Omnia Vanis, Omnia Magnum

Sometimes it's with a smile, sometimes a somber thought, sometimes a gut wrenching pain, sometimes a restless clinging to a pillow until 3am thinking of all the things I would have done differently to take your pain away. I miss you in so many ways.

I wish somebody would think this and not forget it. Or on the flip side that I could remember it and not run away. I wished upon the meteor shower. It was that I'd feel intimate love for the first time in my life this year. But I'm tired of putting myself out there and finding myself in emotional pain. For me it's the worst type of pain, the hardest for me to cope with. I had a friend tell me once who has had many loves that it's hard but it's worth it. But so far for me, it hasn't been.