rivers of starlight

Ellie’s used to weird things. She’s used to weird people and places, because you have to be if you’re from Boston and also went to Military school. But this town has a weirdness that she’s not comfortable with yet, and she can’t put her finger on why.

Maybe it all started with that weirdo lady at the park, who tried to grab onto JJ like she knew him. And maybe it was the wobble in her voice or the torn look on her face, the kind of look that seemed to expect something from her. Or maybe it was all the weird shit she swears she hears sometimes, like that incessant fucking clicking noise that seems to come from nowhere. 

It’s this feeling of being watched by something or someone and maybe, fucking maybe it’s the also the weird guy looking at her now. Ellie doesn’t go out much, she makes it a point not to, because she has a baby and homework and being home makes her feel safer than aimlessly walking around this weird place. So she doesn’t go out, except that today she did. She’d made the mistake of coming to The White Rabbit and now some old guy is looking at her the same way that lady at the park did. And Ellie doesn’t know what to do with that. 

“Does everyone in this town have a fucking staring problem? Dude, I swear that if you get creepy I can one hundred percent defend myself.” She reaches for her switchblade that she’s been carrying on her for as long as she can remember. Ellie makes a show of twirling it in her hand but stops when she really takes the man in.

“No offense but you look like shit.”

It was one thing to be told that Ellie did not remember who the fuck he was but to actually have it confirmed? Now that was a different kind of pain, a pain he never wanted to experience. He had lost two of his daughters and both of them due to his inability to not fail them. He didn't know if he could handle looking into Ellie's eyes after everything they had gone through and tell her who he was only to be scoffed at. Joel could handle a lot of things but losing Ellie was not something he would ever be able to cope with. He would truly burn the world to the ground in order to keep her safe and honestly? He already had. In his quest to protect his daughter he had killed people that shouldn't have been killed. Would he do it again? Oh of course. But that didn't mean that the guilt didn't eat him alive. 

Taking a deep breath, he let out a dry chuckle. "I know. But I don't really have the time to care about how I look" Joel muttered. He decided to let all of his protective walls go up. He decided that it would be best to just play it cool and like the two of them didn't actually know each other. 

He didn't want to be in this situation but he didn't really have a say in the matter. Something about this town took away memories or replaced them with memories that were not the right ones. Joel had listened to many people talk about it but it never really made any sense to him how something as insignificant as a town could do such a thing. But the more he lived here, the more things he saw and it became impossible to be a skeptic. Especially now when this was happening to someone he cared deeply about. 

"And yes everyone in this town does have a staring problem. Better get used to it"

Dina was at a loss. She had been searching for days now, and this town wasn’t that big. She knew, of course she knew that there were a lot of places where a child of not even a year old could hide, or be hidden from her, but Dina also knew that at some point, she would have to accept the possibility that JJ wasn’t even here. That she was stuck in this place, and her son was somewhere else. Alone, cold, abandoned by his mother in a world that didn’t treat anyone with kindness. 

She nodded towards the empty seat in front of her, lifting her lukewarm coffee to her lips just to inhale the scent of it. She didn’t take a sip of it, she’d barely taken any sips of it ever since she got it from the nice guy at the register, but it’s been something warm to wrap her hands around, and a familiar scent to breathe in when the overwhelming result of nothing became too much. “Go ahead,” she nodded with a faint smile.

Her smiles never really reached her eyes these days. She did seem relieved, though, when Gimli offered her help. Dina would take all the help she could get. Pride and trust didn’t matter anymore. The only thing that mattered was finding JJ. “I’d really appreciate that.”

To lose someone that you love is never easy and especially not if that someone is your child. If he could then he would do everything in his power to make sure that this young mother will find her child as soon as possible. This town was confusing and odd but it was also dangerous but he kept that to himself as he didn't want to make her worry more than she clearly already did. Maybe he should ask more questions of where she saw her child last but he also didn't want to upset her. The last thing he wanted was to leave this interaction with someone in an even worse state of mind. Then he would have done a bad job and he had never been one to do such a thing. 

Sitting down on the opposite end of the table so that he could study her a little easier, he clasped his hands and sighed softly. Talking to people wasn't really something he did all that often. It was mainly due to the fact that he didn't know how to navigate conversations that were rather mundane. It was easier for him to navigate conversations that were about battle plans and how to survive. 

"It would be an honour to help"

Lancelot understood on an intellectual level that her world had been somewhat different from theirs, despite having similarities. Arthur had explained it to her. On a practical level, it didn’t matter to her. Arthur was her king. Guinevere was her queen. She didn’t expect to be treated as *their* Lancelot, but Arthur didn’t seem to care. He seemed happy to have her here regardless. She couldn’t read Guinevere well enough to say if she felt the same.

“I apologize, my queen. This must be strange for you, as it is for me. Arthur explained that I am… not like your Lancelot.” The corner of her mouth pulled up in a smile. She’d read many versions of their story as she traveled, so she’d had plenty of time to adjust to none of the Lancelots being women. “Regardless, I am here to serve my king. I would like it if we could be friends as well, if that is not overstepping.”

Gwen could feel herself get more and more nervous the more Lancelot spoke. She didn’t know how to speak to her due to the fact that there’s so much history between them. History that she didn’t seem to remember. It was a shame as it would make talking to the blonde much more easier but that didn’t mean that she would give up. Oh no.. of course not. Guinevere had missed Lancelot greatly and to be able to see her even though like she said it wasn’t technically her Lancelot it did not matter in her eyes. Lancelot was Lancelot no matter what universe that Lancelot came from. It was just comforting to see someone who still had that kind smile. The smile that had so effortlessly drawn her in back home. 

“Friends” she whispered and then nodded as she turned and slowly made her way over to her desk, her fingertips gently brushing over the wood before she jumped up to sit on it. “If that is what you want then yes we can be friends” the mayor then sighed. 

It had taken Jesus months to feel safe here, and there were still days he woke up expecting to hear the groans of the dead. Maybe by normal standards, Sallow Hills was a spooky town, but their standards hadn’t been normal for a long time. There was nothing here that scared him more than home.

“No, you’re right, I’m sorry. It’s kind of a long story. Let’s walk? I’ll tell you everything I know.” They were still blocking the door of Caffi Rhees, and he stepped aside. He thought Daryl would be more comfortable if they stayed outside. He’d been more comfortable outside for months and still was sometimes. Any room could feel like a trap.

“How long have you been here?” He didn’t know how to start without getting an idea of how much he knew already. The disappearances were one thing, but maybe he hadn’t even tried to leave yet. Maybe he didn’t know they couldn’t.

“Yeah yeah okay let’s take a walk” he needed to know what the hell was going on and how Jesus was alive and well. Why he wasn’t a corpse or a fond memory that resided within his mind. The last thing he wanted was to lose him again but he couldn’t help the fact that he was confused. Nothing about this place made any sense but then again nothing about the place they once used to call their home made any sense either. They were surrounded with death and yet when they have a chance at life they have no idea how to cope. It was a shame and it was confusing. 

“I’ve been here since November” Daryl muttered. He had never been one to talk in a loud voice. He was rather quiet and very reserved due to the fact that being around people and talking to them was rather draining. He would much rather just sit alone in a corner, read a good book or practice his aim at the crossbow. 

“What about you? How long have you been here?”

“Giving only, yeah? I’m flexible,” he chuckled softly. Constantine didn’t excel at following orders anywhere, but he could let the right person call the shots if they caught his attention. He’d be a liar if he said he didn’t like it when Zatanna got bossy with him. Then again, John would go to hell and back if he thought there was some interesting sex in it. He lit his cigarette and tucked the pack back into one of many coat pockets, pulling on it contemplatively while Jack spoke.

“But who’s counting? Five years…” He let the sentence trail. That was probably nothing Zee didn’t already know, but regardless, she wasn’t going to like it. Couldn’t say he liked it much himself. He had better things to do with his time than stumble around the same town for years, no matter how mysterious. “That’s the whole world, mate. What’s so different about this place?”

“I have always been someone who likes to boss my partner around. I am mostly a giver and that’s just how I am as a person” he shrugged. Especially when the person he was giving all his loving to was Ianto Jones, the most beautiful and incredible man he had ever had the pleasure of meeting and getting to know. He smiled whenever he thought how far they have come in their relationship. How much they had both grown and gotten to know how to take care of one another. It was comforting and it was something he never wanted to lose. 

“That is the thing about this place.. you never get out of here unless you disappear” Jack then licked his lips and shrugged. “It’s Wales. I have many fond memories of this place. It’s here that I met my boyfriend”

“Wow. You have very strong feelings about capitalism. I can’t say I disagree, since I just moved out of the BnB and still need to pay my rent.” She raised an eyebrow at the little rant, but Mia couldn’t say he was wrong. Capitalism sucked. Paying rent sucked. Moving out of the BnB right before the Prince burned also sucked for her, specifically. Things would have to get a lot worse before she could stand to move back in there, even for free.

“I don’t have to think about it. It’s the only offer I’ve gotten in days, so I accept. And… I appreciate it,” she added after a slight pause. Gratitude didn’t come easily to her. She had the sense he was only offering out of pity, and that didn’t sit well with her either. But no matter how she looked at the situation, it was going to involve her swallowing her pride at some point. This seemed like the least of the evils. “I’m Mia.”

“Well when you have lived for as long as I have you get quite tired of seeing how capitalism still ruins so many amazing lives. Lives that should be left alone” he mused and shrugged. People should be able to do whatever the hell they wanted to do. They should have to be pushed into a profession that later on drained them and left them burnt out and possibly depressed. He had many opinions when it came to capitalism and the way life was sacred and should be appreciated. But he kept most of them to himself. 

He smiled when she accepted the offer, letting out a sigh of relief. “I’m Jack. It’s a pleasure to meet you, Mia” Jack then rubbed his arm, the guilt once again hitting him square in the chest. 

“Oh, I was never bored there. I miss London quite a lot, actually. It’s home.” She shrugged, not wistful so much as matter-of-fact the way Penny always was. In terms of countries she’d visited, Wales was above America but not as good as Mother England, of course. She was happy not to be trapped in Nebraska, no offense Shepard.

“Nice to meet you too, Marlene. What brings you to Sallow Hills?” For a seemingly innocent question, the answers to it could tell her a lot about who she was talking to. Many of the travelers had no idea how or why they’d arrived here, but not always. Some of them came here willingly, and some just believed they had.

“What brings me to Sallow Hills? Well my family lives here and I have always felt like this is my home. London is nice and all but I have always been someone who likes a little bit of peace and quiet. I like to not be surrounded by the sound of cars and shouting. I like to hear the wind blow in the trees and the gentle humming of the earth” Marlene mused and then rubbed one of her arms, cheeks heating up once again when she noticed that she was rambling because of course she was. When it came to these things she couldn’t really help it.

“As you may have noticed.. I am somewhat of a nature lover”

Getting those texts from Dina caused a sense of panic and dread to creep up Joel’s spine. The temporary happiness of Ellie being in this town had quickly been replaced with heartbreak and confusion. She didn’t know who he or Dina were and that caused his head to spin as so many thoughts entered his mind. He felt so scattered, he felt so lost and it was all due to the fact that he had not only lost Ellie back home but also here in Sallow which was supposed to be his second chance. His other shot at life. 

The migraine he experienced every now and then due to the aftermath of what happened back home was back in full swing, his temples throbbing and eye sight getting fuzzy. It felt like any second now he would fall over but he tried his best not to as he didn’t want to make anyone, friend or stranger worry about him and his well being. 

Seeing the familiar face of his daughter Ellie caused his heart to ache. He was supposed to be happy to see her but now all he felt was anxiety. How the hell was he supposed to talk to someone that he had so much history with that all of the sudden didn’t remember a single thing?

“No, I do not.” She hesitated. Uncertainty wasn’t like Lancelot, but she truly didn’t want to intrude upon the woman’s time. She understood that mayors were very busy, much like monarchs only elected by the people. It was more power than Lancelot ever would have wanted for herself. All she’d ever wanted was to protect her king and Camelot. One of those was beyond her reach now, but finding her king again gave her a renewed sense of purpose.

She decided to introduce herself and leave it up to Guinevere whether she considered it important. “I only wished to speak with you, when you have time. I can return later. King Arthur told me you were here. I am Sir Lancelot du Lac.” She’d chosen the title long ago, even though Lady and Lady Knight were available to her. Being a woman already set her apart from the other knights, and she didn’t wish to further divide herself from them. It was a constant reminder to them and to herself. I am every bit as good as you are.

She was about to speak but when she heard the introduction she could feel her cheeks heat up. There were many people she missed. Many voices that she missed the sound of. But she had long accepted the fact that the chance of ever seeing them again was slim to none. It was a miracle that Merlin and Arthur were here in Sallow, a miracle she did not take for granted. But how many more miracles would she be granted? Would the stars ever align just perfectly to bless her with the presence of more people from home that she held near and dear to her heart?

It seemed like today she had been granted an answer. Because standing here facing Lancelot after god knows how many years apart felt comforting. But then she could feel how doubt started to creep up her spine and dig their claws into her heart. Was the excitement, comfort and relief one sided? Taking a deep breath, Guinevere then looked down when she realized that she had been staring at the blonde. “Well.. here I am”