grade, he went to this sitter who would play a version of Simon says where she would do things to the kids and have the children perform acts on each other. I think some of the worst part of the abuse was the confusion of feeling violated and also guilt at having been forced to do things to others. In most sexual assault there is the confusion and guilt of participation (from my experience anyways...I was raped when I was 20) even if participation was the simple survival response of stopping fighting, but I think for men and boys this is exaggerated because there is the presumption that erections can only happen when a man wants them to. It has taken decades for this man to blame the pedophile who did this to them instead of himself. Some of those kids never recovered. If I knew her name I'd like to publicly humiliate her, and maybe terrorize her for years so she can know some form of the torment she perpetrated on those kids.
When I was 21 I went out drinking with some friends. I blacked out. I wasn't just drunk, I was unconscious. I dreamed that night that I was having sex with my girlfriend. I never had a wet dream before so when I did it woke me up. It was about 4AM and a woman I didn't know was on me.
I freaked out and asked her to leave.
I felt like I had cheated on my girlfriend and was terrified I caught something. I had nightmares about finding out years later that this woman somehow found me and had a kid and sued me for child support or something.
I still get panic attacks about it sometimes.
in high school, had this girl that every time she passed me in the hall would grope my crotch.
Freshman in college we went out as group and I got really drunk. I had a friend that has a bf and if I didn't bring a girl back she would come over and cuddle. Well that night I passed out and didn't remember much from that night. The following day we were all at lunch talking about something and sex came up. Someone asked which one of us has hooked up, out of the group. The girl I was friend with said that we did. I was confused and said no we didn't. She said that when i passed out I was hard so I guess she took that as an invitation to have sex with me. I ask her what she thought I was doing with my eyes closed not responding to anything. So you can technically say she raped me. She felt bad. I guess the big difference is that I didn't really mind that it happened. I was single and I knew this girl well enough that I wasn't worried about STD's.
My friend had met a really nice girl online, A, who had a single friend, B, so we went on sort of a group date. It was cool, the friend was nice enough, but I wasn't interested. She kept blowing up my phone, and I tried my best to let her down easy.
Weeks later I'm out with some friends at a bar and A and B show up. I ignored B the entire night and talked to a female friend of mine the whole night while drinking heavily.
The band had finished playing, the night was winding down, and more importantly, the girl I had been talking to all night had left. An intoxicated B slid into the stool next to mine and started talking to me. Whatever, we start chatting and she just grabs my crotch. I pushed her hand away and tried to angle myself away from her, but she just reached over and grabbed for it again. I didn't know what to do. I couldn't make a scene because everyone would naturally assume it was ME doing something wrong. I got up and moved away. She followed.
I found my sister. Perfect. I introduce B to my sister thinking I just stopped the problem. Nope. Right in front of my sister, She reaches over and grabs my crotch again. I must have looked panicked, because in my drunken stupor, I watched my sister immediately transform into this hot firey demon of rage. She just starts screaming at this girl to get her hands off of me. The bar staff eventually intervened, and kicked the girl out of the bar.
The shitty thing of it was, they apologized up and down to my sister, but never to me. Either way, I was relieved to be out of that situation and extremely thankful my sister was there. Looking back on it, the feeling of helplessness was really the scary part. Knowing at that time, I physically possessed the means to end it, but he fear of social backlash paralyzed me. Sure I could stop her from groping me, but would that stop some random MMA expert who just hears me in a confrontation with a woman and immediately assumes I'm the instigator from pummeling me into the floorboards?
Had a girl physically hold me down and say "I can't believe you're saying no." It was very uncomfortable. It didn't go any further than that but I still can't believe she assumed that I wanted to have sex with her.
A "friend" stopped over, I was taking a shower, when I got out, I was in a towel and she followed me. We were friends and it wasn't that big of a deal, since the was nothing even remotely sexual happening. I sat down to do something and hadn't changed yet and she forced herself on me. I said no many times and she just said "I want it, just do it" repeatedly. I became hard because I was terrified. She then wrapped her arms and legs around me and forced me inside of her. She is a taller girl so it wasn't easy getting her off. I kept saying no, but she started saying she's on birth control don't worry about it... Like that's what I was fucking saying no about. I finally got her off and asked her to leave. Thank god I haven't seen her since.
I'm a male nurse (RN/BSN) in the USA. When I was in my 20's a lot of older female nurses didn't like me/like working with me. Not all, but enough to make it a trend.
Anyway, this one would go out of her way to give me a hard time/make my life hell. I got picked for a minor supervisor position over her, and she was angry about it. So much so that she sexually assaulted me, on the unit, in front of 2 other nurses.
We had a disagreement about assignments and she flew off the handle. She grabbed me by the balls, twisted, and said "You think you're a big fuck around here! You're nothing but a little prick!"
I pushed her away, and left as I was finished with my shift. I contacted the on-duty supervisor and reported her. The next day I met with my boss, who said she had been contacted by the woman and told that I shoved her for no reason when she merely asked me to change assignments.
The other 2 nurses lied and said they saw/heard nothing (except the shove - they remembered that). My boss (female) took her (the offender's) side. I got no help until I went to HR and threatened to quit and sue.
Ultimately, CCTV tape was reviewed and the truth came out. The offender was fired immediately afterward.
No disciplinary action was taken against my boss for ignoring me or the other nurses who lied when they were visible on the tape standing right there staring.
My story is that I moved out from living with my mother and stayed with my dad and his at the time girlfriend, and I stayed there for about 4 months until 'it' happened and I had to leave.
I went out with a good friend of mine and we had a few too many drinks, partied a bit, took some stuff it probably wasn't legal to take and by the end of the night I could barely walk, or stand up so I got my friend - who was less drunk than me - to call my dad and have him pick me up.
He drove me to his and I was in a pretty bad state as I slowly sobered up, I kept saying i thought I was going to die and my dad eventually got the story out of me about what happened and he left me with his girlfriend, whilst he went to drive back to where my friend was - presumably to shout at him? I don't know.
That was when she took advantage of me. I struggle to even type it actually, sometimes thinking about it makes me feel pathetic or weak. She was a good looking girl is the thing but she was my dad's girlfriend and there was a girl I actually liked so I didn't want sex, especially not with my dad's girlfriend. But she managed to somehow get me hard, despite the booze, and then she was aggressive, man-handling me, scratching me, and verbally abusive. In all honesty, I was scared. I had had the night from hell and this woman was making it worse, and I was scared my dad would hate me, scared that I couldn't tell anyone after it, and I kept repeating to myself how pathetic I was just taking it like that. I just laid there, with so many thoughts going through my head, and at one point I cried - though I think she thought it was from drinking too much.
what happened afterwards was that she told my dad I raped her, and to cut a long story short, eventually he relented and admitted he didn't believe I had done that to her - and when I has mentioned it was actually HER who was the rapist, he basically didn't believe me and just said that 'you can just say you two slept together, you don't need to make up ridiculous lies'.I basically cut ties with him for a bit after that because he steadfastly refused to believe I - a male - could be forced into sex.
This is a super long text dump, so I'll probably stop here. Even if no one reads it, it feels mildly therapeutic being able to speak frankly as honestly about it
I was at a party and had quite a few to drink. There was a girl there that I had seen before and thought was very attractive. On this particular night, I noticed that she was looking at me a lot and I was drunk so why not talk to her. After a little while she invited me to the bathroom and I went with her.
She asked me to leave the lights off and started going down on me. I noticed something was off and turned on the light to find her and a man giving me a blow job. I freaked out and pushed them both away and left the bathroom. The man then tried to push it off on me by acting like a victim and saying he's tired of everyone using him as their experiment. I had no desire for this to happen and had never communicated anything like that to him.
It basically turns out that he asked her to flirt with me and offer me a BJ and he snuck into the bathroom behind us to join in, thinking I would be totally OK with this for some reason. I never reported it because I was a teenager (18) and didn't know how to handle the situation.
I'm mostly over it at this point, but I still think about it and get a little freaked out.
When I was 21 I was raped by the girl who was my girlfriend at the time. We had been together for almost a year and half and she had been living with me for 5 months before she raped me. We did not argue much but when we did argue it was about me not buying something for her.
I supported her for 5 months while she did not have a job, and I was able to do so but I wasn't able to afford $11 dollar boxes of organic oats or designer hand bags, shoes, dinners out weekly, etc. I often found myself putting my foot down and not spending on unnecessary expenses.
Slowly over time her resistance to my resistance grew and I figured out after that she was hoping to get me angry because she was into getting me riled up and then seducing me because we always had passionate make up sex. Anyways, she started to ask for more. Not just more things like clothes, health products, misc items but also more things in bed.
For a long time (3 months maybe) she tried to convince me to let her finger me while she gave me a blow job or while we had sex. I stuck to my guns for a really long time but eventually I was manipulated into allowing her to try it once. I was constantly told how selfish I was, things of that nature that led me to let her. She did it and I didn't like it. I told her how it wasn't for me and how I wasn't comfortable with it. She told me she understood and that she was happy that I tried.
Over the next couple months she started to do it while I slept. I would wake up and she would be doing it while she blew me. Sometimes I woke up partially and was too tired to do anything about it but when I did wake up I made her stop every time. I would get very mad at her and not talk to her the next day. She would then get mad at me and redirect the blame and convince me that I was wrong. I ended up apologizing to her every time. I grew to accept it. Even though I didn't like it I knew that if I said anything or complained about it that she would throw such a fit that made my brain start to rot from stress that it wasn't worth me putting up a fight. Luckily she started to lose interest in doing it after a while after I stopped caring about it. In the short term it was good for me, but in the long run it was bad.
The worst day of my life was when she decided to tie me up. She told me all the dirty things she was going to do to me while she kissed my neck and whispered into my ear as she tied my arms and legs down to the bed. Everything she said she was going to do was normal to me (suck me, ride me) so I let her tie me up. After I was tied up she asked me to try to break free and offered a reward to me if I could. She said she would be back and if I wasn't free then I would miss out on the reward.
She came back and stood at the door and stared at me. She then told me how I wasn't going to be rewarded because I couldn't get out. She then told me she was going to punish me. Long story short, she ended up sodomizing me with her vibrator. I must have said no a thousand times. I was crying, and begging her to stop which in hindsight probably made it worse. I was anally fucked, then she tried to ride me but I couldn't even get up. I was so broken emotionally and in pain physically. She then got very mad that I couldn't get it up which was never a problem. I was beaten for a while. Then the vibrator again while being hit. It lasted about 6 or 7 hours but felt like it was a dozen. For a while she just left it in me while she went in the other room to watch tv. It was mid day when she tied me up and had been dark for a few hours after it was over. I ended up falling asleep tied up. I think I just passed out more from exhaustion of trying to break free/get her to stop. I woke up and I was untied in bed by myself. Memories of the night before started to come back to me. I managed to get up and stumble to the bathroom and noticed her making breakfast. It felt like I had to go but it hurt too much to continue to try. I walked back out of the bathroom and she was all smiles. It triggered the memory of her smirk that she had while I cried in pain while I was tied up.
I didn't say a word to her. Just sat down on the couch. She came over and was acting like everything was fine. She ended up making some kind of "what's wrong? why are you so upset about it?" comment and I snapped. I exclaimed my feelings, told her how awful she was, and I broke up with her. Cue her rage rampage. I was hit, slapped, punched, scratched at, had plates/glasses thrown at me, the fan, laundry, clothes, the tv remote, literally anything that was not bolted down. All I could do was try to separate myself from her in my tiny apartment while I dodged punches and thrown items. I knew that I couldn't hit back. And I am glad I didn't. I ended up calling the police which was the best decision I had ever made. The second I called them she calmed down and started to behave. They got there pretty quickly. Of course once they were there she played the damsel in distress and claimed that I was beating her up and choking her etc. I told the cop everything that happened which was embarrassing but worth it. They arrested her and she was jailed. I was questioned extensively and given many speeches about "if you are lying about this". Eventually I was sent to the hospital to be checked out/have a rape kit performed.
Fast forward to a couple weeks after that, I got the F out of there. I moved and got a lawyer. She was forced out of my apartment when I called the cops because she did not pay any rent and we weren't married so I was safe there but I didn't feel entirely safe there knowing that she might try to contact me again. Because she was not from my city I got a restraining order that kept her out of state. I had the option to press charges but ended up choosing not to after consulting with my lawyer.
He explained to me that many people seek to press charges as a means of trying to solve their problems and that mostly it doesn't fix the problem you have and it demoralizes you because you have to talk about what happened in front of a judge, other lawyers and worst of all her. I decided that if she ended up spending years in jail it wouldn't change how safe I felt or my emotional state. I felt safe enough having a restraining order and was happy to not ever tell anyone about what happened ever again or even mention it.
Being raped has ruined my life for the time being.
When I was raped I was half way through my undergraduate degree. A year and a half later and I'm no closer to finishing it than I was despite continuing to attend school. I still have about 40% of my degree to complete. I should have already graduated. I no longer feel comfortable with anything that restrains you. Roller coasters, the little loop attached to a camera that you put around your wrist, even seat belts. I put up with the seat belt though and I'm getting used to it again.
I haven't had sex since I was raped. I've tried with three different women. Two were random hook ups, one of them I started to cry and just got dressed and left my own apartment. I told her she could stay the night and didn't return to my place until 4pm the next day. The other one I lied and said I just wasn't feeling great and "fell asleep". The third woman I tried to have sex with my latest ex girlfriend. We had been dating for a couple months and decided to hold off on sex (her decision which I was happy with). When we started to try I couldn't get it up. Anyway, that ruined that relationship pretty quickly because she felt she wasn't good enough for me or pretty enough. We ended up mutually breaking up and I didn't tell what happened to me until after we broke up. I have mostly good days now, but still have bad streaks. Therapy was helpful for the first 4 months or so but started to lose it's value to me when I started to block all my thoughts and feeling towards everything and saved it up for that one hour time block every tuesday.
Being raped by a girl doesn't seem like it is possible and our society makes it out to be something that is not a bad thing which is wrong. "Men don't get raped" and "men can't get raped" are what I hear most often. Even something as innocent as "I was raped by that test" is enough to trigger memories for me. Things I enjoyed before are less interesting, I don't care about as much as I used to and I generally hate all forms of contact aside from the howie mandel fist bump or a high five.
My wounds are still fresh and while I am getting better it is taking time. A lot of time. I don't know when I'll be back to myself or if I'll ever be the same but I plan on trying to move on like I have been doing for the last year and a bit. I hope that one day I can help other people who have been in the same situation as me by raising funds or starting some type of organization that pairs therapists with youth who can't afford therapy and give it to them for free. I don't see that happening for a long time, but when I can give back this is what I will give to.
When I was 10 this neighbor girl who was 17/18 would drop by to swim in our pool on hot summer days. A few times she would say that we should play a game called "nude show" where we would show each other our genitals and she would touch mine until I got an erection. It didn't feel bad at the time and I had no knowledge of what sex was at the time so I didn't think much of it and thought it was some great thing that nobody knew about. One time she got me hard and wanted to experiment with anal so I put it in her ass and started having sex with her. I remember an adult came out in the back so we stopped and quickly put clothes on but I remember being so afraid that somebody was going to find out what happened that day where every phone call made me panic for years. Now looking back at it, she fully knew what was going on and molested me.
When I was in my early 20's I moved to a big city. Ended up moving in with this (seemingly) nice older woman, in her 50's. We talked a lot, and she would cook for me sometimes. I had a gut feeling that something wasn't right, but she seemed so nice. Turns out that she was drugging the food and molesting me, went on for two months until one morning I woke up with one of her hairs coiled around the tip of my penis (I'm not circumcised). I moved out immediately and went to the police. They literally laughed at me and said that a woman can't do that to a man. Took years of therapy to open up to a physical relationship with anybody.
Freshman in college end of school year, get drunk with some friends to celebrate, after one to many shots of jose Cuervo I asked this girl whom house I was at if I could crash somewhere, she was a bigger girl whom i had no interest in any sexual relations with. She takes me up to her room and leaves so I figured we would share the bed or whatever. I wake up 30-40 minutes later with a big weight on me. She is riding me and i can't stand up i ended up punching her square in the face and getting out of there.
My friends and I went down to beach week right after high school graduation, basically all the high school kids get houses and hotels at a large tourist beach area and hang out and drink all week. So I had gotten my own house but decided to drink one night and stay out and crash at a buddies that was closer once we were all done.
I ended up not knowing my limits as a dumb high school kid and got black out drunk to the point I remember only tiny slivers of bits and pieces of the night. What I do remember is N, the name I refer to as my rapist, wasn't drinking at all and when we got back to my buddies house, me throwing up in the toilet and her rubbing my hair while I was vomiting. I then remember passing out on the couch downstairs, N had her own bedroom at this place upstairs.
I woke up the next morning crazy sticky and sweaty in a twin bed with N. A condom still half way on my flaccid penis and absolutely no memory of how I arrived at this place. So I get up without waking her up and go shower immediately and go downstairs to talk to another dude who crashed on the couch next to me that night who was fairly sober. Apparently what happened was N came downstairs and asked if I wanted some water and then told me to come upstairs with her to get it. Couch buddy told me he then heard me halfheartedly arguing that I wanted to go back to sleep downstairs and that I ended up basically yelling, "No, I don't wanna go to your bedroom!" After that he said it was quiet and he didn't know what was going on so he went to sleep. I also found out that N had gone to the guy who had rented this place out and asked for condoms and apparently told him what was going on and he just gave her the condoms.
So after finding all of this out and N still being asleep, I didn't know how to react to any of them after I was raped and they were all fully aware of what was going on and took no actions to stop it at all. So I called up another friend who picked me up in about a half hour and went back to my place and basically didn't leave the bedroom I was in for the next two days, in a combination of terribly hangover and confusion on how to feel about this. I just decided to never talk to any of them again and not really bother addressing it.
Couch buddy called me about a week later asking how I was doing and what not. There was no fallout for N when she woke up and everyone there was kinda of the mindset that "eh, He got laid, granted not by someone he wanted but he still got laid by an okay looking girl." The only one who thought the situation was fucked up was couch buddy. I refused to talk to anyone besides couch buddy who was there after that.
The long term affects, this was 7 years ago now, I still won't drink to get anything beyond a heavy buzz because I associate anything more as a complete feeling of helplessness and powerlessness, which I never had before this incident. I immediately develop whiskey dick any time I even taste alcohol, again never had a problem before. Finally lost a good group of friends because I wouldn't see the "Bright Side" that I had gotten laid.
I ended up seeing her again about 4 years later on a college campus when I was visiting a mutual friend, I had no idea she was coming over and he didn't either, as he knew our history, but she heard I was up there through the grapevine and decided it would be a good time to try and patch things up. As soon as she walked in, I got up, went to the closest door, walked in, and shut it behind me. After about thirty seconds N said, "Hey, you know that's a closet right?" I responded yep and just stayed in there til she left. So yep that's basically that story.
When I was 22 I passed out after taking a Xanax at a friends house
He, his wife and their friends went to the strip club.
They were in an open marriage but I guess got into an argument because he was going to fuck a girl she didn't like.
I woke up to her dragging me into her room and taking off my clothes telling me "he would be sorry" (I had been "off limits" to her because I was his friend)
I couldn't move for awhile, both from the drugs and the shock. I finally was able to push her off and run to another room.
It's really fucked up my relationships since then.
I don't feel worth while to be around or that anyone cares that I exist
I tried to talk to my family but no one responds.
I told my mom and she never said another word about it.
Sucks. I feel like somehow I'm the bad guy.
Depression and since than I had a stroke and went half blind.
When I was 16 I was invited to a friends for some drinking. I thought it sounded like fun, I've never had a drink before so why not. When I get there It's just me. I'm still game, I love hanging out with this friend. She's like my best friend. The whole time I'm there she's feeding me drinks. I thought nothing of it at the time. Well things go on for a while and I find myself too drunk to physically resist anything. I still tried to say something but it didn't help. It really fucked with my head. It's been years and I still have issues getting close or being vulnerable in front of people. I mean thats my best friend how can they do something like that. At the time I wasn't even sexually active. After that it was years until I could be intimate with another person. Until now only I've only told 2 other people: my father and my girlfriend.
Babysitter forced me to eat her out.
On my 19th birthday after many birthday shots I tried to stumble home and a fat chick picked me up and threw me into a cab and took me to her place where she proceeded to have her way with me.
At a bar I had my groin and ass fondled by a woman while I was at the bar buying a drink for my girlfriend at the time... I turned and told her to "fuck off" she goes and says something to the bouncers and I am told to leave.
I keep that shit to myself because people just laugh and go "ahahaha.. you wanted it"
Was raised by a single mother and we had a lot of european au pairs live with us while they went to school in the USA.
One of the earlier ones would have me eat her out, but I had no idea what was going on. Eventually one day I brought it up like it was nothing in front of my mom, because I thought it was nothing. The au pair soon disappeared and I had no idea what happened was wrong for a few years.
I think this started when I was about 10 (maybe earlier?), and by the time I was 13 I would just walk to and from school and go unsupervised, generally taking care of myself most the day. I don't think she wanted to take another risk, but we never spoke about it.
A co-worker was getting married and I was invited to his bachelor party, it was in a town about 30 miles away so we took two cars loaded up with guys and off we went to a strip club. I'd been to this place one other time and knew it sucked, but they had pool tables and low alcohol 3.2% beer (this was in Kansas) so I figured it would be fine. I didn't drive. It was December and cold out.
I'm playing pool while these other guys are up by the stage watching the slag looking stripper. The waitress comes over and asks if I want another pitcher of their swill. Sure, I've got nothing else to do. She returns with my beer, comes over to me, and just sticks her tongue in my ear, slathering it around, and then "purrs" ugghh "Come upstairs with me, I'll give you a blowjob, on the house."
"No, um, I'm married and I'm fine, thanks for the offer though."
"You can't seriously be turning down a blowjob?"
"I told you I'm not into it, thanks for the beer."
Also, she was not attractive. Not that it would have mattered but yuk! She stalks off and a couple minutes later two bouncers come over to me and physically toss me out the back door so fast it made my head spin. The back door locked, nobody in my group saw this. It's like 15 degrees F outside, it's just gotten dark, and my coat is on a chair inside. I run back to the front and attempt to go back in but the bouncers won't let me. I'm jumping up and down yelling and they have apparently cranked the music up and nobody can hear me inside. One of the bouncers pulls a knife out and says "Leave now while you can."
I can't go sit in a car, my car wasn't there and the two we came in are locked. This was in the late 80's, nobody had cell phones. I walked two miserable miles to a convenience store, call my wife up, and ask her to call this place and page my co-worker, say it's an emergency. A few minutes later my co-worker and a friend show up with my jacket and I convince them to leave, we go back and get everyone and leave. Turns out the waitress was the daughter of the owner and she did that shit all the time.
I was at a wedding with my then-fiance, now-wife on the dance floor, when I felt a slap on my ass. I turned around to see a woman I don't know smiling and eyeing me and gave her a similar response of "don't fucking touch me." My wife didn't believe me for quite some time, and it makes me sick to my stomach to this day. It wasn't emotionally scarring like a lot of the other stories here, but it certainly gave me a more profound sense of empathy for victims of unwanted sexual advances and worse.
My mother molested me from age 7maybe earlier can't rightly tell) to 12 when I moved out.
It started with just motherly stuff then got worse as time went on.
She made me have sex with her 6 months after the abuse started.
She used to tell me this is punishment for my dad leaving her.
It took a long time to figure out something wasn't normal. I was also being mentally and physically abused by her as well.
I have zero contact with her now and the statute of limitations have come and gone by now (27 right now).
Big girl I worked with got drunk at the bars so I gave her a ride home. I helped her up the stairs (3 stories in heels = death) and was putting her sloppy drunk ass to bed. She pulled me onto her bed and pinned me under her while she groped/tried to kiss me/tried to rip my pants off for a good while. I protested but could not do much for fear I would piss her off/leave a mark so she could cry rape. After about an hour she relented and I went home.Â
In high school I had these girls always grope at my crotch and grab my dick on the bus to and from school. Eventually one stopped but the other kept doing it and I didn't feel like I could say "Stop" because I'm a guy and I'm supposed to want that.
And recently, I've been getting memories of when I was 3(maybe even 2) when a babysitter bought her boyfriend over a few times. I distinctly have one memory of me lying down on his lap with my pants down and him touching my crotch and even once inserting into my butt. I don't know if my babysitter had been involved or not, but unfortunately, I'm still having trouble trying to get over it because people just laugh at the high school stories and say "Wow, you're lucky" and I can't gain the courage to tell family or friends about the babysitter boyfriend stories and also don't want them to pursue it and make it come out to light for the rest of my family and friends to find out about. But it's one of the reasons I think I'm afraid to pursue girls and one of the reasons I broke up with my ex girlfriend. I think I started to be afraid of something, but I don't know what.
Rape, sexual harassment, assault, abuse isn't something that should happen to anyone. Â my babysitter had to have known. I consider her part of the guilty party which is why I decided to post this. It's the first time I've ever told anyone about it. I considered making a throwaway but I don't want those occurrences to run my life any more than they may have already.
A girl in my dorm during freshman year came to our room to hang out. We didn't really invite her, we just always had our door open and she stopped by to chat. After chatting for awhile we threw in a movie and she came back up with brownies and punch. I thought the brownies might be special so I left them alone and the punch didn't smell of alcohol so I had some. Turns out she roofied the punch. I only had a little but I could feel it starting to kick my ass. My roommates were either gone or had left to meet their girlfriends at that point and so she proceeded to get me into my bed and blow me while I tried to remember how to say words. Everything was in and out of focus and I felt hammered. I squirmed while she was then attempting to push her body into my mouth before I was able to force her off my bed. It was raised a few feet off the ground so she had a short fall and I think it jarred her enough to where she realized she needed to leave. Never talked to her again except a few times when she drunk texted me.
The lines that still bounce around in my head in the quiet hours of the night:
"I will take care of you and then I will let you take care of me"
"This isn't personal, just two people getting each other off"
"I knew you would resist the first time so the pills are to help you realize how much you will enjoy it"
Never told anyone, never will outside of this.
It slowed me down for a bit and I got lost in a lot of pot and booze. All good today though for the most part. I have emotionally detached myself from that memory and moved on.
When i was 19 i went to a party after going clubbing with friends, we were really rather drunk. when we got to the afterparty we started drinking heavy because it was free alcohol. i am almost certain i took some other drug there, but unsure what it was because the night is really not clear other than a few moments that are burned and scarred into my memory. after talking with other people for awhile i managed to walk into a hallway looking for my friends i came with, i was pulled into a room and pushed onto a mattress/cushion by a female acquaintance, she ripped my shirt off and pulled down my pants. a male friend of hers turned up moments later and closed the door. i drifted in and out of consciousness while she sat ontop of me (im unsure if i hit my head on something hard when she pushed me) not allowing me to leave even after attempting to get up and saying "i got to go"
both of them did things to me.
im still depressed and have been unable to form any relationship to this day, been near the verge of suicide a few times. ive never told anyone what really happened to me that night it wasnt that long ago, im younger than 25
I split up with the mother of my kid when she was 3 years. She only allowed me to see my kid at her place and only if i would have sex with her afterwards. Went for some time till she lost interest.
I was at a graduation party getting ready to go to graduate school. I drank, we all drank. I drank too much and got sick and went into one of the side rooms to lay down. I woke up to a girl holding my hand against her crotch so that a finger was inside of her. Her hand was on my penis (she had pulled them down). She smiled and when I realized what was going on I turned away and went back to sleep.
She acted like nothing happened. I'm not sure what I think. With all the hypersensitivity around this issue I feel like I should be horrified but I'm not.
This one is going to sound very mild compared to the other experiences here, but it happened during an already screwed up time.
I was in a church class for Confirmation, so this was during puberty. To be frank, apart from one guy, everyone there disliked me at least a bit, and that isn't just due to bullying: I was a weird fucking kid. To the pastor, I was mostly invisible, not saying much but not making trouble either.
Well, there were two girls from my school in this class, and while they didn't find much opportunity to bully me in school, they took this class as the time for that. One meeting, I had to sit next to one of them. Out of nowhere, she started whispering cheesy declarations of infatiuation into my ear and put a hand on my thigh. I also felt a leg slide against mine, but I'm not sure if that was hers or that of her friend, who was darkly giggling about what was happening every once in a while.
I told them to knock it off, but that just made them quietly laugh. Her hand slid slowly up my thigh while she whispered that she wanted me. I was both painfully hard and completely hated everything about the situation. I didn't want to be there, and I am sure my face must have been red hot with embarrasement. I tried scooting over to tze other side, but soon ran out of space, knocking into the guy left of me. She continued up and started rubbing, well, there. I wanted to sink into the ground, to be struck by a meteor, anything to get away. I knew I couldn't tell the pastor - if a puberty-plagued boy claims he was being touched by a girl and two girls claim that he is the one doing the inappropriate touching, well I knew who'd catch the heat from the pastor. So I just endured it until, an eternity later, we were allowed to leave.
The two of them continued the bullying, but I think at least the girl doing the touching eventually understood what she had done. She later tried to befriend me, but obviously I wasn't open to that.
I have been sexually assaulted three times.
The first time it was a priest that was watching me while I was sick. Because that's out of the scope of the question, I won't elaborate.
The second time was in 5th grade. I don't want to go into too much detail because a few of my friends are Redditors, but suffice it to say, the teacher from the adjacent class room began to rub my face and tell me how handsome I was. She began to move her hand down and began rubbing in ... other areas. I was aroused and confused all at the same time. I am now a young adult and have only recently told people about this. As far as I know, she is still a teacher.
The third time, I was a senior in high school and got drunk at a girl's party. I had a girlfriend at the time who was older and in college. As the night was coming to a conclusion, I found a place to crash (as my friends were hooking up with each other and the like). I woke up around 4:30 with a girl's hand down my pants. She was doing stuff and trying to get me to have sex with her. I told a few of my friends about it. They didn't say much.
Over all, it really hasn't effected my life all that much. Don't get me wrong, I think it's fucked up that all of that happened - especially with regards to 1 and 2 because of their age and position. I find it annoying that sexual assault is always in the context of men being the predator given my experiences. Because of the utter absence of any meaningful dialogue from parents, teachers, etc on the subject, I think most guys just don't talk about it and if we do then other men don't know how to respond. It's weird.
This is in no way counting the dozens of times women have grabbed my ass or cock in bars and other social settings without my consent. Nor does it include the times where women have started trying to make out with me out of no where. This stuff happens A LOT more than people realize/talk about.
I was 17 and had stopped by a friend of a friends house. I knew her well enough to feel ok hanging out with her, plus her parents were never home so at the time I thought that was cool. We watched tv for a while in her room before she started showing me stuff in her room. Every time she'd go to get something she'd crawl over me across the bed to get it. After a few passes, being 17, having an attractive girl on top of me, and being alone with her caused me to become aroused. She noticed and began to rub her hands on my crotch. I had a girlfriend at the time so I pushed her away and slid down onto the floor. She became more forceful, sat on my lap, told me I obviously wanted her. I tried to push her off and she fought back, had better leverage and pushed me to the floor. I told her to get off me, I didn't want to cheat on my girlfriend and that I was going to leave. She leaned down and pressed her lips against mine, then told me that if I left without fucking her she would just tell everyone we did anyways, but if I just did what she wanted she'd let me go. She took my pants off and started to put my dick inside her. I tried again to push her off but she slapped me, pushed me back down and forced herself down on my dick. She rode me for a while, got herself off then finally got off me. I went home, barely ever talked to her again and never really told anyone.
It was upsetting but I don't think it ever effected me like it does other men. I still had plenty of sexual escapades as I grew up, got married, have two kids.
I don't know what happened to that girl.
Had been flirting with a girl who a month or so before had broken with her boyfriend (whom I did not know). We were both part of a group of friends and one night the group went out for drinks. She was uncharacteristically aggressive in her flirting this night and I realised her ex was in the same bar as us (a friend pointed him out to me).
The fact that she changed behaviour because of his presence meant to me that she was not at all over him and I didn't like the way she made a big show out of the attention she directed at me (it was clearly less for my sake than the ex'). So when she told me we were leaving so we could go back to her apartment and have sex, I declined. She then got extremely angry and slapped me. She followed it up with a mixture of verbal stick and carrot and a few more attempts at slapping me (I was prepared so I caught the hands in the air as they moved towards me).
Was not a pleasant experience.
Just wanted to add that what I consider minor things like catcalling and groping is something I have experienced on several occasions too. I don't really let that phase me since I just choose to see it as a misguided attempt at getting attention/flattery from socially aggressive women. But I guess it could fall into the category of sexual harassment.
When I was about 7 or 8, my dad married another woman. They married in our original country and then while waiting for her visa to come through, he had me visit her.
It started out small, just having me touch her or she wouldn't let me play with my toys. It eventually turned into her having me lay on top of her with both of us naked. I didn't understand what was going on. I just knew that it felt weird. I'd pray during the day that it wouldn't happen. I stopped believing in religion when I figured out what had happened.
How has it affected me? I went through life balling any kind of emotion up and hiding them away. I'd feel ashamed at the weirdest things. I had a lack of empathy for most any situation. And... the strangest of all is that whenever I see a transformer, I get this panic sensation (my toys were transformers).
I thought everything was fine and I was just going through life. A little angrier than I should have been. A little more high strung than I should have been. Eventually I found alcohol. And after a string of events, everything spiraled out of control. I had started going to therapy and a psychiatrist because I guess I had reached a point where my brain could no longer just hide things away. And then I attempted suicide on my antidepressants, sleeping pills and xanax and a bottle of whiskey. That was earlier this year.
Long story short. I'm 33 now, and I'm now on 2 antidepressants, require trazodone to sleep, and regularly take benzos because of debilitating panic attacks. I still breakdown in my therapists office whenever we attempt to talk about my childhood. But at least I'm confronting it now, and trying to live 'normally', whatever that means.
When I was 8 or so I was dropped off at the babysitter's all day. She didn't pay much attention, more interested in her soap operas and such.
Her son was a can-do-no-wrong type of son in her eyes. But he was an evil kid. He was older, mid-teens
This may be disjointed. Apologies. '
The son would get me alone in the parents bedroom and have me sit on the bed, show me his fathers adult magazines. Then try to take my clothes off. The first time it happened I tried to leave, and he told me he'd tell his parents that I was going through their stuff and playing with those magazines and that he found me doing it.
I froze. The father scared the crap out of me. The reaction mine would have scared me more.
He had his way after that. I was just frozen solid. Which pissed him off, so he started hitting and choking me.
He threw me down the stairs when he was done. To cover up the damage, I suppose.
This continued for about 2 years. Locked in closets, thrown down stairs, locked in a dark basement. Fondled, touched, raped, made to blow the fucker. Mother off gossiping with the neighbors, or watching her goddamned soap operas.
Parents never noticed. Latch-key kid and all that. Those bruises? Eh, I fell. I'm walking funny? Oh, I fell. I'm quiet? Oh, I don't feel well. Do I want to sleep over? No. Oh, we think it'd be nice. You don't have many friends and he seems like a really nice boy. Mom, I really don't want to sleep over. What are those bruises on your neck? We were wrestling. The kid down the street taught us how to box today.
Parents get notified I'm acting odd in school. Fighting a lot, etc. Go for therapy., I'm not telling anyone anything. Just not happening. But I am angry. And I keep freezing whenever that creep comes near me. I don't fight back? WTF? Why am I not standing upon for myself?
We finally moved and things got a bit better for a bit. I was pretty screwed up after that. It's more or less permanent.
New neighbor moves in. Son is an odd duck, but he tries to be friends with me, and I figure I'm not usually friendly anymore. Then the touching starts. The dropping of the pants. The "experimenting" The groping, etc.
Then someone sees us in the woods doing this. And yells he's going to tell my father. Part of me hopes so, and part of me is terrified.
Father is trying the kick-the-crap-out-of-the-kid method of corrective love for my anger and acting out. Like I'm going to tell someone like that what's going on, why I'm wetting the bed all the time, why I scream out at night, and hate to be hugged or touched. Why I'm not normal. Why I shake and prefer books to people. Why I can't stand crowds, and want to stay in my cave/room all the time. Why you can't close me in places and I hate feeling boxed in.
This isn't me. This is someone else.
He keeps at it, and to my eternal shame and guilt, I let him. He tries something with my sister. This is enough for me to go after him. I may be a guilt and shame-ridden coward, but he will not harm my family. Eventually we move again. I start carrying knives all the time. I vow it won't happen again.
I'm a young male. I get erections all the time with no rhyme or reason. I stand up from reading at the couch as the family is going somewhere and try to delay going out to the car. Father wants to leave that moment. I try covering my front with a book. He pulls it away and laughs, then slaps my erection through my pants and says you'll get control of it one day. I'm in a state of righteous rage and mortified fear.
I am groped in school while being bullied by a group of particularly nasty assholes. They think it's funny, I freak out and tell the principal I will sue for sexual harassment. To their credit, they stopped it that day.
Early twenties a young woman has her hands all over me and I am very uncomfortable. I tell her I am not interested in anything and think that's all settled. I drink in another room with some friends. Black out and wake up a few hours later all disheveled, to friends telling me she had gotten my clothes off and was trying to fuck me on the couch when they went out for a smoke. She works fast. They stopped her. I screamed at her to stay the fuck away from me the next time I saw her.
So many things happen in the years in between this and the next incident, but none of them sexual, all of them damaging. Five attempts at suicide. Four hospitalizations. Bankruptcy, nightmares that never stop. Insomnia that never releases me. PTSD, behavioral problems, medication changes, fights, etc.
I'm in a Neurologist's office, having a very hard time coping with the fact that I'm very sick at a relatively young age, and being given hell by my employer for trying to get treated.
I'm being given the nerve conduction test. While some of the shocks are happening in my hand, The Neurologist brushes my crotch. I am laying on my back for the test. I figure it's innocent and accidental, but I'm uncomfortable. Test continues. Now I'm being groped and it's not an accident. I freeze. I have three knives on me and I freeze. Pressure increases, and I'm just starting to hyperventilate. The pain from the test isn't helping either.
It doesn't go any farther for some reason. I just want out of there. The needles are pulled out, I don't remember anything he says to me, I barely acknowledge the staff as I run out and have a full blown breakdown in the car. I drive home in a blur.
I lost my job, ended up hospitalized for weeks. I had gone home, drank until I blacked out and my wife found me covered in blood with hundreds of cuts on my body.
I am currently bankrupt, in recovery for alcohol, eating disorders, body image, etc., unbelievably neurotic and completely fucked up.
So here's to you, pedophiles and rapists of the world. May you all die agonizing deaths.
And thank you, autocorrect, for actually making me chuckle by correcting "fuck" to "duck" constantly as I recount my numerous horrors in life.
I met up with a girl. I did not want sex, I just wanted to hang out but she pestered me and climbed ontop of me until she realized 'you actually don't want it'. Makes me wonder what would of happened if the genders were flipped. Bonus story, a guy once sat next to me on a bus at 6AM and told me 'he wants to take me to a gay bar'. He then described the various sexual acts he would like to do in explicit detail and tried to kiss and grope me until i pushed him away. Still freaks me out to this day. I was actually in shock.
Once i was drinking down in Florida with my girlfriend. We were walking down the main road and she had to go to the bathroom, we went into a random bar, happened to be a gay bar. She went to the bathroom and while i was waiting a guy probably mid 30s came up behind me and started kissing my ear, i turned around shoved him into the table behind us, he fell, i got kicked out, because what could be considered molesting happened within a gay community and they took the gay guys side
I was "raped" about 3 years ago by a friend of mine. We were all out at a bar, and I was flirting with a girl (who was a friend of the girl that raped me) that I knew wanted to hook up with me. We all ended up getting pretty drunk, and going back to my buddies house who lived close by. Me and the girl I was talking to all night went upstairs, and started fooling around when my other friend busted in the room and just started watching. I told her to go away, and she told me I should go sleep on the couch because that was where she was going to sleep. I ignored her and continued making out with her friend. About 30 seconds later while I was making out with her friend she started sucking my dick. I was drunk and on my back, and enjoying the other friend's company, but told her to stop and get away from me. She and her friend started laughing. She then told me again to go downstairs because that's where she was sleeping. Her friend then started sucking dick and told me to relax. It felt pretty awesome. Then her friend pulled down her pants and sat on my face. I was doing my thing when out of no where the other girl sat on my dick (without a condom) and started grinding me. I freaked out threw her off me, and went downstairs to sleep on the couch. I wouldn't exactly call it rape because I didn't feel emotionally scarred or anything, but I was really pissed off the next day, and feel uncomfortable seeing or hanging out with this girl to this day. Worst part is they told my friends about it, and it is something people joke about. Apparently she has done somethign similar to another friend of mine where he got really drunk, she took him home, and he was filled with regret the next day.
Nothing too bad but this does stick in my memory... A friend of mine was on again, off again involved with this really really crazy girl. It was the summer after high school, and they were having a party at her house.
Basically, she got drunk and tried to straddle me and sit on me and was undoing my pants. I didn't want any of it at all because a) she was involved with my friend so it would've been bad and b) I didn't want it anyway. So I told her to stop and struggled for a bit (it's kind of hard if you're lying flat on the ground) but she wouldn't listen. Eventually I pushed her off me and got up and kind of left the situation.
I'm not like scarred for life because of it or anything, but it's interesting how everyone I've mentioned this to has brushed it off, laughed about it, etc. I feel like as a man I'm conditioned to not think it's a big deal either.
I was raped by a girl I somewhat knew when I was a freshman in college.
Me and a few friends were at a somewhat large party, at least for the college we go to (all-in-all about 50 people were at the party). Their were 4 of us in out group I'll call them A,B,C, and cold (cold is me). A few hours after the party started everyone was very intoxicated because we were all freshmen and didn't know how to drink responsibly (see theres a moral to this story too!). Anyway, A, my best friend (who is a boy) is chatting up B (who is a very attractive girl) and I know he likes her so I decide to wingman him (because thats what bros do), even though I know B likes him too (high school relationship stuff creeps into college too, who knew?). This means that I end up talking to C (who is overweight but isn't like super obese) when I'm not talking A up to B. To me, even drunk, I can clearly feel that C is interested in me, but I dropped subtle hints to tell her that I wasn't interested (e.g. "look at my phone background of my girlfriend and I", "Oh you like this shirt? It's my girlfriends favorite too.", and "Sorry, but I have a girlfriend"). Eventually, B notices that I'm uncomfortable and tells C something along the lines "Hey C, cold has a very cutegirlfriend that wouldn't appreciate this type of attention" (Obviously, she said nothing that intelligent because she was very drunk at this point) and C backs off and starts talking to some other dudes. She glances at me every once in a while, but I ignore her and talk to some other dudes about what pokemon generation was the best (Gen. 2, btw) or something stupid like that. About 30 minutes later A and B decide to go back to B's dorm room to have some sexy time stuff. C can't stay because well... her roommate is being penetrated to put it lightly. So I offer A's bed to sleep in for the night and she gladly accepts.
When we get to the dorm room I show her A's bed and say "you can sleep here tonight." I go to the communal bathroom to take out contacts and brush, but when I get back C is laying in my bed on her side (I think it was supposed to be sexy, but I am only attracted to other humans, not whales.) I just shrug and get into A's bed and roll over so i don't have to see her. After about 5 minutes or so I was almost asleep she starts to crawl into the bed i'm in. i freak out and tell that I have a girlfriend and she says and I quote "She doesn't have to find out" I freakout and somehow manage to get over her and get out of bed. When I stand upright after falling to the ground she pushes me. hard. I drunkenly stumble and hit my head on a pile of books and start bleeding. She pushed me against the floor and stradles me i kept telling her to get off and that I didn't want but, she unzips my pants and forces me inside of her. That was the worst part honestly. I was able to get an erection even though I was completely unwilling. I don't remember much after that really I don't know if I just chose not to remember it or if My brain just repressed it. I woke up the next morning with my head in A's lap and a bandage around my head. But the worst feeling was my tailbone ( I later found out it was broken). A was freaking out asking what happened and I told him the entire story. By the end both of us were hugging and crying and he kept on saying it was his fault because he made me stay to wingman B with him and I told him "No, its my fault I led her on" A then looked me in the eye and said "No, It is 100% not your fault you never did anything to deserve this." and I said "yeah, I know" but to be completely honest I didn't believe myself. The following I days were the worst days in my life, I had to finish out the semester, I couldn't tell my girlfriend because I wanted to tell her in person (She was in highschool still), and the the only person i could talk to Was A and I felt like i couldn't talk to B because I had no idea what she knew or felt.
It was a tinder date, well not much of a date, it was straight to my place for netflix. When I saw her walking to my door it was already obvious i was catfished and she looked nothing like her pictures (100pounds heavier). Since I already screwed this all up i decided to just play it cool and friend zone to hell.
She brought alcohol for some reason and i thought it'd be rude not to drink once she asked me. It was beer in closed bottles so i felt it was safe.
I went to the washroom about 20 minutes after her arrival and came back and was finishing my second beer when i started feeling paralyzed/tired. I didn't know what was going on and i knew it wasn't right.
She pretended like she was getting worried so i played it off cool because i thought i might have just been getting sick. I never fell asleep, i just couldn't move my body. At this point in time she stripped my naked and forced herself all over me for the entire night while i stared at the ceiling scared. She kept screaming "do you think i'm pretty?!" "Do you think mommy is pretty!?" I was able to move again around 9 in the morning and just told her to leave because i had to go to work. She got aggressive when i asked so i pretended to phone the police and she left faster than she came in.
I never saw her again, and deleted tinder.
When i was 16 ,i went to my friends house,we were going to smoke weed for the first time and I had got it from a neighbour of mine.When we were rolling the first joint in his room his mother walked in and freaked out,she threw all the weed down the toilet and quizzed us on how we got it,my friend told her it was all my idea and i had brought it here with me,which was true,she told my friend to stay in his room and he was grounded for 3 months,and dragged me into her car in a fit of rage,she was going to take me home and tell my parents.
My dad is a police officer and both my mom and dad are very anti drugs and religious.I was crying on the way home while my friends mom was shouting at me saying she's gonna tell my parents and tell all the other parents in our community and nobody will want to hang around with me...I was begging her to not tell my parents and that i would never do it again.
She stopped the car in an alley where nobody was around.While i was crying started touching me threw my shorts and said "you think your the cool kid around here huh?" and proceeded to touch me until i got hard,i was still crying tho and she got on top of me and raped me in the front seat of her car.She then said if i told anybody she would tell everybody I'm a pot head and just made this up.She never told my parents about the weed and this is the first time iv ever told anybody,I never really spoke to that guy again I'm guessing his mom told him he isn't allowed to hang around with me but i never want to see anybody in that family again
I lost my virginity at 16 to my older sister's friend. Apparently her Shitty group of friends had made a bet on who could corrupt her little brother.
I get a call one night to come party with a friend of hers I had always had a crush on, so of course I jump at the opportunity. I get to her house (I had gotten my drivers license maybe 2 weeks prior), and knock on the door. She answers but no one else is in her house. HOLY SHIT I am totally about to hook up with my sister's friend.
She hands me a bottle of 'water' that was just straight vodka, we sit down in the living room and start drinking. This was the second time I had ever drank so I got really drunk, really fast. I have always assumed nothing else was involved, but who knows. I said I needed to stop and she began goading me, saying things like "don't be a fucking pussy", "look, mine is almost gone, I must have a bigger dick than you", and so on. I downed the bottle eventually.
Next thing I know, I woke up the next morning, knowing I had had sex but not remembering a second of it. I was sticky and even though I had never done it before I just... Knew. She was still asleep and I was really thirsty. I reached over her to grab the half full water bottle she'd been drinking out of all night, too hungover to think it might be vodka. Then, to my immediate surprise, it wasn't vodka. It was water. I smelled her water bottle, smelled mine, and searched to make sure she hadn't just gotten a new bottle. Nope. She had been drinking water all night so she could win the 'bet'. A bet I was told about a couple weeks later while my sister's friends laughed as if it was some great joke.
Everyone I told just laughed and congratulated me on hooking up with my sister's hot friend. The only person who gave a shit was my sister when she found out, and she immediately punched her friend in the face.
I was about 4 years old. I was playing at an older girl's house, she might have been 8. We were in her bedroom, I think I was looking at her toys or something. She wanted me to take my clothes off and then she used a soup spoon like it was some doctor's instrument to "examine" me. Her friend was there and she seemed really uneasy and told the girl to stop. I put my clothes back on, went home and told my parents. They freaked out and stormed over to yell at her parents. I just thought it was a little weird. Later I realized that she was probably being molested by her dad.
During the summer between 5th and 6th grade, the two most popular and attractive girls called me on my parents landline when no one was home.
I'd been teased the whole last year for being fat (I wasn't, just a little chubby but since I was the new kid...).
I'd never had any sexual encounters before this phone call, but they spent a good 15 minutes using cruel, humiliating words and phrases while breathing heavily and using husky sexualized (think classic phone sex) voices.
Things like, "Oh blub blub (my humiliating school nickname), you're sooo fat, I just love your fat rolls. It's so easy to make fun of you because you're so worthless and fat, blub blub...mmmm." And so on. It was my first exposure to sexuality from a girl (or anyone), which of course turned me on so much, and it set the course for the next 20+ years of my intimate interactions with girls (and guys).
I was always the nicest and most innocent boy, and after this I just felt compelled towards being sexually submissive, craving humiliation and degradation of the worst kind, from men and woman. And to this day I still am struggling to break those chains and learn what actual love making and true intimacy (not medicating kinky sex) is all about.
That day changed the course of my life and worked to define such a huge part of me, and I so desperately wish it hadn't happen. Just typing this all out has me shaking.
I was raped in college. I played rugby and volleyball and was a big strong guy. I was saving myself for marriage at the time and my gf didn't understand why I would sleep with her. She told all her friends about it and concluded (later on I found this) that I must be gay...because if I didn't want to sleep with her then it HAD to be because I was gay right?
One night in my dorm room we were naked hooking up. I was rock hard laying there eyes closed and I feel her quickly sit on me and go all the way down on my cock. I opened my eyes really quickly and she looked into my eyes and said "now you aren't a virgin anymore..how about that" I threw her off me...she must of traveled 15 feet I was enraged. She got up started crying and I started screaming...she put on her clothes and ran out.
She wrote me a letter a day later apologizing profusely and I broke up with her..for the next 15 years I didn't understand why I could never get close to a woman in a relationship...I would date for 6 months or more and when it began to get really serious I would break it off..through 2 years of therapy I realized that this happened in college (i guess I blocked it out) and started bawling in the session..like dry heaving crying...the next girl I dated I married and I have a wonderfully satisfying sex life now.
But that one incident apparently scarred me for a long long time. I hope one day I run into that bitch so we can have a chat.
I was in an LTR that ended violently. Long story short, I glance over one night and see her on her phone having an inappropriate conversation with another man. I ignore it, trying to convince myself I saw wrong. Later that evening we get into an argument and I confront her about what I saw. I grabbed her phone, she grabbed.... something and I ended up getting hit so hard most of the night is blacked out in my memory. So much blood. The relationship didn't last long after that for obvious reasons.
This was years ago and I've only just got over what happened enough to start seriously dating again. I asked a long term aquaintince out a few weeks back and was soundly rejected. Ok, no problem, moved on and met someone great. Aquaintince and I are talking last night and I made the mistake of asking why she rejected me. Turns out having been in an abusive relationship is a turn off for her. I know its petty but I've not felt so broken since that night all those years ago. I felt like damaged goods. Hell of a feeling. I can't help feeling if the gender roles were reversed that she would see me as a victim, instead I'm just seen as weak instead.
Oh well, to hell with her. I won't be defined by the shitty actions of other people. I'm dating someone awesome now so it's all for the best anyway. Still, it stings just a bit, you know?
I was at a party, and was drunk and high, so I decided to call it a night and go to sleep in my buddy's room (he okayed it). Well, I woke up to the sensation of someone removing my pants, then blacked out again Came to again, and this larger girl whom I had met earlier in the night was sucking on my penis. I told her to get off of me, and she told me that I liked it, because I was getting hard. I blacked out again, and woke up because she was riding me I couldn't move, and I couldn't push her off, though I tried I kept telling her to stop, but she kept going. After about 5 minutes of me saying no and telling her to get off and trying to push her off of me, I blacked out again. When I woke up in the morning, I thought it was just a bad dream till I found the condom still on me (thank god she used one). That's how I lost my virginity And it kind of fucked me up a bit, because I had planned to lose it to someone I loved, and it just got taken I lost respect for sex and fucked around a lot. My girlfriend has really helped me get over it though, and although I still occasionally recall it vividly, I'm mostly fine.
My girlfriend at the time drugged my drink (we were around 14 at the time) and I woke up to her on top of me. I was too weak to do anything and she had her way. I never really told anyone, and from my interpretation of the laws in Idaho, it doesn't legally count as rape.
I'm 28 now and I was sexually assaulted by my emotionally and physically abusive freshman girlfriend whom I was deeply in love with. I had been her secret boyfriend for ~6mo because she was hard of hearing at a prominent mainstreamed university and she "didn't want my dear friends to see me differently because I'm dating a hearing guy". I had 10" and 120lb on her along with her transplanted kidney that rested just under the skin.
We were messing around as she had never been in the mood to go further than grinding all clothes on with no hand touching allowed by me. I was really frustrated after weeks of this and I removed my consent and told her "Stop, I don't want to do this anymore. And I have to get ready for class." She kept going. I said stop again. I started to move my hips when she shifted her weight to pin them down and started yelling at me. That I'm not a man, I wanted to be with her and now I clearly don't love her, that it's my duty to please her. I told her to stop that I wanted to leave. She kept going and I kept struggling when she looked me in the eye and said "you say you love me and you're trying to get away. If you were a man and didn't want this you'd push me off you. But I know you won't hurt me. Now shut up!"
I realized I could not get her off me without risking her serious internal damage. I realized if I hurt her she could say I assaulted her and no one would believe me. She could accuse me of raping and stalking her and get everyone's support and end my life. My love for her, my humanity, my desire to give her a better life had become the bonds that kept me there. I was... powerless.
I stared at the underside of the bunk bed above. I shut down I didn't know what else to do. I laid there praying it would stop soon, that she'd get bored, that my erection would go away. I denied what was going on... I wanted to be her sexual partner so it's OK right? This is what men are supposed to do. She eventually left and I was late to class.
A year later after ending the relationship a few months after that incident I entered counseling at my university. I spent at least a month steeling myself to talk about it. Slowly I started talking about her, the fucked up things she said, the even more fucked up things she signed sitting next to me thinking I didn't understand, the way she would beat on me full force while all our friends laughed. Then I finally talked about it, tentatively, not sure what to call it (molestation? Rape? Assault?).
My male counselor with several years experience smirked the whole way as I talked then laughed at me. A short but definitive "haha good joke" laugh as he shook his head, composed himself, then asked me how I felt about my father.
It took 7 years but I started counseling again and waited a year and a half of weekly sessions before talking about it. Now, a decade later, I'm starting to really heal and accept that I was sexually assaulted. It's complicated by my desires to be a male submissive that got shut down hard after the assault and the two intermixed ruining relationship after relationship.
A few weeks back I wrote about my feelings of how society treats male survivors and started a support group on Fetlife. I feel like I cannot be the only guy who was sexually assaulted or a victim of IPV and stayed because of misunderstood submissive/masochistic desires. You can find the group searching for male survivors or find me as Sparklefarts on Fet.
Without any details, it was a friend, and there were no hard feelings. I didn't really care that much, and I honestly think she didn't understand what she was doing was wrong. Bringing it up to her would've only hurt her already shaky confidence and self-esteem, and wouldn't have helped me at all. I just couldn't do that to her so I never told her that it was rape.
I was at a bar I know the owner of with my best bud, and this happens while we are sitting on stools at the bar:
We are watching the Reds game and bullshitting with the bar owner and his wife who are behind the bar. Pretty good friends of ours.
Out of nowhere, this woman comes up behind me, slides her hand one hand to my groin and the other onto my chest and then licks/bites my ear. I know 100% it's not my fiancĂŠe because she is at her friends house for girls night. So I go "What the fuck?!" while getting up and turning around, thinking this is a case of mistaken identity.
Nope, she just looks at me and goes "what you don't like that, you gay or something?"
Before I can even think of a response, the bar owners wife had apparently seen this go down and the WTF look on my buddy's face. She comes out from behind the bar yelling at her like the world's most pissed off mom: "Get the fuck away from my customers, get out, before I use your fucking head to open the door!" RandomMolesterLady runs out, we get sympathy beers from owner. Pretty much end of story.
Never told my fiancĂŠe about it, really didn't have that big of affect on me, but it always bothers me now when people go "only women get groped/molested/raped". It's not a gender specific issue.
I had a few different situations where I have been sexually assaulted by women over the course of my life. I'm prefacing these incidents with some facts about myself. I have never been really confident with the way I look or carry myself. I've always been a bit overweight and started losing my hair in highschool. I got teased relentlessly for it.
The first time anything like that happened was when I was a sophomore in high school. I was late for class and making my way to class, in a rush. I was really late because the halls were empty. I was exiting the stairwell and as I was making my way down the hallway three girls who were seniors. (I found them attractive. I don't know how much that applies to the story.) The one in the middle of the group, a blonde girl with short hair, grabbed my nipple and twisted it while the other girls laughed. I was pretty suprised and didn't say anything. The girls all laughed and just kept laughing as they walked away. I was pretty confused, someone that I would never have the guts to even talk to did this. I didn't tell anyone else about it since I didn't think anyone would take me seriously.
The second time was the first time I went to a concert. I was around 17 and enjoying myself. A woman, fat and middle aged, tapped me on the shoulder. She asked me to let her through. I obliged, and she, instead of making her way through the crowd just stood in the spot I was standing in. I tapped on her shoulder and flipped her off. She responded by reaching back and grabbing me by the balls. I pushed her hand away and that is where things pretty much ended, I moved and found a new place to watch.
The last time something happened, I was in my early 20's. I had been invited to a party that one of my friend's coworkers were throwing. I used to drink a lot at that age. I was going to the fridge to grab some of the beer I brought. There were three middle aged women in the kitchen. They stopped me and started talking to me. They had a bottle of liquor, they bet me that I couldn't drink the entire thing myself. Being stupid I took them up on the challenge.
I had drank most of the bottle as they cheered me on and was unable to really stand up on my own at this point. That's when they started grabbing at my crotch, unzipping my pants and pulling my cock out. I said no repeatedly but I was too drunk to really do anything about it. They all took turns stroking it and several sucked it. I had really bad whiskey dick so things didn't really advance past that point. I don't remember much of the night but my friend saw what was happening. He didn't help. He just made fun of me afterwards. The next day it really burnt when I peed and there were tooth scrape marks on my dick. I went to the doctor to get tested. Thankfully I didn't have anything and it was just burning from the fact that one of them had vomited on my dick when it was in their mouth.
My friend thought this was hilarious and started making jokes about it over dinner at my parent's house. I stopped talking to him after that and since I was the only reason my other friends put up with him, they stopped talking to him too.
I don't drink anymore and I think it messed with me quite a bit mentally. It changed what I am into sexually, now I am heavily into things like femdom and reverse rape scenes. When I think about these things, I just feel guilty and resentful, like I could have done more to prevent it.
An ex gf cornered me in a room when I was drunk. Started grabbing my junk. I started repeating please stop. Please stop. Please stop. She had a skirt on....She pulled it out and pulled it barely into her vagina for a second and I pushed her away and she tripped and fell over a table a few feet away. All I said was, I was saying please stop. Then she awkwardly left the room.
Maybe it isn't rape because I had the power to do that earlier.... I dunno.
When I was twelve I caught some girls (they were a grade up) in the yard during recess hugging one of my close friends. I went to go and see if he wanted to play some soccer, and as I got close I noticed they had their hands down his pants, and he looked super uncomfortable. As I went to break it up another of the gaggle of girls turned around and grabbed my junk, fondling me - so I hit her. Immature? Sure. I then went to the VP on the field to tell her what happened and she ushered me to her office wherein I was then suspended for hitting another student. The issue didn't get resolved until I told my mother and she went to the principals office. I felt horrible for hitting the girl, but what was I supposed to do? The vice principal immediately assuming I was just a violent liar made it worse. Fortunately the head principal was a bit more levelheaded and believed my story, especially after my friend came forward as well.
I was at a frosh event and it was called the 5am'er. Basically, you get up at 5am and get drunk with people in the bush. It's almost a school ritual. I had one too many beers and for the first time in my life got blackout drunk. I vaguely remember puking and some girl whom I don't even know was there trying to kiss me. She was tipsy but not nearly as drunk as I was. My friend walks me home and she decides to walk with. He drops me off and she says that shell make sure I get to my bed okay. My friend says nothing.
At this point I'm still blackout drunk. I vaguely remember her holding me down and her saying that she was my girlfriend. Me being plastered out of my mind I said nothing. I woke up and she was just leaving. I had no idea what her name was or who she was, but I woke up with deep scratches on my shoulders, neck, and back. Scratches as in they had drawn blood and had scabbed. I felt very weird and very ashamed of feeling violated. It just felt wrong. Afterwards she never contacted me again. I didn't even telly girlfriend this because it's embarrassing, but I guess if she does read this, I'm sorry for not telling you. It feels very uncomfortable for me to talk about it and through text is the only way I can really talk about it. Please understand. I love you.
When I was 12 I hung out with a girl that I considered a friend (I'm gay and knew back then). As I was laying on her bed texting or something she would sometimes jump on me and start dry humping my crotch and face. She made it seem like a joke and was laughing hard but I tried to push her off and told her to stop but after minutes of failing I just kind of let it happen. It was especially awkward when her friends were in the room. I distinctively remember one guy saying "Man usually it's the woman who gets raped not the man ahahaah". They eventually just left the room.
Also, in highschool my german teacher gave me a soft slap on the ass in front of the class. Same schoolyear, my english teacher did the same thing to me in the hallway. General reaction was laughter (including myself). Not nearly as bad as other stories here but a few years later I started realizing that reactions would have been different if genders were swapped.
I dated an incredibly manipulative and psychotic girl in my late teens. We started dating right after high school and for the first 6 months everything was great but looking back there were some red flags that I should have noticed.
Basically it all went downhill when she took my phone one day and read my texts. I had a completely innocent 2 text conversation with an ex and my girlfriend went insane. Stormed out of my house and disappeared for 12 hours and freaked her parents and me out. I was sleeping that night and heard a banging on my window, I opened it and she preceded to rip out my screen and start clawing viciously at me. 3 years later I still have scars up my arm.
I stayed with her for another year an a half after that because like I said she was completely manipulative and would always threaten self harm. being in my late teens/early 20's I convinced myself I could "save" her. Put up with her regularly punching, biting, and just all around physical abuse that was mostly brought up because I had been with other girls before I knew her(why she freaked when she saw I texted an ex). I have a lot of stories of Shit I put up with but just for the record I NEVER put my hands on her even if she did deserve retaliation.
Finally I wised up about a year ago and cut it off completely. Still have trust issues and I doubt I'll date anytime soon.
I was out at the bar with some friends when this girl showed up. Her and I had fooled around before but had a big falling out because she wanted me to be her babies daddy and start helping out with her bills and everything (we weren't dating, just fooled around twice).
It was my friends birthday so we were going pretty hard at the bar. I was keeping my distance from this girl though. At the end of the night we were all going our separate ways when she came up to me and noticed I was barely able to walk. She said she would help me get home and it would give us some time to talk. I was reluctant, but gave in when I stumbled and nearly fell in the street.
We started walking towards home, when she started groping me and kissing my neck. I asked her to stop and even pushed her away but then fell over. She came back, said she was sorry and she will take me right home. We were almost there(3ish blocks away) when she turned me a bit and pushed me down into the weeds. At this point I'm passing in and out so I only have pictures of what happened in my head. I remember not being able to breathe because she was sitting on my face. Then my pants were off and she was on top of me. And the part that makes me sick/sad just thinking about it was I hard while it was happening. I know it's not a conscious thing especially in my state of mind but still.
Anyways, I remember her rolling me on top of her and me doing maybe 1 or 2 pumps when I had one of those sobering moments when you're drunk. I backed up, pulled my pants up and just stumbled the rest of the way home. She followed me trying to get into my house and telling me that I liked it. I felt so terrible.
Then I came to reddit to ask them if I had been raped. I mean I did get on top for a moment. I received so many negative posts saying I just had drunk sex and people were berating me. I didn't know what to think. I told a friend what happened and she asked me if I wanted to have sex with her that night. I of course said no and had been stopping her all night until I literally couldn't. And that's when it settled in. I was a grown man and I was raped.
He asked me why I didn't go to the cops. And as much as I hate her, she has a son who she is really good to. And even if the cops were to take me serious and be on my side 100%, it would ruin his life. And I don't want that. So I carry it on my shoulders. If I'm at the bar and she comes in, I leave. I also don't drink as much or as hard anymore. Male rape exists and the victims are made out to be near criminal or humiliated into feeling bad about it.
First, I was 13, she was 26. I was baby-sitting her kids. She came back from the bar, having struck out, pissed off and horny.
I felt like I got lucky, but if that'd been a 26yr old guy with my 13yr old daughter, I would feel different.
Then, I was probably 22, went to a party, a friend I hadn't seen in a while was getting frisky ... I blacked out, and passed out on a table. I vaguely remember feeling hands on me ... she was rubbing my chest and started pulling at my pants. I was in that barely conscious of what's going on, and just wanting to sleep, mode of being really, really, drunk.
I told her 'no, no ... I'm way too drunk ... ', she said 'Well, not ALL of you', pulling me out. I said 'no' a bunch more, tried to roll away from her, I was probably too drunk to stand, and certainly too drunk to fight. She just ignored everything I said, climbed on top, held my arms, and did her thing.
The next morning I honestly wasn't sure it'd happened for a few minutes. I had to find my glasses and throw up. While I was in the bathroom, I noticed my pants were still undone ... and I was sticky.
I pulled her aside, and did the 'what the fuck?!' conversation, and she just said 'Yeah, sorry, I was really drunk'. We had a quick 'If you have herpes or get pregnant, I'm going to be pissed' conversation, and she sort of laughed nervously and re-assured me that wasn't a problem.
That was it. Nothing happened.
I was raped by my older sister, she is 12 yrs older than me I was about 10-12 yrs old.i was the youngest of 7kids, 4girls and three boys, she was about to graduate highschool
It would happen whenever we were alone together she was the second oldest and was pretty much my guardian because my mother was always at work. When I was a kid it was all confusing to me.I had younger cousins and a niece that was you her than me and I would try to have sex with them after the experience with my sister. I did succeed a few times not realizing it was wrong I didn't rape them I would try to seduce them into having sex,oral sex to.When I became a teenager I realized it was wrong for me and my sister to do the things we did, I wanted to apologize to my cousins and niece but never got the strength to,and I eventually blocked it out of my mind because everything seemed normal family wise.As an adult it still eats me up inside I can still smell the mood of the occasion and it makes me ill. I never apologized to my niece or anyone and I figured I deserve anything bad that happens to me because of it. I found out later that my sister was often called a virgin and lesbian in school so I figured she was just using me as a test dummy so to speak. My niece use to be skinny as a kid as we got older she became obese and I tend to blame that on me too.
A couple years ago I was in a relationship that ended up being full of verbal and emotional abuse. From time not too long before the relationship and all throughout it I was struggling with my sexuality (or lack thereof). My ex had problems herself with confidence and depression.
Basically I fit into the asexual scale and I don't enjoy intercourse at all. My ex didn't understand this too well and to her it was a sign that she was undesirable. She also had a normal sex drive and was pretty selfish about it. This resulted in her pressuring me for sex and if I couldn't keep it up she would basically mock me for it. Despite me clearly saying so, she never understood that they way she handled my shortcomings in bed was making my performance worse by piling anxiety on top of it. This all culminated to one night where we were fooling around in bed (I can do foreplay type stuff with ease, so this was common for us). She was going down on me and got on top of me to ride me. I struggled to get her off, but she locked my arms in a way that gave her an advantage over being able to shift my weight and forced me into her. I've never considered this a rape, but more of a sexual assault (maybe it is though, I've never told anyone this to get outside perspective).
I haven't been able to have a relationship since because I feel like no one will understand the true nature of asexuality and react similar to how she did. If I start getting close to someone I usually just distance myself until we stop talking completely.
When I was around the age of 5/6, my mother continuously took me to home daycare during Summer as she and my father worked. I remember hating one of my daycare providers because she treated me poorly, and molested me several times, the time I most remember was during a water fight with the other kids (who also mistreated me) she grabbed me and took me to the bathroom to "change," she then aggressively molested me, it was painful because of how she was handling it. My parents recently found out after I was put in the mental hospital for 3 days and had to admit this happened to me at a young age.
A few months ago I went to a friends party and we were all drinking. While there my neighbors step-daughter (she doesn't live at my neighbors house except for every other weekend) shows up. I blacked out around 12/1230 after repeatedly telling her that I did not want to go upstairs to "talk" by ourselves. But when the morning comes around my friend who hosted the party tells me that around 1 in the morning she followed my upstairs to the bathroom and about 20 minutes later we walked down the stairs holding hands and she was kissing me occasionally after that infront of others on the first floor. I confronted her the next day about it and she says that nothing happened but the fact that there are multiple eyewitnesses to us acting differently after we dissappeared and her bragging about it to her friends makes me think otherwise. I don't feel any mental or physical pain as a result of this but it still makes me more conscious of how I treat other people when drunk and how even if they give consent when drunk it doesn't mean it is okay.
I just recently told my mother and father that my aunt had molested me as a small child. I told one of my closest friends about it as a way to try to feel better. He told me, "thats not that big a deal."
Its not that big a deal? I have lived my entire life in agony and depression because of this. And I'm going to be told its not a big deal?
There is a woman in my group of friends who has always aggressively flirted with me. She is cool and all but I would never go for her. Anyway, one night I got blacked out and was hanging out with her and some other people at her house. I passed out in her bed and woke up with her going down on me. I woke up the next morning and left right away. When it came up later, she told me we just made out and also told mutual friends that. She works in a crisis-related field and I think she knows what she did wasn't cool and that if the roles were reversed it would be a bigger deal.
I don't feel that I was assaulted or violated, but I was very unhappy that it happened and I thought it was telling that she tried to cover up what really happened.
I was molested twice by two girls when i was six or seven. My mum worked full time so she could support me and my siblings because my father was a drunk and a junkieso she would regularly drop us of at her friends house and her daughter and ugly friend who were both around 17 i think (not too sure) would often lure me away from my siblings so they could do things to me. After almost two years i mustered up some courage and told both my mother and hers and when they were both confronted they denied it, called me a liar, began to cry and even made-up alibis for eachother, so my mother beat me with abelt for lying. it happened again wih a grown woman later on too but i told my oldest brother and he whacked her round the head with a pipe. when i tell people these stories their response is always a variation of "lucky bastard" oror something like that but I don't feel at all "lucky" or happy that it happened, honestly whenever i think back to those moments i feel melancholic.
When I was in college I found out that a girl I knew came into my room when I was really drunk and passed out and tried to have sex with me.
I found out through my girlfriend at the time, when were having an argument because she found out a close friend of mine and I had sex one time and I never told her about it. She then started asking about other girls I hooked up with that we hung out with and I told her that she was the only one. Thatâs when she said, âDonât lie to me, what about ____?â I seriously had no idea what she was talking about and then she told me the story.
She heard about before we started dating, because they were friends. Apparently, one day the two of them and another friend were on a porch swing that was in the middle of our quad. They saw me walking to the cafeteria and my girlfriend made a comment about how she thought I was attractive. Thatâs when the other girl started almost bragging about when she went to my room to hook up with me in my room and she started giving me a blowjob, but left because she couldnât get me to stay hard (like I said I was really drunk).
The way she told it made it seem like I wanted it and just had âwhiskey dick,â but the truth is that I have no memory of this happening and would have never wanted to have sex with her. I did not find this girl attractive at all; in fact I thought she was annoying because she was one of those people that always tries to one up you, which is why I think she even told her the story.
I was really shocked to hear that had happened and did feel kind of violated. I explained to my girlfriend what had really happened and she was really great about. Her freshman year some guy tried to force himself on her and she only got away because she was with another friend of hers, who heard her yelling for him to stop. She reported it to security, but the only thing they did was make it that he wasn't allowed in her dorms and she wasn't allowed at the campus housing he was at. I never reported what happened, because I didn't think they would believe me or even do much about it because I was a guy. I had never heard of a case of a girl sexually assaulting a guy on campus, which I now realize could be because no one spoke out for the same reasons.
Back in college, I came home blackout drunk and supposedly passed out in my walk-in closet. Some housemates found me and walked me to my bed. Then they goaded this girl (who was into me, but whom I, for what it's worth, disdained and was not attracted to) into climbing into bed and fondling me for a while.
Found out about it the next morning when they told me about it like it was a joke. Felt weird and violated and just kinda let it go, even though I know it would've been a reportable offense were the sexes reversed.
Was constantly beaten by my mother from when I was 7 (after my 2nd sister's birth) until I was 16. My mother treated me as if I was beneath the women of my family and my sisters, even though I'm the oldest and her only son. I went to live with my grandmother and have been on my own for a few years after I graduated college.
Last time I spoke with my mother was basically her disowning me because I didn't like the guy she married. She tells my family that I said that I hate her and don't want to talk to her again (which is true) and that I wouldn't go to said sister's high school graduation because of that (which isn't true, I was never sent an invitation).
I have more but this is all I could handle posting right now.