One Broke Witch

originally published here: https://medium.com/@Vi163/my-journey-from-christianity-to-paganism-d99d6475d225#.nlw9gyhod

My mother was Greek Orthodox and my father was Methodist. However, growing up, we went to my mother’s church regularly until I was a young teenager. My parents said we were just too busy to go to church anymore. At this point, however, we lived in an area where the church we typically went to was a little over an hour drive away from us, which takes its toll on both the people (getting up in the morning, going to a place full of strangers, etc), and the car (maintenance, gas money, etc).

Growing up, I attended a Christian summer sports camp, I went on a few religious retreats, attended Sunday school, and was involved with small youth groups/clubs that were related to the church that we attended. My mother attended a regular Bible study (still does I believe?) and both of my parents had a rather strict, “old world” view of the Bible. They are both in their 60s, so it is very likely also a product of their generation’s culture, having a heavy emphasis on religion.

I began growing anxious about my faith when I was around ten years old. I was told by a preacher “Christians should never marry people who don’t also identify as Christian”. This struck me as odd and rubbed me the wrong way. How could Christians continue to spread their faith, if they only married other Christians? It just didn’t make a lick of sense to me.

Fast-forward to when I was around fourteen. The more I learned and was exposed to modern day Christians, the more anxious I became. Every time I went to church with my family, I had a striking feeling of “I do not belong here”. The church I attended was very similar to Gothic cathedrals with tall ceilings, and beautiful stained glass windows resembling Biblical stories (and/or Christian saints). However, I felt like a fish out of water. Despite the church’s beauty, I just couldn’t stand being in such a cold, man-made, isolated area.

I couldn’t stand the cherry picking of the Bible, particularly in Leviticus. One part of Leviticus says “Man shall not lay with another man” (which has been grossly misinterpreted over the years), however, a few verses later, it says something along the lines of “If a woman has multiple sex partners, we as a society have the morale right to burn her at the stake”. Don’t believe me? Look up Leviticus chapter 21, verse 9.

I tried asking my mother about the contradictions within the Bible, since I knew she attended Bible study regularly. She told me “It is just apart of the Old Testament, it doesn’t really matter now”, and when I tried to ask her about the famous anti-gay line in Leviticus (leaving out the fact that it has been grossly misinterpreted), she seemed stumped (we went in verbal circles here). This was very frustrating, being the curious beaver that I am.

There were also stories of people claiming to be “Christians”, but then doing the most anti-Christian things out there (seriously, how do you go to bed feeling good, knowing you screamed at a six year old at a PRIDE parade?). I just could not stand the hypocrisy (and blunt sexism) anymore. What put the final nail in the coffin for me was somehow my Dad and I got on the subject of marriage/serious dating and me looked at me and said “You belong to me until you’re married. No one else owns you until you are married”. It wasn’t a gentle “you’re my little girl” type voice or gesture. Nope, it was a very serious “you are my property” type vibe, and it freaked me the fuck out.

I believe I was around sixteen or seventeen when I began to tentatively dip my toes into looking up information about other religions. I asked some groups on Facebook I was apart of at the time for some help. At first, I was very attracted to the Native American belief system (specifically the Seven Drums spirituality). However, as I looked more into things, I ended up stumbling on Paganism. It was like a light bulb went off in my head. I found my home.

I immediately joined as many Pagan groups as I could find, eager to learn. I loved how open and “laid-back” the overall attitude was. There was no strict “you must worship this” (or anything of the sort). Was there the occasional jerk in different groups? Yep, but the groups felt very accepting and loving. I loved learning about the different deities and pantheons that different Pagans worshipped. I loved learning about how some individuals incorporated their own version of Witchcraft. There was not some invisible almighty figure that would cast you down to eternal suffering, just because you didn’t agree with the “laws” of the religion. It felt like a breath of fresh air.

I once read a quote that read along the lines of “If doing something, say engaging in sex before your married, gives you high levels of anxiety, because it disagrees with your religion, it might be time to change your belief systems”, and it was like a light bulb went off in my head. I really wish other individuals would take this to heart.

“My mother was Greek Orthodox and my father was Methodist. However, growing up, we went to my mother’s church regularly until I was a young teenager. My parents said we were just too busy to go to church anymore. At this point, however, we lived in an area where the church we typically went to was a little over an hour drive away from us, which takes its toll on both the people (getting up in the morning, going to a place full of strangers, etc), and the car (maintenance, gas money, etc).”

Just in this very short section at the beginning of the story her parents are in severe disobedience of the Bible. By the end of the story we see the result.

First - Greek Orthodox and Methodist are about as far apart as you can get on the Christian spectrum. If (and a big if) they were equally yoked one should have forsaken the one church for the other. As Paul wrote - “Now I plead with you, brethren, by the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that you all speak the same thing, and that there be no divisions among you, but that you be perfectly joined together in the same mind and in the same judgment” (I Corinthians 1:10). This couple should have taken their Christian faith more seriously and come together in harmony on the scripture meaning and application. One should have given up the Greek or the Methodist for sure.

If they were serious in their faith one would have converted before they got married.

Second, they violated biblical teaching when they stopped going to Church. Hebrews 10:24&25 - And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching.

As parents, especially when you are responsible for the spiritual well being of your household should go to church every Sunday and other days as appropriate. As the verse says to spur one another on. Which brings me to my third point.

Third, why belong to a church over an hour away. This is a huge mistake that I see all they time. When people drive that far to church they are saying that the church does not need them as vital members and they truly do not want a close relationship with the body of Christ (church). The distance is often used as a ready excuse for not volunteering, helping out with youth programs, praying with people, holding their hands, worshiping together, sharing stories of growth and failures. These are crucial to being a Christian.

A member of a church should never be a stranger because we are called to be intimate parts of each others lives. There are dozens of verses that contain the words, “one another” that applies to the church. Without being a member of a local church and a closeness with other Christians you may not be a Christian at all. It is awfully easy to show up once a month or so, sit in back and high tail it out of the service but we are commanded to more. No wonder her mom could not answer rudimentary questions about the Bible in a coherent way.

Based on the limited knowledge that we have, more than likely, this young woman was not raised in Christian household at all. Truly sad because now she has a warped view of what the Christian faith is.

I will close with this verse and a prayer that she find her way back to the faith. And also a prayer that her parents find true faith and seek forgiveness and repent for their actions.  

Mark 9:42  "If anyone causes one of these little ones–those who believe in me–to stumble, it would be better for them if a large millstone were hung around their neck and they were thrown into the sea.

*Cracks knuckles* Hello there, rsseemfam. My name is Vi. Paganaturewitch is my side blog, where I post all my Pagan related stuff. It appears that you have taken something and ran rampant with it. Allow me to do my thing me.

1) My mother and father met on a blind date and were long distance for quite awhile before settling in with each other and eventually getting married. That’s the short-sweet version of it. Their in-laws (my grandparents on both sides) were friendly with each other, despite the drastic differences in religions (DESPITE STILL BOTH BEING CHRISTIAN). My mother, as stated, was pretty strict “To the books” with the Bible. My father was seemingly more lenient with it (he still proudly said he was Christian, but he didn’t attend Bible study regularly like my mother did-and still does-). Both have their own flavor of Christanity, so to say. Christanity, like many other faiths, has MANY sub-communities (in this case, denominations), and is a wide spectrum. Some groups teach absolute peace and understanding (”love the sinner not the saint” type stuff, others say make peace with each other, truly “love your neighbor like thyself” stuff). Other groups are VERY xenophobic/transphobic/homophobic and adamantly preach “death to homosexuality” (whether explicitly or not). While in attendance to the Greek Orthodox church (since that was the church my parents and I regularly did until I was about 14 or so) I NEVER heard them mention transgender individuals, homosexual individuals, etc. I guess the man preaching at the time best thought “out of mind, out of sight” I suppose. I don’t know, I’m not then. The closest thing we have ever was a man named Father Nick who was ADAMANT about peace and love, no matter who it was. He was young, only in his late 20s, possibly early 30s.

Yes, I was raised in a very Christian home. We prayed, my mother could often be found reading her Bible in the evening. My father, as I said, was not as open with his faith. My mother told me she prayed a lot, even if we didn’t see her do it (often silent prayers to herself) type deal. 

2) While I do agree with you that driving a little over an hour for church is a bit on the far end side, let’s be real here. Greek Orthodoxy (and any variation of it, such as Russian) is a RARITY in the States. The most common form of faith, by far is the Protestant faith. By far, we would have had a much easier time finding a church of my father’s denomination (Methodist). However, my father respected my mother’s wishing in finding a Greek Orthodox church, because he knew it made her spirituality at peace and happy. Is she supposed to suddenly change denominations due to the rarity of her church? Her Bible study is a group mixed of different denominations (Methodist, Orthodoxy, Catholic, basically all Christian denominations under the sun), but she really wanted an Orthodoxy church to go to. Which is totally understandable and believable. For myself, I would LOVE to practice Paganism in a coven, but the Pagans in my location is very secretive (for good reasons too, since I live in the Deep South Bible Belt). You do what you can to be happy in this regard. My mother and father are both in their mid-late 60s and are adamantly against Facebook, so they can’t just “join or make a social media group” in this regard, which I respect for them. Couples must compromise in order to be happy with each other, since that’s how you make a healthy relationship work, successfully. 

3) I really can’t believe you basically just said “If you don’t go to church, you’re not a Christian”. That is complete and utter bullshit. You don’t have to go to church to be a Christian. You can be a great Christian and never go to church. You can’t however, go just to church and say “I’m a good christian”. Anyone can go to church. 

So, let me end this since you ended it in a way that I’m not a fan of.

I do not need your fucking prayers.

I am Pagan and proud. I do not need your prayers because you take pity on me, or hope “I find the light and error of my ways” or some bullshit like that. 

Sincerely,

Moving on. You are simply wrong about going to church. The Bible is very clear on this point. Not only are supposed to go to church, but we are to develop a closeness with each other for a myriad of reasons that are listed in the Bible. We are to pray for each other, carry each other’s burdens, help each other, correct each other, encourage one another, love each other, develop the same mind, to take communion together, to forgive each other, to show kindness to each other, confess sins to one another…the list goes on and on and on. 

You can’t do the above unless you go to church.

See the scripture compare each Christian as a part of the body. You are an eye or foot..etc. You must be connected to the body to be a Christian. As an example, if you cut off your finger never to see it again, you would not consider that finger as part of your body. Besides it would get all stinky and rot. That is the Christian apart from the body. 

You can call yourself anything, but if you don’t go to church you probably are not a Christian. But I say probably because only God know for sure. But as the Bible says we will know fellow Christians by their fruits. If they are never in church how do we see their fruits?  If you aren’t active in a local church you will get the same feeling you had when you went to church, kind of out of place. 

Driving an hour to church is a huge problem. It leads to the problems that you have lined out. If you are a Christian you make your life choices based upon your relationship with God. I am not going to go through all of the possibilities but they are endless. Move closer to the church, pick a different church it doesn’t matter. If you are a Christian your life is to be directed purely on what God’s plan is for you, not what you want to do. When you are a Christian, you don’t get to pick and choose, it is God’s will first. 

One of your biggest misses is that the Christian faith has anything to do with personal happiness. It doesn’t. The Christian faith is about sacrifice, losing self and becoming more like Jesus. Happiness comes and goes, joy in Christ is forever. 

As far as there being many flavors of Christian, you are again wrong. You are either a Christian or you are not. Not only that Jesus said, “But since you are like lukewarm water, neither hot nor cold, I will spit you out of my mouth!” That mean that we are to be either a Christian or not. There is no middle ground. You either believe the Bible or you don’t. You either take communion with a body of believers or don’t. 

Now I will grant you there are several issues that are not totally agreed on in the Bible, but these are superficial things such as the time of the worship service or whether you serve wine or grape juice for the Eucharist. That being said, all Christians (to be Christians) must agree on the essentials. Especially in the family unit there should be absolute agreement on the essentials in the rearing of children, the church attended and several key versus. I can tell in your response there was a different perspective regarding spirituality. This must have had a profound influence in your life. 

As a side note, though I believe it's been addressed, in Paganism one usually don't send out energy or do spells (our version of prayers, if you will) without the consent of the person they are trying to help. By ignoring the OPs request that you don't pray for them you are nothing more than a child throwing a stubborn temper tantrum and it's very unbecoming. Most Pagans are more than willing to support the individuals right to their own path, your relationship with the Divine is solely between you and the Divine, but when you show such blatant disrespect you are undermining the bridges we are striving to build. Life is crazy, the world has gone insane, and instead of bickering and drawing lines in the sand we should strive to look for the similarities in our paths. This will allow us to cultivate relationships with a foundation of mutual respect so that we may create a united front against those who seek to divide and conquor. Does that mean you should give up your own faith and your own personal convictions? Not at all, I am simply suggesting you consider the fact that other people have all of the same rights as you when it comes to finding the faith that pushes them to be the absolute best version of themself.

Oh, one last thing. There are indeed may flavors of Christianity. Yes, you all believe that Jesus is the light and no one may enter the gates of heaven but through him, but literally every single other thing can vary church to church. Some churches believe children should be beaten, if a child is molested they are just as much of a sinner for "allowing" it to happen, or that rape victims have engaged in the sin of adultry. Other churches believe homophobia is a sin and you can pray the gay away while some believe that their God does not make mistakes so homosexuality is NOT a sin. Some believe the Bible is the literal word of the Christian God and filled with nothing but facts and some find the Bible is more of a teaching tool full of lessons told through allagory. Some churches speak in tongues, others encourage spontaneous outburst of Holy Spirit filled elation. I could keep listing but I'm sure you've gotten the idea by now. All of these churches believe in the same God, all of these churches believe Christ died for their sins, so which one is correct on all the other stuff? Is a man who beats his children for the glory of God a better or worse Christian than someone who believes children are a gift from God and should be cherished?

They’re more comfortable, still form fitting, and best of all: THE POCKETS. THEY HAVE ACTUAL POCKETS.

don’t believe me? look:

these are boys pants, and they look just as good on me as any other skinny jeans I own

See that phone? I’m going to put it in the pocket. Must be so small right??

Ah yes, girl pants length. Probably can’t fit any further than that-

what? what’s this?

Good god. Oh good lord in heaven. This is blasphemous.

Look at how much room is still there. There’s chaos in the streets. Babies are crying. Fashion designers are screaming out of fear of the unknown.

How has this become a universally known thing

Or do they Google it

Are there charts how are they actually keeping track of this babies start doing so many things in such a short amount of time I’d forget that the “kid should be talking by now” date had passed until they were starting kindergarten or something

*google all the stuff*

...OMG WHY?! WTF IS THAT?! WHO POSTS THIS SHIT?!

The best deodorant you will ever use Seriously. ¼ teaspoon in each pit and you can sweat your ass off, totally stink-free for like 2 full days. It’s a natural anti-bacterial so those little fuckers won’t multiply and make you smell. Plus it’s cheaper and healthier than any deod you can buy anywhere.

Use equal parts of the following:

-corn starch -baking soda -coconut oil -cocoa butter

With a few drops of whatever essential oil you want, for fragrance. Otherwise it basically just smells like nothing. I use tea tree oil & pine needle oil. Cuz they’re MANLY.

Based on an ask. Edited for a post here.

_________

My essentials are: sea salt on hand (my container of sea salt sits on a shelf rather than in a cupboard) and chalk. Chalk’s super handy because you can draw on just about any surface with whatever symbols you find protective (or just write some words you find a source of protection or strength in) Salt’s useful to pour over doorways/windows/other thresholds to protect. I know one witch in Hawai'i that had a little mound of sea salt on their front step. Swore up and down that it protected them from their abusive father’s ghost. The best protection spells are the simplest ones I find. Growing protective herbs or plants at the door. Wash the floor with water that’s you’ve laced with protective energy or herbs/crystals/etc. Iron is super useful. I got two huge iron nails at Lowe’s for .97 each. I doused them with protective oils (a really, really foul smelling oil I made up) and stuck them out in the yard on either side of the door. I know someone who keeps a pair of scissors in the window to ward of fae. (I keep a pair of scissors under the bed for the same reason). A witch-bottle is super useful and doesn’t need to be complicated. Some broken glass, nails, and whatever other nasty things you can thing of go inside a jar you don’t want (spaghetti sauce jars are perfect for this). Cap the bottle, cover it in wax, and bury it in the yard (or if you don’t have a yard, a flower pot).