We used to dunk on people asking random users on here questions they could’ve googled but now that every single google search gives you an AI generated response it’s actually better for the environment to just ask a random tumblr user and see what they have to say.

just got a blazed post about sonic laying eggsacs from his cloaca, maybe I will turn on that ad-free after all

apparently my mom reads my tumblr

apparently my book’s publicity team also reads my tumblr

*becomes a vtuber and does nothing but play solitaire on stream for 5 hours straight without winning a single game*

as we march towards a shining era of more people calling their friends "babe" and "sweetheart" platonically, let us also strive towards a brighter tomorrow wherein more couples call each other "bruh" and "my dude" as a term of romantic endearment

So cute!

they trottin’

My friend is trying to name herself, and she's like, "Oh, what's that name that's like marmalade, but it's a name?" and I know she means Adelaide, but I think I can talk her into naming herself Marmalade if I play my cards right here.

Not in a hateful, cruel way, but because my name is Newt, and I think "Newt & Marmalade" sounds like a detective agency that solves mysteries for tiny garden critters.