visions of gideon.

That sounds like a miserable life. Because I know some other woman would come along and try to snatch you up. And I would have been gazing from a distance, glaring daggers at her. I’m very glad everything worked out like it was supposed to. I couldn’t imagine my life without you. And I know the boys definitely couldn’t either. Their birth father wasn’t man enough to stick around for them. So I’m so overwhelmingly happy that they have a strong male role model like you to look up to. Harper and Ford are just as much my children as Anacan and Ariel. Not to mention, I absolutely adore your ex wife and I don’t know what I would do without her as well. I’m sure our neighbors hate us, but I don’t even care. I’d be willing to have a dozen more kids with you, just because I love being the mother to your children. You definitely are the world’s most perfect man, Armand. Your lame dad jokes, your goofy dance moves, and your kind heart have completely won me over and I’m so overwhelmingly in love with you. Both myself and the kids absolutely adore you. I’m thinking we’ll have a whole reenactment of our first night together. Some drinks down by the bar. And then once we’re all liquored up, I’ll jump into your arms as soon as we walk into our hotel room. I figured I’d take control just like that first night a few years ago. I just better not wake up without you in bed next to me again the next morning. 

As if I’d be interested in anyone but you. You’re the whole package, babe. I’m convinced no other woman even scratches the surface when it comes to you. You’re all I could have wanted and all I’ll ever want. Yeah, fuck that guy. He didn’t value you or your kids or treat any of you the way that he should have. You all deserved so much better than that asshole and I’m happy to do what I can. I’m glad your sons have gotten used to me so quickly, I was a little nervous to just come into their life out of nowhere, but I’m happy it worked out so well. A dozen more? Don’t tempt me, babe. Our little Piper is getting older and older and I miss taking care of a newborn. We need some time for ourselves, though. We’re raising five children and we’re never not busy with them. But I wanna enjoy these years before they move off to college and all of that other scary stuff. I’m so overwhelmingly in love with you as well, sweetheart. You’re my literal dream woman and I’ll never be able to get enough of you, ever. I’m more than okay with that. You know I love it when you’re in control of everything, too. Oh no, of course not. Things are so drastically different now, I’d never do something like that. 

That sounds like a good backup plan. Although I don’t think she’ll ever ask. but just in case, it’s good to have a plan in motion. I definitely didn’t want to be just friends with you. Because look at you. But if things wouldn’t have gone in the direction they did, I would have settled for it and just pined over you from afar. However, I’m very happy with the way things worked out. Our babies meshed together beautifully and we’re just one big happy family now. Aw, babe. You’re making me blush over here. I’m still in awe every single morning that I get to wake up next to you. I still don’t fully understand how I ended up with the world’s most perfect man. You’re so good to me and so good to the kids. You’re the best father and I already know you’re the greatest husband. We’re going to be doing a hell of a lot more than just waking up in that bed.

I’d be in the exact same boat as you, though. We’d both be losers just pining from a distance, never talking about our feelings or anything. I love your sons as if they were my own. They’re two of the best things to come into my life. We have the craziest and loudest house on the block, but I wouldn’t have it any other way. World’s most perfect man, huh? That’s a high claim you’re making there, my love. I’m far from perfect. You, on the other hand? The very definition of perfect. My favorite thing is being able to love you and the kids and take care of all of you. Nothing else in the world comes close to the feeling of loving all of you. Oh yeah? Tell me more. 

Yes, permission granted for sure. Don’t worry, if she ever asks about what happened to the dress, I’ll just tell her it must have gotten lost or accidentally donated over time. She’ll never ask questions or get suspicious. Yeah, I definitely wasn’t in any frame of mind to be playing games. But when I met you, I didn’t think I was ready for another relationship either. You changed the game for me though. I love that idea. I think it’s only fitting that we go back to the spot where it all began. Maybe we can even attempt to get the same exact hotel room just for nostalgia’s sake. You always entertain me, babe. You don’t even have to try and I’m impressed and entertained. 

If she does we’ll just buy you a new one. You can just act like you found it hidden deep inside your closet one day. She’ll never know, right? I mean, me either. I was perfectly fine being friends and all but then I just fell for you. I couldn’t help it. You’re the sweetest person alive with a heart made of actual gold and honey and I’m in love with you, have been since we met. Oh, of course. I’ll make the reservations and see what we can do. It’ll be nice to wake up in that bed again. 

I guarantee that tonight will be the only time I wear this dress. So that just gives you even more freedom to rip it to shreds and not feel an ounce of guilt in the process. As a matter of fact, I welcome it. I’ve felt married to you since we first met. I think it’s because we were always so content and settled with all of our kids. But I think that it just makes sense to make it official now. I really want to marry the fuck out of you and then go away on a super romantic honeymoon with just the two of us. We can go back to the same place in the Caymans where everything began for us. That way it’s like everything has come full circle. Babe, you’re hands down the most entertaining dancer out here. Sure, you may not be the best. But your moves are like no one else’s and I could watch you get your groove on all night if I could.

Permission granted? Thank you. Just don’t tell Sersh, she might come for my ass if she finds out. I think so. When we met we weren’t really looking to go through all the games and all that, you know? I mean, we did have some bumps along the way, but I think we mostly just meshed together really well. I’d love to go back to the Caymans with you. We’ll have a ceremony at home with our friends and then we can have another one on the beach where we had our first date, just the two of us. I’ll remarry you all the time just because. Well, as long as you’re entertained that’s literally all I care about. Fuck everyone else... except for the bride and groom, of course. As long as my girl is entertained, that’s all I care about. 

I’m sure she wouldn’t be too weirded out by it. But I’m glad the message went right to me instead of through her anyway. It’s a good thing bridesmaids dresses are only worn one time. Because you can most definitely rip it off of me and not even feel an ounce of remorse. Don’t worry, your secret it safe with me. I have to say, I love the idea of finally making things official and taking that leap. Even though you’ve been my husband in my mind for so long already. It just makes sense to have it on paper finally. Drinking also brings out all of your best dance moves. I have to say, you’re a beast on the dance floor, babe. Not to mention, you’re hot as hell and I can’t keep my eyes off of you.

Maybe not, but I’m just not sure Sersh and I are quite at that level. Only worn once, huh? I’m getting all sorts of ideas of the things I want to do to you later, so that’s good to know. Yeah, I mean, I definitely think it’s time. It’s been time, there’s just never been a rush, you know? We’ve basically been married since the day we met. We can talk out all the details once we’re back home, but I’m ready to marry the fuck out of you. Did you hit your head? Drinking brings out my best movies? 

Well you can thank Saoirse, since the dress was her pick and everything. Wow, you’re saying that I look even better than your man crush? I’m truly honored. Even though I feel like we’re already basically married, I still can’t wait until I’m the one walking down the aisle towards you. yes, of course I want you to get drunk and dance. Your best dance moves always come out when you’re drunk. Just don’t over do it and end up falling over. I don’t think I can carry your giant self back tot he hotel room on my own.

It might be a little awkward for me to thank your best friend friend for putting you in a dress that I want to rip off of you later tonight. So, you know, I’ll just tell you instead. Oh hell yeah. One-thousand times better, but don’t tell him I siad that or he’ll get hurt. We pretty much are at this point, but there’s nothing wrong with just officially doing it, you know? Even if it’s just a small thing. I make no promises. Drinking and not overdoing it doesn’t really work out for me. I drink and I think I’m invincible.

First of all, you look incredibly handsome all dressed up in your suit and it’s an honor to walk down the aisle with you. Although next time I walk down an aisle, I plan on being the one in white. But until then, let’s get drunk and you can show me all your best dance moves.

You’re one to talk, babe. That dress is hugging you in all of the right places and my eyes have been glued to you all damn night. Not even Ansel looks as good as you do. I agree, though. The next time either of us are taking a walk down that aisle, it better be for us. I’ll get working on that soon. You really want me to get drunk and dance? That may end up being a disaster.

Candice: I'll be up to bed after this episode of One Tree Hill.

Candice: I may be all heart eyes over the Scott brothers in this show. But I'm going to need some serious cuddles when I come to bed.

Armie: Take your time, I'll just be up here NOT watching One Tree Hill.

𝓬𝓪𝓷𝓭𝓲𝓬𝓮,

happy international women’s day to one badass beautiful babe. how do i even begin to write this? when you walked into my life, all of my dreams came true. i found a partner that i actually saw a forever with. i saw a woman who loved my children like her own, and someone i wanted to have more children with. i saw a woman who cared for me through all of the ups and downs, the busy schedules, and the frequent conflicting timezones. you are my real life angel and i adore the hell out of you. despite being together as long as we have, every now and then i’ll wake up in the middle of the night and look over at you and wonder how the fuck i got so lucky. as you lay there next to me i wonder how anything could ever be as beautiful as you, and how thankful i am that you came into my life right when you did. i can’t imagine my life without you. you are the absolute love of my life and the strongest woman that i know. i love you so so much. 

Ansel: DUDE.

Ansel: I can't even believe it.

Ansel: I mean it's been almost a week. But like I'm ENGAGED.

Ansel: Also, I should ask you in person but I'm too excited to wait. Will you be my best man?

Armie: I guess this means our wedding is off. It's okay.

Ansel: SINCE SUNDAY.

Ansel: AFTER THE OSCARS.

Armie: DUDE

Armie: CONGRATS, MAN!!!! HOLY SHIT

Ansel: I thought you were telling me “not now” like it wasn’t a good time for you.

Ansel: BECAUSE I’M AN ENGAGED MAN, NOW.

Armie: UHHHHH WHAT

Armie: WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU’RE ENGAGED

Ansel: Are you busy? I meed to catch you up on life and things.

Ansel: Things are good. I'm just happy to be home with Saoirse and Baby. If I had to spend another day in there without them, I probably would have gone insane. How are you though? How is Candice and the kids? Saoirse and I have been talking about coming out there to visit for a bit sometime soon.

Ansel: I don't know if you've heard. But I'm back home now. And I know the last time we talked, we weren't on the best terms. But now that I'm home, I'd love to hang out with you sometime. I miss you.