LEAN, MEAN, MEME MACHINE.

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❛  the vampire army has taken the city!  ❜ ❛  we must check the tower and make sure that no vampire have gotten into our home base.  ❜ ❛  you wait here,  i’ll go check the castle!  ❜ ❛  yes,  you do that.  ❜ ❛  oh my god [name]!  i just saw a fucking vampire!  ❜ ❛  it bit me right in the neck!  ❜ ❛  save yourself [name]!  ❜ ❛  SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT!  ❜ ❛  [name] i will avenge you!  ❜ ❛   i shall hunt down each and everyone down in this town,  and drive a wooden steak through their heart.  ❜ ❛  all this for my friend [name].  ❜ ❛  oh no!  [name] turn around!  ❜ ❛  he turned into a vampire!  ❜ ❛  he’s gonna bite you!  ❜ ❛  oh shit!  ❜ ❛  [name]! i can’t watch this!  ❜ ❛  hey everybody,   i can’t watch this!  ❜ ❛  well some of us are trying to!  ❜ ❛ who said that?  ❜ ❛  which one of y’all dead mother fuckers just said that?  ❜ ❛  was it you stringbean?  you skinny-ass lookin’ mothafucka!  ❜ ❛  turn around and say it again!  ❜ ❛  will you please be QUIET?!  ❜ ❛  [name] that is the president of the united states!  ❜ ❛  i don’t care who he is,  he’s ruining hamlet!  ❜ ❛  oh!  now you fucked up!  ❜ ❛  you have fucked up now!  ❜ ❛  now you fucked up!  now you fucked up!  now you fucked up!  now you fucked up!  now you fucked up!  ❜ ❛  now you have fucked up!  ❜ ❛  mister president,  will you please be QUIET?!  ❜ ❛  suck my presidential cock,  BITCH!  ❜ ❛  you fatass piece of shit!  ❜ ❛  you tubalard lookin’ mothafucka! ❜ ❛  what?  what?  what?  what?  what?  HEY!  ❜ ❛  I don’t know why you’re lookin’ up at me bitch,  play’s on stage!  ❜ ❛  I’m not puttin’ on a play up here!  ❜ ❛  i’m tryin’ to be entertained right now!  ❜ ❛  mister president!  be!  QUIET!  ❜ ❛  [name].  calm down!  ❜ ❛  listen to the man/woman,  [name]!  ❜ ❛  calm down,  just calm down!  ❜ ❛  hey!  acty!  stop the play!  ❜ ❛  i gotta go to the bathroom.  i drank too much liquid now i gotta piss.  ❜ ❛  oh,  i got a bottle!  ❜ ❛  i got a bottle,  it’s aiight.  ❜ ❛  rewind the play five minutes though cause that fat piece of shit was talkin’ i couldn’t pay attention to what you guys was doin’ so rewind the play five minutes.  ❜ ❛  and you shut the fuck up!  ❜ ❛  that’s it.  i’m gonna do what i should’ve done a long time ago. ❜ ❛  [name], what are you going to do?  ❜ ❛  i’m gonna beat him to death with this hammer.  ❜ ❛  ho!  what're you doin' skinny?  ❜ ❛  what’re you doin’ you fat piece of shit?  ❜ ❛  where’s he goin’?  ❜ ❛  what’s that fat piece of shit doin’ now?  ❜ ❛  OH SHIT!  ❜ ❛  he’s hittin’ me in the butt!  ❜ ❛  he’s hittin’ my butt!  ❜ ❛  don’t break my butt!  ❜ ❛   he’s breakin’ my butt!  ❜ ❛  ladies and gentlemen, that is what actually happened that night all those years ago.  ❜ ❛  american historians and documentarians believe that the actual events were far too embarrassing for a growing nation to endure.  ❜ ❛  but [name] actually got hammered in the ass so much that he died of being hammered in the ass.  ❜ ❛  thank you,  goodnight.  ❜

alternately send “🙆🏼” to catch my muse with their hair up !